(This occurs right after "The Cigar Song"  and continues Scene 2. This part of the scene centers on the most striking difference between the two psychiatrists: Freud was a strict atheist and Jung was deeply religious. This is where they first really discover this difference. Also, the time period is very sexist. So just a heads up.)

MINNA

We were wondering what your religion is Dr. Jung?

SIGMUND

(OFFENDED)

I wasn't wondering!

(PAUSE. THEY ALL LOOK AT CARL.)

CARL

My father was a Protestant preacher. But as I have become older I grow fonder of Catholicism to be honest...

(SIGMUND STARTS COUGHING VIOLENTLY)

CARL

(ALARMED)

Are you all right Sir?

SIGMUND

(LAUGHING)

You went from inhaling to swallowing, Dr. Jung. Surely you must realize that all religions are simply nonsense.

MARTHA

Sigmund!

SIGMUND

I do not discriminate. I would even include several aspects of our own Judaism, my dear.

(MARTHA SCOFFS)

CARL

Well, I would respectfully agree with your wife Dr. Freud. I think religion is quite important. Especially in matters related to the unconscious.

SIGMUND

I must say I am quite surprised to hear that coming from a man of science. Do you question Darwin's proof of evolution as well? Come now!

(HE STOMPS HIS CAN TO MAKE HIS POINT.)

CARL

Not at all. I simply view religion as something that you can interpret in the same way you would interpret a dream. Our minds and souls...

SIGMUND

Souls!??

CARL

Yes they create religion in much the same way we create a dream. That is my theory anyhow. Wouldn't you agree Mrs. Freud?

SIGMUND

I do not know why you are asking her. She has no skills to answer this question. She's just a woman.

MARTHA

I'm flattered that you would ask me Dr. Jung. To me religion is more tangible than my dreams. In fact I stopped dreaming quite a long time ago. When was that? When did we get married Sigmund?

SIGMUND

(He turns his back to her)

The difference of course is that a dream is something that actually exists in our unconscious minds...

MARTHA

(INTERRUPTING SIGMUND)

SEPTEMBER 13th. 1886!

SIGMUND

(IGNORING HER)

We remember it...

MARTHA

(INTERRUPTING)

Stopped dreaming that very day.

SIGMUND

(ANGRY PAUSE)

We remember it. It directs our behaviour. Whereas a religion is something we have all invented.

(ALL OF A SUDDEN HE ANGRILY POINTS HIS FINGER AT JUNG)

Usually to hide some kind of sexual hypocrisy!

MINNA

See this is why we can't have the Rabbi over.

CARL

Well I would like to kindly propose that if I were ever to embrace atheism it would be you, Sir, who would be able to convince me.

SIGMUND

Atheism is simply a fact, Carl. Why should I have to convince a scientist about evidence? Ridiculous!

CARL

Well I would not dare to question someone of your stature in his own house.

SIGMUND

(HE CAN SEE CARL'S GAME)

Well we will have to leave this house at some point then and have a proper debate on this subject. Over at the biergarten! Eh son? Or the local brothel. Ha ha ha!

MARTHA

Sigmund! Honestly. Where are your manners?

SIGMUND

(HURT LIKE A CHILD)

It's just a joke dear. See! That is why women shouldn't be present for these types of discussions.

CARL

Well I would look forward to that debate, Sir. In a biergarten, or...

(LOOKING AT THE WOMEN)

Ahem...chocolate shop.

MARTHA AND MINNA

(GIGGLING)

Oh my!

SIGMUND

(JEALOUS)

Don't call me Sir. Call me Sigmund.

(HE OFFERS CARL A DRINK)

CARL

It feels strange to call you by your first name. You are THE Dr. Sigmund Freud.

SIGMUND

I insist.

CARL

Well let us try that. Sig-mund! Author of The Interpretation of Dreams! I even brought a copy for you to sign.

(HE IS LIKE A TEENAGER WITH A ROCK STAR. FREUD BEAMS)

MARTHA

Trust me if you had to listen to him drone on and on about his dreams every morning you wouldn't be so impressed with this ape of a man...

