Florid, for those unaware so far: having a red or flushed complexion. It's not a name, it's just all Sakurai immediately called it.

it's just most often referred to as the demon, he, or she, or it.

[鮮やかな思い出]

The demon did not manifest because Sakurai was on the verge of death. It manifested only because Sakurai's anger grew so great at being unable to protect Inosuke on her own that she resorted to using demon Florid's strength. That healed her instantly, because "Father" even almost took her leg off and broke her back before she was knocked out.

Curse you, stupid demon!

"Actually, your wounds are healed from your battle before Shinazaguwa, but your leg bone is still broken, it looks like it's partially healed but you were walking on it, so..."

Sakurai stood blank faced on the bed. How could she not have felt it? In what world is it possible for someone to walk on a broken leg—

*intentionally questioning anime
logic

Kanao was here, quiet as ever when she met her. This wasn't Sakurai's first visit to the butterfly estate, because she was beyond weak during her training prior to the selection and needed medical intervention to get her properly on her feet. Kanazaki Aoi was of course the one informing her of her fractures and injuries, but hers weren't anything in comparison to the others. Her hair was in twin tails and she was small for her age. She had passed the selection but was to afraid to face the demons outside, so remained here.

Zenitsu was apparently bitten by a demon spider that was transforming him, and now he took medication to revert him back because his legs and arms had become extremely short. Inosuke still had his windpipe nearly crushed, and his wounds were healing up. Tanjiro had so many abrasions and muscle tears he could hardly move.

"Thank you... for saving me," Inosuke coughed out, his voice nearly destroyed after his pipe was crushed.

"Don't worry about it," Sakurai said, who was sure he was looking ghastly under his boar head. She was not happy to be in two casts while laying down. Even with brittle bones back when she had to re-train, her bones didn't break.

But also, Shinazugawa was a bitch.

"You saw it then? Her demon form? What does it look like, is she still cute? Is she scary?" Zenitsu cried.

"Like... a pink fox," Inosuke said. "Fox ears for horns."

Sakurai looked over. "That's my own blood influencing the demon, it's not a fox demon at all."

"Is your demon nice like Nezuko at all?" Tanjiro asked.

"No, she sucks and only helps keep us alive because she wants to take my body. I can't even call her a "she", they take on a lot of different forms but mostly as my mother. She hates me, I killed her full possession vessel first, then sealed the will in a sword, then suppressed her will myself for four hundred years. She's an ex-kizuki but she's not much now. But she's devoured many humans—the demon art possession eats away at the anger in people's hearts until their soul is hers."

Excuse me? I helped you kill that demon and save that stupid boar!

"She always talks in my head but I usually ignore her."

Screw you! I'll make you regret it one day when I get this body! I'll have your sun blessed blood! I'll have more power that Kibutsuji!

Oh, so you don't mind killing Kibutsuji with me?

I mind! I'll die too! If we find the blue spider lily, its way better than your body! Way better than his power! I'll be immortal on my own! I will have my own body again!

Not interested.

"Is that face of frustration because you're talking right now?" Tanjiro asked.

Sakurai looked up with a blank expression. "Is it that obvious?" The bed creaked as she shifted uncomfortably, looking down for another topic. "Is Nezuko healing now?" she said at once, changing the subject from her demon.

"Yes, she's sleeping in her box... probably for a while," Tanjiro said.

Sakurai had watched out for Zenitsu taking his medication because he seemed to always forget if he had or hadn't. Five times a day was brutal, but it was necessary. Inosuke was completely depressed.

"You did great, Inosuke! Come on!" they said as words of encouragement to him.

As well as a visitor, Murata their senior from the mountain. He told them of how he had to speak with the pillars and report, but he was scared witless. Even more so when Shinobu came in, he bolted just as quickly.

"How are your bodies doing?" she asked with her bright smile.

"A lot better, actually!" Tanjiro said, though Sakurai's arm was still pretty broken.

"Then let's begin your functional recovery!" she said.

