CHAPTER SEVEN

Vulnerability

     Nikolai couldn't find Estelle.

The lake was littered with broken pieces of the glorious Hummingbird and Nikolai had lost his goggles and his wool hat, but those were the least of his worries. He had to find her. She knew he wouldn't be able to do anything after this without her.

Taking a deep breath, Nikolai submerged under the water, twisting around to look for sinking bodies. He came back up again for air, shouting her name a few times before swimming a different way to look.

When he was out of the water, he heard a meek voice somewhere to his right. "Nik—"

Nikolai's head snapped to where the sound was coming from, and nearly forgot how to breathe when he saw her, barely afloat with a piece of debris. Her hair was soaked and all in her face, her shoulder wound turning the water red. He nearly took another moment to admire her, until he realized that this was not the time for that.

As quickly as he could, Nikolai made his way through the water towards her and took her in his arms, adjusting her to the point where he'd still be able to swim to the shore.

When he got there, the rest of the crew were already there, some injured or unconscious. Tamar helped expel water from a sailor's lungs while Tolya healed Ana's side injury. It wasn't a deep one, but certainly a painful one. As soon as she saw Estelle in Nikolai's care, she scrambled towards them, kicking up sand.

"Tolya," Nikolai called, gently placing Estelle down. With her hair splayed out against the sand and water sputtering out of her mouth, she looked like a drowned rat. Still beautiful, just soaked. And dying.

Estelle groaned, shifting around, her hand shooting out to grab her shoulder. Her distressed state killed Nikolai, he wished he could take the pain away from her if he could. If given the choice, he would take the pain and give it to himself instead.

Tolya leaned over her shoulder and peeled away the clothes over top of it. The wound was severe, she was bleeding out of claw marks and teeth bites alike. Nikolai clenched his jaw.

The uninjured Squaller turned on Alina, furious. Nikolai watched both the encounter and Estelle at the same time. "What happened back there? Kovu was almost killed. We all were!"

Alina leaned her head against her knees. "I don't know."

"You don't know?" said the Squaller incredulously.

"I don't know," she repeated, anger shoving into her words. "I didn't ask to be shoved into the Fold. I'm not the one who went looking for a fight with the volcra. Why don't you ask your captain what happened?"

Nikolai ran a hand through his hair. Blond again. Well, this was turning out to be a great turn of events. "She's right. I should have given her more warning, and I shouldn't have gone after the nest." If he hadn't, Estelle wouldn't be injured.

Then Mal stood in an instant. "What is this?" he asked, his voice low and dangerous.

They were staring at him in bewilderment, and something like cautiousness. "You have a Tailor," said Alina.

Nikolai winced, his eyes still on Estelle's writhing figure. Tolya scowled, pausing his work on her momentarily to say, "I am not a Tailor."

"No, Tolya, your gifts lie elsewhere. Mostly in the celebrated fields of killing and maiming." The words came easily. Too easily. He could imagine the look Estelle would give him.

"Why would you do this?" asked Alina.

"It was essential the Darkling would not recognize me," explained Nikolai distractedly. "He hasn't seen me since I was fourteen, but it wasn't something I wanted to chance."

"Who are you?" demanded Mal.

"That's a complicated question."

Alina sprung to her feet, trudging to him. "Actually, it's pretty straightforward. But it does require telling the truth. Something you seem thoroughly incapable of."

"I can do it," he said. "I'm just not very good at it."

"Sturmhond, look at us," Mal snarled, advancing. "You have exactly ten seconds to explain yourself, or Tolya's going to have to make you a whole new face."

Tamar leapt to her feet before he could reply. "Someone's coming."

Everyone on the shore quieted, listening. Estelle whimpered softly as Tolya worked. The sounds came from beyond the wood surrounding the lake: hoofbeats—lots of them, the snap and rustle of broken branches as men moved through the trees.

Nikolai groaned. "I knew we'd been sighted. We spent too long on the Fold." He heaved a ragged sigh, his mistake weighing heavily on him. "A wrecked ship and a crew that looks like a bunch of drowned possums. This is not what I had in mind."

The trees parted, and a group of mounted men charged onto the beach. Ten ... twenty ... thirty soldiers of the First Army. King's men, heavily armed. They were probably from the nearby camp in Kribirsk.

Slowly, Nikolai stood up. Alina's fingers twitched at the corner of his vision. "Easy, Summoner. Let me handle this."

"Since you've handled everything else so well, Sturmhond?"

"It might be wise if you didn't call me that for a while."

"And why is that?" Alina bit out.

"Because it's not my name."

The soldiers cantered to a halt in front of them, the morning light glittering off their rifles and sabers. A young captain drew his blade. "In the name of the King of Ravka, throw down your arms."

Nikolai stepped forward, placing himself between the enemy and his wounded crew. He raised his hands in a gesture of surrender. "Our weapons are at the bottom of the lake. We are unarmed."

"State your name and business here," commanded the young captain.

Slowly, Nikolai peeled his sodden greatcoat from his shoulders and handed it to Tamar.

An uneasy stir went through the line of soldiers. He was soaked through to the skin, but there was no mistaking the olive drab and brass buttons of the Ravkan First Army—or the golden double eagle that indicated an officer's rank. It wasn't what he had in mind, but it would hopefully work.

An older man broke through the lines, wheeling his horse around to confront him. Colonel Raevsky, the commander of the military encampment at Kribirsk. Nikolai knew him, and he knew Nikolai. That would make this all much easier.

"Explain yourself, boy!" the colonel commanded. "State your name and business before I have you stripped of that uniform and strung up from a high tree."

