third person
all of the teenagers were walking through a beautiful forest with a small river running next to them

it was beginning to get dark when Teddy spoke
"man! that was the all time train dodge too cool!"

"Vern you were so scared! You looked That fat guy Abbott Costello when he saw the mummy!" Teddy exclaims

"I wasn't that scared!" Vern says twisting his marshmallow on a stick around and around the site

"Vern!" they all said in sync

"No really! I wasn't sincerely!" Vern explains

"Okay! So you won't mind if we check your jockeys for Hershey squirts!" Gordie says laughing

"Go screw!" Vern shouts

"You better turn yours over Vern" Chris explains

"This is the way I like to do it!" Vern says

Then it fell off into the fire

"Awh man!" Vern shouted

All of the teenagers began to laugh

"You got anymore Gordie??" Vern asks still annoyed

"No sorry man," Gordie says laughing

"It's not funny what am I supposed to eat!" Vern shouts

"Vern just eat mine" Katie said handing Vern her marshmallow

"No Katie-" Gordie says before getting cut off by Katie

"No honestly if it's that much of a problem have mine!"

Then Vern was still picking at the fire trying to find his burnt marshmallow

"Why don't you cook your dick!" Teddy says laughing then Chris added on

"It would be a small meal!"

"Aha! Screw you guys I got it!" Vern says pulling out a dark black marshmallow

"Surely that's not edible Vern..." Katie says slowly

"No! Nun-uh! This is the way I eat it" Vern explains

Small time skip
They all sat around the campfire Sarah had Chris led along her legs almost asleep

Katie was squished between Teddy and Vern

Teddy had his arm wrapped around Katie's shoulder slightly suffocating her

Gordie was just sat in-between teddy and Chris

They all sat having a cigarette except for the girls

"Nothin' like a smoke after a meal!" Vern explains

"Yeah!" teddy agrees

"I cherish these moments" he says putting the cigarette back in his mouth

Then Chris slightly laughed at teddy's comment

"What? What did I say?" Teddy asks confusingly

"Hey asshole smoking kills" Katie says pulling the cigarette out of teddy's mouth

"Hey!" he says trying to reach back for the cigarette

"Shes not wrong teddy," Chris says still smoking

Teddy just looked at the ground sadly

"Hey, Gordo! Why don't you tell us a story!" Chris says

"Ehh I don't know..." Gordie says slowly

"Oh come on! Katie and Sar haven't ever heard one of your stories!" Chris says

"Yeah come on gordie! But no horror stories ok? No horror stories I'm not up for that man!" Vern states

"Tell us that one about sergeant steel!And his battling leathernecks" Teddy says pointing his cigarette

"I've been thinking about something else lately, it's about this pie-eating contest and the main gut is this loser fat kid named davy Hogan!" Gordie explains

"What like Charlie Hogan?" Katie asked

"Good one Katie. Go on Vern" Chris says

"This kid. He's our age but he's fat like real fat! He weighs close to 180 but you know it's not his fault. It's his glands" Gordie explains

"Yeah! My cousins like that! Sincerely she weighs over 300 pounds it's her hiboy gland or something I don't know about any hiboy gland but what a blimp! No shit she looks like a thanksgiving turkey! And you know this one time--" Vern says before getting cut off by Chris

"Shut up Vern"

"Yeah yeah right go on Gordie!" Vern says

"Well all the kids instead of calling him davy they called him lardass. Lardass Hogan, even his brother and sister called him lardass and at school they put a 'wide load' sticker on his back! And they rank him out and beat him up whenever they have the chance but one day he gets an idea! The greatest revenge a kid has ever had!" gordie says putting his cigarette back in his mouth

In the story
"This thing on? Can you hear me?" the host shouted tapping into the microphone

"Now the next contestant in the great tri-county pie eat... Principal John Wiggins!" he shouted pointing at principal John Wiggins joining the stage

Then everybody clapped

"And our celebrity contestant from klam in Portland the boss man himself! Bob cormier!" he shouted pointing at the contestant joining the stage

