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      The following day it was decided that there had to be a meeting about the dead poets and what was going to happen when Nolan started asking questions.

       So here we were, sitting in the attic waiting for Cameron. I sat on the small crate by knox, leaned forward as my elbows rested on my knees and my hand came beneath my chin.

      Everyone was smoking apart from me but this time the smoke didnt bother me, I hardly even noticed it.

      Charlie pulled out a cigarette lighting it as we all sat quietly. You could tell by the silence that everyone was thinking about the same thing

      "You told him about this meeting?" I asked Meeks as he nodded

      "Twice" I sighed closing my eyes briefly

      "That's it guys, were all fried" Charlie said confirming the thought that we all had.

     "How do you mean?" Pitts asked looking back towards Charlie and I

     "Cameron's a fink. He's in Nolan's office right now finking" Pitsie looked towards me confused obviously he hadnt caught on

"About what?"

      "The club, Pitsie. Think about it" I put my head in my hands as Charlie spoke "the board of directors, the trustees and Mr. Nolan. Do you think for one moment they're gonna let this thing just low over? Schools go down because of things like this. They need a scapegoat" he finished as I sat up looking at him

      "But is Cameron that bad?" I asked looking around "I mean to rat us all out like that? Surely he wouldn't do that" the boys looked at me appreciatively as footsteps were heard and the door clicked open.

      The boys quickly put out their cigarettes apart from Charlie as I swatted away the smoke with Pitsie.

      Cameron came around the corner looking between us with a forced smile "Whats going on guys"

      I turned to look at todd as charlie stood up from his seat, walking towards where I was sat

     "You finked, didnt you, Cameron?" He threw his cigarette in the ashtray as Cameron stood like a deer in the headlight not making me very hopeful.

     "Finked? I dont know what you're talking about"

     Charlie began to walk closer to Cameron both standing just infront of Knox and I

       "You told Nolan everything about the club is what I'm talking about" both Meeks and I stood from our seats, getting closer to Charlie as Todd and Pitts stood too.

      "Look in case you hadnt heard, Dalton, theres something called an honour code at this school, all right?" My hopes for Cameron plummeted in those moments "if a teacher asks you a question, you tell the truth or you're expelled" my eyes widened as Meeks, Knox and I all reached out grabbing Charlie and pushing him back

      "You little punk" I had a grip on his arm as Knox stepped back

"Charlie!"

      "He's a rat! He's in it up to his eyes, so he ratted to save himself"

     "Dont touch him Charlie, you do and your out" Knox said from behind me, Charlie's head shot to look at Knox

"Im out anyways"

      "You dont know that" I said as he looked down to me "not yet"

      "Shes right there Charlie" Cameron said as I let go of Charlie my eyes going to Cameron "and if you guys are smart, you will do exactly what I did and cooperate" I was stood a little bit behind Charlie as I exchanged a look with him "they're not after us. We're the victims. Us and Neil"

    He had the nerve. I turned back to look towards where Todd was stood and I could see his head shaking

      "Whats that mean? Who are they after" Charlie asked as I crossed my arms

      "Why, Mr. Keating, of course. The 'captain' himself" Charlie and I looked at each other, both sharing a confused expression before looking back to Cameron "I mean, you guys didnt really think he could avoid responsibility, did you?"

      I stepped out from behind Charlie coming to stand a small bit infront of him "Mr. Keating, responsible for Neil? Is that what they're saying?" I could tell Cameron was surprised that Id spoken up

     "Well who else do you think, Sophie? The administration? Your father" yes "Mr. Keating put us up to all this crap, didnt he? If it wasn't for Mr. Keating, Neil would be cosied up in his room right now" Charlie's head turned to look at me as i looked off to the side, my blood boiling "studying his chemistry and dreaming of being called doct-"

"That's is not true Cameron, you know that" Todd said, finally speaking up as I moved away back towards where Pitts was standing "he didnt put us up to anything. Neil loved acting" I turned back to face the others as Charlie looked back towards me.

