˖*°࿐chapter twenty eight.
xxviii. LIFE GOES ON

———

janelle

My foot repeatedly tapped against the floorboard of the living room as I waited on the couch. My face showed clear signs of irritation and annoyance. If I have sit here for another hour, I think I'm going to scream.

The front door suddenly slammed, knocking me out of my thoughts. I didn't turn around; I just waited for my brother to enter the room.

"How was the rave?" I asked, hiding my disinterest on the actual topic.

"Oh, you know, loud, lame, rave-like," Stefan said as I brought myself up to my feet. "You looked like you were having a good time."

"Oh, I had a great time," I flashed a fake smile. "But, uh — is there anything I should know, or anything you'd like to talk about, bro-to-sis?"

"Where do we keep our weapons?" he ignored me.

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Pardon?"

"Crossbows, vervain grenades, all that hunter crap Jeremy was into." I shrugged my shoulders, pretending not to know where they were. "Ah, yes. The throne."

Stefan walked over to the chair and opened the hidden compartment full of weapons underneath the seat. He packed some bottles of vervain into a bag with his back facing me. My eyes shifted over to the syringe next to the couch, and I carefully watched Stefan. I flicked my wrist, aiming for Stefan's neck, but by the time I looked up, he had already caught it.

Stefan turned around and sighed, "Elena told on me. She's such a buzz-kill."

"And you're an idiot," I retorted, earning no expression from Stefan. "When I said to patch things up with your girlfriend, that didn't mean you could go all cuckoo-crazy like her."

"Who's to say I did this for Caroline?" he asked. "Maybe I did this for myself."

"It doesn't matter," I shook my head. "Now is not the time for a humanity flip, brother."

Stefan walked closer to me, not breaking eye contact. "You and Damon do yourselves a favor. Stay out my way today."

———

"What is he doing?" Elena questioned as she eyed her boyfriend, repeatedly hitting the leather couch with a poker.

"Looking for a healthy outlet to channel his rage," I replied as Damon swung the poker, knocking down the lamp, making Elena jumped. "He hasn't found it yet."

"Shouldn't you stop him," she suggested.

"Nah," I shook my head, "I always hated that lamp."

Damon chimed in on our conversation saying, "Stefan without his humanity is one artery away from Stefan the Ripper, and every day that goes by is one year of guilt waiting for him on the other side."

"Yeah. Well, not to add to our growing pile of bad news, but we didn't just lose Stefan. We lost our chance to spark Caroline's humanity," Elena mentioned. "Turns out, he was her emotional trigger." Damon offered the poker to Elena. "No, thanks," she declined.

"Well, take it away from me. Because I'm seconds away from using it on this." Elena took the poker from him and set it down as Damon grabbed the video camera Bonnie brought back from the prison world.

Elena glanced at the still-frame of Lily on the screen. "Who's that?"

"This... is Lillian Salvatore," he answered.

"Your mother is alive?" she took the camera to get a closer look as Damon went on.

"Yep," he confirmed. "Turns out she's been in a prison world snapshot of 1903 for over a century."

"Your mother is alive," Elena repeated.

"Oh, yeah. Alive and well," Damon interjected. "Not in the pine box I thought I buried her in, in 1858. And apparently, she's a vampire and not just any kind of vampire either —"

"Damon, your mother is alive!" Elena exclaimed.

"She's a Ripper, Elena," I told her, going over to take the camera away from her. "Makes perfect sense. Stefan was always such a mama's boy."

"How much of a mama's boy?" she wondered.

"He would have hanged himself with the woman's apron strings if it meant her approval," I answered, bluntly.

"We both would," Damon continued. "We loved her. She was our world."

More like a monster, but all right.

When I saw Elena smile at my brother, I had to give her the side-eye because whatever she was thinking, I 100 percent guarantee I'm not going to like it.

"No. No way," I refused. "Absolutely not."

"This is our way to get Stefan back. You can't tell me that his mother isn't an emotional trigger."

"Elena, this woman killed so many people that an entire coven of witches, mine included, built her a permanent timeout," I explained. "You don't fix one Ripper problem by unleashing another Ripper."

"Damon, think about it," she turned to him. "If this works, we don't just get Stefan and Caroline back. We get your mother back. Aren't you even a little curious to see her?"

When Damon sighed, I knew it was time to interfere. "Damon, don't. After everything I told you last night, you can't honestly be considering this as an option."

"What other choice do we have? Stefan's not exactly listening to reason with either one of us right now."

"I don't care!" I exclaimed. "I'm not letting you bring that woman back into our lives. She's done enough damage to this family as it is."

