-Y/N-

I hated the silence.

It pounded through my skull, intruding on my thoughts, my head, my mind. It was in its transparency that it shone. It was in the lack of it that made it appear. It was nothing and everything all at once.

And it clouded around me right now.

Was I dead?

That was the first thought that came up in my mind.

But then why did it hurt so much?

Death should be painless, it should be soundless, it should be.... nothingness.

At least that was what I was taught. But maybe death was what I was feeling right now. A dark, empty void, filled with hurt.

My head hurt, my arms hurt, my legs hurt, my body hurt.

Yet I was numb. I couldn't feel my head, my arms, my legs, or my body. I just knew they hurt.

I lay in this puddle of ink for I don't know how long. It seemed like minutes, but for all I knew it had become hours. I slipped in and out of my consciousness, returning to the black void every time. But the more I went in and out, the longer I stayed asleep.

I think I quite liked it that way.

I liked falling asleep as opposed to being awake.

I hoped the next time I fell out, I stayed that way.

---

Bright light seared through my eyelids. I barely had time to register the air filling back in my lungs. I fluttered my eyes trying to get a sense of my surroundings. The first thing I felt was an ache in my chest. It burned warmly, then quickly died down.

Then I felt arms holding me up, pulling me closer to something.

"Y/N."

I heard my name being muttered.

I knew that voice.

Peter.

"Pete?" I managed to mumble.

"Y/N!" He responded with enthusiasm. I completely opened my eyes now. It seemed we were near a river. It bubbled near us. I was on the ground, half sitting, half held up by Peter in his arms.

"The war?" I asked.

"We won." He smiled. I looked at his face. I missed his bright blue eyes. I missed his soft hair. I missed the little dimple on his cheek. I missed his perfect smile.

I missed him.

"Ahem." I heard another voice, gruff this time. Peter and I looked to see Aslan standing above us. I looked closer now at my surroundings. Edmund, Susan, Caspian and Lucy were a few feet away, kneeling down on one knee in front of Aslan.

I used a bit of Peter's help to stand, then I myself kneeled beside Peter, facing Aslan. It was an honor to simply be in front of him.

"Rise, kings and queens of Narnia." Aslan told us. Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy arose. I stayed kneeling, as did Caspian. "All of you." Aslan added.

"I do not think I am ready." Caspian muttered, keeping his head down.

"It's for that very reason I know that you are." Aslan assured him. But I stayed where I was. I was nowhere near royalty.

"You too Y/N. You're more than a Queen... you're the Miracle." He stated. I looked up at him, slowly standing. Aslan smiled.

"You have all proved yourselves worthy. You have saved the Narnians, bringing back our culture and heritage to the homeland. I hope for the future, Telmarines and Narnians can live in peace, thanks to you heroes." Aslan announced. "You may go back to the castle and reclaim your throne, as well as get some well-deserved rest."

With that, we were excused. The army picked up their weapons and joined their friends. The mood was light. Where swords clashed mere moments ago, now laughter echoed. It seemed like all was well.

I still felt tired and weak.

I wanted to speak with Peter, but I was quickly dragged away by some of the Narnians. They praised me for my courage and asked me a lot of questions. The whole walk back, I was distracted by what they had to say.

When we finally reached the castle, they dispersed. I sought to seek out Peter, but found myself facing Aslan.

"Ah, I've been meaning to talk to you." Aslan noted as he saw me. I sighed internally, tired. But I think I may have let slip my internal emotions on my face. "It was about your time remaining in Narnia, but I'm sure it can wait. You've had quite the day." He chuckled.

My time remaining in Narnia? Remaining? It slipped past me that this wasn't my home. My heart gave a pang as I realized I'd have to leave this place behind. The pang in my chest turned into a weight, a burden.

"Aslan...wait." I called out. The lion stopped and turned.

"Hm, I'm sure you have questions about today?" He guessed.

"Yes." I nodded, not knowing where to start. "My powers...?" I decided to ask.

"Rare...miracles. They are a form of magic so old, that they are not written in any of the books anymore. Something so rare that they were only believed to be miracles. Thus, anybody who had them were called... Miracles. Though no one has yet had them... until you."

"Is that my title now?"

"I'm certain that's what people will call you now." He nodded. I didn't know how I felt about that.

"Did I die?" I asked, remembering my time in the dark void.

"Yes... in a way. A part of you did die, it was my power that brought you back alive." He answered.

"What about Lucy's healing cordial?"

"It wouldn't have worked."

"Was I supposed to live?" I asked, remembering back to the prophecy. If someone was forced to live, another would take its place. According to the Old Religion, the balance of life had to be restored. A life for a life.

"I do not know. Though I'm certain I'd have one very angry Royalty of Narnia on my hands if I let you die." He smiled to himself. "And four very sad ones... They appreciate what you've done, Y/N. You did well."

"You said something about my time remaining in Narnia... what do you mean about that?" I brought myself to ask him that. My heart hammered in my chest, awaiting the response. I wasn't sure I wanted to know the answer.

"You know in your heart that you cannot live here forever-"

"-But why not." I suddenly interrupted.