SIGMUND

(CUTTING HER OFF)

Wouldn't you be more useful in the kitchen, woman? Our gentleman guest looks famished.

MARTHA

Minna? Some help please?

(SHE HEADS FOR THE DOOR)

MINNA

In a minute. I'm enjoying this discussion.

(MARTHA GLARES BUT LEAVES)

I love talking with the men.

SIGMUND

(SIGMUND HANDS CARL A DRINK AND CARL SITS)

Minna is the one woman I know who can match a man's intellect.

CARL

(AWKWARDLY)

Well it certainly smells delicious whatever it is.

MINNA

You know I'm looking for a therapist. Would you be able to psychoanalyze me, Herr Doctor?

(SHE LEANS IN ON THE COUCH, FLIRTING)

CARL

I'm certain I could fit you into my schedule.

SIGMUND

(GETTING BETWEEN THEM)

I am sure Dr. Jung has more important things to think about than your problems, Minna. Watch out for her. She's very modern.

MINNA

Well, maybe he would be able to interpret my dreams in a less sexual way than you do.

SIGMUND

(DEFENSIVELY)

I did not design the unconscious you know! I merely investigate its functions. All dreams represent our hidden sexual desires.

CARL

Of course, but don't you think there is a possibility that the dream world explores something more than just our sexual nature? I apologize for the language Minna.

(SHE SIMPLY ROLLS HER EYES AT THIS)

SIGMUND

Evolution is driven by sexual procreation. Sex is the main subject of our dreams because it is the only way the human race can survive.

CARL

(SHAKES HIS HEAD. THEY ARE MOVING TOWARDS EACH OTHER LIKE THEY ARE TURNED ON)

I appreciate the importance of sexuality. But I have been logging my dreams lately and I have noticed significant patterns and symbols that cannot simply be explained by mere sexuality.

SIGMUND

That is a very Catholic way of looking at the Universe, young Carl. You may be repressing your own sexual lusts by feeling guilty about who it is YOU actually desire.

CARL

(IN EACH OTHERS' FACE)

I have found the dream life of my patients to be far richer than just a sexual fantasy. And I assure you the only woman that I desire to have sex with is my own wife.

(MARTHA COMES IN WITH A PLATE OF LATKES)

MARTHA

Sex, sex, sex. Please we are in mixed company. And that is no place for sex. Latkes?

CARL

Sorry I apologize. That was extremely rude of me I...

SIGMUND

Nonsense! Why should we feel guilty? Talking about something that perpetuates the human race?

CARL

(SITS DOWN BESIDE MINNA)

Mmmmmm. These are delicious latkes. You know I really do enjoy the cuisine of the Jewish people.

(THERE IS AN AWKWARD SILENCE)

SFX: CLOCK TICKING. IT GETS LOUDER AND SLOWER

Some of my best friends are Jewish.

(MORE AWKWARDNESS. THEY LOOK AT HIM CURIOUSLY)

I hate the anti-Semites though. Don't you?

(PAUSE)

Down with anti-Semitism!

SIGMUND

(HE LETS HIM OFF THE HOOK)

HA HA HA!

(THE WOMEN LAUGH AS WELL)

Well that is one issue we can agree on young Carl.

CARL

Ah yes. Agreement. Good.

(HE BREATHES A SIGH OF RELIEF)

Well now that we have broken the ice about so many forbidden subjects I do hope you do not mind me inquiring...

SIGMUND

Please feel free to speak your mind.

CARL

... if you are so certain of atheism, then how are you to reconcile being...

(HE FUMBLES FOR WORDS)

SIGMUND

A Jew?

CARL

(MEEKLY)

Yes...a Jew.

SIGMUND

Just because I do not believe in a bearded old man in the sky with magical powers, does not change the fact that...

MUSIC: I AM A JEW!

(Next week Monday June 14/2021 I will publish "ACT 1 SCENE 2 SONG: I am a Jew!" in which Freud explains in song how he can be an atheist and a proud Jew at the same time. See you then!)