Maybe we'll meet again one day. When you're not so broken and I am not so jealous. Maybe one day we'll be right for each other and it won't be so hard for you to love me. Maybe one day you'll forgive me for loving you too much.

But that isn't today. Because today you asked me to disappear from your life. So, I will. I am saying goodbye. I am letting you go.

But maybe one day, I won't have to.
One day.

-Soo Ji-

"Happy birthday Kwon Shi Hyun....", she whispers and blows the three candles. When the dimly light from the candles are gone. All that left is the darkness that surrounds her.

After we turn 20, let's just light the three candles. However old we are, one each for the three of us. Lee Se Joo, Choi Soo Ji, and Kwon Shi Hyun.

His words echo in her head. And she starts sobbing. It's been 6 years since that day. And it doesn't hurt any less. Instead, it gets deeper.

They said time will heal. And it was bullshit. Time just make her used to the pain. It just becomes part of her. The wounds. The pain.

Her life is great. She finished college early and sign a contract with one of the biggest Music Label. It was rare for a cellist to get that kind of offer. She made herself busy. She learns that being busy was so much better addiction than a sleeping pill. Because people will look at her as a hard worker, not a broken soul that needs to be fixed.

But tonight. She'll let the pain drown her. Because some night feeling hurt was so much better than being numb. She knows he won't be coming back. Not because he was gone, but because he asked her to leave him. Forever. And it was so much worst. To be unwanted like that.

Every year, on his birthday, she'll buy a cake and light three candles. Because deep down she's still hoping that he'll knock the door and wipe away all of her tears. And tell her that he comes back to her side. Dont worry. I am on your side. I am on Choi Soo Ji's side.

"I missed you, Kwon Shi Hyun....I missed you....", she curled herself on the sofa. "I wish I dont....bu I missed you...and it hurts....it hurts so fucking bad...", she clutched her chest as if it was physically hurt. Because that's how she feels.

The night finally has gone. The tears were dry. But the pain. The pain stays.

=====

Today is her free day. She always takes a free day on his birthday. Because no way in hell she'll show up at the studio like this. Like she just rose from the dead.

She wears sunglasses to hide her swollen eyes. She grabs her grey hoody and headed out. Nobody will recognize her as Sooji.

She goes to the pancake house near her apartment. Because she can't cook. And she was hungry after crying all night. She's miserable but it didn't mean that she should make her mom miserable for worrying about her if she gets sick. Because her mom is the only one she has.

She ordered original pancake with maple syrup. A lot of maple syrup. And black coffee. Life is about balance. Then take the corner table beside the windows. Her favorite spot. Because it feels like she's invisible but she still can observe the people who walk through the street. Searching for a face that she knows isn't there.

Her phone ringing. Unidentified number. She picked it up.

"Yoboseyo..."

"Yoboseyo...", Sooji heart stopped for a second. She could recognize his voice everywhere.

"Lee se joo?"

"The one and only..."

"It's you!", Sooji feels like crying again but she runs out of tears.

"It's me....you told me not to call you...until I finally find my own happiness..."

"It took you so long, huh?", she laughs. She missed Sejoo too.

"Sorry...."

"I am glad that you're happy now..."

"And you did great Sooji ah..."

"Thank you....", her tears fall unexpectedly hearing those words. Turns out you can't run out of tears.

"Can I be your friends again?"

"You've been and always my friend...pabo...", she could hear him chuckle.

"Ok chinggu.. let's meet tonight...I bet you've missed me so much..."

"Of course I do...tonight then..."

"I'll text you the address...See you tonight queen Sooji..."

"See you...", she smiled and hang up the phone. It's been a long time since someone called her like that. She missed him a lot. But missing Sejoo was easy. Because she knows she's never lost him as a friend. She's just trying to give him and herself a time to grow. And she's toxic. She didn't want to end up hurting Sejoo the way he hurts Shihyun.

======

Ps : It's been a long time since I want to write this story. And I can't get this idea out of my head. So I'll just write it and here we go...if you're interested, let me know...I'll write the next chapter from Shi Hyun point of view.