(v.)

To leave without saying goodbye.

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*Flashback*

"Look, I know you're not sure about whether you want to join us or not so, I have an offer for you." Taeyong knew that after this she would be sure to join. After all, this offer was too good for her to let it slip between her fingers.

"What is it?" She asked. Uncertainty laced her voice. She was curious to find out more even if curiosity killed the cat.

"If ever you feel like leaving this place, I'll let you go. You can't leave ,but instead you can go overseas and work on the international missions."

"Why?" At this point, she was honestly confused.

Why bother offering her individual assignments when she would be of better help to the team?

"You and I both know that asking you to immediately adapt to a team of eighteen boys would be foolish. Neither of you guys would get along because none of you know each other. Frankly speaking, I don't want any screw-ups either from either one of you."

"So..."

"So, with that being said, I don't want to give up on this team without even trying. I want to give you some time to get to know them and vice-versa. However, if it fails to work out for you guys, I don't want to force either one of you guys to get along with each other. I can't promise individual  assignments to you because I still have to see what you are capable of . At the same time, I am also unwilling to let go of you because you would be a great asset to the team."

She contemplated his explanation for awhile before realisation struck her.

"Still, won't you be the only one benefitting from all this in the end? I mean after all, you're the only one gaining from a qualified team with experienced shooters, snipers, people equally good at combat and knives etc-etc." She scoffed.

"Well, us mafia bosses, we need to do what we got to do. Now whether it's working in the favour of the team or me, only time would tell. Don't you think so too?" He smirked at her. That smirk straight from the pits of Tartarus, one only Satan could master living in the pits of doom.  

She should have been surprised but she knew better than this. After all, she was brought up by one that even Satan would bow down too. 

There was just no escape for her from this business. It was so disgusting being in one yet, the thrills that came with it was exhilarating for her.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'll keep the deal in mind. Don't be surprised if I come back in a month to claim it." She hissed before slamming the door on the way out.

"I hope you don't come back to claim this offer ever Y/n." Taeyong mumbled his wish, hoping that he would never have to see this day come.

"Flashback ends*

Alas, his wish was too good to come true.

"I...Take a seat." Taeyong motioned to her to the chair in front of him as he sat back down on his.

Y/n shuffled towards the chair, sitting down on it, anxious as ever. She really wanted that offer more than anything at this point.

"I'm going to be honest with you. I never wanted this day to come ever." He confessed. A part of him was still hoping for her to change her thoughts. Though, it seemed that she was not in the mood to take no for an answer.

"I want to claim that offer."

"Why?" 

"It's not working out. The last two months have been torture for me. I don't know if you haven't noticed by now, but none of the members and I are on speaking terms except for Doyoung. It's so awkward being around them."

"But, don't you think, you're being a bit petty here too? I mean they have tried to apologise to you a countless amount of times."

"I know and that's the problem."

"Explain."

"Before I forgive them, I need to start being more open to them about myself, but that means I need to sort myself out, get my life together and my priorities. The fact that I'm given a choice here is overwhelming for me. I used to be like a robot, controlled by my boss. Anything he commanded, I had to obey and do it, no questions asked. I was an assassin there. Here, I don't feel like one and that terrifies me."

"I want to be able to make decisions by myself first and know what I want. Being around you guys right now might not be the best because I need to be sensitive to so many people's feelings. Yet, I still have yet to learn about them."

"Y/n..." It was starting to make sense to him. Right now, he was just trying to prolong her decision because he did not want to see her leave just yet.

"Look, I'm not leaving the gang. I mean I can't since I have the tattoo already. It's just that I'm finally given a chance at having my freedom here and I don't want to waste it. Recent incidents and all the other problems are more like my reasons to run away from here. Honestly, I just need a break and the offer is the best way. Let me claim it, please." The last word was barely audible. However, Taeyong's ears caught on to it just fine. Her vulnerability was out there in the open for him to use to his benefit yet, he couldn't. 

There was silence in the room before Taeyong spoke up.

"Canada."

"Huh?"

"You're going to the base camp at Canada for however long you want. You decide how long you want to stay and where you want to stay. Update me on the location, the time period can be confirmed along the stay. Your location will be kept confidential. Only the two of us would know about it and no one else."

