Just as Caitlin has said, I'd healed quicker when I let people help me. It was hard opening up to the help, but even the small help I allowed, it worked.

Team GB had met up for a camp to train and practise set pieces for the Olympics. We'd all worked hard as well as had fun. Beth, Rachel, Millie and I had a few good laughs with one another before we were taken to Tokyo.

The Olympic Villiage was nothing like what I expected. There were hundreds to thousands of athletes from different countries.

Our team was in group E with Japan, Canada and Chile. The group stages games has gone alright and I was tired to say the least. Coming back from an injury to then being shipped off to the Olympics was hard and it took a lot of energy.

I lay on my stomach on my bed in my team GB tracksuit. I was definitely missing Beth, but I would never tell her that as it would make her even more insufferable.

My phone buzzed and I smiled at the notification.

𝙆𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙚 🤩

𝙃𝙤𝙬'𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙊𝙡𝙮𝙢𝙥𝙞𝙘 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙩𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜
𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧?

𝙋𝙧𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙮 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙!
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙫𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙜𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙖𝙢𝙖𝙯𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙩.
𝙎𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙧𝙮𝙣𝙖 𝙬𝙧𝙖𝙥 𝙢𝙮 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙖𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙
𝙗𝙚𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚, 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪?
𝙃𝙤𝙬'𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙤𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙚 𝙨𝙞𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣?

𝙎𝙖𝙢𝙚, 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡.
𝙐𝙣𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙪𝙣𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙡𝙮, 𝙢𝙮 𝙨𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧'𝙨 𝙢𝙮
𝙧𝙤𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙣𝙤𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙖
𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙘𝙠, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙙𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙮, 𝙄'𝙡𝙡 𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙫𝙞𝙫𝙚.
𝙄'𝙢 𝙖 𝙛𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙚𝙧 💪

𝙄 𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙨 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙃𝙤𝙪𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙣 𝙙𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙖𝙡𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙮.

𝙍𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩? 𝙒𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧.
𝙄𝙩 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙨 𝙨𝙤 𝙙𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪.

𝙒𝙝𝙤 𝙖𝙢 𝙄 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙞𝙣
𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤?

𝙔𝙤𝙪'𝙡𝙡 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚.
𝙔𝙤𝙪'𝙧𝙚 𝙆𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙚 𝙈𝙚𝙬𝙞𝙨, 𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚
𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙪𝙥 𝙩𝙤 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙨.
𝘽𝙪𝙩 𝙄 𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙩𝙤𝙤, 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡.

𝙂𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 😜
𝘽𝙪𝙩 𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙤𝙪𝙨𝙡𝙮, 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪
𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙪𝙥? 𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙨𝙚𝙚𝙢 𝙖 𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙤𝙛𝙛
𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙄𝙣𝙨𝙩𝙖 𝙥𝙞𝙘𝙨.
𝘼𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙?

𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙤𝙤 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙡.
𝙄𝙩'𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮.
𝙅𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙪𝙨𝙪𝙖𝙡 𝙊𝙡𝙮𝙢𝙥𝙞𝙘 𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙚𝙨...

𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙢𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙛𝙛,
𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙄'𝙢 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙖𝙡𝙠
𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢.

𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩'𝙨 𝙖𝙡𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙙𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙠𝙚𝙚𝙥
𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙤𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙞𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙩
𝙩𝙤 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙩𝙤𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙮.

𝙄'𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙘𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩,
𝙢𝙮 𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙛𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙆𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙣.

𝙔𝙤𝙪'𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚.
𝙄 𝙜𝙤𝙩𝙩𝙖 𝙜𝙤 𝙣𝙤𝙬, 𝙎𝙖𝙢'𝙨 𝙩𝙧𝙮𝙣𝙖 𝙙𝙧𝙖𝙜
𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙬𝙝𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙢𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙚 𝙬𝙚
𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙢𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝙪𝙥 𝙨𝙤𝙤𝙣. 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙩𝙚𝙡𝙡
𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙧 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚...