Only Inosuke, Sakurai, and Tanjiro could participate. Sakurai just barely.

They were forced to be stretched out by three young girls of the estate. Then play with Kanao and Aoi in games of tag and a game where they had to grab a cup and splash their opponent first with medicated broth.

The stretching wasn't horrible, they left alone the still healing arm. The previously broken leg hurt not cause of soreness but the lack of muscle that had been lost lying down.

Then came the splashing game, and Sakurai picked up on it almost immediately and splashed water right in Aoi's face. She couldn't cover the cups to keep her opponent from lifting with one hand, but that most certainly wasn't her downfall against Kanao.

What she'd given up on in her body state a year ago was what Kanao did now. Total concentration breathing at all times. It made her unbeatable.

Tanjiro and Inosuke were worn out at the end, but that wouldn't stop Sakurai from trying to concentrate her breathing outside on her own.

It felt like being pounded by gravity, holding onto it for two minutes and nearly collapsing. She rolled over, gasping for air. How had she managed it at thirteen, four hundred years ago? It would be a nice thing for her muscle memory to kick in now.

Something her mother had taught her about breathing to perform kagura annually. To remain in a state of focus to dance for hours on the mountain, Sakurai learned it young. It's what saved her in the battle against Florid—who'd taken full control of her mother.

You think it was easy taking over a full-blown miko of your bloodline? You think I'm the one who killed her? You think she even died? Florid snapped in her head. Her iron will will never let me actually kill you. You're the one who cut my possession and destroyed the best vessel I had before I even got her. You probably left a good portion of her soul, It's why my appearance got so messed up by your stupid family. If you need help, figure it out from your memories of her. I don't want you dying on me either. I'll find a way to break you.

"That's why Sayuri could remain with me even now..." Sakurai said out loud. "So, mother too, huh?"

"Sakurai, what made you become a demon slayer? I mean, before you woke up in the Taisho era?" Shinobu asked her one morning. "Oyakata-sama said the Breath of Sun user was your teacher. Why did you learn?"

"Oh," Sakurai looked down as Shinobu removed the cast from her arm. "I learned breathing from Yoriichi, but I knew how to slay demons long before that. It was my fate to protect the village from demons, it was with the priestesses of my family. The sword... the fighting... I used to feel guilty about how free I felt chasing after a demon, but now it's my way of living. I make a use with what I'm given. Although I seek revenge, I enjoy my life. I don't have to force a smile around anyone, and I can cry even though we slayers are protectors, I still am allowed."

"Revenge for whom?"

Sakurai turned her head up, gazing at Shinobu's infallible smile that seemed to cut off her constant anger. The same way Sakurai felt, but even worse seeing how strong a pillar was. Yet this was the emotion all pillars felt.

"My younger sister, Sayuri. She grew up for the rest of her life without me, and fought Kibutsuji to the death, to try and save me from my indefinite prison. Without me, before me, fighting, she died. He stole her life, Kibutsuji, before her dreams were realized. As I told the master, I'll cut his head and burn it directly in the sun. That's my reason for still living with a demon inside me."

Shinobu cocked her head. "You have more than that, though, don't you?"

Sakurai turned her head slightly, resigning to the lack of emotion she carried in her village to hide the sadness she hadn't left bare for a while. "Do you?"

The anger leaked a little, Shinobu's brow furrowed. "I have my younger adoptive sister, and she's my tsuguko. I have everyone here at the estate. I have the pillars. My sister died at the hands of a kizuki, and I see people killed all the time by the demons. You and I can't forgive that, but even as that drives me and other pillars I can't forget about the life I've been given and all the good things in it."

Sakurai faced the window. "I should be grateful for my life, for those around me. I am, but I feel distant... because I'm in Japan, but it's a foreign world." The window is glass? That's affordable these days too? "Gyomei may have offered his life, because he wanted to force me to see that I still have something of worth besides my revenge. But—killing Muzan, who also does not belong in this world, is the only way I feel "connected". I don't fight alone, but it's the only way I feel—Sorry, Shinobu-san, I've taken up too much of your time." Sakurai stood up once the bandages were removed, bowing and seeing herself out.

