The glee club was gathered in the auditorium as they saw vocal adrenaline on stage.

"You bastard!" Nellie yelled.Jesse quit the new directions and went on to go back to vocal adrenaline.He was a traitor.Nellie trusted him at some point.But of course she was right all along.Jesse was a backstabbing traitor and cheat.

"Jesse? What're you doing up there with them?" Rachel questioned."I've transferred back to Carmel high Rachel,I'm sorry it's come to this,but you were guys were awful to me."

"Good! You deserve it you piece of-" Finn covered Nellies mouth and pulled her back.If he didn't do that,Nellie would've went off on him.

"You never accepted me, you never listened to my clearly superior ideas" Nellie was furious to the point where she couldn't speak.This wasn't fair.Jesse shouldn't never been allowed to join in the first place.All because Mr.Shue liked to trust the wrong people.

"You know what Jesse? If you really felt this way then why didn't you quit when you had the chance?" Nellie seethed stepping forward.

"Why are you here in our auditorium?" Finn asked stepping forward."The blogs and chat rooms say that we're finished,and that you guys are ripe to topple us.We just wanted to show you a something we came up with a few days ago to see if you agree with that assessment."

[Another One Bites The Dust-Vocal Adrenaline]

Jesse took one last look at Rachel before walking out of the auditorium along with vocal adrenaline.

"It's a Carmel high tradition.They psych out the competition a few weeks before the big show.They call it a funkification.Meaning they show us what they've got,and we spiral into a deep black funk." Artie told.

"Yeah.Yeah we used to do the same thing to other football teams" Finn added."You know,try and get inside their head before a big game"

"I gotta give it to them.That's smart as hell" Nellie commented."Yeah,well the difference was our football team sucked.Those guys were golden" Puck said.

"Come on,keep your heads up guys.It's going to take more than that to get us into the funk" They walked into the choir room to see that tissue paper was everywhere.

"You were saying?" Nellie gritted.The glee club was in charge of cleaning up the mess they clearly didn't make,and it was sad.Very sad.

"I feel so violated.It's like someone broke into our home" Tina said."We all know who did this.We need to plan what happens next" Nellie told the group.

"Look,it was a lame little prank.And the fact they're trying to get to us means maybe we got them spooked"

"Mr.Shue,I think you owe Hudson River and I an apology"

"For what?"

"We told you letting Jesse on wasn't a good idea.Now they got in our heads.Especially Rachel's" Nellie pointed over to Rachel who was sulking in a corner.

"And vocal adrenaline isn't afraid of anything.That number they did was fantastic.You know which doesn't make any sense.They had all the equipment.How did they even get in?"

"I gave them all keys.Helped them do a sound check over the weekend.Hey,this way fellas.Lets punch out this wall here.That'll open up the space a little bit" Nellie glared daggers at her coach.How could she do this? This was wrong on so many levels.

"Sue what're you doing?" Mr.Shue asked."I can't talk to you now,William.Drafting class is helping me redecorate around here.You see I have nationals over the weekend,and I expect to return with a comically large first place trophy for which I have absolutely no room for in my trophy case.As soon as you hurry up and lose at regionals,this choir room will become my official trophy annex.You know what it has to look like? Elvis' gold record room at Graceland.Except I'll be wanting far fewer morbidly obese white women waddling around and crying"

"Sue,get out of my room" Mr.Shue demanded."Glee clubbers,for you those who has not been damaged by massive doses of Acutane,listen up.In a few weeks,glee club will be finished.Now how do I know this? Well,I recently checked the odds whey my Vegas bookie,who told me that you're 40-1 underdogs at regionals.You are going to lose,and your dreams will be crushed."

Nellie was glaring so hard that she felt her eyes were going to pop out.

"Sue,can I see your trophy?" Mr.Shue asked."Sure Will.Hope and dream." Mr.Shue then threw it across the room.Nellie cracked a grin while everyone else gasped or flinched.

"You dropped your trophy Sue" Mr.Shue said.

"You know for me trophies are like herpes.You can try and get rid of them,but they just keep coming.Sue Sylvester has hourly flare ups of burning,itchy highly contagious talent.Enjoy your last few days here.This room is mine.

                                🎤🎤🎤
The next day Mr.Shue walked into the choir room as Nellie was laying down on one of the chairs."All right,guys today want to talk to you about your deepest regrets."

