The next morning at school Ella hung around by her locker until the last possible second before the bell rang, but there was no sign of Bucky. Maybe he's running late. It was the first day in weeks that they hadn't met up there. She sat through homeroom, counting down the minutes until first period when she thought she would see him.
She was wrong.
His desk was empty. He didn't show. Would he skip school to avoid me? Her stomach knotted as she thought about whether he'd go such an extreme. She blinked hard, trying to focus on the lesson. She flipped her pen in her fingers. It clattered onto the desk when she dropped it, and she didn't bother picking it back up. Her empty page stayed blank. Maybe he doesn't want to see me. Wanda poked her arm. She ignored it.
When the bell rang at the end of the period she hurriedly gathered her books and pencil case, not bothering to pack them into her bag. She left the class and snuck into the bathroom before Nat and Wanda could see where she'd gone. She dropped everything in her arms next to the sink and locked herself in a stall. She pressed her back up against the door.
She called him. No answer. He's avoiding me.
"He's probably off sick," Nat reasoned as they walked to their next class. Ella knew it was the most obvious explanation but it did nothing to ease her doubts.
Every lesson seemed to go on for an excruciatingly long time. Like time had slowed down just to torture her. She rang him again at lunch with the same result. No answer. She felt nauseous. At lunch, she sat in the cafeteria bouncing her knee, not eating. She asked if anyone else had heard from him. They hadn't.
When the last lesson of the day finished she called him again, losing her last shred of hope when he didn't answer for the third time. She found Steve in the corridor, chatting away to someone she vaguely knew. She interrupted his conversation, just needing to get out of the bustling corridor as quickly as she could. The voices around her were making her dizzy. He doesn't want to see me.
"I'm skipping practice tonight. I'll walk, you can have the car," she said, dropping the keys into his hand. She had planned to go and see Christian after swim practice, but she could only think about Bucky. His house was on her way home, she found herself heading there instead.
She took a wrong turn, it took her a minute to notice, she was so consumed with worry she wasn't concentrating on where she was walking. She realized she'd crossed several roads without being at all aware, but she made it there unharmed eventually. She stood outside his front door, his car was the only one on the driveway. Her phone started vibrating in her pocket. She had half a mind to ignore it, it was probably Christian. But she pulled it out to check. Bucky. Her head dropped back in relief as she sighed. The weight on her shoulders dissipated.
"Hey, Ella," his voice was weak. He sounded sick. I was worried for nothing.
"Hey, Bucky," she replied, not wanting to sound too happy to hear from him given how rough he seemed to be feeling.
"Sorry I missed your calls, was something wrong?" He was exhausted, but he still managed to muster up enough energy to sound worried.
Ella shook her head, forgetting that he couldn't see her, "no, I just...I'm sorry...I thought maybe you were avoiding me."
He panicked, "no Ella, of course not, I'm just sick, I've been asleep most of the day."
She paused, considering whether to just leave, but she missed him. A lot.
"Bucky, this is going to sound strange, but I'm outside your front door."
He coughed, choking on air, and hung up the phone. The next few seconds seemed to last longer than they should have. But eventually, the front door opened to reveal Bucky. He was in a t-shirt and joggers, his usually well-groomed hair was a tousled mess and he looked pale, as though he hadn't seen the sun in years.
She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him.
"Don't, you'll catch whatever I have," he half-heartedly mumbled into her hair, hugging her back.
Ella felt bad for doubting him, for thinking he could be so cold as to intentionally ignore her or avoid seeing her.
"I'm sorry," she muttered back, not letting him go. Her hand drifted across his back, feeling the ripples of his muscles. "I was really worried that you meant what you said on Saturday night."
He placed his hand on her cheek, brushing his fingers through her hair.
"Not a chance," he laughed. It sounded strained. She finally let him go.
"I can go if you need to go back to bed?" She suggested, suddenly feeling guilty for disturbing him, for turning up uninvited.
"No, I'm really glad you came. Do you want to come in, we can put on a movie or something?"
