𝗂𝗌𝗅𝖺 𝗉𝗈𝗏

𝗆𝗌𝗀 𝖻𝖺𝖼𝗄𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗀𝖾

october 4, 2024

5:40 pm

i slipped into my lace shorts, a flutter of excitement rippling through me as i glanced at my reflection. the shirt i'd made earlier—a cropped tee with the words "look at that woman"—felt like the perfect touch. it was the title of one of tucker's songs, and i'd spent hours decorating it with fabric i found at michaels. i'd also made a shirt for him, with "kansas anymore" spelled out in shimmering rhinestones across the front. a little sparkle never hurt anyone, right?

we were backstage, my friends and i, listening as tucker ran through his soundcheck. the rawness in his voice echoed through the venue, filling the empty space with a kind of electricity that made the hair on my arms stand up. as i crouched down to add a few last rhinestones to the design, my eyes drifted toward him, unable to resist.

there he was, standing at the edge of the stage, completely in his element. his focus was intense, unwavering, like nothing else existed for him in that moment except the music. the way he moved, the way the lyrics seemed to flow straight from his soul—it was mesmerizing. it always had been.

my fingers fumbled slightly with the glue as i watched him. i could feel the butterflies in my stomach waking up, their wings fluttering in sync with the melody. there was something surreal about being here, so close to him, watching him prepare to step into the spotlight.

a part of me wondered if i could ever really handle it—this rush, this feeling of standing on the edge of something bigger than myself. i'd always dreamed of a life filled with music, creativity, passion. but now that i was here, standing so close to it all, i couldn't deny the wave of nervousness creeping in.

was i meant to be here? did i have what it takes to hold my own in his world?

but then he hit the last note, and it rang out through the venue like a heartbeat, steady and sure. i felt it settle deep inside me, grounding me. tucker's eyes met mine for a brief moment, and he smiled—a soft, almost shy smile that made everything else fade away.

in that instant, i knew. i didn't have to question it anymore. i was exactly where i was meant to be.

𖤓°⋆.ೃ࿔*:

8:00 pm

it was 8 p.m. sharp, and tucker was about to take the stage. my friends and i were watching from the side stage, where friends and family of the artists stood, just a few steps away from the chaos of the crowd. tucker stepped forward, his guitar slung low, and the first note left his lips. the room exploded with cheers, but the loudest came from ky, as if he were hearing tucker perform for the first time.

the crowd danced and sang along, their energy infectious. i couldn't help but get swept up in it, caught between the buzz of the moment and the memories flooding in. i remembered the first time i saw tucker, not knowing he was a singer—just a guy in a crowd, his music making something inside me click. and now, here i was, backstage, watching him perform in one of the biggest venues in the world. what if i hadn't gone to that concert? what if none of this had ever happened?

felix pulled out the setlist that tucker had given us. after scumbag, the song he was currently singing, the next track was one of my favorites: "oh, gemini". the song brought back so many memories, memories that were tangled up with tucker in ways i could never untangle.

just as he was about to start "oh, gemini", tucker grabbed the microphone, and the room fell silent, hanging on his every word.

"this next song goes out to someone very special. you know who you are," he said, his voice steady as he slid into "if jesus saves, she's my type". the crowd screamed, and i could feel my heart beat faster.

felix, standing next to me, leaned in and whispered, "this song's for someone very special. it's you." she nudged me playfully, her eyes sparkling.

"and now he's singing a song that's not even on the setlist. i think it's confirmed that he likes you," cora added, her grin teasing.

"you guys are literally the blind leading the blind," i said, rolling my eyes but smiling despite myself.

"get up and dance, he's looking over here," ky said, nudging me.

i turned back toward the stage, and there he was, his gaze locked on mine, a small but unmistakable smile tugging at the corners of his lips. my heart skipped a beat, and before i even realized it, my feet were moving, pulling me into the rhythm of the song. i sang along with my friends, feeling like we were all in our own world, floating in this moment that felt like it could last forever.

as i danced and sang with my friends, tucker's eyes never left me. everything felt so alive—so real—that it was almost too much to take in. but for the first time in a long time, i felt like maybe, just maybe, everything was falling into place.

the music swirled around me, every beat vibrating in my chest as tucker's voice filled the air, raw and effortless. i couldn't tear my eyes away from him, even though i was surrounded by my friends, all of us caught up in the same exhilaration. it felt like time had slowed down, the world outside this moment fading away. the crowd's energy fed into mine, and it was impossible not to get lost in it.

tucker kept singing, his eyes glancing in our direction every now and then. each time, it sent a flutter of warmth through me, the kind that felt like it was burning from the inside out. it wasn't just the song—it was everything. the fact that we were here, together in this massive space, connected by something so simple and pure: music.

felix grabbed my arm, her voice rising above the music. "you're killing it. he's definitely looking at you."

i laughed nervously, feeling the heat rise in my cheeks. "no way," i replied, though i couldn't deny the way his gaze seemed to pull me in, like a magnetic force i couldn't resist.

