CW: There are some heavy topics throughout the chapter, including death and implications of suicide. Please don't read if these would be triggering for you! I will put a little summary at the end of the chapter. Love you all!

Song for the chapter: if you're meant to come back— Justin Jesso

Cedric ended up getting first place for the task. This lead to Hufflepuff throwing a huge party in their common room. The last thing Bianca wanted to do was attend the party. She knew it would look bad if she didn't attend the victory party for one of her best friends. To the Malfoys and Blacks especially, looks were everything. Bianca ditched her family's views long ago, but some were so deep-rooted, she couldn't seem to shake them.

So Bianca went into the dormitory with Juniper, Amy, Kate, and Elizabeth. The girls all began getting ready while Bianca lay on her bed. She didn't feel like getting all ready, because she didn't plan on spending too long at the party. Amy kept begging to do her makeup but Bianca laughed her off every time. She felt bad, she wanted to be happy for Cedric and celebrate with him but she just couldn't.

"I think we're ready girls," Juni sings as she and the three younger girls observe themselves in the mirror. "Bianca come over here so we can take a picture!"

Bianca rolls off the bed and brushes her fingers through her hair a few times to detangle it. She rubs her hands over her face and forces a smile as she joins the girls. Bianca does her best acting as she switches poses and makes faces in the picture. What would fourteen-year-old Bianca do? Just act like her and they'll never know how much you've changed. She's so far gone now, it'll never work. They know. The little voice in Bianca's head was being persistent tonight.

Bianca took a second to ground herself. She was getting a lot better at it. Now she only had to get through three or four senses before she was feeling calmer.

"Okay, you guys go ahead, I need to get Bianca this hair clip she asked for," Juniper says causing Bianca to come back to the present. The three girls say bye and hurry out of the room giggling.

"I never asked for a clip," Bianca blurted out once the girls were out the door.

"No, but it's time to talk Bianca. You've been even mopier lately, what's up?" Juniper asks softly.

Bianca can't meet her eyes. "I'm fine, honestly Juni let's head down before the girls get too knackered."

"No Bianca, you're not weaseling your way out of this one. No pun intended," Juni adds the second part as an afterthought with a little smile.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Bianca asks screwing her face up in a defensive way.

"It means, you and lover boy haven't said more than five words to each other in the last month. I didn't want to bring it up the other day, I wanted to let you come to me on your own, but you never did," Juniper says with a frown. She looks bites her bottom lip as her eyes begin watering.

Bianca's heart seems to break another time, she didn't know it was even possible to have your heart turn in so many pieces this early in life. She supposed it did make sense when it felt like the weight of the world was constantly on your shoulders. Bianca stops her depressing rambling as she pulls Juniper into a tight hug. She clings onto the girl, knowing they were both hurting and just needed to hold each other right then. The silent room filled with the sounds of the girls sniffling and shallow breaths.

Bianca pulled away after a minute and stares into Juniper's tearful eyes. "I'm so sorry Juniper. I didn't want any of me and George's shit to interfere with the group. From now on I'll-"

Juniper interrupts Bianca with a scoff, "We're not mad that you two are together Bianca. We're just confused why you guys aren't together."

"What do you mean?" Bianca asks in confusion. As far as she knew, George had never said anything to anyone about their kiss.

"We're not daft Bianca. We see the way you too look at each other when you think no one else is watching. You cling onto his every last word like a child and do his bloody homework. Not to mention, he's always been so good with helping you when you... get sad like you do. You guys just make sense okay?" Juniper rambles her eyes wild with emotion.

Bianca gets that stupid tingly feeling as Juniper talks about her and George. It was true, no matter how stubborn she and George were to admit it. "I know Juniper, it's just I don't want to ruin what we have. Some dark stuff is coming, we both know it, more than anyone. How selfish would I be to drag George into it? No one knows what they're going to do to try and recruit me. Loving George is just putting him in danger. They'll use him as a weapon against me..." Bianca trails off as she talks about it. She'd avoided thinking about it too deeply. George would be in danger, that's all she'd allow herself to think. Now that she said it though her heart ached at the thought.

"Bianca that's what you don't get, everyone's going to be in danger no matter what if You-Know-Who does come back. Wouldn't you rather have the person you love by your side during all of that?" Juniper replies softly.

Bianca thought about it. What if something did happen? Wouldn't she rather love and lose than never love at all?

"I'll think about it Juniper," Bianca whispers.

"In the meantime, will you try having a bit of fun? Just because you don't get to snog George's face off doesn't mean you have to mope around," Juniper teases with a huge grin.

