"y/n!" came the first call of my name.

groaning, i replied back. "what?"

...

a few seconds passed and no response.

"ugh," i threw my blankets off and made for the door, but not before noticing the ache in my legs, closer to my hips.

"mom?" i walked to my door, eyes still closed.

"y/n, come eat!"

"oh my god," i muttered quietly to myself.

"what did you say?"

how the hell did she not hear me yelling but she heard that.

"nothing!" i pulled on a sweater, hoping that the collar would cover the hickies on my neck.

padding softly, i went downstairs, with the slightest limp. the smell of breakfast wafted through the air, freshly cut up fruits sitting in a bowl and warm fluffy pancakes piled on a plate.

"morning," i mumbled and my words were followed by a yawn.

"morning," my mom placed a kiss on my forehead, "are you limping?"

i stopped in my tracks, "um, no? i mean, yes?"

"what happened?" my mom asked and sent me into a flurry to try to think up an excuse.

"i was..." i started, "i ran into my dresser. wait, i slept wrong and then ran into my dresser."

the excuse had too many holes in it and i knew my mom wouldn't believe it. but instead, she sighed.

"you're a dancer, you'd think you'd know better." my mom said, turning back around to pour her batter on the pan.

absentmindedly, i nodded in agreement.

then it struck me, hard, and nearly blew all the wind out of me.

she turned around, only slightly, to see my reaction.

"i was waiting for you to tell me, but it didn't seem like you would anytime soon." she said, sadness laced in her words, and i could only feel the guilt from when the lie first started resurface.

"mom, i-"

"no, don't apologize, y/n. i was the one who made it hard for you to come to me about this, i should've been more open and i should've considered that this is what you wanted to do."

the tears pricked at my eyes. what a great way to start the day.

"now, don't go cry on me," my mom pointed her spatula at me.

i got up and gave her a hug. "thank you so much. for everything."

she rubbed at my back with her unoccupied hand, "just promise to invite me to your next performance."

i pulled away, nodding vigorously.

"also, there's something for you in the entryway. it was dropped off this morning."

curious to see what it was, i headed over. sure enough, like my mom had said, there was a small basket of flowers on the entryway table.

they were gorgeous. red and pink roses arranged among red tulips and violets, small forget-me-nots sprinkled here and there. i don't know how i missed them when i walked by to get to the kitchen.

there was also a card resting against the basket. i picked it up to read it and noticed the small orange blossom flower pinched to the letter.

saw these n thought of you.
i gave your mom some too but to apologize for what we did in her poor closet.
she doesn't know they're an apology though

anyways, take care
i'll be thinking about you until the next time i see you
- h. shinsou

i brushed my fingertips against the bloomed buds, the touch moving them.

"is he courting you?"

"mom!" i yelped, spinning around so fast i nearly bumped into the table. "you scared me, why are you sneaking up on people?"

"ah, don't be dramatic." she rolled her eyes, "and don't avoid the question, is he courting you?"

"i don't think so." i thumbed the card behind my back.

"well, clearly you two have fixed something. when he got to the party yesterday, the first thing he did was ask for you. well, one of the first things. that boy has manners."

"what... what else did he do?" i asked sheepishly but was still curious.

"let me think," my mom began, making her way back towards the kitchen. "well, he asked for you and i told him you hadn't come downstairs yet. yo was also there and he offered to go get you but hitoshi shut him down and he went instead."

i followed behind her, as to not miss what she was saying. "and then?"

"the rest you know. you both went your separate ways, no? i didn't see the two of you together the whole party but he was the one who told me that you were in your room. not sure how he knew. oh, wait-

"he went looking for you after the party, i told him you were in the waiting room." she remembered, "but yes, that's about it, dear."

"right," i said, slightly disappointed. "anyways, what are we doing today, mom?"

"i was thinking we could go down to the outlets, there's only a few weeks before we go to hoshi's party and you plan on bringing gifts, right?"

"oh, right! i bought tai's already but i still need one for hoshi and shinsou... dosei too!"

"well, then hurry and eat breakfast so you can go get ready."

