The next morning, Cole stayed in bed. He barely slept. He stayed up most of the night crying, hoping that it had all been a dream. A stupid, cruel dream. Yet it hadn't. And no matter how long he watched the analogue clock on his desk, nothing changed. His heart still ached. His eyes still filled with tears. His hands still shook. 

He felt so alone.

Whilst all his other teammates and friends were in the main room, probably eating breakfast together, Cole was led there alone. In pain. He hadn't been in this much pain since he lost his mother and that... that was the worst time in his life. He'd never felt so low. 

Laying in bed made him think way more than he should have. The warmth his duvet and blanket  were providing him did make him feel a little better but not all that much. It wasn't enough. He needed to feel the warmth of someone else; someone he loved. 

It reminded him of how his mother used to hug him. She used to give the best hugs. She used to kiss him on the forehead and tell him everything was going to be okay. He longed for someone to do it again. He'd always longed for someone to hug him just like she did. Maybe that was why he'd grown so attached to Jay right from the beginning. Maybe it was because he made him feel safe just like his mom did. 

All he needed right now was a hug. He wanted his mom to come into the room and tell him it would all be okay in the end. But she wouldn't. She was dead.

Cole couldn't understand why he was still there. He couldn't understand why the universe hadn't taken him away yet. He had no reason to live anymore. He had no one. He'd hurt too many people.

Knock knock

Cole frowned and glanced over at his bedroom door. He wiped the tears from his eyes and pushed himself up onto his arm. He stayed there in silence, hoping he'd heard things.

Knock knock

Someone was there. Whoever it was, he really wasn't in the mood for talking. 

"Cole?" A high-pitched male voice spoke.

The earth ninja groaned and flopped back down on the bed, his head in his pillow. His eyes began filling with tears again as the person's voice played through his head.

"Can I come in?" They asked.

"Go away," Cole called out.

And of course, it was the one and only Jay Walker. The one person he was avoiding obviously turned up at his door. It always happened. 

"What? Why?" he questioned.

"I'm sleeping," Cole groaned.

"Oh okay, sorry to bother you," Jay replied, "I'll come back later."

Cole felt awful. He didn't mean to be so horrible to him but he couldn't help it. His brain was taking control. But then again, why would Jay need Cole when he had Nya, right? 

"Actually, it's kind of important," Jay's voice spoke up again.

Cole groaned again, his heart pounding in his chest. He felt his muscles tense up and his throat closing in. Why wouldn't Jay just leave already?

"Um... so... Nya and I are back together," he sounded excited.

That was it. 

He couldn't take it anymore.

Why had Jay come to tell Cole about how happy he was about he and Nya getting back together? Why would he do that?

Jay knew exactly how Cole felt about him and yet he still decided to do stupid shit like this. He still decided to tell him all about it.

How?

Did he just wake up that morning like 'oh hey I should go and rub it in Cole's face that I will never like him in a million years'? 

That wasn't fair.

It was a stupid decision.

"G-great," Cole stuttered a little, trying to hide his cries for help.

"Yeah, I'm gonna take her on a date this afternoon," he continued.

Why was he still there? Why couldn't he just be honest with Cole and tell him he was acting stupid? Cole's stupid crush had gotten in the way of their friendship and it was obvious Jay was trying to ignore it. But Jay was so kind and caring so why on earth would he do something so selfish and arrogant as this? Maybe Cole's feelings didn't mean anything to him after all.

"Well, uh, I'll leave you to get back to sleeping I guess. Let me know if you need anything," Jay replied before scurrying off down the corridor. 

Cole screamed into his pillow, letting everything out. He couldn't handle it anymore. Why was the universe so against him? Why did the universe let him fall madly in love with his best friend?

He couldn't get over it though. He could never move on.

Jay was perfect in so many ways. He was the greatest person he knew. The way he just waltzed into Cole's life like he belonged there all along must have been illegal. No, the way Cole had just fallen for him must've been illegal. 