So that night, Bianca did just that. It was the most fun she'd had since New Year's Eve. Bianca and Juniper spent the majority of the night with Cedric, Amy, and Amy's friends. For a little bit, the girls hung out with Lee and the twins. The boys were busy trying to build clientele outside of Gryffindor, so they didn't try to hang out with their friend group all night. A few times, Bianca would sneak a glance at George. He was still beautiful in that sweet, nerdy way. His eyes still crinkled, his nose scrunched, and his head fell back when he laughed.

The last time Bianca dared look at George, Juniper doubled over in laughter when she saw her. Juniper made such a scene that the boys noticed and she had to pretend she was having a coughing fit.

After that, Bianca decided to go sit by the fire where Kate and Elizabeth were gushing over Cedric. He kept shooting Bianca pleading looks but she just encouraged the girls with a laugh. The girls finally left Cedric alone when Elizabeth ran up to their dormitory to throw up.

"I'll never get tired of your fans," Bianca sighs as she and Cedric finish laughing at the girls.

"I definitely can," he says with a small smirk. "I ought to start a Bianca Lestrange fan club."

"No one would join," Bianca replies lightly with a scrunch of her nose.

"Oh yes, they will! It'll be my legacy, just you wait Lestrange!"

***

By the time therapy rolled around, Bianca was looking forward to her session. Bianca was finally ready to talk to Angela about George. She had successfully avoided any mentions of the boys during therapy because she didn't want to lie to Angela about being on good terms.

"I had a suspicion you hadn't told me everything," Angela says thoughtfully looking at the wall behind Bianca.

"Sorry," Bianca apologizes sheepishly.

"Nothing to be sorry for dear," Angela says. She turns to Bianca and looks at her like she is waiting for her to answer a question.

"I uh must've missed the question," Bianca says shaking her head in confusion.

"No, I think I have. You told me how hard it is to be without George. So why are you making yourself?"

Angela had a way of putting everything so that it seemed so simple. There was so much more at stake here, and Angela didn't seem to be grasping that. "He's going to get hurt," Bianca says looking down and wringing her hands.

"Bianca, he's already hurting."

Angela cut the session short again. She told Bianca to do what she truly wanted to do, not just what she thought was right. If Bianca was being honest with herself, it was getting hard for her to tell which option was which. Which one was the right thing and which one was just a wish? Was it even possible for George to get out of this unscathed? Bianca had already entangled herself so much in the boy's life, he was bound to leave wounded.

Cedric comes out of his session looking exhausted. Bianca empathized with the boy and suggested they skip dinner and head back to the castle. Cedric didn't protest, he looked rather relieved. When the two began walking back to the common room, something seemed to flip in Cedric.

"Do you think happiness is always temporary? Will there ever be a time where bad things stop happening and we heal from all the things of the past and finally, we just get to rest?" Cedric says dreamily. He was staring straight ahead, but it was obvious he couldn't see one thing in front of him, his mind was somewhere else.

"Stay away from the seventh years in the greenhouse Ced, that's not oregano that they're smoking," Bianca replies lightly. Cedric's words did get Bianca thinking, but she wasn't sure if she liked where her mind was going.

"No I mean it, Bianca," he says seriously. "Is the only time we truly know peace when we pass?"

Bianca's heart sank as Cedric said this. She wasn't sure if he was just feeling philosophical or if he was getting bad again like last year. The best way was to just be direct and ask him. "Cedric, are you starting to get bad again?"

His head whips towards her in alarm and he shakes his head at her. "No, I've actually never been better. Cho and I decided to make it official just before we came to therapy actually. I've gotten to spend time with you and Juniper. Hell, I won the bloody second task. Things are finally starting to look better! It's just, I don't know if this is going to last, it almost seems too good to be true."

Bianca stops walking and Cedric hesitates. She takes that second to pull him into a huge hug. "Oh Cedric, of course, it isn't temporary. You have years left, of course, you're going to have rough patches, but in the end, you'll be happy."

A/N: Sorry for such dark chapters lately. Bianca is kind of a reflection of me and writing helps me cope so when I go through it, Bianca goes through it lol. I've been binging Euphoria so that may also have had an effect on my writing. Also, I was high af writing this, so that's why there are so many deep conversations in this chapter. As promised, here is the summary of this chapter:

There's a party in Hufflepuff's common room because Cedric won the task. Bianca is in a slump and Juniper finally confronts her. Bianca tells her all about George and Juniper knew all along that they liked each other. She tells Bianca they should be together, but Bianca is too scared he'll get hurt since Voldemort is rumored to be rising. They end up deciding to just have fun and not worry about that stuff. Then Bianca's day for therapy rolls around and she tells Angela about George as well. She tells her to do what she truly wants, not just what is right but Bianca is confused about which is which. Then she and Cedric are going back from therapy and Cedric debates if happiness is permanent. They decide that one day they will be truly happy.