𝙆𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙣 𝘼𝙣𝙣𝙚 𝙈𝙚𝙬𝙞𝙨 , 𝙖𝙧𝙚
𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚? 😍

𝙈𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙚 👀

I smile once more at my phone before I place it down on the bed. It was growing darker outside and I didn't feel at all tired. We had a big game tomorrow, quarter finals against Australia. I was nervous. I'd have to verse two of my Arsenal teammates, Caitlin and Steph. What was even fun was that I live with Steph back at home. Though I knew we wished the best for one another out there.

I lay there on the bed for a few minutes just thinking until I got a wild idea. I picked up my phone and sent a message to a certain Aussie.

𝘾𝙖𝙞𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙣

𝙃𝙚𝙮, 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙧𝙚𝙚?

𝙔𝙚𝙖𝙝, 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩'𝙨 𝙪𝙥.

𝙄'𝙢 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧.

𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙢𝙚𝙖𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪'𝙧𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤
𝙗𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙠 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙊𝙡𝙮𝙢𝙥𝙞𝙘 𝙑𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙜𝙚 𝙧𝙪𝙡𝙚𝙨 𝙗𝙮
𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙖 𝙙𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙢'𝙨 𝙛𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙨.

𝙀𝙭𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙡𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 😃

I rummaged through my suitcase until I found a black top. I threw it on with a pair of leggings to get out of my Team GB tracksuit as to not make it obvious I was about to walk across the Olympic Villiage into another country's flats.

I left my room, quietly, trying not to draw attention to myself. I greeted the other olympians from our team and left the building, making my way across to the Australia building.

When I made it, I texted Caitlin to come down and get me since you needed a keycard for the team buildings to stop exactly what I was doing.

"You're actually going to get yourself disqualified." Caitlin says as she pulls me into the building and into the lift to go up to the floor where the Matilda's were staying.

When the door's opened, I instantly scrunched my nose up at who was infront of the doors. "Helooo, Steffy." I tried acting normal.

"Elena, are you trying to get killed?" Steph says as she pulls me out of the lift. "You and me are gonna have a serious chat later."

"Steph, stop being such a pest." A younger player says beside her. "Hi, I'm Kyra." She holds her hand out for me to shake and I smile while I do.

"Thank you for being on my side." I say to Kyra with a mischievous smile.

"I think it's cool you snuck in here."

"And that is exactly why I did not want you two to run into each other in the villiage." Steph shakes her head as she pulls Kyra into the lift and Caitlin pulls me down the coridoor.

"Hi, Hayley." I see the Matilda who I'd spoken to during Caitlin and Lia's dinner.

"Hey, Elena." Hayley waves at me as she unlocks her room door. "Wait, what is she doing here?" I hear her say and I laugh.

Caitlin pushes me into her room and locks the door. "Elena!"

"That's my name. Elena Daisy Pugh." I smile at her, widely.

"Daisy?" She asks, learning what my middle name is.

"Yeah, it was my mother's name." I say with a sad tone. "Anyway, I thought we could talk because I was bored and you're free-"

"Shh." Caitlin shushes me. "Just come here." The Aussie pulls me to stand beside her bed while she pulls out her suitcase from underneath. I watch her rumage through it until she finds something small and finally closes it again and turns back to me. "I got you a small birthday present." She says as she stands up to meet my eyes.

"Caitlin, you really didn't have to." I shake my head, but she grabs my hand and opens it, placing something inside. I look down at the object in my hand and smile when I see a small bracelet. I turn it over and look at the small number 19 in my hands. On the other side a number 14 hangs down from it. Our Arsenal numbers. "This is really cute." I say as my eyes meet hers and I see her shoulders relax.

"I wasn't sure you'd like it."

"Just shut up and put it on me." I smile at her as I hold out my wrist. "Thank you."

I follow Caitlin our to her balcony. We sit down on the floor against the door, looking over the Olympic Villiage. Tokyo was an incredibly beautiful place and the Olympic Villiage added onto it.

I turn my head to look at Caitlin, but I can tell by the way her shoulders have dropped and the bags under her eyes that something's up. "Caitlin?" She turns her head to me and hums in response. "Is everything okay?"

