"And I thought that they were just doing it for the show, so when we were alone in the den, I told them that they didn't have to act anymore."

My chest was heavy with guilt, my head was hurting from the stress, my hands were numb from the anxiety, and my heart was broken from everything. Unluckily for me, my parents brushed past the Giselle part ― even if they told her they'd talk later ― and gave me all their attention, which I did not want, but I had no choice but to continue. It hurt to tell them about Broadway. About how I either had the best or the worst days ever. How most of my days finished with a panic attack and how I lied to Kara right to her face.

Then, I started talking about how everything was when I came back. When I strained a smile and told my mom I had a great first day back when she drove us back home that Tuesday night. When Giselle's and Kendall's words were stuck in my head all week long. When I wasn't even able to sleep because of them.

But the story was becoming worse by the second, and I knew that I was going to reach that part soon, so I started to mentally prepare as I told them all about the day Maddie called me to the bathroom. I told them about how she actually believed me and how relieved I felt.

Seriously, I don't think I would have gotten past those few weeks if it wasn't for her. She was the only reason I even wanted to show up anymore.

I moved on to talk about the argument I had with Giselle about Kendall. About how she kept on blaming me about the voicemail but didn't even bother to tell me what it actually said, but still, I did have someone. Maddie and Asia. As I talked about Asia, I soon realized how much I missed her. I continued talking, telling them about how the other girls "forgave" me during nationals and how everything was going back to normal until the Hylands left. For some reason, I had never felt more vulnerable in my life, and then Abby told me to go to studio "C" because I wasn't "focused" to learn my solo that week.

At studio "C".

Everything was about to go down, and I wasn't sure if I wanted that to happen, but with no other choice ― like everything else at that moment ― I started telling them everything.

Sadly, I remembered even the most insignificant details of that afternoon. That was exactly what kept me up most nights.

"She wanted me to start with the pointe thing on the nineteenth, but I didn't want to because I didn't want to get hurt," I explained, tugging the right arm's sleeve down. "Because you're supposed to start pointe when your feet are strong enough. People say that you're supposed to start at thirteen, so I told her I would do it in a couple of years-- she looked annoyed that I said no and said that I needed to renew the contract. I-I didn't know the contract was over. I thought it was six seasons like the Zieglers." I looked up at Mom and then back down. "So maybe I didn't think it through, but I told her I wanted to leave because then maybe we could finally do our plans of moving to Arizona like you always said, but she got mad--"

I choked up at that moment and hoped I wouldn't start crying before I told them everything.

"--She started saying stuff like, "what about me? are you going to take all the things I taught you and give them to someone else?". I was starting to feel bad, but then she got scary and said that I was an ungrateful and ignorant person that didn't care about anyone but herself." That was when I realized I was actually crying. The tears rolled down my face, but I didn't even try to wipe them away. "She said that the girls were using me because I was famous. She then played an audio of an argument between her, Christi, Giselle-- and mom, and they made you choose a daughter, but you chose Giselle and I felt so-- so weird. Like, broken..?"

Something came back to mind, but I wondered if it was a good idea to tell them. Still, it wasn't like I was looking at them. They were probably mad I hid all of that for so long.

"But before she told me the things with the girls and the audio, I was going to leave-- then, s-she grabbed me-- by the arm, she turned me back around, and she dug her nails on my arms and it hurt really, really bad. I started crying because I was scared, but then she said that I couldn't be a crybaby-- like she always says, but she grabbed me by the chin so I would look at her and told me that I would be nothing without her."

The only thing I was able to do after that was sob, over and over again.

"But she never said a name," Giselle spoke up, trying to process it herself. "They left the room and then they argued."

I already knew the outcome of it, but I still had more things to tell before that. When I was going to continue, I felt a tap on my left knee.

It was Ava.

And that made me burst out crying.

