authors note: hi my lovelys!! i saved my first ever authors note for this specialllll chapter... hehehe enjoy <3

- leilani's pov -

the storage shed is quiet, almost too quiet. it smells like wood and something old, like time forgot about this place. i step inside, letting the door creak on its rusty hinges behind me, and glance around. there's not much here—just a wobbly looking table, a couple of crates stacked in the corner, and a single, grimy window that lets in a sliver of gray light.

what kind of "meeting" even happens in a place like this?

dina hadn't said much. just that she needed me here, something about brainstorming supplies for the next town run. "super important," she'd said with this overly casual tone that i should've caught onto immediately. but i didn't because apparently, i'm not suspicious enough when my friends start acting weird.

i take another step inside, brushing my fingers against the rough wood of the table, and turn to look at the door again. it's cracked open just slightly, letting in a thin stripe of light.

"dina?" i call out, my voice bouncing off the walls. "you here?"

nothing.

there's a moment of silence, and then—slam.

the door shuts hard, the sound echoing so loud it makes me jump. i whirl around just as i hear the unmistakable click of a lock sliding into place.

"what the fuck?"

i rush to the door, yanking on the handle, but it doesn't budge.

"dina!" i shout, pounding on the door. "what the hell is this?"

"don't freak out!" dina's voice comes from the other side, muffled but way too cheerful for the situation. "it's for your own good!"

"are you serious right now? open the door!"

"not until you and ellie figure your shit out," she says, and my stomach drops.

i turn around just in time to see ellie standing in the corner of the shed, her arms crossed over her chest, looking just as annoyed as i feel.

"great," i mutter, throwing my hands up. "you too?"

"don't look at me," ellie snaps, her jaw tight. "i didn't sign up for this."

"well, dina's about to get murdered," i say, jiggling the door handle again like that's going to do anything. "unlock the fucking door, dina!"

"nope," dina calls back, her tone annoyingly sing song. "you're both staying in there until you talk it out. good luck!"

and then silence.

i press my forehead against the door, my blood boiling. "i'm going to kill her."

"get in line," ellie mutters, and i whip around to glare at her.

"don't start," i say, pointing a finger at her. "this isn't my fault."

"oh, because you're so easy to get along with," ellie shoots back, her arms still crossed like she's daring me to argue.

"you've been mad at me for days for no reason!"

"no reason?" she snaps, stepping closer now, and her voice rises with every word. "you think i have no reason?"

"yes!" i yell back, meeting her halfway. "you're the one acting like everything i do is some personal attack on you!"

"because—" she cuts herself off, running a hand through her hair like she doesn't know whether to yell more or just punch something. "because you drive me fucking crazy, okay?"

her words hang in the air, heavy and raw, and it takes me a second to process them.

"what?" i say, quieter now.

she takes a step back, her hands on her hips, her head tilting back like she's trying to pull herself together. but when she looks at me again, her eyes are softer, less sharp, like she's finally letting something crack open.

"you're everywhere," she says, her voice quieter but no less intense. "in my head, in my fucking space, and it's like—god, it's like i can't breathe when you're around, but i don't want you to leave either."

"ellie..." my voice breaks, and the moment it does, i wish i could take it back.

"you remember the first time we really fought?" ellie asks, her voice tight, but it's shaking too. her words hit me like shards of glass, raw and jagged. "that shit broke me. i don't know why it got to me like that, but it did. i made you cry, leilani. and the whole time, all i could think was how much i wanted to fucking hold you. how much i wanted to take back what i did to you. but i didn't know how. i still don't know how to make it right."

i'm frozen. i don't know how to answer. her confession hits so hard that it knocks the breath out of me, and all i can do is stand there, listening, feeling like she's ripping herself apart just to tell me this.

"and the worst part is... i'm not even mad at you," she says, and her voice cracks a little. "i'm pissed at myself. because i care. too fucking much. and that scares the shit out of me. i hate it. i hate how much i care. it makes me feel like i'm losing control of everything. of myself. of you. and i don't know how to fix it."

there's a long, tense silence where i don't know whether to speak or just let her keep going. my chest feels tight, like i can't breathe, but i can't move away from her either.