"i swear, isla," she continued, her grin widening, "he's into you. you can't miss it."

i felt my pulse quicken. it was surreal—almost too surreal to even be happening. had he been looking at me this whole time? was i really the one he had dedicated that song to? the idea made my head spin, and i had to force myself to breathe, to stay present.

the song ended, and the crowd erupted into cheers, but my thoughts were a thousand miles away, caught in the moment before everything had changed. tucker was still there, his guitar hanging at his side, his eyes scanning the crowd before they landed on me again.

"you're a mess," cora teased as she pulled me back to reality, shaking her head. "you look like you've seen a ghost."

i tried to laugh it off, but i couldn't hide the way my heart was racing. "i'm fine," i managed to say, though my voice didn't sound as steady as i wanted it to.

"girl, you are not fine," drew said, an amused glint in his eyes. "you've got that look. the 'he's looking at me' look."

i rolled my eyes, but deep down, i couldn't deny the way my heart felt like it was about to leap out of my chest. the energy between tucker and me—whatever it was—was undeniable. i could feel it every time he glanced my way, every time he sang that song for someone very special.

as the band dove into another song, i let myself get lost in the music once again, but this time, i couldn't shake the feeling that something was shifting. 

tucker was nearing the end of his setlist, and the familiar opening chords of "deeply still in love" filled the air, wrapping around me like a blanket. i could already feel the weight of the song pulling at my heart. it was a song that had always felt personal, but now, standing here, watching tucker sing it so effortlessly, it felt like it was meant for me.

ky suddenly grabbed my hand, spinning me into a dance, pulling me out of my thoughts and into the moment. we all laughed and swirled together, moving to the beat like we were the only ones in the world. i couldn't help but feel like a fangirl, caught in a whirlwind of excitement and awe. it was like the first time i saw harry styles perform live—totally starstruck, heart racing, completely enchanted.

the music seemed to take on a life of its own, vibrating through me as i spun and laughed with my friends. but then, in the midst of it all, i felt it again—his gaze. tucker's eyes locked onto mine from the stage, and in that brief moment, the entire world seemed to stop. time slowed down, and everything around me faded. all that was left was the weight of his look, the intensity of his gaze pulling me in like gravity.

my heart skipped, the flutter of excitement suddenly replaced by something deeper, more real. i couldn't deny it anymore. i was falling for him again.

there, in that fleeting moment, i realized just how much i had changed—how much we had changed. this wasn't just a crush anymore; it was something that went deeper, something that had never really gone away, something that had quietly lingered in the background, waiting for the right moment to resurface.

the music swirled around me, but in that split second of eye contact, everything was silent. i was back where i started, right there in front of him, feeling the familiar pull toward him that had always been there. it was crazy, it was overwhelming, and yet it felt so inevitable.

i was in love with him all over again.

@𝗂𝗌𝗅𝖺𝖿.𝗌𝗂𝗇𝖼𝗅𝖺𝗂𝗋 𝗁𝖺𝗌 𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝖺 𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗒...

replied by rolemodel: i look hot

⤷islaf.sinclair sure...

⤷rolemodel damn i see how it is

⤷islaf.sinclair 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️

⤷rolemodel did i lie tho???

⤷islaf.sinclair no comment
rolemodel liked this comment

⤷rolemodel i'll take this as a yes

islaf.sinclair liked this comment

🦭

𝗁𝖾𝗒 𝖻𝗋𝗈𝗌𝗄𝗂𝗌, and she fell in love !!! can't wait to see isla be in love and be hella awkard with him 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

also why did it took me a lot to think what to write in this chapter🧍‍♀️like it's not even funny

if you have any ideas, suggestions, or just things you'd love to see, drop them in the comments, bbgs!

sub, like and comment!!

enjoy!