October 17th

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The next morning, Bucky's words were heavy on her mind. Sure last night they'd laughed them off, but they weren't meant to be a joke. He was willing to distance himself for the sake of her relationship. She appreciated it, but the problem was, she didn't want him to have meant what he said. She didn't want to not see him. That fact alone was pushing her ever closer to a decision. It had barely been two months since she'd met him, but she spoke to him almost every day since he appeared at her house after swim practice. Even on weekends, she found herself texting him, and every time he replied she caught herself smiling down at her phone. He was addictive. Without ever meaning to, he left her wanting more. Except now, more meant more than what friendship alone could offer.

She knew what the solution to that particular problem was. End it with Christian, sooner rather than later. But that brought up its own set of problems.

Ella decided it was time to call in support, she needed to talk this out, she'd always been like that. Actually discussing her problems always got her to a resolution quicker than thinking things over alone.

Nat and Wanda had stayed over the night before, so she dragged them into her room. She thought about just talking it over with Wanda later, there was a good chance she wasn't quite ready for Nat's blunt honesty, but in the end she decided she needed Nat too. The three of them laid shoulder to shoulder on Ella's bed, squeezed together on top of the blue paisley sheets. It was like having the angel and the devil sitting on her shoulders.

She gave them a briefing.

"I just need to figure out how I feel about Christian, away from Bucky. So you have permission to be completely honest," she shot Nat a pointed look, "just don't be mean."

Her two friends nodded in understanding, and Nat dived straight in. She finally had the green light she'd been waiting for.

"You know what I'm going to say first, he's boring Ella. He bores you, don't deny it. I mean tell me when you've ever seen a high school relationship where someone is bored. You're like the only person to ever have this problem, I swear. High school relationships are all emotion, first loves and heartbreaks, and yet you look like you've been married twenty years."

"I agree, but he was there for you through all the hardest bits over the last few years, so it makes sense why your relationship isn't as light and fun, and it doesn't mean it won't change if you try. Maybe you'd be giving up too quickly," Wanda countered.

"It's nearly been two years Wanda, this wouldn't exactly count as making a rash decision. I mean, I know Bucky changed things, and we probably wouldn't be having this conversation yet if it weren't for him. But take him out of the equation, you still know Christian isn't right for you anymore. You're not the same person as you were in freshman year when you got with him. You're more fun and carefree, and I just think no matter how hard you try with Christian, he'll never be like that."

Nat and Ella looked to Wanda for her response.

"I'm sorry, Ella. But I agree with Nat. I just think Christian will end up holding you back. He's great, he is, he's been so supportive, but you just don't need that anymore. You need something else entirely."

The three of them let quiet sink in, Ella thinking their words over. Sometimes she couldn't believe just how lucky she was to have friends like Nat and Wanda.

"I love you guys," she smiled. "And I just want to say thank you. It's been really hard since Laura...me and Steve couldn't have got through it without you."

Wanda leant her head on Ella's shoulder as she spoke, "we love you too."

"Okay, it's breakfast time, I'm starving," Ella announced as she sat up before her stomach made a perfectly timed growl.

The three of them made their way downstairs and joined Steve in the kitchen. Ella made them all toast and coffee. She zoned out of the conversation, she knew she didn't need her friends to voice their opinions to figure out what the answer was. But it was like a little like a pep talk, getting her ready for what she knew was coming next. She had finally acknowledged that she and Christian weren't right together. They didn't have any real common ground, she actively avoided discussing their future and he didn't make her happy.

The only problem was, she seemed to make him happy. Ending it with him was going to hurt him. She wasn't sure she had it in her and that had been the problem all along. But, she reminded herself, it was just a matter of time. At least doing it now would be slightly easier than a year and a half down the line before they went off to college.

She was brought out of her thoughts by Steve.

"Earth to Ella," he joked.

She looked up, a guilty smile on her face, "sorry, just thinking."

"I know, I could practically see the cogs turning."

Ella rolled her eyes, her way of telling him to leave the topic well alone.

"What's the plan today then guys?" She asked.

Nat grinned, "I'm feeling burgers."

Wanda and Steve nodded in agreement. It had been a while since they'd all been out for food.

"I'll text Sam and Bucky," Steve said, pulling out his phone.