"and then at the damn party..." ellie snarls, her fists clenching at her sides like she's trying to keep from punching something. "i saw you with nate, and i fucking lost it. i couldn't stand watching you laugh with him, seeing him touch you like that. i just wanted to be the one to hold you, you know? i wanted to be the one who made you smile, who made you feel safe. but i just stood there, fucking helpless, watching someone else do it. and it tore me apart."

she's pacing now, shaking her head like she can't figure out how to fix all of this. her frustration is so real, i can practically feel it in my chest.

"ellie..." i start, but she cuts me off again, her voice louder this time, more desperate.

"i don't know what the hell i'm doing anymore, leilani. i'm just—i'm fucking losing it. you're all i can think about, and every time you're not around, it feels like something's missing. but i push you away because i don't know what else to do. i don't know how to handle this, handle you."

"i don't know what you want from me, ellie," i say, my voice trembling slightly, unsure of how to keep it together. "but if you want me to stay, then stop fucking pushing me away."

i take a step forward, my chest tight with everything i've been holding back.

ellie looks at me, her breath shallow, her eyes searching mine.

"this," she says, barely a whisper, but it's louder than anything else. "i want this. i want you. all of you. and i'm fucking terrified of it, but i don't care anymore. i just need you. god, i need you."

there's no hesitation now. i step closer, my heart pounding in my ears, and before either of us can say anything else, her hands come to my face, her fingers cupping my jaw, pulling me in for a kiss. it's desperate, frantic, the kind of kiss that makes me forget how to breathe, how to think.

it's like we're both trying to forget every argument, every harsh word. my fingers thread into her hair, tugging her even closer, and i can feel her body pressed against mine, every part of her, hot and tight. she pushes into me like she can't get enough, her lips moving against mine with a hunger i didn't even know she had.

i pull away just enough to gasp for air, but before i can say anything, she's on me again, kissing me harder. i open my mouth to speak, maybe to ask her what this all means, but before i can get a word out, she presses her fingers to my lips, silencing me.

"shh," she murmurs against my lips, her voice rasps with need. her hand slides to my jaw, holding my face as she kisses me even deeper. "no talking. im tired of talking."

the way she says it sends a jolt through me. i try to speak again, feeling the urge to say something—anything—but she's not having it. she moves even closer, pushing me back against the wall, and it's like everything stops except for the feeling of her, her lips on mine, her body pushing into mine in a way that makes my head spin.

her hands slip to the back of my neck, pulling me closer, and my hands find her waist, fingertips digging into her skin, trying to pull her into me even more. and the way she holds me—god, it feels like she's trying to make sure i'm not going anywhere, that this moment is all we have.

i try to catch my breath, my chest heaving against hers, but she doesn't let me, not for a second. it's just the two of us, tangled in this kiss, and i don't want it to stop. i don't care about the questions, the fears, the confusion. in this moment, it's just her and me, and it's all that matters.

our foreheads touch for a second, lips still brushing as we both try to catch our breath, but it doesn't feel like enough. i want more. i need more.

ellie pulls back just enough to look me in the eyes, her lips swollen and her chest still heaving.

"you don't get to take this back," i whisper, my voice trembling but steady, my hands still gripping her waist like my life depends on it. "not after this. not after everything."

ellie's eyes flicker, her pupils blown wide, and for a moment, she looks like she's caught completely off guard. "i'm not taking it back," she murmurs, her voice rough and sure. "i couldn't even if i wanted to."

before i can say anything else, the sound of a lock clicking startles us both. the door creaks open, and standing there, looking far too pleased with herself, is dina.

"well, this is cozy," dina says, pushing the door open with the most dramatic eye roll i've ever seen. she leans against the doorframe, arms crossed, a smirk plastered on her face. "you know, i would've knocked, but i figured the two of you weren't exactly in a talking mood."

ellie groans, pulling back just enough to glare at dina. "really, dina? you couldn't wait five more minutes?"

"five more minutes?" dina raises a brow, laughing. "you've been in here for, like, an hour. i was starting to think one of you killed the other." she glances between us, her smirk widening. "but clearly, i had nothing to worry about. looks like the two of you were...working things out."

my face burns hotter than ever, and i try to take a step back, but ellie's hands stay firm on my waist. under her breath, she mutters, "ignore her."

"oh, don't mind me," dina says, taking a step further into the shed, her voice dripping with fake innocence. "i'm just here to let you two lovebirds out. unless, of course, you want me to lock the door again? give you more time?"

ellie's glare could cut through stone. "dina, get out."