"Believe what you want but I say let Keating fry" I shook my head at Charlie, begging him not to do what he was about to do

'Dont' I mouthed to him as Cameron spoke up again

"I mean, why ruin our lives?" I shook my head once more before Charlie took a breath spun on his heels, fist raised as it collided with Cameron's nose. He fell back into the luggage as the boys reached forward pulling him back

"Charlie!"

"You dummy" Knox pushed Charlie back as Meeks kept a hold on him. I turned away facing Pitts as disappointment and anger flooded through my body.

"You just signed your expulsion papers, Nuwanda" Charlie turned back to face me, but I couldn't hide the disappointment in my eyes as I Shook my head scoffing.

Cameron stood from where he had been knocked down, looking between all of us "and if the rest of you are smart, you'll do exactly what I did. They know everything anyway" I shook my head once again as I stepped forward

"Who did you speak to?" He looked taken back by my question. I knew that Cameron wouldnt have came up with Keating on his own and Mr. Nolan had no inkling of anything got to do with Mr. Keating. The only person who did was...

"Your father and Mr. Nolan" there it was

"Is he still there now?" Cameron looked apprehensive but gave a nod as I shook my head and made my way towards the door

"You cant save Mr. Keating. Your fathers made up his mind" I turned and looked at Cameron

"But shouldn't we try?" Cameron shook his head and looked me dead in the eyes

"Sophie, how are you going to save Keating against your father? You couldnt save Neil" it was almost like when the words came out of his mouth, he instantly regretted them, because Charlie moved to hit him again and this time no one was stopping him. The boys didnt move to pull him back because they were suddenly going red with anger too.    

"Charlie stop" I said before his fist could collid with Cameron's face. He took a step back as I took one forward, my eyes trained on Cameron.

"You think I dont know that?"

"Sophie-"

"You think I dont regret the fact that I didnt catch onto Neil's lie until it was too late? You think that I dont regret not making him stay with me that night? that I dont regret not opening his door to see if he was okay? That I didn't lie awake for two days after he died thinking how much better it would be for everyone if it was me downstairs in the coffin instead of him" I said now standing close to him. His face faltered at the last one and I could see the boys faces in my peripheral vision drop

"No you dont Cameron because like I said before you dont think. And when you do its only about yourself. I couldn't save Neil, I know that. But I'm sure as hell not gonna stand by and not try save Keating" I said turning back towards the door and opening it ignoring the calls from behind me.

When I got to the office, Mr. and mrs Overstreet were sat outside. I looked at them confused as mrs Overstreet smiled at me before nodding to Mr. Nolan's office.

I pushed open the door to see him and my father sitting at the desk laughing with tea infront of them

"What are you trying to do?" I asked with the door shutting behind me as they looked at me startled from my sudden entrance

"Ms perry yo-"

"Why are you trying to get Mr. Keating fired?" I asked looking at my father. He stood with fury on his face

"Sophia"

"Is it because he actually believed in neil?" His eyes turned angry as he took a step closer to me, our voices raising

"It's because he's the reason your brother is dead"

"No he isn't" I shouted, "you are. You and your insane expectations for Neil to be exactly like you, are the reasons he's dead. Your constant belittling and nothing ever being enough. The controlling and the manipulation are all what drove him over the edge. I mean Jesus, You wanted to send him to military school because he acted in a play"

"That's enough Sophia"

"No it's not. Neil didn't get to say it when he was alive and I'm not gonna let you drive me into a shell like you did with him"

"Sophia!" His face was turning red with anger

"The reason you dont like Keating is because he was more of a father to Neil in the last three months than you've been in the last five years"

I didnt see it coming, or maybe I did and I just didnt want to stop it, but when his hand met my cheek and the slap echoed through the office I knew it was over. I held onto my face as my father stood there eyes wide, and Mr. Nolan looked between us.

"Sophia i-"

"I told you that when Neil goes that I'd leave too" I told him taking my hand away from my face "Congratulations father, you just lost both your kids in the space of five days"

I said turning away from the two of them and opened the door

"You killed your brother" my father said making me turn back "I know you were apart of this dead poets society. That's why he died"

I shook my head looking at him "No. That's why he lived"

I turned to leave the office and ran straight into a chest.

