Aries: you look like you're in desperate need of leadership.

Taurus: you were made to be ruled. in the end, you will always kneel.

Gemini: you lied to me! i'm impressed.

cancer: you must be truly desperate to come to me for help.

Leo: i assure you brother, the sun will shine on us again.

Virgo: i am loki of asgard, and i am burdened with glorious purpose.

Libra: your savior is here!

Scorpio: this is my bargain, you mewling quim.

Sagittarius: is it madness? is it? IS IT?

Capricorn: trust my rage.

Aquarius: if i'm for the axe, then for mercy's sake, just swing it.

Pisces: now you see me, brother.