"Thinking it was a good idea to trust Jesse for a hot second.Pain" Nellie muttered before sighing.

"Giving my heart to Jessie just to have it crushed like the stage floor at a performance of stomp."

"Thinking trust me was a sensible birth control option."

"We all have some.I just finalized my divorce.I regret being in a relationship that wasn't working.Letting her put me in these deep funks and not fighting back."

"Besides creeping us out,why are you telling us this?" Santana asked."Because if we lose to vocal adrenaline at regionals,none of us are going to regret it.We will have given our best shot and we won't look back.But we will regret letting them get the best of us before the competition.Which is why we need to hit them back just like they did."

"So you want us to TP their choir room?" Nellie asked."Whatever the better,cooler version of that is.Like Uh,maybe we should steal their school statue"

"Their school statue is a giant bronze of a great white shark eating a seal pup.It weighs three tons"

"Okay,how about this one.All right we get like" As Mr.Shue was explaining his prank Nellie shook her head in amusement.Almost everyone knew the Puckerman siblings would have to carry this on their backs.I mean,it's not like anyone else had it in them to pull a prank.The two glanced at each other,before glancing over at Finn.Despite the fact that puck and Finn were not on speaking terms,hell they wouldn't even look at each other,defending the honor of the new directions was going to be their job.

Later that night
"Do you have to have an outfit for everything?" Finn asked as they walked over to the Carmel cars."Yep.I call this my felony outfit.You know,because we're committing a felony" (Image above!) Puck rolled his eyes at his sister and handed her a blade.

"You ready?"

"Yeah,let's do this"

The three teens started slashing the tires,and Nellie pulled out a can of spraypaint.

NELLIE PUCKERMAN WAS HERE BITCH.

🎤🎤🎤
Nellie,Finn,and Puck were all called into the office.Must've been about the cars.

"Yeah,we did it.And I'm proud.All I did was step up and be a man.They got what was coming to them." Puck exclaimed.

"A few of my students TP'd your choir room.You slashed the tires on the range rovers of all 26 of my performers.Those were gifts for our win at sectionals"

"Cry me a river.It was a stupid prank." Nellie jumped in." I'm sorry,you brought all your kids range rovers?" Mr.Shue asked.

"We have a very active booster club"

"Look,nobody got hurt.It was a harmless prank" Mr.Shue said."Exactly.Maybe while your kids pick up the scraps and try and get some new range rovers you can teach them how to be respectful and to not break into other peoples auditoriums!" Nellie yelled.

"That's what they said about a young man in Chicago in 1871,who thought he'd play a harmless prank on the dairy cow of one Mrs.O'Leary.He successfully ignited its flautulence and a city burned,William.That young terrorist went on the become the first gay president of the United States,Abraham Lincoln"

"What?" Nellie asked."Enough.These students committed a felony.They are hereby expelled" Nellie rolled her eyes."Wait for it" She whispered to the two boys next to her.

"Look,I don't want anyone to be expelled.I'm not going to press charges as long as you pay for the damage.You can take it out of the glee club budget" Nellie groaned."And how much will that be?" She asked in the most calm voice possible.

"That'll bankrupt the glee club.We don't have that kind of money."

"We'll get jobs.Give us a month.We'll pay you back,Mrs.Corcoran,I promise"

"Now wait a s-" Puck covered Nellies mouth before she can say anything else.

"Fine."

"Ms.Corcoran,you are as wise and magnanimous as you are beautiful" Figgins said.Nellies jaw dropped.Was he seriously trying to flirt right now? Nellie audibly gagged.

"Thank you" She mumbled before walking out."Well you just can't win can you William? You never have,and you never will."

Later that day the glee club was in the choir room as Mr.Shue was writing the topic on the board.

"Funk.Use it in a sentence" Mr.Shue instructed."Come on.Rachel?"

"This cheese smells funky."

"That's because it's "from-unda" cheese." Puck joked."Shut it Puckerman!" Rachel yelled.

"Ok,ok.I was thinking more along the lines of....vocal adrenaline has sure put us all in a funk."

"I'm so depressed,I've wore the same outfit twice this week" Kurt commented."And I'm so angry I wore mismatched socks with the little angry emojis on them" Nellie lifted up her foot so everyone can see.