The crowd was filled with claps from many people all over America

"Hey from the racks and stacks it's the best on wax! How about another double golden oldie twin spin sound? From K.L.A.M in Portland, it's... The boss!" another man shouted into the microphone

Then once again the crowd was filled with claps

"Next! A newcomer to the pie eating! But one we expect great things from in the future! Young master David Hogan!" the host said pointing at davy Hogan

Then Davy Hogan began walking up the steps to the stage when a tall man put his shoe out and tripped him up

The crowd was filled with laughter and "oooo"s

"Are you alright young man?" the man that tripped him asked

"Hey lardass how was your trip!" a man from the audience shouted

"I heard you got a big appetite lardass don't even think about winning this" the man whispered

Then davy began standing up to get onto the stage

Then someone from the audience spoke

"Boy, are you fat!"

"Don't pay any attention to those fools lardass- I mean h-davy!" the host said laughing

Then one group from the audience spoke again

"Boom bah boom bah!"

Then davy sat down into his seat angrily

"And now! The one you've all been waiting for! The four-time champion bill Travis!" the host shouted

Then a man came running onto the stage quickly the crowd was filled with claps and smiles

"Listen I got 10 riding on you myself billy boy!" the host whispered into his ear

Then he sat down

"Alright are you ready! Hands behind your backs ladies and gentlemen" the host announced

"Drumroll!"

"Hey larddass! Chow down wide load!" The twin brothers shouted

"Haha- GO!" the host shouted

Then the band began to play whilst everybody in the competition smashed their faces into the blueberry pies

A few seconds later davy shouted

"Done!"

Then another pie was placed underneath him causing him to stuff his face into the pie almost immediately

Another few seconds later he shouted again

"Done!"

Then once again another pie was placed underneath him causing him to eat it at a fast speed

Then almost immediately after it was placed under him he spoke again

"Done!"

"You better pace yourself if you wanna hold out" the host said to davy

"Come on lardass!" people shouted in the audience

Back to gordie telling the story

"What the audience didn't know is that lardass wasn't really interested in winning what he wanted was revenge and right before he was introduced he had gotten ready for it!" Gordie explains

Back to story
Davy had drunken a full bottle of caster oil as if it was water

He had swallowed a raw egg

Back to gordie telling the story

"Diving into his fifth pie lardass imagined he wasn't eating pies he pretended he was eating rat guts in the blueberry sauce! Slowly a sound started to build up in his stomach a strange and scary sound. A sound like a truck approaching at 100 miles an hour suddenly lardass opened his mouth and before bill Travis knew it he was covered in five pies worth of used blueberries! The women in the audience screamed boss man bob Cormier took one look at Bill Travis and barfed on Principal Wiggins. Principal Wiggins barfed on the lumberjack next to him mayor grungy barfed on his wife's tits! But when the smell hit the crowd... that's when lardass' plan really started to work... Girlfriends barfed on boyfriends kids barfed on their parents a fat last barfed in her purse the Donnelley twins barfed on each other! The women auxiliary barfed all over the benevolent order of antelopes and lardass just sat back and enjoyed what he created... A complete and total barfarama! " Gordie said finally finishing his story

"Yay!" all of the boys said

"Too cool!" Teddy said laughing

"That was the best! Just the best!" Chris explains

Then Teddy asked "then what happened?"

"What do you mean?" Gordie asked

"I mean... What happens next?" Teddy asked

"What do you mean what happened that's the end" Gordie explained

"How can that be the ending! What kind of ending is that! What happens to lardass" teddy asks

"I don't know..?" Gordie exclaims
"Maybe they went home and celebrated with a couple of cheeseburgers!"

"Jeez! That ending sucks why don't you make it so that lardass goes home and shoots his father then runs away and joins the texas rangers how about that!" Teddy  says

"Ehh I don't know..." Gordie says slowly

"Something good like that! Right Katie?" Teddy asked Katie

"Uhh... I liked the ending!" Katie says

"Yeah me too! But there's one thing I don't understand... Did lardass have to pay to get into the competition...?" Vern asks

"No Vern... They just let him in..." Gordie explains

"oh oh! great story!" Vern says smiling

"Yeah it's a great story gordie I just didn't like the ending!" Teddy says getting up