Dark humor jokes
Warning! These jokes can be very dark and messed up. Some can considered inappropriate. If you're not into that kind of stuff, please don't read this. Note: I don't own all the jokes. Some I made up, others I read.…
Warning! These jokes can be very dark and messed up. Some can considered inappropriate. If you're not into that kind of stuff, please don't read this. Note: I don't own all the jokes. Some I made up, others I read.…
SOON TO BE PUBLISHED BY W BY WATTPAD BOOKS!Grace wants to prove herself by making the men's hockey team at her new school. Will a rivalry with the captain - or an attraction between them - get in the way? ***** When Grace Gillman moves to California, she's determined to play hockey -- even if that means making a place for herself on her new school's only team. But Sebastian Evans doesn't want a girl on the men's team, even if she's a great player. He's convinced she'll distract the other boys and cost them their shot at the championship - and with it, his only chance at a scholarship to his dream college. But despite his icy attitude towards her, he can't help but feel a connection building between them - which quickly gets complicated when he learns she has eyes for someone else. Will they remain rivals on the rink, or will things heat up between them?[[word count: 100,000-150,000 words]]…
"So, let me get this straight. You stomped all over his paperwork?" She started. "Not intentionally, but yes," I confirmed it. "Threw a drink in his face?" She added. "Expensive red wine." I described. "Rammed into his car with yours deliberately?" she counted on her third finger. "Um...I'm not proud of that one," I said cringing. "And called him offensive names?" She ended the list and I winced. "Twice." I specified. "And you're still alive?" She blinked, looking genuinely surprised. "Geez, don't be dramatic or anything..." I frowned at her hyperbolic statement. "Maybe he's keeping you around to get revenge." She suggested. Possible. I wouldn't put it past him."I didn't know alright!" I exclaimed. "Let's hope that excuse is acceptable.." She was merely amused. "Working with my new boss is going to be a piece of work." **Synopsis: When the CEO of Signature Heights: Jensen Black, and a stubborn employee: Alexandra Brook, clash, it's a battle of wits & a war of perseverance. They are both dead set on making each other's lives hell, but when the story progresses they just might learn that first impressions could be deceiving. As circumstances reveal their true selves and opinions change, things could get complicated especially when suddenly feelings get involved. Who would be the first to concede?Maybe it's not that simple to forgive your archnemesis and maybe it'll result in some hilarious consequences... **Book 1 of a two-part series (completed).High Rankings: # Funny, # Humor, # Comedy, # Romance, #BillionaireAmazing book, I adore your writing style, and I really enjoyed these characters and story -ReaderFantastic story, believably flawed characters and deft humour makes for a very engaging read, I could barely put it down to feed my children -Reader **…
Highest ranking - #1 in Humor (24/12/2017) She is fire, he is an extinguisher. Both of them together personify craziness. Its a story of two best friends who are together since childhood and support each other in everything they do. What will happen when someone else comes to their life. Give it a shot. Cover credits - @The_shining_armor…
How two peaceful families get shattered by a revelation. Why families are considered of those who share blood and not those who share emotions. Two people are caught in the labyrinth of emotions.Plagiarism is crime.This work and Idea belons to me.…
They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot)P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution.(cover by @glueeater)…
This is just a filler sorry for not updating my other story but I've been really busy with school and practice.…
A book of dark jokes for those who bear the darkest souls.…
Jessie Cross is a typical bad boy with the title. He loves cars and racing and is basically an adrenaline addict. He loves tattoos, music, the women. His friends and him hung out at this one bar often but this particular brunette who appeared uncomfortable caught his eye. Sailor Kate was the pretty girl who drowned herself in books- romance addict- and she was too lonely to leave her awful friends.One night they dragged her to a car race and she sat alone by her car, bored out of her mind. When a man came up to her she became uncomfortable but didn't know how to wave him off until a boy did it for her. How do they proceed after?…
Abe Barrett is surrounded by ghosts - some of them are even his roommates! But now Abe's visions show something dark coming, and it wants Abe dead. ***** When Abe Barrett's family died, he started seeing ghosts. Soon he was living with three of them, and it turns out ghosts are just as eccentric as people. Abe is bothered by the ghosts constantly since he doesn't want to solve their murders, avenge them or do much of anything. He just wants to do his job and relax. His dreams, however, have been getting darker as people in town start to disappear. Soon Abe realizes there is something hunting him, and that same threat was involved with his family's deaths. A legacy of darkness is chasing Abe Barrett, and his supernatural roommates may not be enough to save him.[[word count: 60,000-70,000 words]]…
Funny screenshots, skits, and things people have said in real life that made me cackle :)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~#69 in #laugh (April 25, 2025)…