-

my mom and i ended up being out all day, eating lunch at a restaurant then deciding to bring home leftovers in case we got hungry for dinner.

the outlets had a variety of gifts and i could mark off the majority of shinsou's family off my list of gifts, with the expectation of shinsou himself.

maybe it was the fact that this was our first official holiday season together that set an anxious feeling in my stomach, but i didn't want to give the boy just any meaningless gift.

"alright, i'm going to settle down for the night, y/n." my mom made her way upstairs as i stood around in the kitchen, waiting for the microwave to finish heating up my food.

"goodnight, mom."

the microwave beeped loudly and i opened the little door.

i sat on a stool, my plate on the kitchen island, and ate in the quiet for a couple of minutes.

a message from mina chimed from my phone, it was a picture of her little sister who was clearly styled by her.

'my sister saw your dress from that party 2 halloween's ago and would not let me sleep until i let her wear it, she wanted your opinion on it though'

'she looks better than i did! looks like she knows a pretty good stylist too'

as soon as i hit send, my phone started to buzz, my ringtone breaking the silence of the night. it was shinsou.

"hello?"

"hey, pretty girl." shinsou sighed on the other end, seemingly happy i answered.

"hi, hitoshi."

"what are you up to?" he asked, shuffling on the other side of the phone.

"well, besides having a late dinner, not much. what about you?" i sighed, no longer hungry for the food.

"well, i couldn't stop thinking about you so i decided to call. i just realized how late it is though, sorry."

"it's fine, i wasn't doing anything else."

"in that case, let's go out?"

"right now?" i asked, nearly choking at the question.

"what? scared of a little fun?" i could hear the smirk in his voice. "don't worry, i won't let anything happen to you."

i hummed softly at the promise, feeling warm. "more like tired, pretty boy. but i'm not completely opposed to the idea of hanging out soon."

"ah," shinsou acknowledged, "right. i dropped by in the morning, your mom said you guys were going out. how'd it go?"

"it went well, i bought a few things but we got home pretty late." i got up, clearing my plate off and going to wash it.

"do you want me to hang up and let you go to sleep?"

"no, no," i held the phone to my ear with my shoulder to avoid putting it on speaker and to keep shinsou's voice closer. "i..."

"you what, princess?"

"nothing, i just... i still want to talk to you." i admitted, placing my dishes off on the side of the sink to dry.

"that's all you had to say, pretty girl." shinsou murmured close to my ear before continuing, "let me tell you! dosei started speaking recently and she learned my name. well, she says it more like 'oshi' but you know."

i smiled at shinsou's enthusiasm and genuine fondness towards his siblings.

"tai is also going through a bug phase for some reason. but with the weather being colder, he doesn't find many."

shinsou rambled on about his family as i headed upstairs and got ready for bed.

the boy was still talking by the time i got into bed.

"you still there, pretty girl?" shinsou paused after a moment.

"yeah, i just got into bed." i mumbled.

"should i hang up?"

"no, we still have to plan to meet up tomorrow, don't we?" i felt my eyes droop closed.

"of course. what do you want to do?"

"wanna see you."

"okay, we can do that. you should probably go to sleep, though. we'll talk about it tomorrow, okay?" shinsou's concern bled through the phone and was obvious.

"why not now?"

"because you're falling asleep on me, pretty girl. and plus, i need you to be fully aware of our plan. cant have you standing me up, now can i?" he reasoned, laughter light in his words.

"that's a good point." i agreed but was reluctant to have shinsou go, even if he was just on the phone.

as if shinsou sensed my hesitation, he made an offer. "i'll tell you about something funny that happened today but you have to promise you'll go to sleep soon, okay?"

"okay, yes."

and as he continued, my responses got shorter and shorter as my words became more slurred, just further proving shinsou's point about going to sleep.

"but i think if we- y/n?" the boy asked and i did it hear him but i was already dozing off.

i missed the chuckle in shinsou's equally tired voice and his goodnight. but even though i did, that didn't stop me from dreaming about his voice and all his soft words, softer than my pillow.

~

a/n: hi hi !!

i don't think i have much to say but i do want to thank you guys, like always, for everything !! i love reading all ur guys comments and hear what you guys think about the story !

thank u sm for reading, the comments, the votes n adding ruthless to ur lists

take care and stay safe !! i love u guys sm, mwah !!! <3