"No!" Ella jumped up, "just Sam," she clarified.

Steve looked lost, "did something happen last night?"

His tone was worried, the protective brother inside him showing.

Ella didn't know how to talk her way out of this one, but she needed to. Bucky had said that they should spend less time together, and until Ella had spoken to Christian, she knew it was the right thing to do. She and Bucky had been flirting with the line between right and wrong for weeks already, it wasn't going to be long before they crossed it entirely if they spent any more time together. Plus, she didn't want to have to hold back around him any longer. Every time she had an inappropriate thought about him she came closer to acting on it.

"Nothing happened," Ella finally reassured. "I just..."

And then something happened that Ella didn't see coming. 

"You need a bit of space from him, right?" He interrupted, eyebrow raised, a smirk on his lips.

She nodded, in shock that Steve was seemingly included in the list of people who had noticed her feelings towards Bucky. Or maybe the other way round. She couldn't be sure.

"Just a few days," she replied when she'd recovered.

Steve filled in the blank, "so Christian..."

"Is soon to be no longer," Nat finished for him, trying and failing to hide her smile.

The four of them collected Sam and headed out for lunch. There were only a handful of good restaurants in town, luckily one did what Ella was convinced were the world's best burgers. They all squeezed into a booth, Ella drew the short straw and ended up squashed between Sam and Steve. When the food came she could barely move her arms enough to eat.

They all piled their plates up when they were done and got down to business. Halloween. Ella's favorite holiday. She was a sucker for a good costume party and luckily someone was throwing a big one this year.

"Friends?" Wanda suggested, "we have enough guys if we get Bucky involved."

Nat snorted, "what and have one of them wear Ross' leather trousers? I don't think so."

All of them laughed at that image, trying to work out who would look worst. Definitely Steve.

"Scooby-Doo?" Came the next suggestion from Sam.

"Nope, I'm not fighting these guys over who gets to be Velma and Daphne," Ella countered.

"Yeah, cause you'd lose and end up having to be the Mystery Machine," Nat joked.

Wanda chimed in, "okay, I know I say this every year, but please can we do Mean Girls?"

"Santa outfits or all pink?" Ella asked, she was only okay with one of those options.

"I wouldn't mind seeing you guys in the Santa outfits," Sam flirted, earning a joking smack around the head from Ella.

"I'd be down for the all pink looks, means I don't need to go out and buy anything." Nat shrugged. Ella nodded in agreement, knowing she'd more than likely have to raid her friends' wardrobes.

"Loving the enthusiasm guys," Wanda said with an eye roll.

"I guess that means we're off the hook then," Steve smiled, he didn't share his twin's passion for Halloween.

Ella shook her head, "no chance, you need to come up with something between yourselves."

With that, they all put cash down for the bill and left the diner. They all piled into the car, Steve had been driving for a few minutes when they noticed they weren't heading home.

"Uh...Steve?" Sam asked vaguely.

"Yeah, I just didn't feel like going back yet, thought we could go to the lake?"

Ella smiled, they hadn't been there in months, even if it was cold out it would make a nice afternoon. The drive was beautiful, fall was in full swing and the leaves on the trees were stunning shades of amber and scarlet. The fall colors were Ella's favorite thing about living in Massachusetts.

They spent the next few hours skimming stones, chatting, and making use of the baseball bat and ball Steve kept in the trunk. They enjoyed an afternoon without any stress, just like they did when they were younger. It was starting to get dark before they realized they should leave. The day was exactly the distraction Ella needed from thinking about Christian. It was still eating away at her, now she'd made her decision she just wanted to get it over with.

However, one thing she couldn't get off her mind was just how much she wished Bucky had been there with them. She knew it was entirely her fault why he wasn't, but she wasn't expecting to miss him so much. It had been one day. Not even, barely sixteen hours had gone by. It felt wrong not having him about, and that was making her feel just as guilty as her thoughts about Christian.

On the way home she checked her phone, she'd intentionally left it in the car while they were out. Part of her plan was to let the day distract her from what was heavy on her mind.

There were two messages from Christian. She didn't bother reading them. She was disappointed to see there wasn't one from Bucky. Maybe he was being serious last night. She couldn't help but wonder if his resolve would break when he saw her at school tomorrow. She hoped so.


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