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The train ride home was like always. The Weasleys, Lily, Hermione, Luna and Neville would all take a compartment and attack the trolley. Lily would always buy lots of chocolate frogs, mostly for the cards that she was collecting for years, a habit she didn't forget about.

Mrs. and Mr. Weasley were waiting for them on the platform and didn't hesitate to engulf everyone in big hugs.

The Burrow was just as cozy as Lily remembered, her little heaven. She could still feel him everywhere, but the Potter realized that it was not as painful as before, that she started to forget his voice and the color of his eyes.

It scared Lily, the way she could so easily forget someone she had loved so much, someone who she promised the stars to.

But time had the power to make anyone forget, to leave only faint memories and the ginger started to get used to it.

She was healing.

"Ronald!" Mrs. Weasley's voice boomed from downstairs, startling the trio that was just sitting in Ron's room, talking about Christmas and food.

Ron looked terrified to say the least, his gaze jumping from one girl to the other.

"Go on, Ronald, it's your battle to fight," Hermione said, a chuckle escaping her lips.

Lily shrugged, not being able to offer her best friend any help.

He finally got himself up and out of the room, sending glares to the girls, as he almost tripped over the threshold.

"Mum is probably only going to make him cook," Lily said, turning to lay on her belly on Ron's bed.

She had been calling Mrs. Weasley mum for a while now, because the woman gave her a home and a chance at a new family and she loved her to bits.

"That's right, Ronald is just being dramatic, Mrs. Weasley isn't going to kill anyone...except the twins if they get in the way of Christmas preparations," Hermione said as she stroked Cookshanks fur.

Lily nodded, scratching her ears as she let her head fall onto Ron's pillows. The feeling of guilt was eating at her insides, spreading day by day.

Barely half a year had passed since Will died, barely a year and some months since she was last in that room with him, when he was still as vibrant and alive as anyone.

She felt overwhelmed at the thought that she was so easily seeking comfort in someone else, that their most important memories began to fade, that she couldn't recall the exact shade of his blue eyes or the shape of his smile.

"You're in over your head," Hermione started, long fingers wrapping around Lily's ankle. "What is it?"

"What do you mean?" the redhead muttered, burying her face in a pillow.

"Lils...you know what happened last time you had too much on your mind. Is it such a burden to accept my help?"

"It's the guilt, the guilt is keeping me from doing anything...and there's such a mess in my head, I have no idea how to explain."

Hermione crawled on the bed until she was next to Lily and their elbows were touching. "You can take your time, I'm not going anywhere."

Lily took a peak at the bushy haired girl from under the people. Hermione was smiling at her, a glint of encouragement shining in her eyes; the redhead sighed, hugging the pillow to her chest and raising her eyes at the ceiling.

"You can take your time, I'm not going anywhere," Will said, slowly caressing her cheek.

His blue eyes were sparkling, definitely enjoying seeing Lily in only her bra.

He was topless as well, freckles adorning his milky white skin. It was like the night sky; if she drew patterns with the help of the freckles, she'd form multiple constellations, some real and some only theirs.

"Did I ruin it, did I ruin tonight?" Lily whispered, averting her eyes. The thought of going further scared her and her insecurities were slowly eating at her insides.

Will got a hold of her cheeks, making her look at him once again. "No, love, you didn't ruin it. It's a first for you and for me as well, we can slow down a little. We have all the time in the world."

Except they didn't.

"I've been feeling really guilty lately," Lily started, holding the pillow like a shield, like it could stop all of her worst feelings from coming out. "I realize that with every day that passes, I forget something else about Will and he's much further away...I wish I could keep him alive through my memories of him, but they're slowly slipping away."

"It's also the fact that I can't keep going like this, loving the dead while the living can't reach me. I have suffered so much, his loss was the most heartbreaking thing that happened to me. There were things that I could tell only Will, things only he could do to help me because no one else would make the huge effort to understand. It's funny how I'm still clinging to him when all he'd want me to do is learn how to feel again, how to love him."

