It was hard to think about things while seeing the sight of Hilltop. Its horizon was always one I thought that would welcome me.

The letter seemed like a weight in my pocket, the last living piece of Carl Grimes.

It was near sunset. Carl and I used to watch the sunset all the time. Now it was just a memory left with sore and tired muscles.

My dad led everyone through the gates of Hilltop with Judith in his arms. I lingered at the back of the group.

People were there waiting for us, Maggie, Enid, Carol. They immediately knew that something was wrong. Rick wasn't with us. Michonne wasn't with us. Or Carl.

Everyone walked past with their heads down, I saw Maggie, looking up with dry tears in my eyes. Jesus followed behind her.

"Lilia..?" Maggie asked and made her way towards me. "What's happened?"

"S-Something..bad.." My voice croaked. "The Saviours came last night..we all hid but, Carl.."

"Is he okay? Where are the others?" She asked.

I shook my head, colour starting to drain from my face. Eyes starting to water and hands shaking again. "Carl's dead." I sobbed out.

Maggie gasped, her eyes widened. She reached out to give me a hug and I gladly melted in it. "How?"

"He got bit...helping someone.." I cried. "He's gone..Mags.."

"I'm so sorry Lilia.." Maggie hugged me with a shocked expression on her face.

Carol then appeared. As soon as she noticed out upset faces she caught on something was wrong. I assumed that the Kingdom's people were also here due to the tents.

"Lilia?" Carol gasped. "Sweetie, what's wrong? Is everyone okay?"

"Not everyone.." Jesus spoke up for me. "Carl.."

I stepped away from Maggie to be hugged by Carol, who squeezed me tightly.

I saw my dad a bit further up and went up to him. I managed to slow myself down before running into his arms, Judith was still perked up on his waist.

I soon looked over back at Maggie to see her comforting Enid who was crying. Our best friend, who was also suddenly grieving.

I stayed outside as the others went inside. I went over and sat beside Enid who was kneeling. She was still crying softly, and when she noticed my presence she went in for a hug. I held her close and sniffled.

"Was it them?" She asked.

"No, he was helping a stranger.." I replied. "He wrote you a letter. Wrote everyone one." I pulled out a letter from my pocket.

"Did he leave you one?" She asked and took hers.

"Yeah, haven't opened it yet." I nodded.

"He was one of my best friends. You guys were my first proper friends." She whispered. "It's just us."

"Don't think like that." I placed my hand on her back. "He'll always be with us."

"He was practically the only one of our friends who was our age." She laughed.

"Yeah, the rest were adults." I chuckled. "He doesn't want us to be sad, he wants us to honour him."

She sniffed and nodded confidently. "I'll do that. I'll honour him. I'm gonna go read this.."

"Okay, I'll catch you later?" I say.

"Will you read yours?" She asked and stood up. I took mine out my pocket at held it.

"Soon."

When she left my dad took her place and sat down beside me. For a moment there was distance between us, the wind howling between us as if it was trying to keep us apart. It was closed only when I shuffled closer to him so I could rest my head on his shoulder. I didn't know what else to do. I wasn't sure how long we were sitting in silence, staring out towards the gate with a look of despondence.

Tenatively, he wrapped his arm around my shoulders. I let my eyes raise to look at him and sniffled. Tears threatening to gather at my waterline. I pushed them back and tightened my jaw.

"I'm sorry," He said. "For everything, about the Sanctuary, getting Alexandria burnt down, Carl.."

"Don't.." I whispered. My face screwed up like I was going to cry again, twisting into pain as if to keep it inside. I couldn't fall apart in front of anyone. I needed to be strong, honour Carl. "This is not your fault dad.."

"How are you holding up?" He asked.

Words couldn't describe it.

I pushed my hands on the steps to hopefully break the pressure building inside my chest. Tightened them until the concrete cut deeply into my skin. My teeth grounded and gritted onto each other until my ears were ringing with pressure. The moment flashed before my eyes, every second of it. From when the bombs dropped, Carl, and now. It was impossible to forget. Amnesia couldn't take it away. Not anymore.