He knew he couldn't love his best friend but he just couldn't help it. And it tore him to shreds knowing that Jay didn't feel the same way. 

It was like this for the next few days. Cole just lay there in bed, drowning in misery. Someone would come and check on him every now and then but he'd only tell them that he was ill. Nya and Jay believed it anyway, but the other three knew that something must've gone wrong with his romantic gesture, especially considering Jay had gotten back together with Nya just a few hours after. 

Cole didn't eat anything. He didn't drink anything. He didn't move. He just wanted to curl into a ball and cry for hours on end, hoping his pain would go away soon. 

But now the team were growing even more worried. He hadn't come out of his room for three days and the only thing they could hear when walking past his room were soft cries. It was worrying; really worrying. 

Jay offered to go and check on him but Kai quickly jumped in. He knew what it was about and Jay going would only make things worse. Cole needed someone and it couldn't be the lightning ninja. 

Cole lay under the duvet, eyes wide open and staring at the wall of pictures of him and Jay opposite. It only made his heart ache more.

Knock knock

"Go away," Cole turned them.

"It's Kai, just let me in," He demanded.

"No."

Cole was sick of people bothering him. He just wanted to be alone. It's what he deserved.

"I know what this is about, so you may as well just let me in," Kai sighed.

"I'm sick, it's really contagious, you can't come in," Cole lied, tears building up in his eyes again.

"What a shame... Guess I'm just gonna have to get sick then," Kai responded sarcastically.

"Good luck trying to get in then. It's locked," Cole called out, putting his head in his pillow. 

Kai twisted the door knob and pushed open the door. Cole glanced up to see the fire ninja stood in the doorway with his hands on his hips.

"No it's not."

Cole groaned, "Just go away."

"No," Kai entered the room and closed the door behind him, "What's going on with you?"

"Nothing," Cole hid under the duvet, trying his best to avoid the conversation.

"Is it something to do with Jay and Nya getting back together?" He questioned.

"No.." He replied quietly.

Kai sighed, "I'm gonna assume the grand gesture didn't go too well. I mean its kind of obvious considering Jay and Nya got back together..."

Cole groaned, "I didn't even get my chance to."

"What?" Kai frowned.

"I was about to but when I turned up at his door, I only found him and Nya kissing," He muttered from under the duvet.

Kai looked a little shocked, "Oh.... okay.... uh..."

"So now not only am I heartbroken but I'm also traumatised."

Kai felt pretty awkward. He could understand why Cole was hiding away now. He was trying to avoid being hurt more by seeing them both together but in the end, that wasn't going to work. He couldn't avoid them forever. 

"So you're deciding to hide away?" Kai questioned, "I get why because, yeah, what happened sucks but life isn't always easy, Cole."

"Where are you going with this?" Cole revealed his head a little, looking Kai in the eyes.

"Jay is blaming himself for you hiding away. He thinks he's done something wrong. It's not fair on him," Kai told him.

Cole frowned, "What?"

"And we've all tried telling him that it's not. He barely believes the idea that you're sick. Cole, you need to get off your lazy backside and deal with this because not only are you causing yourself more pain but you're starting to hurt others too," Kai replied sternly, "We all miss spending time with you, especially Jay."

"I can't just walk in there like nothing happened. I can't sit there and watch Jay and Nya act all lovey dovey with each other," Cole responded.

"Yes, I know you're upset, whoopdeedoo, but you can't go the rest of your life stuck in here because you're gonna have to face them together at some point. Jay is your best friend and you should be happy for him no matter what. You can't hide away drowning in your own self-hate and regret because something didn't go your way. If you keep carrying on like this, Jay will lose his best friend. And I'm sure that's the last thing either of you want," Kai explained.

Cole thought for a moment. Kai was right. Was Cole really willing to give up his entire friendship because of this? The only thing he wanted was for Jay to be happy and if he was with Nya then he was glad. He'd been supportive of their relationship all the way up until this point, why did he suddenly have a problem with it? The only difference was that Jay knew how Cole felt now and he was choosing to ignore it, which was probably the smartest thing to do. 

