~ 𝕄𝕪 𝕃𝕚𝕥𝕥𝕝𝕖 𝔸𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕝 ~
~ ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕋𝕙𝕚𝕣𝕥𝕖𝕖𝕟 ~

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
~ 𝕄𝕠𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕪 𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘 ~
~ ℕ𝕚𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕠𝕪𝕒'𝕤 ℙ.𝕆.𝕍 ~

I pushed her away...all I've been doing lately is exactly what I promised not to...
All throughout the last week I failed my to do what I was meant to do as her Guardian Deity. She got hurt last week and it was all because I left for a few minutes. If only I had stayed...

Never in my whole life had I felt so attached to someone besides Ryu because he's my closest friend and Kiyoko because Ryu is so focused on making her his. It's funny to witness every time she turns him down.

I wonder how Y/n is feeling right now. I knew that when I told her to leave me alone it would upset her but I didn't expect her to run home and skip the rest of school. Sugawara approached me straight away, he seemed angry but from his composure you wouldn't be able to tell unless you were staring straight into his eyes like I was. A small flame sparking whenever he mentioned his sisters name. I didn't only fail her I failed him as well...

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
~ 𝔽𝕝𝕒𝕤𝕙𝕓𝕒𝕔𝕜 ~

"may I ask about what you said to make Y/n so upset?" Sugawara asked with his hands on his hips and eyes focused on me and me only.

I didn't want to answer, they wouldn't understand anyway. "I did this for her own good..." was all that came out but I instantly wish I had said more. They way I spoke made it sound like I made a completely selfish decision but I felt it was the best option to keep her away from me. After all, I've done a terrible job of protecting her.

His hands fell to his side, "excuse me?" I just messed up for the second time today. "Her own good? How would you know what's good for her?" His volume was raising with every word he said and Sugawara never raised his voice unless he went into mother mode. "She's barely had any friends besides me, Daichi and Asahi and then when she finally makes another one...one who swore to protect her and help her feel more confident outside of our home...just pushed her away...did you even consider how she would feel about this whole situation?" What he said opened my eyes, I didn't think about her. What I did was selfish because I did this for myself, I didn't think about the effects it could have on Y/n. But still something was playing in the back of my mind.

"I understand that but still I...I couldn't bring myself to act like I did around her before the accident happened..." the whole team knew about the accident, they were told so that they could keep a look out whilst we were all in the gym so that Y/n could avoid them as we walked home from after school practice.

By now Sugawara's hands were on my shoulders and the fire in his eyes had grown, it was now a full blaze threatening to scorch everything around us. "Why?! Why not Noya?!" I glanced over at Daichi who would usually calm down anyone on the team who got like this but he just shook his head at me and looked away.

I couldn't take it anymore. Sugawara shaking my shoulders back and forth and him screaming in my face brought me to the edge. I grabbed his hands and pushed him away before taking a deep breath and finally voicing what my true reason was. "Because I failed her!!" As soon as these words left me my body went limp. My knees collapsed to the floor and my arms prevented my head from doing the same, I had never felt so guilty about something. "I failed...at the one thing I promised to do..." I couldn't speak anymore. My throat had clogged up from the overwhelming amount of tears brimming in my eyes as did my mind from the constant flow of negative thoughts and insults towards myself. I've ruined everything...

"Did you though?" Sugawara kneeled in front of me and placed one of his hands back onto my shoulder, this time without a bruising grip but an attempt at consoling my almost weeping body.

"Yes..." I manage to choke out an answer.

I lift up my head to look at him and I am met with gentle eyes. "I don't think she sees it that way Noya..." my expression shifts to one of confusion. I mouth a 'what do you mean?' and luckily he understood. "It was enough for her that you wanted to be her friend...at first she saw you as a protector but I'm pretty sure now she sees you as a friend and admires your courage to scare away her bullies and your passion for making sure she smiles at least once a day..." he smiles at me warmly. After he said this he walked away, grabbed his stuff and left. Soon after the rest of the team packed up and left as well, leaving me to dissolve in my own thoughts.

~ 𝔼𝕟𝕕 𝕠𝕗 𝔽𝕝𝕒𝕤𝕙𝕓𝕒𝕔𝕜 ~
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

I lift my hoodie off of my torso and throw it onto the chair by my desk. I should just shower then go to bed...I'll do my assignments another time...

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
~ 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕟𝕖𝕩𝕥 𝕕𝕒𝕪, 𝟞:𝟝𝟘𝕒𝕞 ~
~ 𝕐/𝕟'𝕤 ℙ.𝕆.𝕍 ~

You woke up in a state. Your shimmery silver hair was disheveled and knotted, the bags under your usually big and bright brown eyes were very prominent and your knees were sore and covered with scratch marks from your activities last night. You didn't know why but you found yourself not being able to control your emotions any longer. When Koushi got home he had to stop you from clawing at your legs, you weren't so rough on them that any blood was drawn or permanent markings would be left but you were gripping onto the flesh for dear life.

You were okay now though, well you weren't happy but you didn't feel a need to cry anymore so you were content.

You walk down the stairs carefully, not wanting to slip as you still had some sore spots from last week. "Morning, you hungry?" Koushi asks with a chipper voice but it was tuned down more than usual. You just nod at him, still not being fully awake paid a toll on you.

He placed a batch of pancakes in front of you and delicately glazed the syrup over them. "Eat up, you look like you need the energy" he left the rest of the syrup beside the plate in case you wanted anymore. You cut through them and they were softer than expected but that wasn't the only thing. The taste was amazing and so was the texture. They were light and fluffy but were also filled with a heavy sweetness that satisfied the needs of your sweet tooth. "How're they?" You hear your brothers sweet voice from across the room as he sips on a cup of coffee.

"They're really nice, thank you" you flash him a small smile before returning to the meal in front of you.

He takes your plate away once your done and washes it up. You thank him again and make your way back upstairs to get ready for school. When you finish you put everything in your bag that you'll need for the day and then you walk back downstairs to put your shoes on. "Ready to go?" You nod as you put your earphones in. "Let's get going then!" He wraps an arm around your shoulders and walks with you to the school, making sure to always keep you in his line of sight.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"Morning Suga-san! Morning Y/n-Chan!" Hinata comes tumbling over with a ball in his hands, clearly he's been waiting for more people to join so that they can start.

After around ten more minutes everyone is in the gym including Nishinoya but he doesn't speak to you nor does he even spare a quick second to look in your direction. You were currently sitting by the doors with a textbook resting on your bent knees, you had a test coming up soon and wanted to get some extra revision in."I'll be right back Y/n" Koushi, who was standing right beside you for a drink break suddenly put his bottle down and walked to the other side of the gym. You shrugged it off and continued with your reading.

"Um...Y/n?" Someone speaks in front of you with a quiet voice. You raise your head and are met with a nervous libero. He rubs the back of his neck and offers you a hand to help you up. "Can I talk to you for a bit?" You accept his help and stand up, brushing your skirt straight and then finally looking into his brown eyes again. A fluttery feeling could be felt in your stomach and some part of you had missed that feeling.

"Sure..."

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