"My god boy what happened to you" I was suddenly pulled back to what happened upstairs a few minutes prior as I looked up to Cameron who was stood with a tissue up to his nose and a bruise beginning to form on his cheek.

Charlie, hit him again.

He looked down at me, his eyes going to the red mark on my cheek "do you see who you're defending?"

I pushed passed him and made my way up to the rooms. the boys were standing outside of their own when I got up the steps, their eyes widening when they saw my face.

"Sophi-" I ignored them as I made my way into the room. My breaths were too fast and the rage was building in me. The door clicked open the shut behind me

"Sophie" I turned to see Charlie stood there looking at me. "What the hell was that upstairs?"

"I could ask you the same thing" he stepped towards me with anger on his face

"No, dont turn this on me. You seriously thought that it would be better if you were the one who died?" He asked, with anger lacing his voice making me pull my head back

"Are you seriously angry at me right now? I'm not the one who just decked Cameron upstairs!"

"You heard what he was was saying, Sophie" his voice raised and we were getting louder with each word

"Oh and you just had to hit him. Twice!" I said shaking my head.

"I was defending you" he said pulling his eyes rows together and raising his hand and pointing at me

"Yeah and now you're leaving!" Realisation crossed Charlie's face. The muscles in his face relaxing as the angry expression turned into a sorry one

"Soph..." he moved towards me, trying to pull me into him but I couldn't bear to have him close right now.

"No Charlie, no!" I said fighting against him "I asked you not to get in trouble and you still went and got expelled!" I shouted at him as he stood speechless, tears entering both our eyes.

"Sophie" just hearing him say my name made me see red the tears spilling over my cheeks. I shook my head as I put out my hands hitting him in the chest pushing him backwards

"I told you I wouldn't be able to do this without you" another push  "You told me you wouldn't leave" another push "you promised!" he gripped onto my wrist holding me in place as I kept my eyes trained on his chest

    "Sophie" I looked up, our eyes connecting as I shook my head.

    "You promised me" I said but it was so quiet that I was surprised he even heard me. He pulled me into him and this time I didnt fight as I wrapped my arms around his middle.

    "I know. I'm sorry" he said leaving a kiss on my forehead.

     That's night was the last night that Charlie would be here at Welton. We stayed up for most of the night just talking and as he began to fall asleep I noticed the glass of water on my bedside table empty.

      I grabbed it and opened the door quietly, making my way towards the tap. My eyes fell on each of the doors as I passed and my gut is what made me twist open Meeks and Pitts door to check they were okay, both were sound asleep in their bed as I shut the door. My eyes fell on Knox's next. Like with Meeks I opened it and once I saw him fast asleep within I shut it.

       Thankfully sticks parents had brought him home for a few days so Knox had been on his own. I made my way towards Todd doing the same. He was fast asleep but was twisting and turning when I went in. I shut the door and my eyes fell on Charlie's door. Cameron was in there and what happened today made me ignore his door and go to fill up my drink.

      I passed his door on the way back but my gut seemed to be attached to a string that was pulling me back to his room. I rolled my eyes as I turned and opened his door slowly. He was asleep within and while I hadn't wanted to, I was glad I had checked.

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       The following day, Charlie was brough to Nolan's office where he was met with his parents and told to pack his bag and be ready in half an hour.

       I sat on his bed as he packed up, everything into his bags. Knox helped him and when it came time to go, Knox, Meeks and I helped him to bring the bags out to the car.

      Mrs Dalton gave her soon a disapproving look but that soon dropped when she saw me and gave to give me hug. She pulled away, her fingertips grazing over the small scrape on my cheek as she shook her head.

"I'll see you soon Sophia"

     "Bye mrs" I stopped myself as she gave me a look "Eleanor" she smiled as she got back into the car as Charlie finished his exchanges with Knox and Meeks. Both of them turning and going back inside

      He came down the steps to stand infront of me. The tears coated my eyes, knowing I wouldn't get to see home everyday. Wouldn't wake up and see him or go to sleep with him beside me. Wouldn't be able to look to my left in English and see his shit eating grin. Charlie would probably get shipped off to another boarding school somewhere else.