"What if I told you I know how we could shove it right back down their throats? New Directions is about to make their funk the P-Funk.We are going to get funked up.The only way to do thay is to beat them at regionals.Vocal adrenaline has never done a funk number.They're a machine,a collective,synthesized,soulless beat.Funk is soul meets anger.It's passion in its emotion.And vocal adrenaline hasn't performed with any.So you have your assignment.I want you to turn McKinley High into....Funky town." Nellie snickered at the comment.

"You guys can relax,I got this one covered." Mercedes said."Hold on a second.I-I want a chance to get funky too" Quinn commented.

"Good one Quinn.It even sounds funny when you say it."

"You said funk was about soul and anger.I have plenty of both.Look at me.Look at my life.I'm furious!"

"Let's be honest.When white peoples try to be funky,you end up with KC and the sunshine band" Mercedes laughed.

"I love boogie shoes" Artie grinned.Nellie laughed along as well."Mercedes racism aside,I will have something prepared tomorrow" Nellie honestly couldn't care less.This wasn't even her concern.

"All right,Quinn goes first." The bell rang and everyone walked out except for Rachel.

                              🎤🎤🎤

"Oh you've got to be kidding me" Nellie whispered as they stood in front of Ms.Shue.Or whatever the hell her other last name was.

"Right,left,and flip,ok?" Nellie wasn't saying a word.Ms.Shue kept glancing at her but Nellie just glared right back."Can I go shirtless under this apron?" Puck asked.

"Can I not wear this apron at all? I think the uniform will look cuter if I tied it up like a crop top" Nellie explained."Look,I only hired you three losers because I'm desperate to increase my quarterly sales and you'll work for less than immigrants.As I'm sure you know,Mr.Shue and I are now officially divorced.I mean I'm sure he talks about it all the time"

"Like a middle aged man would want to rant to teens about his divorce" Nellie sarcastically said."Anyways I'm on my own now.And I need to make manager by the end of the year so that I can maintain my lifestyle."

"Terri,the guy who gave me Bell's palsy is back again today" Nellie leaned against the wall and played with her hair.This was the stupidest idea ever.

"So? Help him.He's our best costumer." She walked over and the man walked over to the three teens."You need to go help him."

"But she told you to do it" Nellie reminded."I have seniority over you three losers,which means you have to do what I say" Nellie scoffed.

"Well,then I need to kick your ass" Puck said stepping forward." Nellie held her arm out keeping him back.

"Bamboo!" He walked off and so did puck,Finn and Nellie.

"You three! Apron boys and the short apron girl" They walked over to Mr.Ryerson."You're not going to fondle us,are you Mr.Ryerson?" Puck asked."I've recently redone my bathroom as an homage to Miss Jayne Mansfield." They gave him a confused look.

"Pink! It's all pink! This is amaranth pink.I need rose pink" Nellie sighed."This is all the pink we have.You want another pink go to another store" Finn pulled her back."Are you trying to get us fired?" He hissed.

"Wrong answer.Did they change the name of this place to Losers N' things?"

"Ok,if one more person calls us losers I'm going to shove my foot up their ass" Nellie threatened."Did everyone in the whole world die so they had to give these jobs to you three morons? And where's my Muzak?! How am I supposed to shop without my Kenny G? Let's go." Puck walked over to turn on the music.

[Loser- Imagined by Nellie Puckerman,Noah Puckerman,Finn Hudson]

The music stopped and Nellie turned to see it was Terri."I thought Jews were supposed to be smart.Go restack the space heaters" Nellie and puck then walked off together.But before she walked off she noticed Terri giving love eyes to Finn.

"Ew" She mumbled under her breath.

                             🎤🎤🎤
The next day was the day Quinn was going to do her funk number.Mercedes was still upset about it,yet Mr.Shue was happy.

"Okay,Quinn,it's your day to show us your funky side.So,take it away."

"For some of us....just simply getting to class takes a little bit longer.When you're pregnant,you're responsible for two lives.And you're walking down the hallway oppressed by the man."

"I'm sorry what?" Nellie asked."Hearing people call you fat.Sometimes it hurts.Sometimes you have to stop and hold that precious life and say no."

"This is offensive.Who are these girls?" Artie asked."We're the unwed mothership connection.And that's what we're here to sing about." Everyone looked either confused or mortified.