Y/n jumped out of her seat and rushed towards Taeyong's side. She pulled him out of his chair and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you." Her voice muffled due to his shirt. She sighed into his shirt, grateful that he agreed.

"But, can you let Doyoung in on this too?" She requested as she pulled away from the hug.

"Alright then.  I will get Doyoung to check in on you every now and then in Canada. I'll get the jet ready and update the members there about your addition to the unit there. I'll make some other arrangements so you better get packing. You'll leave tomorrow.

"Taeyong..."

"Don't worry, no one will suspect  anything. It would be covered up as an assignment. I'll send Doyoung with you to help you settle in while he helps out a bit over there. Other than that, most of the members are busy on their own assignments, quite a lot are overseas and some, at their own trainings tomorrow. No one will see you leave."

"Thank you. I really do mean it." She gushed with sincerity in her voice. 

"And Y/n...maybe one day you could find it in yourself to forgive me for me unveiling the truth to the poor boy. It wasn't my place to tell and I admit it but, I only had a good intention in mind. I'm really sorry. " Taeyong's apology left an uncomfortable silence in the air. 

Y/n gave a tiny nod before she turned away and walked out of the door, closing it behind her.

"Until, next time Y/n." Taeyong whispered. 

And then, he was forced to let go of yet another member.

~~~~~~~~~~

The next day took forever to arrive. No one knew about what was going on underneath their noses. 

And that was how it stayed even when Y/n left with Doyoung. She thought Taeyong would have came out to say bye to her, but he stayed in his office the whole day. By the end of the day, when a few of them returned from their assignments, her stuff was gone.

It was like she disappeared without a single trace left behind.

No one really knew she was gone till a frantic Jisung asked about her when he rushed into the living room after one of his assignments about two weeks later. Taeyong might have reassured most of them that she only went for a mission but Jisung was not dumb.

"If she's only gone for an assignment, then why is all her stuff gone."

How was he supposed to cover up when they figured out she was not coming back?

How was he supposed to tell them that she would be gone for awhile or maybe even forever?

"Tell us Taeyong. Why did she leave?" By now, everyone was present in the room and waiting to hear his answer.

A chorus of "Yes" filled the room in approval of the question.

"Because she said it was suffocating to be living here." 

It should have been Taeyong answering, but how could he respond when he himself did not understand her reasoning a few weeks back.

"She said it was suffocating to be living here when all everyone did was ignore her. Even if you guys did try, you stopped trying after sometime and that broke her. So, she acted like she was fine when in reality she wasn't. Obviously, none of you would know that because none of you bothered trying like how I did." Doyoung answered sarcastically. He had an accusatory tone, one that was criticising their actions.

"It can't just be one side trying Hyung. It couldn't have always been us trying to pacify her. She needed to understand our side of the story too. We know the truth must have hurt her more than us, but that doesn't mean she gets the chance to play victim all the time." Jaemin scoffed in disbelief at her reasoning to leave. 

The tension was thick in the air. Now even the quiet members were taking the chance to express their thoughts about this issue.

"You're right. That's why she left because she needed to sort herself out before forgiving anyone of you. She figured that it wasn't really anyone's mistake which is why she needed to come to terms with herself. If anything, she blamed herself for this more and than all of you. Hence, she was so embarrassed of even talking to anyone of you." Doyoung explained.

"She should have talked to us then." Johnny stated.

"She should have, but she couldn't because none of us made her feel wanted here. She clearly only felt like an asset to the team, not family after this incident. The fact that we gave her the privilege of making decisions for herself here overwhelmed her because she never had this opportunity before. She needed to figure out how to balance these feelings and become a human who felt something." Doyoung persisted after seeing doubtful pairs of eyes.

"Maybe, if we had helped her balance her feelings instead, she might have been staying with us right now."

"I can't believe she felt this way the whole time and none of us knew." Haechan muttered.

"Speak for yourself. I knew, but one man can only do so much." Doyoung retorted, rolling his eyes. Although the members came to their senses, it was too late.

"What if she leaves just like he did?" Yuta who had been quiet this whole time, spoke up about his feelings. His uncertainty was present in his voice.

"I thought we talked about this already Hyung." Renjun uttered under his breath.

