mark as boyfriend

.............................................................................................................................................................

You cower against the wall as your mom chucks another vase at the wall barely missing your head causing it shatter into a million tiny pieces with a god-awful crash. Screaming and raving at you like a mad woman she slaps you in the face, the blow stinging, your skin feeling raw to the touch. 'You're such a fucking disappointment to this family, it would be better if you just killed yourself,' she spat at you, landing another blow at you making you shrink against the wall even more.

After another long stretch of physical and verbal abuse she glares at you screaming at you to clean up the mess as she stomps up the stairs, leaving you with cane and hand marks all over your body, tears streaming down you face, blurring your vision as you slowly get up to clean the shards of vase which were scattered haphazardly across the floor, the sharp edges nicking at the soles of your feet.

Body still utterly broken, you drag yourself up to bed, not even bothering to look at yourself in the mirror, knowing the girl that would look back at you was nothing but the shell of herself. Throwing yourself on your bed, you pray for peace in the form of dreamless, painless sleep.

Time Skip To Next Morning

Turning your face left and right, you make sure that the thick layer of make-up that you had woken up an hour earlier to apply was perfect, not revealing any signs of the abuse you had received the night before. A ring at your front door, caused you to jump, startled at the slight tinkling sound. Grabbing your bag, you hurried down the stairs where your boyfriend was waiting to walk you to school, holding a steaming two cups of steaming coffee in his hands, his book bag slung on his right shoulder.

'Hey,' he said softly, taking your bag and carrying it for you, handing you your daily dose of caffeine. Grateful, you take a sip but wince when the scalding liquid touches your bruised lip.

'You okay?' he asked, concern furrowing his brow as you struggled to take the first few sips which you normally gulped down at the speed of light.

'I'm fine,' you mutter, unwilling to tell him what happened although both of you had been dating for around a year already. You didn't need to drag him into your problems, he had enough on his plate, with having to attend school and then at night going through the grueling JYP trainee process all the while worried he would be cut out from the programme.

Not entirely convinced with your flimsy excuse he decides not to push you, sure that you would tell him when you were ready.

Time flew by way too fast for your liking and before you knew it the last bell had rung shrilly indicating the end of school, but it was like you were glued in your seat unwilling to move, to go back home where you knew your mother was waiting for you. Your thoughts drifting, (E/C) staring glassily out the window till a hand tapped your shoulder making you start and turn around. Mark was waiting for you, your bag already on his shoulder.

'Hey, you didn't come out and I was worried,' he said softly, as he took your hand.

'I was just... thinking,' you say as you try to pay more attention to him and deflecting anything from yourself.

Both of you walked back in comfortable silence until you reached your neighborhood where he walked you to the door, handing you your bag. 'Hey, are you sure you're okay?' he asked, his hazel eyes seeming to bore into your soul.

Breaking eye contact with him, afraid that if you looked too long everything would come spilling. 'I'm fine,' you mutter, you long glossy (H/C) blocking your face form him. 'I-I'll call you okay?' you stuttered as you unlocked the door.

'Fine,' he sighed resigned, and placed a chaste kiss on the top of your head. 'I love you,' he said simply before walking away, eyes still glued on your figure at the doorstep until you went inside your house.

Closing the door behind you, you could hear footsteps from the stairs as your mom stands hand on her hip and a furious expression on her face. 'Now who was that?' she asked, eyes blazing.

'It was no one,' you say softly not daring to look her in the eyes.' Just a friend from school,' you lie.

'Yeah a friend from school,' she sneered. 'One that helps carry your bag and kisses you before he leaves apparently, you don't think I know what you DO?' she asked her voice steadily growing louder and more shrill. 'Texting in the middle of the night doing God knows what and now I find you're going out with BOYS?' she screamed. 'That's it,' she growled, taking your phone from you and slapping you hard on the face, taking off the concealer and leaving a brand new mark on your left cheek.

'No more contact with this boy and no phone for you,' she screamed, throwing your precious phone to the ground which broke into a million pieces, the screen shattering and all the delicate electronics which kept it working crushed.

'Your no longer allowed to leave the house, you're coming straight back after school, you little slut,' she spat, pulling you long hair and making you look in her eyes. 'Do you understand me?' she screamed.

'Yes,' you whispered barely audible as she let go of you with a glare. 'And don't expect any dinner, I'm too lazy to cook,' she shrieked at you as you ran upstairs where you locked yourself in your room. Crying, it was like your mom had taken the last thing that you were living for. Stuck in this empty, cold, soulless building, Mark was more your home than this shack would ever be. And knowing your mom, you would never be able to see him ever again.

Fueled by fury and utter misery, you set into action the plan that had been brewing in the back of your mind for the past 3 years and finally today seemed to be the right time to do it. Your hands shaking, you had to execute it as carefully as you possibly could late at night to make sure your mom wasn't awake.

Taking a loose piece of paper you scrawled down whatever you felt at the moment, letting your emotions get you through. Your angry scrawl was punctuated by the tears and drops of blood that spotted your paper as you gripped the pencil so hard it seemed to screech and protest in your grasp.

Finally, done, your breathing heavy, your body more consumed by rage than misery now anything, it was like your entire body was flooded with this raging fire, the need to escape to need to just end it.

Stuffing the note into your desk drawer, you knew you would only need it for later. You didn't have much else to do, your plan only required you to execute it at night when no one was around, harder for people to stop you anyway. Slightly lost and confused, you were unsure of what to do, so you rummaged through your desk, finally managing to drag up your old diary from about a year or two before.