Highest Rank: #1 in Romance, #2 in HumorWhat happens when you're walking down the street, with one of the best coffees in hand, turn around for one second... Then the next thing you know, the world is spinning and you've landed in the arms of one of the most gorgeous organisms of the male species. With the best coffee, you've ever had, spilt on his grey v-neck?Or maybe when you're drunk off your head, can't walk in a straight line with a heel that is broken and your makeup smudged with a bottle of beer in your hand...Then the next thing you know the world is spinning and that same gorgeous organism has you in his arms with the strong smell of your beer on his leather jacket?When it comes to Ryan Einstein, Alexis Harrington needs a little help. Especially when her only instinct is to say..."Shit! I'm sorry!"© All Rights Reserved 2018 Camerybear…
basically if tbp characters had a group chat but its like based in 2022 does that make sense?finney: finsarmrobin: robinsbandanabruce: mintymanvance: pinballvancebilly: newsboygriffin: invisiblegriffingwen: gwengremlinthe grabber:dumbfuckingfartnocker…
#Book 1#3 in humor on 13.5.18#33 in romance on 03.04.17Started on : 5th december 2015Ended on: 14th february 2017Teresa Scarlet is witty, pretty and very very rich. Thanks to her dad she has lots of money but our protagonist wants love, not money. Unfortunately she's getting married to a rich boy who doesn't even look at her properly and before their engagement he announces their marriage as a contract?! What else? He's cold, rude, arrogant and a big jerk who on the very next day of their marriage throws her out of his car in the midnight in the middle of nowhere?!***Ryouma Carlton, young business man,rich, handsome and a totally perfect guy. His family moved to the States, when he was 12, and now they're back to their homeland. But as soon as they returned, his world came crashing down when his parents blackmailed him to get married with a girl he met just few days ago. WHAT?When he married her,he thought he's got a submissive wife but he is in for a surprise!Join on the ride filled with love, hatred and lots of humor!…
Geoff and Naomi are dead, and they're depressed, but when Geoff's cat Bernie dies as well, they embark on a wild journey to find it in the underworld. ***** When Geoff dies, alongside his girlfriend Naomi, they end up sharing an apartment in the Underworld as skeletons. But after a few years, Geoff starts suffering a mid-death crisis. What's the purpose of going through the motions as a skeleton if you can't really live? Then he gets word that his cat, Bernie, just died and he can collect him and bring him home! Geoff and Naomi hurry to get Bernie only to discover that, due to a clerical error, their cat has been lost. With the hunt for Bernie giving new purpose to Geoff's un-life, he and Naomi begin a quest to get back their cat. Battling skeleton pirates, climbing the sky ladder and facing off against the villain who took Bernie, Geoff is determined to find his purpose - or die a second time trying![[2018 Wattys Winner - The Originals]][[word count: 30,000-40,000 words]]…
this is so cringe.…
A story in which a girl falls in love with a sociopath.Highest ranks: #1 in Teen Fiction, #1 in Humor, #12 in New Adult, #26 in Romance.…
#1 in humor on 24.01.2018Picture this-You are a huge fan of a singer from your favourite band. Your day starts looking at his picture on the wall of the bedroom and ends with the same.One day you are standing near the window of your room and what you see next makes you freeze....You see your favourite singer ,your crush standing with a mug of coffee in his hand on the window of the room opposite to your bedroom.Dream come true, right?'Chashmish' is what he calls her. 'Rockstar' is what he prefers. What happens when two completely different worlds collide?Sparks?Explosion?ORLove with a solid taste of humor. Come fall in love with our crazy malhotra and his Fangirl❤--------*CONTAINS HINDI DIALOGUES*…
Noah Matthew has personal problems with family and goes to therapy to attend those issues. Hockey has been his outlet since he was a young child. Him and his hockey team will be traveling to meet figure skaters who may teach them some ideas of speed and grace to maybe apply them to hockey. At least that's what their coach hopes. As each player gets an observation day for who they may pick Noah has his eyes on a beautiful blonde. She was graceful and poise and something the others seemed to lack. She spent the day showing demonstrations as the other skaters and hockey players observed. They all had their eyes somewhere but Noah only saw Maya. As they work together for three weeks, helping each other learn skills Noah can't help but fall for the girl. Maya is in awe of Noah but is it enough to strike anything?…
(n.) the journey of changing one's mind, heart, self, or way of life.…
Alexandra "Alex" Doherty is the girl everyone envies. She's well liked, is the captain of the soccer team, has a great group of friends, her boyfriend is the most sought after athlete in school. Her life is deemed perfect by everyone around her.Only she's hiding a secret. And it only takes new girl Mackenzie Daniels to join her school for the secret to come tumbling out.…
Voldemort has succeeded into stealing the legendary Philosopher's Stone, however, not everything is how it seems.Original FanFiction located at:https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11330784/1/Harry-Potter-and-the-Sympathy-of-SoulsOriginal Writer:https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2220074/MorticiaYouSpokeFrench…