"Everything must come to an end." He answered. "Now, I will not force you to leave right now. I believe you have... some of your future remaining. But you will have to go... as will Peter and Lucy and Edmund and Susan. You do not belong here."

"But Aslan who's to say we can't belong here. That we can't live our whole lives here?" I persisted.

"It is not to be. These things are beyond my control. I am simply the means." The lion shook his head and started walking away. "I suggest you cherish your time here." He finished, turning away and walking off.

My spirits were dampened after my talk with Aslan. I trudged up to my room, fully decorated and furnished thanks to the kingdom. A new set of clothes were already awaiting me on the bed. I took a shower. I couldn't bring myself to enjoy the warm water, or the soaps. I sadly put on my new clothes and went to the balcony.

I took a breath of fresh air, wondering what day I'd never be able to breathe it again. I sighed, leaning on my arm. I looked down at the scenery, committing it to memory as if I'd never see it again. I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." I sadly said, not bothering to turn around to see who it was.

"Finally, some time alone..." Peter muttered. Instantly a small smile played on my lips. I didn't care how long I would stay in Narnia, every second with him was precious. I turned around to see him sprawled on my bed, his back leaning against the headboard.

In one hand he held a bottle and in the other two glasses. I walked away from the edge of the balcony towards him. "What's all this?" I asked, looking at him pouring the bottle's contents into the glasses.

"A little celebratory drinking." He grinned. He extended a glass to me. Of course, I'm sure it was just sparkling water, but I sat down beside him and took the glass. He put his glass up for a toast. "To The Miracle." He announced.

"I'm not sure how I feel about that name." I frowned, clinking the glass, nonetheless.

"I like it." Peter countered, taking a sip from his glass. "I mean, I'm High King Peter the Magnificent. I can't be with a commoner from the Main World. They've got to have some pizzazz."

"So, if I wasn't some powerful being, you wouldn't even be here?" I scoffed, taking a sip of my own glass. The drink was refreshingly cold and sweet, with a hint of bitterness towards the end.

"Nope." He said shamelessly. I hit the side of his arm. "Ow... I'm just kidding." He laughed, putting an arm around me and pulling me closer.

"I'll have you know that I'm only with you because you're the High King, if you were a Narnian commoner, I wouldn't have cared." I huffed.

Peter just chuckled. "I don't care if you're skinny or fat. I don't care if you're as pale as snow or as dark as the night. I don't care if you're missing a limb or have an extra one. I don't care if you're taller than me or shorter than Trumpkin. You could be half unicorn, and I still wouldn't care because I love you for you, Y/N. I love your laugh. I love the way you talk about the stars. I love seeing the ferocity in your eyes. I love you." He ranted.

As he talked, warmth filled in my heart as butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I nestled in closer to him, feeling his heartbeat. "I love you too Peter." I said quietly. He pressed a kiss to the side of my forehead. I returned it on his neck, nuzzling closer.

"You know what helped me fight in the war?" He asked. I shook my head. "You." He responded. "I just pictured your face when I held my sword and for that moment, I didn't think I was fighting for Narnia, or for Aslan... I imagined I was fighting for you... for us."

"That's incredibly sweet Peter." I said gratefully.

"You're my strength Y/N." He whispered softly.

We stayed like that for a bit, talking, finishing our drinks, just being in each other's presence and warmth. Peter sighed, his chest heaving up and down. "I can't wait to show you the rest of Narnia. It has the most beautiful winters you'll ever see. And the most gorgeous Autumns and Springs. You've already seen the Summer, but there's so much more." He breathed.

"How do you know?" I whispered.

I could feel his chest tense as his breathing halted. "What do you mean?"

This time I turned up to see his face. "You know we can't stay here forever... we're going to have to leave one day. How do you know I'll even be here long enough to see the Autumns, Winters, and Springs?"

"The last time my siblings and I were here, we chose to leave. We stayed until we were adults, well into our lives." Peter defended.

"Things never happen the same way twice." I quoted sadly.

"You don't know that." Peter said. His brows furrowed and his lips in a slight pout. I wanted to memorize his every expression. I wanted his face to be burned into my memories. He could tell the way I was looking at him. "Stop looking at me like that." He furiously muttered, looking away.

"Like what?" I asked softly.

"Like I'm going to disappear in front of your eyes!" He lashed out, standing up off the bed angrily.

"Peter, we have to accept what's coming and make the best of what we have right now." I told him. He paced, running a hand through his hair.

"I'm not going to live like this! How can I get attached to you if I know you're just going to leave one day?" He angrily sputtered.

"Grief is the price you pay for love, Peter." I stated. He didn't stop pacing and muttered something incomprehensible. He was clearly agitated and upset. "You said you'll love me no matter what... so now I'm asking you to love me... even if I won't always be there."

He stopped and stared wide-eyed at me, as if registering my words slowly. Then his face contorted in anger once more. "I can't.... I won't!" He grumbled. He turned on his heel and walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

I sighed, looking back down at the spot where he sat beside me, mere seconds ago. It was still warm from his presence. I laid back, staring at the ceiling. The knot in my stomach only tightened.

I hated the silence.