Jay hadn't deliberately hurt Cole and Cole wasn't trying to do the same thing to him so it would only be right to apologise. Cole was acting selfish yet again. He needed to put his feelings aside for not only the sake of the team but also for the sake of his friendship and Jay's relationship. 

"Think about it," Kai told him, heading towards the door, "You know where to find us."

The fire ninja shot Cole a reassuring smile and left the room. Cole lay there for a moment in the darkness, contemplating what to do. Either give himself more heartbreak or be there for Jay. And without a doubt, he knew exactly what he would do. It was the only right thing to do.

So after a few minutes of trying to calm down, he pushed himself up and out of bed. He got dressed into his ninja gi, gave himself a mini pep talk, and opened the door. From the doorway, he could hear the sound of laughter and chatter from the main room, where he assumed everyone was.

He shut his door, made sure there were no tears on his cheeks and headed down the corridor with a smile on his face, pretending as if his heart wasn't desperately crying for help. 

"Look who it is," Lloyd smiled, spotting Cole who was now stood in the doorway of the main room.

Everyone glanced up at him with smiles. It somehow did make the earth ninja feel better. Seeing all his friends happy to see him made him feel reassured. It was like all the sadness was being lifted away.

Jay quickly got up out of his chair, headed over to Cole and wrapped his arms around him, pulling him into a hug.

And all that happiness quickly faded.

Except it was more of relief and pain at the same time...

It hurt seeing him especially after what happened but it was also relieving... The hug... The hug he loved so much. 

Cole tried his best to put his feelings aside. It was hard. So, so hard, but if he truly cared about Jay, which he did, then he would put Jay's needs first. 

After a moment, Cole smiled a little and hugged him back, gripping on tight to the back of his best friend's gi. He'd longed for this hug. He missed it.

"I'm so glad you're okay, Cole," Jay spoke, a worried tone of voice, not letting go of the hug, "I thought I was beginning to lose you."

Cole felt like a complete and utter jerk. How could he have even thought about locking himself away? How could he have even thought about leaving Jay like that? Had he really been led in bed for days questioning his friendship over a stupid crush? This was what he was talking about when he said he didn't want to hurt Jay anymore. Except he was doing it without realising. 

"I'm sorry Jay," Cole told him softly.

Jay pulled away from the hug, a wide smile on his face, "You don't need to be sorry. You have no reason to be."

No matter what Cole did, Jay was always so sweet and caring towards him. That was one of the many, many reasons why the earth ninja was in love with him. He never thought about the negatives in his friendships. It didn't matter to him if his friends or family hurt him. He just loved their company.

And Cole could understand why.

After finding out about being adopted, he probably felt so anxious that someone else would leave him. He didn't want to be abandoned again. So if he held on tight and cared about the ones he loved, he'd never lose them. If he pretended like everything was okay and that they could insult him and get away with it, then he'd never be alone again. He'd never have to risk being left behind. He'd never have to relive all of that stuff from the past. He'd never have to be scared of the same thing happening to his friends that happened to his parents.

Cole could feel the pain Jay was in. Just by looking into his eyes, he could see how special his friends and family were to him. The sparkle in his eye made Cole's heart skip a beat. He was wrong... Jay did care about his feelings. Cole was one of the only people that Jay had in his life and to know that out of all the millions and millions of people in the world, Jay chose Cole to be his best friend. It made their friendship feel so much more special.

He loved Jay with all his heart and all he wanted to do was scream it out to the world. He couldn't hold it in. But he had to. He needed to.

Instead, Cole just pulled him into another hug, enjoying the moment whilst it lasted. From this moment on, he'd promise to not let this crush come between them. He'd promise to support his relationship with Nya like a best friend should. He'd promise to be there for him no matter what and not run away from his problems.

It was going to be hard. It was going to be a challenge. But what use are challenges if you don't take them, right?