the bed feels empty.

it takes me a second to realize why—why the blankets are a little looser, why the space beside me is colder than it should be. my hand instinctively reaches out, fingertips grazing the empty spot where ellie should be, but all i feel is cool fabric.

she's not here.

blinking the sleep from my eyes, i sit up, the realization settling in my still-drowsy brain. ellie always sleeps in—always. the only time she's up before me is when she has patrol, or when—

the scent hits me. warm. sweet. unmistakable.

cookies.

i look toward the small nightstand beside me, and sure enough, there's a plate stacked with golden, slightly uneven cookies, still warm. next to it, a napkin, and on top of it, in the messiest, most ellie ass handwriting imaginable, a note:

merry christmas, lei.

i stare at it for a second, my heart doing something really fucking annoying in my chest. then, without meaning to, i smile. big.

the door creaks open just a little, and ellie peeks her head inside, cheeks pink from the cold, hair damp like she's already been out.

"you're up," she says, shoving her hands into her hoodie pockets.

i hold up the plate, raising an eyebrow. "you made these?"

ellie shrugs like it's nothing, but her lips twitch, waiting for my reaction. "maybe."

"did you actually bake, or did you just stand there looking intimidating while joel did all the work?"

her eyes narrow, but she's still smiling. "i'll have you know, i made them with my own hands." then, grumbling, "joel supervised. but still."

i glance back down at the cookies, something warm creeping into my chest. "so you and joel woke up at the asscrack of dawn to bake... for me?"

ellie exhales, dramatic. "don't make this weird."

i laugh, shaking my head as i pick up a cookie, breaking off a piece and popping it into my mouth. it's good. a little rough around the edges, a little too ellie, but good.

"holy shit," i say, chewing. "you might've just unlocked a new skill."

ellie watches me, her eyes flickering over my face, studying my reaction. then, she grins, pleased with herself. "yeah?"

"mhm." i swallow, leaning back against the headboard. "might have to keep you around if you can bake and fight."

ellie snorts, rolling her eyes, but her ears turn pink.

before she can say anything, distant shouting from outside breaks the quiet, followed by laughter, yelling— the kind of chaos that only means one thing.

ellie perks up, glancing toward the window. "snowball fight's starting soon."

i groan, stretching. "already?"

ellie turns back to me, bouncing on the balls of her feet like a restless kid. "yes, already. hurry up, get ready."

i sigh dramatically, but i'm already swinging my legs over the edge of the bed. "okay, okay," i mumble, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

ellie watches me for a second, then, just as i'm about to stand, she snatches another cookie off my plate and bolts for the door.

"ellie." i glare.

she grins, mouth already full. "should've gotten up faster."

i shake my head, fighting back a smile, and finally start getting ready.

i get dressed quickly, layering up for the cold. a thick sweater, my warmest coat, gloves tucked into my pocket. by the time i pull on my boots and make my way downstairs, ellie's already outside, probably starting trouble in the snow.

joel's still here, though, leaning against the kitchen counter with a steaming mug of coffee in his hands. he looks up when he hears me, eyes crinkling just slightly.

"mornin', kid," he says, voice rough from sleep.

i step toward him, leaning my hip against the counter. "merry christmas."

his expression softens, and he nods. "merry christmas, leilani."

for a second, there's just a comfortable silence, the smell of coffee filling the space between us. then, before i can second guess it, i step forward and wrap my arms around him in a quick but firm hug. joel stills, like he's surprised, but then his free hand comes up to squeeze my shoulder, holding me there for just a second longer than i expect.

when i pull back, he clears his throat, looking down at his coffee. "you, uh... you got any plans today?"

i huff a small laugh. "ellie's dragging me into the snowball fight. then, i guess, the big dinner later."

joel smirks. "better watch your back out there. she plays dirty."

"oh, i know." i shake my head, already picturing ellie smirking like an idiot while pelting kids with snowballs.

joel chuckles, taking a slow sip of his coffee. "well, you have fun, alright?"

i nod, grabbing my gloves off the counter. "i will."

before i let myself get too sentimental, i give him one last smile and head for the door. time to go find ellie before she gets herself into trouble.

i step outside, the cold biting at my face immediately. the snow is fresh, thick, and the whole town looks like something out of a postcard. people are already gathered near the playground, the sound of laughter and shouting carrying through the crisp morning air.

i spot dina first, standing near a group of kids who are all packing together snowballs like tiny soldiers preparing for war. her cheeks are red from the cold, but she looks warm in her coat, her hands stuffed in her pockets as she watches the chaos unfold.

