The very next day, I caught a terribly bad fever. My body all over felt extremely hot, especially when I had to keep the heat-containing blanket on. My head felt like it was constantly spinning, feeling like I was going to pass out any second.

I wanted to leave, but this sickness was keeping me down and unable to do anything.

What was worse, I was in Daiki's room, under his blanket and surrounded by all his things. I was forced. Not being able to move sucks when your boyfriend carries you over to his room and not being able to fight back, sucks even more.

I glared at the figure that walked out with a towel around his waist, around his hips, only a towel.

I felt my cheeks scorch ablaze even more than they were, I hid my face under the blanket and turned away.

I felt his hand touch my waist as I jolted under his touch. "Are you feeling better?" Slight cocky attitude in his voice made my cheeks burn hotter.

He's so...

I turned around to face him and moved the blanket away from my face, slightly still hiding it. "G-Get away...you'll get sick, idiot." My words were muffled by the blanket. But every time I rejected him for a kiss, he only came closer.

His face merely inches away from mine, I covered his mouth and started pushing him away.

"You'll get sick...idiot."

"That's fine, I'll get sick with you."

"At least go put on some proper clothes!" I shielded my eyes when I noticed his towel wasn't hung around his waist, but just laying there.

"Tsk, you're a mood killer." I surprisingly gasped at his comment and furrowed my brows, "We're too young."

"By two years."

"I'm not doing it and go change!" I defended.

☠

I respectively allowed Daiki to lay on my lap, knowing that if I argued, it would make no use.

Will this benefit me...?

First, I wanted him to stay away. Now, he's right here in front of me.

"Is something wrong? You've been acting distant lately." Daiki said out of the blue.

"I'm just...tired, that's all."

I'm tired of crying, I'm tired of yelling, I'm tired of being sad, I'm tired of pretending, I'm tired of being alone, I'm tired of being angry, I'm tired of feeling crazy, I'm tired of feeling stuck, I'm tired of needing help, I'm tired of remembering, I'm tired of missing things, I'm tired of being different, I'm tired of missing people, I'm tired of feeling worthless, I'm tired of feeling empty inside, I'm tired of not being able to just let go, I'm tired of wishing I could start all over, I'm tired of dreaming for a life I will never have, but most of all, I'm tired of being tired.

A whole lot of people don't understand the struggle to be good enough, to feel good enough. Lies are told to keep those they love from worrying...so I'm sorry I'm lying to you.

"You should get more sleep then," He tapped my cheek lightly as he was about to get up. I stopped him and shook my head with a smile on my face, "Being tired isn't always from lack of sleep. Stress, confusion, other things can cause it. It's not always sleep." I poked his nose.

Did I just...speak aloud?

Daiki looked at me in awe, "That's the first time I heard you say something like that..." He trailed off, "and I'm not lazy if you're saying that."

I rolled my eyes.

At least...you're making me feel better...

I looked down at my palms as I gulped.