You're an educated, literate person. Whenever you meet someone at a cocktail party, you're perfectly capable of chatting about NPR, kale, John Stewart, and the latest Margaret Atwood. How fortunate that person doesn't ride the 8:13 train into the city with you, so they don't see you giggling at the Howard Stern podcast and flipping through "The 100 Funniest Fart Jokes In History."

1. Twilight

2. New Moon (Stephanie Meyer)

3. Eclipse

 4. Breaking Dawn

5. Flowers in the Attic

6. Petals on the Wind (V.C. Andrews)

7. Fifty Shades of Grey

8. The Da Vinci Code

9. Angels and Demons

10. The Notebook

11. A Walk to Remember

12. Nights in Rodanthe

13. Valley of the Dolls

14. The Love Machine

15. Once Is Not Enough

16. Peyton Place (Grace Metalious)

17. A Million Little Pieces (James Frey) 

18. Forever

19. Princess Daisy

20. Scruples

21. The Stud

22. The Bitch 

23. Gossip Girl

24. No One Here Gets Out Alive (By Jerry Hopkins and Danny Sugerman)

25. Up and Down With the Rolling Stones

26. Justin Bieber: First Step 2 Forever: My Story 

27. The Manhood Ceremony (Ross Berliner)

28. Chariots of the Gods

29. Place at the Table: The Gay Individual in Modern Society (Bruce Bawer)

30. The Sensuous Man (M)

31. The Sensuous Woman (J) 

32. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

33. Go Ask Alice (Anonymous)

34. Jay's Journal

35. And I Don't Want to Live This Life: A Mother's Story of Her Daughter's Murder (Deborah Spungen)

36. The Amityville Horror (Jay Anson)

37. The Closing of the American Mind

38. The Fitzgeralds and the Kennedys (Doris Kearns Goodwin)

39. Left Behind

40. The Rising: Before They Were Left Behind (Tim Lahaye)

41. The Remnant (Timothy Lahaye)

42. Kingdom Come

43. The Lives of John Lennon (Albert Goldman)

44. Living History

45. My Life (Bill Clinton)

46. The Celestine Prophecy

47. The Purpose Driven Life (Rick Warren)

48. Illusions (Richard Bach)

49. Jonathan Livingston Seagull (Richard Bach)

50. Growing Up Duggar (Various)

51. If I Did It (O.J. Simpson)

52. Hammer of the Gods (Stephen Davis)

53. Mommie Dearest (Christina Crawford)

54. Love Can Build a Bridge (Judds)

55. Blue Smoke

56. The Partner (John Grisham)

57. The Firm (Tennessee)

58. The Secret

59. Debt of Honor (Clancy)

60. No Greater Love (Danielle Steel)

61. The Other Side of Midnight (Sidney Sheldon)

62. The Gift (Danielle Steel)

63. Out in a Lamb (Shirley Maclaine)

64. Dancing in the Light (Shirley Maclaine) 

65. The Late, Great Planet Earth 

66. The 1980s: Countdown to Armageddon 

67. Satan is Alive and Well on Planet Earth (Hal Lindsey)

68. The Plague of the Black Debt: How to Survive the Coming Depression

69. Trump: The Art of the Deal (Donald Trump)

70. Bush at War (Bob Woodward)