Caitlin shrugs. "Lia and I broke up."

"I'm sorry." Is all I know what to say. I shuffle closer to her and put a comforting arm around her. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

"I don't know. I'm still confused. I mean, I think we've both known for the past few months that our relationship was coming to an end. During lockdown it was different, it was refreshing. I'd moved into her place so that we'd both have a little company during the pandemic and we ended up falling in love. I guess we had an expiry date." Caitlin looks down at her arms wrapped around her knees. "Relationships are so complicated."

"I know." My mind goes back to Ona. I was such a shitty girlfriend.

"Do you... like girls?" Caitlin asks me slowly as she looks up into my eyes.

I look away for a moment. "Yeah." I let out with a breath.

"You don't seem that proud of it." Caitlin says, quietly.

"I've only dated one girl in my life. Back at Houston, though she wasn't actually from America." I begin explaining. I would've never shared this with anyone, but Caitlin was different. I felt like I could tell her things, like I could let my walls down and be vulnerable, be human in front of her. "We were doing okay with the long distance, though it wasn't ideal. I visited her during my break before preseason. I told her I loved her for the first time and then she came to visit in America the next time. I told her I'd introduce her to my dad." I pause for a moment, feeling a lump form in my throat. "My dad's super religious. The type of guy that never misses a Sunday Mass and if he does he prays for forgiveness and does some community service to make up for it." I laugh, lightly, though it's forced. "He, umm, didn't approve of the whole loving a girl situation and never spoke to me again after that dinner, never came to any one of my games." Caitlin holds my arm that's around her, tracing small shapes on my hand with her thumb. "I don't know why I was stupid enough to believe he would accept me-"

"Hey." Caitlin stops me and turns me to look at her. She sees the tears forming on my lower lid and pulls me into a hug. I shuffle to get closer to her as the tears I've held in for so long finally fall.

I'd never told anyone about Ona. No one at all. She was always my little secret. After that dinner, she'd felt extremely bad for me, I told her it was okay because I had her, but she wanted something more. She wanted us to stop being a secret, but in the fear of not being accepted by the world like I wasn't with my dad, I slowly made us drift apart until she finally stopped trying to reach out to me. I understood why she was angry at me. She had a right to be. I was hurt and I pushed that onto her.

Caitlin holds me and doesn't say anything. The silence is nice, comforting. Just her presence is enough to make me feel better.

I couldn't help but think about everything I'd been through. I never met my mum, my dad didn't accept me for who I was and I'd lost one of the best people in my life. I'm a shitty person, I don't deserve to be happy.

"Elena, you're loved and accepted by everyone." Caitlin tells me. It's harder to believe when my dad used to be my everyone and now I hadn't talked to him in 2 years and I didn't even know if he was still living in America or came back to England when he stopped supporting me. Caitlin pulls me away from her and holds my face in her hands so she can look me in the eyes while she speaks. "The Arsenal girls and coaches all love you and so do the England ones. You were loved back at Houston and you're definitely accepted by them all aswell. Respectfully, I say fuck your dad if he doesn't accept you. You can't change who you like so, you have to embrace it, okay?" I nod my head and Caitlin lets go off me, letting me cry on her shoulder again.

We stay there for a few more moments until I finally pull away and wipe my tears away. I could feel my eyes were hot and puffy from crying, but I couldn't do anything about that now. "Thank you, Caitlin." I say from the bottom of my heart. "We play each other tomorrow." I avert the conversation back to a normal topic while we sit against the door to the balcony, Caitlin's hand wrapped around mine against the cold floor as we look up at the sky together. The Tokyo sky was clear and you could see the stars and the moon above us. My eyes skipped across them, connecting them with my gaze.

"Quarter finals." Caitlin says. "As long as we try our bests, I'll be proud of both of us."

"Same." I agree. "Promise we won't hold anything against each other when we get back home." I hold out my pinky finger and Caitlin wraps hers around mine.

"Promise."