"Then Christmas happened, and I felt so numb I couldn't even celebrate. I didn't feel happy during Christmas." I admitted and sobbed again. "I didn't feel like I fit in because I missed last year and you started a whole new thing with Ava. She didn't even care if I was there or not because she doesn't even recognize me--" I stood up from the couch and stared at the other four while crying. "I missed her first Christmas and her first birthday. I missed her first steps and even her first words. I missed everything with her and I was the one who always wanted a little sister. I ended up being the one who missed everything, and she doesn't even know who I am--" My voice broke and I looked down at the toddler. "She thinks I'm just a stranger that got in-- and it hurts so fu-- freaking bad."

But it went from bad to worse because she then hugged my legs with a concerned look on her little face. A simple glance at it made me break down entirely and hug her as I sobbed, letting out many of the broken sobs I had grown accustomed to.

I had started to think everything was getting better, but I failed to see the bigger picture.

Giselle hadn't officially left yet, but she could as well have been. Both she and Mom said they were waiting until the next Monday to go and unenroll her from the ALDC, but we had been forced to work with interviews all day yesterday.

Moving on, while Giselle got to stay back and focus on homeschooling, Mom and I ― Giselle was also on babysitting duty for Ava ― had to go to the studio to start with yet another week of heck, four weeks left until nationals edition. In the dancer's den, we were all trying to guess who was going to be on the top. We knew it was going to be either Maddie or someone from the select team due to their win last week.

When we got into studio "A", Abby congratulated specifically Maddie, Lexi, Chloe, and Tea'.

"I have word on the street that, um, Ava will be competing against us this weekend," Tami spoke up. "With her mom's studio.'

"Ooh. Interesting." Abby was definitely thinking something. "And how old exactly is Ava?"

"Twelve." The redhead answered.

"At this particular competition--" She turned back to look at us. "-- the age is ten to twelve. So, my two ten-year-olds will be dancing against Ava." Surprised to learn that they had solos, both 'Tea and Kenzie nodded excitedly. "Maddie--" The girl looked at her. "Bring an extra costume this weekend, 'kay?"

She's having Maddie compete? Well, she hasn't even announced the solos yet.

She also called Christy and Sarah in, apparently inviting them back to the group. When I looked at the pyramid, it wasn't actually a pyramid.

It was a straight line.

Well, a totem pole, the teacher said, and she also said that it was based on this week's group dance, so maybe we should be worrying right now. "Giselle-- actually, where is Giselle?" Her eyes fell on me. "Where is she?"

"She didn't feel well," Mom spoke up.

"I asked Evie, not you." She snapped and I raised my eyebrows.

When she looked back at me, I said the same in a small voice. "She didn't feel well and couldn't come in today."

But Abby looked annoyed at that. "Well, she shouldn't feel well because she was fourth. It was ridiculous." And she moved on. "Nia? You need to step on stage and become one with the character. You pulled focus from the group, but you didn't match the choreography-- technically. Could I be right?" Nia nodded in response. "Maddie can do any face."

That particular comment earned an eye roll from Holly.

"Mackenzie. You pull focus because you get up and down before everybody else has a chance to get off the ground. Pulling focus in a negative way is not good." Abby explained and Kenzie nodded. "Kendall. Your performance was fine. You need to work on your turn-out. When you're supposed to be in parallel, you're great. When you're supposed to be turned out, it looks like you're in parallel."

Just like the last two, Kendall nodded in response, accepting all of the teacher's critiques.

"Evie. You didn't pull my focus in a negative way, but you didn't pull it in a positive way either." She told me. "That's not good. You're slacking off,"

Maddie

Alexis

Chloe

Tea'

Genevieve

Kendall

Mackenzie

Nia

Giselle

"Now, this week, we will be traveling to Waterford, Michigan to attend the regional competition for Energy National Dance Competition, and let's say that the owner doesn't particularly like the ALDC that much," Abby announced. "Everyone's performance this week will determine if they're on the team for nationals or not. Christy, the bus ride is mandatory, so you'll have to come with us, but you'll be sitting in the front and absolutely nothing will come out of your mouth." Christy didn't even react. "Mackenzie? This week, you will be doing a solo. It's a blues number. The name of your routine is "Out of My Mind"."