Damon adverted his eyes away from mine and turned to Elena, "I might know a few witches that could help."

"Damon," I warned.

"I'm sorry, Janelle. But it's our only shot." I scoffed, storming out the room as fast as I possibly could. "Where are you going?" Damon shouted after me.

"Away from here!"

This isn't right.

Lily was supposed to stay in that prison world for the rest of her miserable, immortal life. And when I ask my brother to do one simple thing for me, he can't even follow through. All because of his stupid girlfriend. This is a prime example of how much she gets in the way of my family.

This wouldn't be happening if Cassandra was still around. She'd know what to do at a time like this. Hell, she'd stop it from happening before Damon even got the chance to think it over.

She's the definition of a true leader.

I'd never match up to her to standards even if it is my destiny to take over for my coven. But Cameron was right. This is what my mother would've wanted for me. For me to carry on her legacy. To be a leader.

Not just for the coven, but for myself.

———

"How am I supposed to protect you if you don't tell me when things like this happen until hours later?"

"You know, Chris, I'm mad at myself enough for letting this situation get out of hand, I don't need to hear about it from my guardian, too."

So I called Chris to meet me at the Grill so that we could talk about some things. Mostly for me to vent about my brother and what he's planning on doing. Granted, there isn't much I can do at this point because my magic is still a bit wonky.

"Janelle, I've just got your best interest in mind," he told me.

I know Chris is probably the last person I would call in a time like this, but if he's going to be guardian, then I guess I should start treating him like one.

"Thank you," I said to him, sincerely. "At least there's someone out there who will listen to what I have to say."

"Speaking of, as the Phoenix's new found leader, what do you plan to do if Damon brings Lily back to Mystic Falls?"

"Hold on there, buddy. I'm no one's leader yet, nothing's set in stone," I laughed after taking a sip of my coffee. "But all I know is, Lily's going to flip Stefan's humanity switch, they're gonna have some mommy and me time, Stefan will fix Caroline, and then I will gladly drive a stake through that crazy lady's heart."

"And if something goes wrong?" Chris asked, making me roll my eyes. "All I'm saying is, don't rush into this if you know you're not ready."

"Can you have a little faith, please?" I asked. "If all else fails, I'll be here to take care of it."

"That's just my point, Janelle, what if you're not here? What happens if you have a date with the hybrid, or whoever else you're seeing this week?"

Since I haven't been keeping Chris in the loop as much, he doesn't know what's been going on lately. He knew about the baby, of course, but he didn't know I ended things with Klaus.

And from what I remember, he was oddly upset about finding that out we were together the first time around. Which was weird, but I never questioned him on it.

"Look, Chris, I don't want to go into it. But I'm not gonna be out on a date with the hybrid, or anybody else for that matter, anytime soon, so that I can focus more on restoring my coven to its natural order."

"What?" he asked.

I raised an eyebrow at him, "Did I stutter?"

"Janelle, you can't give up on love. Ever," he told me.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because you just can't, that's why," he replied. "It's not natural. Look, all I'm saying is you don't have to make that type of sacrifice to be the Phoenix's new leader. That's why I'm here."

"Chris, this is my decision, okay? It's what I think is best. I don't need any more distractions in my life. The only thing that matters is ensuring that everyone in this town is in good hands, even if that means having to break a few."

Chris shook his head, "This is not what's best for anyone, Janelle."

"How do you know?" I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Because I've seen the future and this isn't supposed to happen," he admitted.

"So what is supposed to happen?" I asked.

He scoffed, "Come on, you know I can't answer that."

"Well, since you're sent from the future to change it, maybe this is one of the things that need to be changed," I suggested.

"No, it's not," he said. I shrugged, pulling out a $10 from my purse and dropping it on the table, leaving the Grill with Chris following after me. "Believe me; it's not."

I left out the front entrance and pulled my sunglasses on. I walked down the sidewalk, not going in any particular direction. "I've made up my mind, Chris. You can't get me to change it now."

"Will you at least think about what I said?" Chris yelled as he tried to catch up with me.

"About what?"

"About slowing down a bit," he answered. "Not forcing yourself to take over everything just because everybody's depending on you."

"Hate to break it to you, Chris, but it just doesn't work that way."

"Why not? You'd be able to get your life back."

"But that would be selfish of me, wouldn't it? To put my needs before everyone else's," I noted. "Look. I'm not being a martyr, Chris; I'm not. I just get it now. I'm meant to lead my people to the freedom they very well deserve, and if I do my job right, that's exactly what they'll get. What could possibly be more important than that?"

"But, Janelle —"

"This is what my mother would've wanted," I cut him off with a slight smile. "This is me fulfilling my destiny."