"hey," i say, walking up beside her. "you seen ellie?"

dina grins, nodding toward the middle of the snow covered playground. and there she is—ellie fucking williams, fully engaged in an all out battle with a group of children. she's got her hood up, a snowball in each hand, dodging and weaving like this is life or death. kids are laughing, some are yelling threats, and ellie's got the cockiest grin on her face, completely in her element.

i exhale, shaking my head. "jesus."

dina gives me a look—one of those smug, all knowing looks that immediately puts me on edge.

"sooo..." she drawls, rocking back on her heels. "when are you guys finally gonna start dating?"

i almost choke on my own breath. "what?"

she grins, crossing her arms like she's enjoying every second of this. "oh, come on. don't act all innocent. you two were literally at each other's throats, and now she's baking you cookies and letting you drool all over her in your sleep?"

i groan, rubbing my face. "i do not drool."

i blink at her, my heart skipping a beat. "wait—how do you even know about that?"

dina snorts. "she told me. duh."

my mouth falls open. "she talks about me to you?"

dina's smirk grows even wider. "mhm."

i narrow my eyes. "okay, well... what does she say?"

she hums, tapping her chin like she's thinking really hard about it. "hmm... nope, can't tell you."

i groan. "dina—"

before i can finish my sentence, something cold smacks me right in the face. i freeze. snow drips down my cheek, slides down the back of my neck. my eyes slowly refocus just in time to see ellie grinning at me from a few feet away, her hand still mid-throw.

"bullseye," she says, looking way too proud of herself.

dina loses it, doubling over with laughter as i stand there, still processing my betrayal. i wipe at my face, blinking flakes out of my lashes.

"oh, you're so dead," i say, already bending down to grab a handful of snow.

before ellie can get too far, she whips a snowball at dina, hitting her square in the shoulder. dina gasps, her laughter immediately turning into an offended gasp.

"oh, hell no," she says, already crouching down to grab a handful of snow.

i don't hesitate either. if ellie wants to start a war, she's getting one.

"you're done," i announce, packing the snow tightly in my hands.

ellie glances back just in time to see dina and i both winding up our throws. "wait—"

smack. dina's snowball nails her in the arm. mine hits her in the back of the head, sending snow flying into her hair.

ellie stumbles forward, shaking her head like a dog. "fuck! it's cold!"

"oh, is it?" dina taunts, already forming another one. "you should've thought about that before betraying me, williams!"

ellie barely dodges the next one, sprinting toward a tree for cover. "it was worth it!" she yells over her shoulder, grinning like a little shit.

dina and i exchange a look before silently coming to the same conclusion—we need more snowballs.

—

i'm standing in front of the mirror, almost ready for the dinner tonight. my fingers fumble with the delicate clasp of my necklace, but i can't quite reach it. it's frustrating, especially since everything else has come together perfectly. my dress is deep green with lace along the edges, fancy without being too much, hugging my figure in all the right places. my hair is down, but i've braided part of it back to keep it out of my face. i actually feel... pretty. maybe more than that.

the door creaks open behind me, and i glance over my shoulder just as ellie steps in. her hair is still slightly messy from the snowball fight, but she's cleaned up well, dressed in a faded flannel and some worn-out jeans that somehow look like they were made for her. casual. effortless. annoyingly attractive.

she's so hot. it's kind of a problem.

"you need help with that?" she asks, voice quiet but teasing.

i blink, realizing i've been caught staring at my own reflection instead of actually getting the damn necklace on. "yeah," i admit, exhaling a little laugh. "i can't get the clasp."

ellie steps closer, and suddenly the air shifts—her presence always does that to a room. she reaches out, her fingers grazing mine as she takes the necklace, and my breath hitches. her touch is careful, almost hesitant, but there's something deliberate about the way she moves, like she's noticing every little detail of me.

she leans in, her fingers brushing the back of my neck as she fastens the clasp. a shiver runs through me, and i know she notices because her lips quirk up slightly. she meets my eyes in the mirror, lingering for a second longer than necessary. "there," she says, voice softer now. "you look..." she trails off, eyes flicking over me before settling back on mine. a slow, crooked smile. "you look beautiful, leilani."

before i can respond, a knock sounds from the doorway.