Their functional recovery went on, with Sakurai being able to use both hands and succeeded in winning against Aoi, but without her breathing mastery, it was impossible to touch Kanao. Sakurai had the sheer speed of her reactions—developed through quick draws but she couldn't read Kanao's own speed.

"Why do your scrawny hands move so fast, huh? You covered a cup today, you cut that big spider demon up in seconds! What's up with your style, huh?" Inosuke demanded in the hospital wing.

"... Training? Yoriichi was faster—it didn't require full focus breathing all the time."

"Who the hell is that?!"

"Full focus all the time?" Tanjirou asked and Sakurai nodded. "Can you do that?"

"Not anymore. I'm trying to recall how to maintain it, but my body's metabolism is shrewd so fighting by already makes me feel like my bones will collapse. So for now," she sparkles with her fists clenched determinedly, "I need to fix my terrible stamina!"

"Let's try full focus together, then!"

They sat in the dusk of the courtyard after many attempts, sweating in the grass.

"Tanjiro," Sakurai began, getting her last pant out before a full sigh. "Can I ask about your family? What happened that your sister became a demon... Don't say anything if you like, but I have a feeling it's something you and Nezuko have bore alone for a while." He didn't speak, so she rolled over in the grass to her belly, looking at him lay back and stare upwards at the starry night. "I don't mean the bad things. Do you have other siblings?"

"I had three brothers and one other younger sister. Nezuko and I were the oldest, living with our mother. Our father died of illness, so I would always sell the coal in town. I sometimes would carry them down the mountain with me."

"Wow! No wonder you're so strong! Carrying coal and your younger siblings, you're an older brother to be envious of!" Sakurai exclaimed.

"I was coming back in the snow, however, one morning. I smelled blood from the bottom, when I had stayed the night at a neighbour's because he deemed it too dangerous to travel at night due to superstitions of demons. I was too late. If I had been there that night—"

"You would have died too," Sakurai cut him off. "You lived and you saved your sister. If you had faced Muzan you would have been cut down. But now you have Nezuko." Under the stars, her head turned and flashed a pained smile. "Our paths are woven in strange ways. So was the answer given to me..."

He shut his eyes, then turned, looking at the sky. "I'm grateful that I still have Nezuko... what about your family?"

"Mine? Well, we were close but my mothers death made us become distant. I was always closest to my younger sister because she looked up to me more than anyone else, and we had the most contact. I've never explained who I am, have I? I was a miko priestess, I lead my village like the chief, from twelve years old, but often was isolated up in the mountains where only women of my family were allowed," she explained.

"How old was your sister? If you've never told anyone about your previous life, why not me?"

A sigh escaped her. She had never spilled her entire story before—not what it meant to her and her feelings at least—only facts. "I'll tell you all, but... Can I vent, Tanjiro? We have only just met, and I don't mean for you to take these matters to heart."

His surprise was replaced by a soft smile. "Well, if you wish to I won't take yours thoughts too deeply."

She sat up with him. "Sayuri was one year younger than me. If we had lived together, she would have been Nezuko's age now with me. What brought me here, to this era, alone... I was going to marry an Ubuyashiki before I was sealed. My sister was possessed by this demon, so I did all to save her. She killed my father with her grudge influenced by the demon, because of how he asked me to do things I didn't like. Because I didn't want to kill another person I loved. Because I didn't know how easy it was to have saved my mother, so I killed her before she had even been fully possessed and sealed her. I didn't have the guts to help her even if it killed me like you did for your sister, all I could do was shut my eyes and cut her neck. I was in love with Haganezuka's ancestor, but I ran away from him for my sister. My best friends were Yoriichi Tsugukuni and his twin brother and his friend, your ancestor. Everyone of them—dead. Everyone."