The girl looked slightly excited about her solo. I don't even remember the last time she competed with a solo.

"The next solo is going to Tea'. Now, Tea', you're doing a musical theater piece. "No Crybabies". That's the name of your routine. You watched that whole thing go down with Ava. I don't want to see that on this team again." Abby told her. "My next solo-- will go to Sarah. You will be competing in the nine and under category. Sarah, you will be doing a lyrical routine. It's entitled "Child of The Holocaust". I need someone nine and under in this team, and you're lucky that Mackenzie wasn't born a few days later, or you wouldn't even be here." That earned a chuckle from both girls. "Now, Sarah, do you know what the Holocaust is?"

Sarah didn't answer, but I was so confused about that question.

What kind of question is that?

But then she said something else that made me realize they were saying something else for the show. "The name of the song is "On My Own". It's a shame that your mother keeps you from being independent." That was weird. "My last solo will be going to-- Evie. Now, your direct competition is Tea', so you'll just have additional competition because you're competing against Tea', Mackenzie, and Ava. Your solo is contemporary, entitled "Watercolor", and you better win because it'd be a shame if you don't, you know?

Was she threatening me right here?

And it looked like I hadn't been the only person to realize that. Most of the girls looked confused by the comment and some of the mothers even looked defensive.

Abby ignored all of us entirely, walking out of the room and walking back in wearing a Native American headdress. As some of the girls cheered, I couldn't help but sigh.

"The group routine is an ethnic piece. The name of the routine is "Tribal Council", and Nia? You will be the lead in the group routine." She placed the headdress on the girl, who was grinning from ear to ear, same as her mother. "It will incorporate jazz, acrobatics, gymnastics, modern, and contemporary. Sarah and Tea'? You will not be in the group routine. I want you to concentrate on your solos."

After being dismissed, she couldn't fail to mention two things. First is that Maddie will be performing on Jimmy Kimmel. Second, it's Kenzie's birthday!

She's old.

She's ten.

But she loves to act like she's thirty.

What a cutie.

Okay, I'll shut up now.

On the first day of rehearsal, we didn't start off with the solos. During the second, Abby first focused on Sarah's before moving on to the group routine. I guessed that she would work with the rest later on during the afternoon. She was also being extremely critical of the group routine ― particularly with its lead, Nia ― and she expressed her dissatisfaction by yelling left and right as we continued to dance.

"Perform, Nia, perform!" Abby yelled from her spot on the prop.

I couldn't lie, this routine was hard. There was not a single break and it was starting to show through heavy breathing and sweaty faces, but every time someone slowed down, they ended up getting yelled at. Abby was already annoyed that Giselle didn't show up either ― which I was sure she'd ask me about later ― but with the group dance, she was even more annoyed and frustrated.

Abby continued. "It doesn't look like Maddie-- stop!"

Some other time, we would have probably continued, but this time, we were all too eager to stop, so we did immediately. We were called over, so I passed my right hand over my sweaty forehead, and ― trying to not look that fatigued ― walked up to the teacher with the rest of the girls. Standing behind the Frazier girl, I slowly caught my breath as I looked around the area. While I did that, Abby rambled on and on about some random thing, but when I started connecting the pieces, it was about Maddie. The next thing I know, Maddie is walking up to the middle of the room and Gianna is pressing play to music again as she performed alone.

The rest of us had to stand in the back of the room as we watched the Ziegler girl perform the routine almost flawlessly. After that, Abby proceeded to continue talking about Maddie. "So, Maddie, are you free on Sunday?"

What kind of--

The girl nodded.

"And do you think your mom would mind if you joined me for the Tonys?" The woman questioned and Maddie gasped.

"Yes!" She exclaimed immediately. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

That's how we all watched the two of them hug in excitement. When they pulled away, Abby just so happened to look at me at that exact moment. "I would've invited you, but you've already gone the past two years in a row." She shrugged as a smirk came onto her face. "Gotta give someone else a chance, right?"

I simply stared at her without showing any emotion at all.

