PLEASE VOTE AND COMMENT

Mattheo's dorm had seen its fair share of chaos—duels, drunken bets, even the occasional Slytherin party—but nothing quite like this.

Outside the door, Draco, Theo, Blaise, and Enzo were making their way down the corridor, laughing about some ridiculous Hufflepuff incident Theo was retelling when—

"NOAH, GET DOWN RIGHT NOW!"

The four boys froze.

Draco narrowed his eyes. "Did that sound like—"

"Y/N?" Blaise finished, exchanging looks with the others.

A loud thump followed by a cackle sounded from behind the door.

Theo smirked. "Oh, this I have to see."

Without hesitation, he pushed open the door, and the group stepped inside—only to stop dead in their tracks at the sight before them.

There, standing on Mattheo's bed, was a small, curly-haired boy, bouncing with the energy of a sugar-high pixie.

Y/N stood beside the bed, looking thoroughly exhausted, one hand on her hip and the other raised as if she had been mid-scolding.

But that wasn't even the worst part.

Because clutched in Noah's tiny hands was a dagger.

Mattheo's dagger.

Silence.

Y/N turned her head slowly, eyes widening as she registered the four boys standing in the doorway.

Theo raised a brow. "What. The. Hell."

Blaise, the first to recover, folded his arms. "Alright, Y/N, is there something you'd like to tell us?"

Y/N groaned. "Not you too."

Draco's gaze flickered between her and the small child. "You have a kid?"

The accusation hit her like a bludger to the ribs. "WHAT? NO!"

Theo grinned. "That's exactly what someone with a secret kid would say."

"Oh, shove off!"

Enzo's lips twitched as he watched Noah, who was now examining the dagger with pure fascination. "Then, uh, who's the tiny gremlin wielding a weapon in Mattheo's room?"

Before Y/N could respond, Noah excitedly held up the dagger. "Look! She let me play with swords!"

Draco's jaw dropped. "You let him what?!"

"I did not let him play with swords!" Y/N snapped, quickly snatching the dagger away and replacing it with a chocolate frog. "I turned my back for one second—"

Theo leaned against the doorway, shaking his head in amusement. "You really expect us to believe you're not secretly raising a child?"

"I am not secretly raising a child!"

Blaise smirked. "Then why is he in Mattheo's dorm?"

Y/N inhaled deeply, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Because some desperate Ravenclaw girl begged me to watch him for a few hours, and for some insane reason, I said yes."

Draco snorted. "That was your first mistake."

Y/N scowled. "I thought it would be easy. He's five! How hard could it be?"

The four boys glanced at Noah, who was now hanging off the side of a bookshelf, his tiny hands gripping the edge as he kicked his feet.

Enzo let out a low whistle. "Yeah, I can see how that went."

Noah suddenly spotted the group, his eyes lighting up. "Who are you?"

Theo smirked. "We're the ones who are going to tell Mattheo he has an unexpected child."

Y/N shot him a glare. "You will not."

Before Theo could respond, the door swung open again.

This time, it was Mattheo.

And he did not look pleased.

His dark eyes scanned the room, taking in Y/N's exasperated expression, the boys' amused smirks, and, finally, the tiny child who was now dangling upside down from his bookshelf.

A slow blink.

Then—

"What the bloody hell is this?"

Noah gasped, pointing at Mattheo. "You said a bad word!"

Mattheo blinked. Then blinked again. He turned to Y/N, confusion etched into every feature.

"Love," he said, voice slow, cautious. "Why is there a child in my room?"

Y/N groaned. "I can explain—"

Draco smirked. "She has a secret kid."

Y/N whipped around. "DRACO, I SWEAR TO—"

Mattheo's face drained of color. He took a step back, staring at Noah, then at Y/N, then back at Noah.

"Wait. Is this ours?"

The room went dead silent.

Y/N made a noise of pure horror. "WHAT?!"

Theo was wheezing. Blaise had to turn away to hide his grin.

Draco, ever the menace, shrugged. "I mean, the kid does have dark hair. Looks about the right age, too—"

Mattheo turned to Y/N, panic creeping into his voice. "Love, tell me that's not our child."

Y/N's hands flew to her head. "OH MY MERLIN, HE'S NOT OURS!"

Noah, completely oblivious to the sheer chaos he had caused, suddenly leaped off the bookshelf—right onto Mattheo's shoulders.

Mattheo stumbled, catching the small child as Noah clung to his neck like a koala.

"I like you!" Noah chirped.

Mattheo looked utterly stunned. He slowly turned to the others, as if searching for some sort of guidance.

Theo grinned. "Congrats, mate. You're a father."

Blaise clapped him on the back. "Never thought I'd see the day."

Draco smirked. "At least now we know why Y/N's been so secretive."

Y/N threw her hands up. "I'M NEVER BABYSITTING AGAIN!"

Before anyone could respond, the door opened one last time, and a breathless Ravenclaw girl practically collapsed inside.

"Oh, Merlin, thank you, Y/N!" she gasped, clutching her knees as she caught her breath. "You're a lifesaver."

The room went dead silent.

Mattheo's eye twitched. "...Excuse me?"

The Ravenclaw girl blinked, glancing up, finally noticing the collection of very judgmental stares aimed at her. "Oh! Um..." She let out a nervous chuckle. "Did I... miss something?"

Y/N crossed her arms, absolutely done with today. "Oh, nothing. Just the past fifteen minutes of my life being turned upside down because these morons—" she gestured aggressively at the boys, "—thought I had a secret child."

The Ravenclaw's eyes widened. "Oh, no! No, no, no, Noah's my little brother!" She reached for the boy, who was still comfortably perched on Mattheo's shoulders. "Come on, Noah, let's go—"

Noah clung tighter to Mattheo. "I wanna stay with them!"

Mattheo's head snapped to Y/N. "Absolutely not."

Y/N smirked. "Oh, what's wrong, Dad? Can't handle the pressure?"

Draco chuckled. "He does seem quite attached to you, Mattheo."

Blaise grinned. "Fatherhood suits you."

Mattheo shot them all a glare. "All of you can go straight to hell."

Theo patted his shoulder. "Careful, mate. He already calls you Dad; it's only a matter of time before he starts asking for bedtime stories."

Y/N burst out laughing as Mattheo groaned in frustration.

Noah waved happily at the group as his sister dragged him toward the door. "Bye! I love you, Daddy Mattheo!"

The dorm erupted in laughter.

Mattheo swore under his breath and stormed off toward his bathroom. "I hate all of you."

Y/N smirked, wiping away a tear from laughter. "Babysitting might have been a nightmare, but that? That was worth it."