"I wish it was as easy to learn to love someone that isn't him as it sounds."

Hermione turned over, leaning on her elbows. "You think that moving on and loving so much else will feel like you've never loved Will at all?"

That was it, of course Hermione understood; there was nothing that could escape this girl's notice. Lily slowly nodded.

Hermione sighed, rubbing her temple. "Now you know that's not true, Lily. I know you know that, you're just too scared to move on and find that someone else could love you because it was comfortable with Will and definitely familiar. Of course it's scary, new beginnings are always scary, but loving someone else wouldn't mean that you never loved Will."

"The people I love have a tendency to disappear, that's what scares me the most."

The bushy haired girl slowly tucked a strand of hair behind the redhead's ear, looking at her sadly.

"That's not the case anymore, if you fall in love with someone and he leaves then he wasn't worth your time, Lily. You're more than amazing, the right person will simply see it."

Lily smiled slightly, turning to look at Hermione. A rosy blush took over her cheeks, bringing the color of her skin one shade closer to her red hair.

"I believe I like someone, though."

Hermione's eyes started to sparkle with excitement. "Really? How's he like?"

"He's kind of a jerk really," Lily replied, raising her eyes to look at the ceiling once again, a weird smile plastered onto her lips. "Now I don't really know much about him, but he seems similar to me, at least when it comes to talking about feelings and stuff."

"Then you're perfect for each other," Hermione chuckled. "Can I know who he is?"

"You'll kill me so no, not yet."

The bushy haired girl furrowed her brows. "Oh? Is he that bad?"

"You have no idea."

"Oi!" came Ron's voice from somewhere along the hall. "Need a hand down there or everyone is gonna have to eat burnt food!"

Hermione shook her head as she got up. "This boy is hopeless."

Lily trailed along, grateful for the people in her life.

.

The redhead watched from the living room's window as Ron's owl, pig, flew away from the Burrow, a package tied to his claws. The snow was falling slowly, covering everything in its path, making the world look so pure and untouched.

"Hello, red, anything on your mind?" Fred asked as he plopped beside Lily on the window sill; George joined them as well, leaning against the wall.

"Just that amazing treacle tart mum makes, I can't wait to devour it all," Lily said, making the twins burst into laughter.

"I think she's made an extra batch just for you," George announced, making a smile spread on the girl's face.

There was something oddly comforting about hanging out with the twins, watching as everyone gathered around on Christmas Day. The tree was spectacular, red and white decorations hanging all the way up to the top where the twins' best creation found its place; a garden gnome dressed to look like an angel. It looked like it became a tradition for the Weasleys to torture the creatures in that way.

Ginny was dozing on the couch, hugging Teddy Lupin to her chest. Since it was his first Christmas, him and his grandma, Dromeda Tonks, were spending it with everyone.

The sound of carols filled the whole room and Mrs. Weasley sang loudly along with them, Fleur joining her from time to time.

Hermione and Ron were playing wizard's chess and the redhead beat her each time, his girlfriend's glare close to killing him.

Bill, Mr. Weasley, Percy and even Charlie, who had taken some days of to spend time with the family, were having an animated discussion amongst themselves, the glasses of eggnog getting empty really quickly.

"I didn't think home would feel like home after we lost Will," Fred whispered, leaning his head on Lily's shoulder.

"And yet it still is, only his absence hurts," George continued, scratching his neck.

"He's still here somewhere, probably having a laugh at how boring we've all gotten."

"Us? Boring?" the twins said in unison. "Not possible!"

"You haven't pulled any pranks yet though," the redheaded Potter said, tickling Fred's side.

"Yet, red," George chuckled devilishly, messing up Lily's hair.

Some moments later, an explosion somewhere nearby startled everyone, marking the beginning of yet another chaotic Christmas.

It really felt like home.

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quick update so you know i intend to continue this book, i have other ideas for it though<3