"Not good, honestly." I replied. "He wrote letters, I've got one too.."

"You should read it." He suggested.

"I can't.."

"You have to, you can't let this build up inside." He said.

"It's the only piece I have left of him..now he's gone." I whimpered.

"Wait here," He said and walked to go get something.

Out through the doors came Judith running through, Carl's large hat on her head. "Li Li!" She crashed into my arms. Even I didn't miss the fact my lips finally twitched up a bit.

"He's always gonna be with ya'. No matter what kid." My dad said and sat back beside me, flicking the hat which made Judith giggle.

Judith climbed into my lap. "Carl?"

My eyes watered slightly. "He's gone for a while. Travelled to the special place where your mommy and Uncle Glenn are at."

"Go see him?" She asked.

"No, Judy." I held her closely to my chest. "He can see us, always keeping an eye on us."

"See him soon." She said.

I carefully took the hat off her head and showed it her. "He's always here."

She smiled and giggled. "On head?" I smiled a bit.

"Definitely." I chuckled and she wrapped her arms around my neck.

People were gearing up, grabbing weapons, putting on armour before running out the doors.

"Is it the Saviours?" I frantically ask after running down the steps. "Carol, Ezekiel?"

They both turned to me. "We are under attack." Ezekiel said.

"God sake, can't we catch a break? Where's my dad?" I ask and looked around.

"He is around somewhere, but he ordered you to stay on the sidelines." Ezekiel replied.

"Seriously? Give me a rifle at least." I sighed.

Carol grabbed a rifle and put it in my hands, I took a few spare magazines too. "Screw the sidelines kid. Go get 'em."

I raised my eyebrows. "Hell yes."

I mounted my gun through a window, looking through to see Maggie trying to speak to them before she gives us a signal.

"NOW!"

Gunshots fired in every direction, at the trucks, the Saviours running in, everyone who didn't have loyalty to the Hilltop fell to the ground. Men were scattered everywhere.

For a moment it worked, but suddenly a volley of arrows flew through the sky and sailed up to the balcony and struck down half the people there. Groans of people yelled out from those who were struck.

Annoyed with the losses of some Hilltop residents, I ran outside, away from the gunfire and behind some barricades.

"KILL THE LIGHTS!"

Looking around I realised she was talking about the vehicles scattered around, nobody wasted any time and they shot out as many as possible to plunge Hilltop in complete darkness.

Yells came from all around, Saviours left their cover for the wide open space. "Dumbasses."

A yell was heard from behind. I turned around to the side just in time to miss the impact from a Saviour's knife through the barricade. I jumped back a bit to miss his next wrath. He ran up to me and knocked me to the ground. He sliced my arm, cutting through my shirt and through my skin.

I groaned in pain, trying to go up to stop the pressure but he pinned my arms.

Someone squeezed the trigger on their gun and it left with a bang behind him, and the Saviour dropped onto of me.

I refused to let the gunfire and injury stop me, only then it did when I fell back onto the ground after trying to move the guy off of me with a groan. A ringing travelled through my ears, nausea coming up. But I'm not backing out now, I can't.

"You alright, miss?" Asked a woman who came to my side.

"I'm fine.." I nodded and she helped me up.

"You look a bit pale, come inside." She offered and we quickly went inside to join the rest of the people. Injuried people were gathered in the foyer of the house, those who weren't injuried were being tended for their wounds.

My arm quickly got bandaged up before I looked around and found the familiar angel wings on someone's back, realising it was my dad, I went over to him.

"There you are. I didn't see you." I said and he turned around.

"I told you to stay on the sidelines." He replied after noticing my arm. "You okay?"

"I'll live Dr Dixon." I chuckled. "And it wasn't you who told me to stay, 'King' Ezekiel did." I shrugged. "So I ignored him."

"Ain't that treason for ignorin a king?" He grunted.

"Yeah right."

"C'mon, help out with these people and get some rest. You look like shit."

"Gee, thanks dad."

"You look pale." He pointed out but I rolled my eyes.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

we don't like saviours

lilia doesn't seem too good... 😉 any guesses??