Ella nodded, turning round to close the front door behind her and following him into the living room. The curtains were all drawn, what she assumed was Bucky's quilt was on the armchair. Bucky dropped down onto the couch, Ella sat next to him. His skin was cold, she pressed her leg up against his.
"Do you feel like you're going to throw up?" She asked before the movie started.
"Nah, it's been a couple of hours, I think I'm done for the day."
"Do you want something to eat or drink then?" She offered.
He smiled, "aren't I supposed to be the one asking you that?"
Ella shook her head, getting up to get herself a drink, she looked at Bucky and pointed through the door.
"This way?"
He nodded in affirmation, "a glass of water would be great," he added.
When Ella came back into the room she handed him one of the glasses and pulled the quilt off the chair, throwing it over him, before sitting back down. She let herself lean up against him, laying her head on his shoulder. Bucky's arm found its way around her. He resisted the urge to kiss her. The side of her head was inches from his lips, her temple was practically inviting him. Instead, his fingers found their way into her hair, he absentmindedly played with a strand of it. They stayed like that until the movie finished.
"I should go," Ella whispered, not wanting to disturb the quiet that had settled in once the credits had rolled through. Bucky's arm momentarily tightened around her, pulling her into his side in a hug.
"Thank you for coming," he said. "I hope you know I wouldn't ignore you"
Ella nodded. She knew. She had known all day really, she'd just let anxiousness get the better of her. She stroked her thumb across his cheek and ran a finger along his jawline. She'd wanted to do that for a long time.
"Let me know how you feel tomorrow," she smiled as she stood up. Bucky walked her to the front door, allowing himself to give her an innocent peck on the cheek as they said goodbye.
Ella went home, it was freezing and she deeply regretted not taking a coat to school. The wind bit at her nose as she walked. It was almost dark by the time she got home, she hoped her parents wouldn't notice her getting back so late. She didn't want questions from them or Steve.
She dished herself a plate of the leftover spaghetti and meatballs sitting out on the kitchen counter. As she reheated it Steve came downstairs. Despite her best efforts to be quiet, he'd somehow been alerted to her coming home.
He raised a questioning eyebrow, "have you been with Christian?"
"Bucky," she corrected.
She couldn't read his expression. Maybe he was disappointed, maybe he was concerned. Her eyes searched his for an answer.
"Not my business." He shrugged. "Just don't do anything stupid."
She resisted the urge to get annoyed at him. She knew what he was inferring, and maybe a month ago she'd have been furious that he could think that she would be capable of that. But now it was taking a serious amount of strength not to act on her thoughts about Bucky, and maybe it was a little less far fetched.
She took her dinner up to her room, not gracing Steve with a reply. She ate and went straight to bed. Every second she was awake she was fighting the urge to call Christian and end it. But she knew it wouldn't be fair to do it over the phone. She owed him that much. Tomorrow, she thought to herself. No excuses.
Tomorrow rolled around. Bucky texted her early in the morning.
I barely slept last night so won't be coming to school today. Hopefully see you tomorrow
Ella pouted at her phone. She had half a mind to call round after school again, but she knew seeing Christian was the priority. Once it was done, she could see Bucky as much as she liked.
She chatted with Nat and Wanda before class started, making sure they kept their distance from Christian. Blindsiding him first thing in the morning wouldn't be right and she wouldn't be able to pretend everything was normal if she saw him.
Unfortunately, they had a class together second period, but they were doing an experiment that kept them too busy to have much time to talk, so she made it through by feigning a smile whenever he spoke to her and keeping her replies as short as possible.
At lunch, Christian waved her over to sit with him and his friends, seemingly not at all perturbed by her quietness during class. She had pointed to the table where Sam and Nat were already sitting and gave him an apologetic smile in response to his offer. His eyes were boring into her while she ate, so she disappeared off to the library, she had work to do anyway.
At the end of the day, she waited by Christian's locker. It was time.
"Hey." He smiled.
"Hey." She didn't smile back.
You are reading the story above: TeenFic.Net