She sat up straight, grabbing him by the shoulders. "I told you this, because you also bore a lot of responsibility. To everyone now, I'm just a child who can't communicate in proper Japanese. Shinobu tells me it's wrong to feel disconnected from this life, and looks down on my lack of will to truly live. Tell me, how am I to live out a life that is so riddled by mistakes that everyone I loved waited for me until they withered away—they fought so hard to bring me back that they were killed by Muzan!

"Why couldn't I be like you Tanjiro-san? What could I have done to protect my sister? What am I left to do now? It should have been my sister to live out!"

She feared him to break away at the outburst of her emotions, her hands grabbing briefly at his collar before dropping, turning her head down in embarassment. She wiped at her tears. "I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to hear this, Tanjiro."

But his hand dropped on her shoulder, and his face emitted such a peaceful glow as he smiled at her. "You have the strength to protect families like yours, so that parents, children, and siblings don't suffer as you did. You have understanding and wisdom at such a young age--and you no longer bear the weight of pain that Muzan brought you alone. All demon slayers shoulder it with you."

Her heart tremored, realizing while she had kept her feelings pent up, that so had everyone else. It was so selfish of her to demand guidance and comfort from those who suffered like her and were forced to bear it. She had done it to Gyomei, Shinobu, and Tanjiro. If she had killed her self like she wanted to, without Gyomei stopping her, it would only prove that she had no regard for others struggles.

Slowly, she came to her feet and offered a hand to Tanjiro to help him up. "I cannot explain why, Tanjiro-san, but I have seen it in other people too. You give everyone a warm feeling. Even to demons before death. You may be the best older brother there is."

Sakurai stayed up in her bed far into the night, while the other three boys were snoring, fast asleep. Still, she did not have sympathy towards the actions of demons who killed humans. But recognizing their human life before death was the proper way to send them off. Maybe extending kindness as she did to her friends and family in her old life was now a way to keep her sanity—to not feel so disconnected.

Tanjiro? Snoring? Naho, Kiyo, and Sumi banded with Sakurai. Together with the three young girls of the estate, they all whacked him with futon beaters at once, making him correct his total concentration breathing.

As Sakurai slipped into sleep, she suffered no brutal whacking so assumed she had come to re-master it once again, before Tanjirou. Something about her body was beginning to feel new and stronger as her previously casted leg and arms gained the muscle they needed to support her skills.

Zenitsu and Inosuke had given in on function training and had gone on minor jobs on their own to get away, so only Sakurai, Tanjirou, and Nezuko were left. Besides Nezuko, they still got up every morning to train.

But before practice, Sakurai made sure to test her breathing by smashing a gourd to bits.

"Wow! I feel stronger than you, Tanjiro, if only for a day!"

They went to training, and Sakurai caught Kanao by the hem of her shirt, smiling like a lunatic in glee as Kanao looked back in surprise.

Cups did not leave Sakurai with mercy, the rush having her splash the medicinal water in Kanao's face. She had always been fast and flashy after all. After the spout of haste, she realized Kanao must have had to endure that time and time again during her training so apologized quickly. While Tanjiro had a ways to go, Sakurai had no choice anymore but to be sent on missions with her recovery. Bidding goodbye before the other two returned, she headed out on her own with a borrowed Niichiirin blade.

Though, she hoped for Haganezuka to return with her tachi and wakizashi—the Tachi, since she requested Haganezuka Jirou's creation not be left, would be thinner as it had broken in two, but her other blade would be brand new.

If he reacted anything like Jirou, she should keep her wits about her. No matter how gentle he was, his temper was short when it came to hurting his pride-- his own craft. When it came to Sakurai, there was a soft spot Jirou had for her and he'd give in as she warily apologized, but he'd be grumbling over slayer's sword who sent back their blades in pieces. He'd vow to do things like sell their organs and cut their feet, but Sakurai when she'd sincerely apologize he'd fall flat before patting her on the head. One time, he nearly got his words out... stared into her eyes and he was defeated.

On a train back to the estate, she vowed to herself, "I won't break a blade of yours again, Haganezuka-sama." And when she won, she'd run to his embrace on the other side of the bridge.