     My mind went back to the conversation we had a few weeks l

      "You know this means your not gonna graduate" he smiled at my words as he leaned forward resting his head against mine

     "I don't care, I'm still gonna marry you Sophie" I smiled at him as he leaned to kiss me "I promise"

     I pulled away before he could kiss me "you're not very good at those are you?" I asked as he shook his head

     "I'm not breaking this one" he leaned down kissing me before pulling away, his eyes glistening with tears making me smile

"Don't cry"

     "I'm really gonna miss you" he said as I leaned up kissing him again "and sleeping in your bed" I slapped his chest as he gave me one last kiss before taking a step back

"I love you Sophia Julie Perry"

"I love you Charlie Oliver Dalton"

     "Deeply and completely?" I smiled at him as he looked at me with a raised eyebrow

      "Deeply and completely" he stepped down the steps and walked to his car, taking one look back before smiling and getting into the car.

      I watched as it drove off, the tears falling down my cheeks as Knox came out into the snow, pulling me into a hug and bringing me back inside.

      "Where's Meeks?" I asked as we went up the steps to the rooms

      "Gone with Hager" he told me as I nodded slightly, both of us branching off into our rooms awaiting the questioning.

      I was sat in my room for an hour before my name was called. I stepped out to see Hager stood at the top of the steps waiting firmly for me to join him.

     I walked ahead of him into Mr. Nolan's office. Mr. Nolan sat at the desk. My eyes widening when I saw my mother and father sitting on this side of it

     "Ms Perry, please take a seat" I sat opposite of the man as he sighed and took off his glasses "Ms perry, I can't even begin to imagine what you have gone through over the past few days and what you will go through over the next few weeks"

      "But I must ask you to read over this and sign it"

      I shook my head looking down at the sheet "no"

"No?" My eyes met Mr. Nolan's

      "No. I won't sign it. Mr. Keating isn't to blame for this and I won't sign something that says he is it's not fair" I told him, my eyes going to my mother who looked heartbroken

      "Ms Perry, you have two options, sign the paper and all will be forgotten. Or don't sign it and allow you and your fellow classmates that are involved to be expelled" I looked at Mr. Nolan with a glare as my mother placed a hand on my arm

     "Sophia, please" I thought about it for a moment before picking up the pen and scribbling my name beneath it.

     "Well done Sophia, you've done the right thing" Mr. Nolan said with a smile

"Have I?"

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     I got ready for bed that night, like I usually did. Only this time, Charlie wasnt going to be in with me and I wouldn't be going to say goodnight to Neil. It felt empty.

      I had slept like this before Charlie but now it just seemed wrong. I lay there for a while tossing and turning before a small knock came to my door. I looked towards it as it opened and I switched in my small bedside table light.

"You okay Todd?"

"I can't sleep" he told me standing by the door cautiously

     "You can stay in here if you want, I can't really sleep either" I said moving over so I was closer to the wall. He climbed in beside me and stayed quiet for a few moments

     "Is it going to get better? Ever?" He asked turning to look at me. I smiled and turned to look at the ceiling

      "I sure hope so, cause if it's like this for the rest our lives we're fucked" he laughed a small bit before going quiet again "Todd, I can't imagine what your going through but your really strong. I don't even want to know what it would be like to lose Charlie the way you lost Neil"

     He turned to smile at me before shaking his head "Can I ask you Something?" I nodded as he took a breath "how did you not cry way more after what happened?"

     "I was numb, I think I cried so much the first day that I genuinely had no more tears" I said with a small smile "I was also in denial about Neil's death. I think that I thought If I shut Everyone out it wouldn't actually be happening" I told him he nodded to me before another Knock came to my door

"I saw your light on"

     "Can't sleep either?" Todd asked the boy standing in the doorway with a pillow in his hand.

"No"

      "Cmon then" Knox lay across the bottom of the bed pulling the extra quilt over him.

      We were all beginning to doze off when another knock