             [Its A Mans World-Quinn Fabray]

At the end of the performance the glee club stood up and wrapped Quinn in a hug.Except for Mercedes.

🎤🎤🎤
Finn,Nellie,and Puck were going to sing their song for the week."I'm still traumatized from work" She commented.

"Mr.Shue? Puck,Nel and I would like to show the class the true meaning of funk.With a little help from our special guest Mercedes."

"Fasten your seatbelts people,it's gonna be a funky ride."

[Good Vibrations-Noah Puckerman,Nellie Puckerman,Finn Hudson,Mercedes Jones]

"Great job guys,but that's not funk.I mean,the group is called Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch,but that is a rap song."

"A very cool old school rap song" Nellie corrected."Does it really matter Mr.Shue? We're so clinically depressed,we're doing the wrong songs.We're in a deeper funk than ever."

🎤🎤🎤
Nellie was in the bathroom taking her meds when vocal adrenaline walked in."What the hell are you guys doing here?" She growled.

"We know it was you who slashed our tires" The girl in the front said.Nellie rolled her eyes."Aw,so? You guys did way worse."

"Grab her" A few vocal adrenaline girls grabbed Nellie and shoved her against the wall."LET GO OF ME!" She screamed.They took her bag and went through it.

"You're a looney? Taking meds." The girl laughed and Nellie had tears coming down her cheeks."Alright! You want me to apologize for slashing your tires? Fine! I'm sorry! Let me go!" They dragged her over to the toilet where they flushed down her meds.

"Swirle time.Jessie's gonna be so happy when he sees this" Nellie spit in the girls face and punched another one."Oh you done it now Puckerman!" Nellie was swirled.It was bad.Very bad.She had never given one to someone,but now she knew how Kurt and others felt when they got a swirle.They slapped Nellie one last time before laughing and leaving her in the bathroom,to cry her eyes out.

🎤🎤🎤
Rachel was in the choir room explaining her vocal adrenaline torture."And now I have nightmares of all the mothers of the baby chicks coming after me for revenge." Puck growled under his breath.

"Damn it,where's Nellie? She was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago" Finn said."Maybe she's taking her afternoon nap?" Rachel suggested.

"There's no way.That's not for an hour"

"Oh my god" Rachel gasped."Vocal adrenaline.Right before they left they said something about Nellie." Puck stood up."Where is she?"

Nellie walked in the choir room,soaking wet,and shaking from head to toe."Oh no" Puck gasped walking over to her.Nellie started to break down sobbing and puck whispered soothing words in her ear.

"Shh,it's ok Nel" He whispered."Vocal adrenaline did this to you?" Mike asked.She nodded against pucks chest.

"Screw this! Mike,Matt,Finn,come with me" Santana walked over and took Nellie in her arms."Right on.It's time for less talking and more punching." Mr.Shue walked in the choir room."Hey,what's going on?"

"We're on our way to go all braveheart on vocal adrenaline.They egged Rachel,and god knows what they did to Nel" Finn exclaimed.

"Guys,violence is never the answer" Mr.Shue argued."Well tell that to vocal adrenaline" Nellie sniffled."Oh it is when the question is "what's the best way to mess up that Jesse kids face."

"Mr.Shue,Rachel and Nel are one of us.We're the only ones who get to humiliate her" Nellie let out a sob and Santana rubbed her back.

"Stop! Get back here and sit down! Look I know from experience they making someone else suffer doesn't make your pain go away.You're all amazing,no matter what vocal adrenaline says or does.We just need to find a way to remind ourselves of that"

"We can't let vocal adrenaline get away with turning Rachel into a omelet and soaking Nellie"

"Nellie,what did vocal adrenaline do to you?" Mr.Shue asked."Almost drowned me and flushed my meds down the toilet" She explained.

"WHAT?!" Puck yelled."We're not letting them get away with this.Rachel,dial Jessie's number on your phone.Santana,Brittany get Nellie some towels and warm clothes" The two girls got up and walked out of the choir room.

"Jessie St.James? Will Schuester here.You and vocal adrenaline need to meet at our auditorium Friday,3:00 sharp."

🎤🎤🎤

Vocal adrenaline was in the auditorium and Nellie and Rachel were standing in front of them."Thanks for coming.After your brazen escalation of our growing dispute,which we were willing to put to rest,we decided the lit way to truly funkify is...." Rachel trailed off