She really had it out for me and never got tired of rubbing everything all over my face. I wonder, if I told her about the music video I did, would she get excited for me? Correction: Do I even want her to know anymore?

It's not even like I wanted to go. I'm happy that Maddie gets to go, but wouldn't it make more sense if she asked her somewhere where the rest didn't see it happen in front of their own eyes? I mean, how fair is that for them?

She looked like she was about to say something else, but luckily, a loud noise filled the room and we all turned to look at the door as Tami and James rolled the huge drum prop for us to rehearse with it. Abby walked over to them all excited about having the prop and I felt Maddie's hand on my left shoulder.

We then went back to rehearsing, but after only rehearsing it halfway through, Abby stormed out of the room and both Gianna and James had to take over to clean it. Around an hour later, she came back and started working with the remaining numbers. After going over Sarah's solo one more time, she started working with Kenzie. While she did that, Tea', Sarah, Maddie, and I all sat in the back of the room, watching the recently turned ten-year-old learn her much more mature routine.

"Mads," Sarah spoke up as we watched the girl. Maddie hummed in response, her eyes not leaving her younger sister at any moment. "Are you going to dance this weekend? Like, your solo?"

"Why?" Maddie questioned, still not tearing away.

"Gianna was talking about the official listing and your name is there," Sarah explained. "So you'd be competing against Kenzie."

"And Ava." Tea' added. "And Evie. And me."

"Basically everyone," Sarah concluded and Maddie turned her head in her direction.

"Abby told me to take a costume, but I really think I'm going to perform," Maddie answered, looking slightly guilty. "I feel kinda bad because this is supposed to be your week." She motioned over at Tea'. "And also Kenzie's. I mean, it's literally her birthday week."

"Yeah, but Evie's gone up against you before." Tea' looked over at me. "Right?"

I nodded in response and Sarah spoke again. "She's beat her multiple times."

"It's gonna be good competition," Maddie admitted. "I just hope we can all beat Ava."

The three of them stopped talking and I stopped watching Kenzie for a moment. That was the moment I realized they were all looking at me as if they were expecting an answer.

I cleared my throat. "I think we can all beat her. I mean, Mads and I have already beat her with the duet, so with solos, it should be that much easier." I looked back at Kenzie. "Besides, I think Kenzie's definitely gonna give her a run for her money."

"I just hope I can do well, too." Tea' admitted. "I like musical theatre, but I don't think it's the best to show that I should dance at nationals."

"Musical theatre is always the wild card." I looked back at the redhead. "But if she gave it to you, it means that she trusts you enough."

Or that she's setting you up, but that's a whole other thing.

When they started working with Tea's solo, it remembered me of Paige, which I didn't know if it was either good or bad, but she looked like she was having fun doing it. Kenzie's routine was definitely more mature than Tea's, but they were both good competition with each other.

Then, Maddie rehearsed her "Happiness" solo for this weekend. She only ran through it two times before Abby dismissed her. The teacher stood up from the prop and turned to look at all of us. "All right, Evie, let's work with yours. The rest--" She pointed over at the den's door with her right hand's thumb. "You're dismissed. I'm not going to work with the group anymore today, so you're all done."

My blood went cold and I looked up at her.

She wanted me to be alone with her..?

I mean, the viewing room is right there, so the moms can see-- What about the time she made me throw up right there?

Sarah, Tea', and Kenzie all left for the dancer's den together, but Maddie didn't move. As soon as she finished rehearsing her routine, she sat down next to me, and she hadn't even budged when Abby dismissed all four of them.

"We gotta start working." Abby turned back to look at me, but she instantly took notice of Maddie. "I already dismissed you, Maddie."

"I'm okay here." Maddie quickly said. "Thank you."

"But you can't stay here." She insisted.

"Why?" The girl asked in a curious tone.

"You'll distract Evie," Abby told her.

"I don't think I will." Maddie turned to look at me. "Or am I?"

I looked up to the viewing room, and even if there weren't any cameras around the mothers, they were talking about something.

That's when it hit me and I turned back to the teacher. "She isn't bothering