"But, what if she really does?"

"Then, guess we will just have to suck it up and deal with the way we did years ago." Jisung scoffed, the bitterness present in his voice. 

Most of them still hated him for what he did years ago. After all, that incident destroyed them thoroughly. 

Someone once said, "If you catch on fire, people will come for miles to see you burn." 

They had been the ones enveloped by the eruption of the flames, scalding them in the process. Th entire group burned in a sea of red, orange and yellow as people came from miles just to see them perish in the deadly flames. The deadly flames hissed at them, hysterically laughing at them for even trying to get out of these flames that could never be extinguished.  The pain seared through their bodies. They begged everyone for help. They screamed in agony. They screamed until their voices were hoarse, until they were equivalent to those poor homeless people on the streets. They screamed until there were waterfalls gushing down their cheeks, their faces flushed. Those choked sobs making them gasp for air. Yet, no one was even willing to give them a hand. They mocked them for being foolish enough to trust someone of their own so deeply. They ridiculed them for being gullible. Most of all these sadistic people added the fuel to fire just to watch their wounds sting much more in pleasure. 

But, when NCT rose, they came back stronger than ever. Those sinister faces, void of any emotions. They were thirsty for the sinfully sweet taste of vengeance. They were out to make every single body who laughed at them, feeling nothing but regret. 

Oh, they were so ready for the taste of blood. They were so ready to watch the flames that once engulfed them become a blazing inferno as it burnt the rest. Regardless of what they felt for their family, they felt nothing for those around them. They were out to conquer this disgusting underworld that had now become their home. 

What was better than torturing them until they were on the verge of their deaths, yet never giving the, chance to die. Every time they attacked, NCT rendered them helpless. They gave them a chance to heal, but it never lasted long enough for them to even move because they came back, attacking them relentlessly until they screamed with hoarse voices for them to stop. Until, they fell at their mercy, pleading for NCT to kill them already, yet NCT refused to grant them their one true desire. They became a group of sadistic guys that enjoyed watching those in the wrong sufferers even until their last painful breaths. Their faces though were ones that were even deadlier than those that you saw in horror movies.

One was terrified while the other terrified.

They promised that they would never fall like they did before. 

And, if Y/n decided to leave them completely, they would do nothing about getting her back.

After all, once gone, she would be long forgotten, her chapter locked away, the words omitted. No one would ever open her chapter again just like how they never looked back into his chapter ever again. She would just become another leaf that gets carried by the wind to an endless horizon.

Gone like the wind.

Have you ever felt so betrayed that the ones who you called family were nothing more than a group of backstabbing liars who deserved nothing more but the wrath of the world? Have you ever thought all the things that you could do to them to watch them burn in the hells of doom and sadistically smiled at the thought of it? Yet, you know that if they were to ever come back begging on their knees, apologising, you would without a doubt, forgive them in a heartbeat. Only to be crushed later again and again. Until finally you understand...

Once bitten, twice shy. 

Fool me once, shame on you. 

Fool me twice, shame on me.

~END~

A/N 

Hey guys!

Your girl is back at it with yet another chapter. I feel proud that I managed to upload the second chapter this week. I felt rather excited about what I had planned about after the previous chapter so I wanted to get this one out too.  I hope you guys enjoyed it because my Term 1 week holidays are over and things are about to get really busy in this next term. 

I have 2 graded major assignments, Chemistry and English due this Thursday and then a briefing for my Biology graded assignment on Monday. Then, in the second week I have three Major exams, Mathematics and Geography and then Mother tongue. After that, in the third week my Physics graded assignment is due and then in the following week I have my Geography Assignment due with a project presentation in the same week. Through all of this and my competitions that begin the second week of school, I really don't know how I am going to upload the story but I am going to try really hard to upload for you guys.

Some questions for today: 

1) What do you think about Y/n leaving for Canada?

2) How long do you think she's planning on staying?

3) Who is the he that Yuta was referring to?

4) What do you think happened to NCT in the past?

Make sure to click that tiny star to leave a vote and feel free to leave any comments that you would like to do so.

- Peace-