Nikolai wasted no time. "I am Nikolai Lantsov, Major of the Twenty-Second Regiment, Soldier of the King's Army, Grand Duke of Udova, and second son to His Most Royal Majesty, King Alexander the Third, Ruler of the Double Eagle Throne, may his life and reign be long."

Shock passed like a wave through the row of soldiers. A nervous titter rose from somewhere in the ranks.

Raevsky did not look amused. He leapt from his horse, tossing the reins to a soldier.

"You listen to me, you disrespectful whelp," he said, his hand already on the hilt of his sword, his weathered features set in lines of fury as he strode directly up to Nikolai. "Nikolai Lantsov served under me on the northern border and..."

His voice faded away. They were nose-to-nose now, but Nikolai did not blink. The colonel opened his mouth, then closed it. He took a step back and scanned his face. Raevsky's expression changed from scorn to disbelief to what could only be recognition.

Abruptly, he dropped to one knee and bent his head with respect.

"Forgive me, moi tsarevich," he said, gaze trained on the ground before him. "Welcome home."

The soldiers exchanged confused glances.

Nikolai turned a cold and expectant eye on them, radiating only what he hoped was command. A pulse seemed to pass through the ranks. Then, one by one, they slipped from their horses and dropped to their knees, heads bent.

"You've got to be kidding me," he heard Mal mutter from behind him.

"Rise," Nikolai commanded.

The soldiers got to their feet and stood at attention.

"It's been too long since I was home," he boomed. "But I did not return empty-handed."

He stepped to the side, then threw his arm out, gesturing to Alina. Every face turned, waiting, expectant.

"Brothers," he said, "I have brought the Sun Summoner back to Ravka."

To little surprise, Alina hauled herself up and punched him in the face.

—

As Estelle stirred, Nikolai dismissed everyone who was previously in the tent to have it to themselves. Not long after Alina punched him, Nikolai found an empty tent where Tolya could finish his work in peace and he waited, not caring if his face bruised for lack of attention. If he had other things to take care of, he did it inside or by the tent's flap, wanting to be there when Estelle woke up.

Immediately, he was at her side, waiting as she fully came to, her eyes slowly fluttering open and adjusting to the low light. She groaned and squinted at Nikolai, the corners of her lips turning up a little.

"You're you again," she croaked. Her hand gently reached up and cupped his face, and her finger lightly touched his growing bruise. "And you have a bruise."

Nikolai chuckled. "Alina's doing."

"Can't say I blame her," joked Estelle. "I've wanted to do the same many times before."

"I don't either," he admitted. "How are you feeling?"

She groaned, dropping her hand. "Like I died and came back in the span of several minutes."

"You lost quite a lot of blood." A painful sigh escaped her lips as Estelle sat up, grabbing onto Nikolai's awaiting hand to help her. Her other hand gripped her injured shoulder and her face contorted with discomfort. She sat there for a few moments, blinking the nausea away.

"Where's Ana?" she finally asked.

"Comforting the rest of your crew," answered Nikolai. "They weren't prepared for what happened out there."

"None of us were. But at least they were volunteers and not forced to go," said Estelle.

Nikolai stared at her. Aside from a few minor cuts and a noticeable lack of color in her face, she looked fine. Her golden nose ring matched the jewelry she wore on her ears and her fingers, all gold metal. Her eyelashes were long and curled, little pieces of her hair that had come out of her braid framed her heart-shaped face perfectly.

"You didn't tell them about me, did you?" Estelle asked meekly.

"Of course not," he murmured. "I would never do that to you."

She hummed, her gaze avoiding him. "You did it to Alina."

"It was a political decision."

"Of course it was," she said. "And you wouldn't do the same thing if I were in her place instead?"

He frowned. "Why does that matter? They know that there is a Sun Summoner in Ravka, but they have no idea there is a Star Summoner."

After a moment, she nodded. "Okay. I...uh, I was going to see if I could find the Darkling again."

Nikolai let out a breath and stood up. "Alright. I'll leave you to it."

He was about to walk out when her voice stopped him. "Wait." He turned back to find her staring at a spot on the ground, fiddling with one of her rings. "Can you stay? Just for a little bit? I don't want to..." Estelle inhaled. "I don't want to see him again."

The vulnerability in her voice was something she didn't let many people see, so Nikolai felt honored that she would trust him enough with that piece of information.

Without needing much else of an explanation, Nikolai walked back over and sat down in his chair again, next to her cot.

Estelle had never told him about what happened exactly between her and the Darkling, but he knew enough. The Shadow Summoner had taken advantage of her at a young and naive age, and then she fled Ravka. She found a crew, became the captain, and became frenemies with Nikolai. Technically rivals who loved each others' company.

She never explained and he never pushed. The other way would be the other way around if Nikolai didn't want her to know everything about him.

Nikolai watched, entranced, as Estelle settled herself on the cot with her legs crossed and her back straight. Her breathing slowed until the tent was filled with glittering tendrils of starlight that illuminated the crease in Estelle's forehead, her bottom lip hidden in between her teeth.

Nikolai remembered the first time she did this around him. It wasn't all that long ago, one of her many attempts to find the Darkling. Every time she failed and called her obsession "impossible", Nikolai had to correct her. Nothing was impossible, especially at this point.

Estelle's eyebrows furrowed, her eyelids fluttering even as they stayed closed. Eventually, she exhaled, exasperated, and opened them. The light slunk away.

Failure. Again.

a/n—We get to see a little bit into Nikolai's head here, I certainly tried my best. Lmk how it was!