"knock knock," joel's voice comes through, lighthearted and teasing. when i turn to face him, he's standing there with his arms crossed, a grin tugging at his lips. his eyes flick between me and ellie, taking in the scene with something almost like pride.

"look at you two," he muses, shaking his head slightly. "ellie, i swear, never thought i'd see the day you'd clean up this well."

ellie groans, rolling her eyes. "shut up, old man."

joel chuckles, stepping further into the room. then his gaze lands on me, and his smile softens into something warmer. "and you, leilani, look like you belong in one of those fancy magazines. damn near had to do a double take."

i laugh, a little embarrassed, but i can't deny how nice it feels. "thanks, joel."

he nods approvingly, then gestures toward the door. "now, y'all ready for this dinner? whole town's showin' up, and i ain't waitin' around for you two to finish makin' eyes at each other."

ellie lets out an exasperated noise. "jesus christ, let's go before he keeps talkin'."

i bite back a smile, giving joel a playful eye roll as i follow ellie out the door.

when we step into the mess hall, it's like stepping into a whole different world. the room is practically glowing—strings of warm lights hang from the wooden beams, casting everything in a soft golden hue. wreaths and garlands decorate the walls, and someone's gone all out on the centerpiece of each long table, pinecones and candles arranged neatly. the smell of roasted meat, fresh bread, and cinnamon fills the air, making my stomach growl almost immediately.

a record player in the corner is playing some old christmas song, something soft and nostalgic. the whole town is here, people dressed up, laughing, chatting, greeting each other with warm smiles. for a moment, it almost feels like the world isn't completely broken.

joel immediately gets pulled into a conversation with tommy near the entrance, clapping him on the back as they exchange some inside joke. ellie glances around the room, her expression unreadable.

"damn," she mutters, stuffing her hands in her pockets. "they really went all out, huh?"

"it's nice," i say, scanning the room. "festive."

"corny," she corrects, but i catch the way the corner of her mouth twitches like she doesn't actually mind.

before i can say anything, a voice calls my name from across the room.

"leilani!"

i turn just as nate approaches, weaving through the crowd. he's grinning, hands tucked into his jacket pockets. something about the way he walks, the ease in his shoulders, immediately puts me on edge.

when he stops in front of me, he pulls a small, wrapped gift from his pocket and holds it out. "merry christmas," he says, flashing that same confident smile.

i blink, surprised. "oh—uh, you didn't have to do that." my hands hover uncertainly before finally taking the gift. "thanks."

ellie shifts beside me, and i don't have to look at her to know she's glaring a hole through the side of his head.

nate shrugs like it's nothing. "figured you might like it."

ellie scoffs. actually scoffs. "figured she might like what?"

nate barely spares her a glance, still looking at me. "open it."

i hesitate, then carefully peel back the wrapping paper. inside is a small, simple bracelet—handmade, woven with green and brown thread. i don't know what i was expecting, but the fact that he put effort into making it catches me off guard.

"oh," i say, caught between being polite and not leading him on. "this is... nice."

nate grins, shoving his hands back into his pockets. "thought it'd go with your whole vibe."

before i can even respond, ellie lets out a short laugh, sharp and unimpressed. "her whole vibe?" she repeats, raising an eyebrow. "jesus, dude."

nate finally looks at her, his smirk faltering just a little. "something wrong?"

ellie crosses her arms, tilting her head slightly. "nah," she says, but her voice is tight, controlled. "just funny how you're actin' like you know her so well."

nate's eyes flick between us, his expression amused but vaguely defensive. "we've talked," he says simply.

ellie doesn't even blink. "not enough."

the tension crackles between them like static electricity. i feel my own pulse jump as i glance between them, unsure whether to intervene or let ellie fight whatever territorial battle she's clearly engaged in.

"uh—" i start, but nate beats me to it.

he smirks at ellie, shrugging. "well, maybe i was hopin' to change that."

ellie's jaw flexes. "not gonna happen."

the air feels like it's pressing in on me. this is definitely not how i thought tonight was going to go.