Cracking your brain, it took you a couple of tries to remember your password, fiddling with the dial until finally the lock clicked open. Opening the book gently, you could see the scrawl of your handwriting as you detailed down everything that happened to you.

Reading the diary entry, you felt a small smile creeping on your face. Sure, most of your diary entries were all about Mark and how long you had been having a crush on him and whenever he looked at you in the school hallway it was like a million butterflies had burst into flight in your stomach, your mouth going dry and your hands would shake.

Going through all the pages, you blushed and winced at how cringe you sounded especially when it came to describing your feelings to Mark. And then you reached a page which you had inserted a polaroid of both of you together, the day he had finally asked you out, after working up the nerve after a year.

Flashback to one year ago

Your best friend, nudges you in the elbow causing you to nearly spill your drink all over yourself. Wiping your mouth, you glare at her across the small canteen table.

'What was that for?' you asked annoyed as you took several tissues and dabbed your front which was partially soaked.

Motioning to the farthest table on the left where the GOT7 members were sitting your eyes followed her and saw Mark staring right at you but as soon as you had made eye contact, his eyes dropped down to his food as of embarrassed he had been caught.

'He's been staring at you for at LEAST 5 minutes,' (BFF/N) hissed under her breath.

'I'm sure he was just you know, staring off in the distance or something,' you mutter in response. 'Besides I'M usually the one staring at him, if he was looking at me I would know,' you reasoned.

'Maybe you guys have just been staring at each other without either of you knowing,' she replied, a hint of mischief coloring her tone.

Rolling your eyes, you decided to fitfully ignore her by finishing off the rest of your lunch, sipping your drink cola slowly, while you waited for (BFF/N) who was one of the slowest eaters on the planet. Finally, both of you were about to stand up and carry your trays to the back where there was a special compartment for you to sump them. As you both stood up, your head nearly bumped into someone. Your best friend let out a small squeal as THE Mark Tuan was standing, waiting for you in all his perfect glory.

'Hey,' he said softly, his voice reverberating deep in your bones, it was a miracle, you had not dropped your tray yet. 'Can we talk?' he asked.

'Umm, I'm not sure,' you said, glancing at (BFF/N) silently begging her for help.

Instead of getting the damn message, her face broke into a huge grin. 'Of course she can talk to you, I'll just take her tray for her,' she said sweetly while wrenching the tray from your grasp and slipping you a little wink before leaving, her long hair swishing behind her.

Turning back to him, feeling only slightly annoyed by her betrayal, you raised an eyebrow as he remained silent for a few seconds.

'Um can I say it outside?' he asked, hands deep in his pockets.

'Sure,' you shrugged, grabbing your book bag and slinging over your shoulder as you followed him outside to the lockers accompanied by a few curious stares and admittedly glares by some of the girls.

Not going more than a few steps, you finally stopped and faced him. 'So what is it that you want to ask me?'

'Hmmm,' he muttered for a while taking a deep breath, composing himself first. 'Willyougooutwithme?" he asked in a rush, you barely able to decipher his sentence.

'What?' you asked completely confused as his face turned red.

'I'm asking you,' he said slowly. 'Will you go out with me? I mean on a date,' he muttered the last part.

Barely able to believe your ears you were in complete shock, your mind going blank unable to think of anything. Undeterred by your silence he pleaded. 'Just one date please,' he said pitifully.

Laughing at how utterly cute he looked, the butterflies were zooming around in your stomach again as you grinned and said 'Yes,'

It was worth agreeing just to see the look of pure ecstasy and joy that burst on his face. 'So I'll see you after school?' he asked, looking more relaxed now.

'Yeah sure I'll um be at-,' you said before he cut you off.

'At last period chemistry, I know your schedule like the back of my hand (Y/N),' he said before winking and walking back to the canteen.

Back to the Present

After waiting for you after school he had brought you to a super cute cafe which was decorated in twinkling lights and simple decor. There was a place especially for couples to take polaroids and sure enough it was basically ILLEGAL if both of you had not taken one. Then, he over a cup of iced latte, he had confessed how he had fallen for you at first sight when he came into the school. Finally, at the end of his long speech he had asked you to be his girlfriend and of course you agreed immediately.

Taking out the small polaroid, it was one of the few treasured possessions your mom had never been able to destroy. Closing your book with a sigh, you realized the clock had already reached about 10 and the sky had turned pitch black.

Clutching the picture desperately, you went up to your desk and took out the piece of paper you had written for your mom and the separate one you had written for the most important person in your life.

Running a shaky hand through your hair, you wondered for the last time whether you were really going to go through with this. Making up your mind, you lifted the secret compartment you had been stashing all your pills in, the orange bottle flashing menacingly in the light. Filling a bath tub full of water, you stepped in, the warm gentle water lapping against your leg and body as you submerged yourself in it. Pouring out the multi-coloured pills which gleamed against your palm, you swallowed them all in one go, dry.

Immediately a heavy sleepiness enveloped you. Sinking back into the water you allowed to flow over you, the picture of you and Mark still clutched in your fist, glad that at least you had some piece of him as you left.

Mark's POV

Pacing back and forth, he runs another hand through his hair for what seems like the millionth time. It had been 3 whole hours and (Y/N) still hadn't called him like she had promised. There was a strange glint of sadness in her eyes when he had left her just this afternoon. It was brief and in the blink of an eye it was gone, but there nonetheless.

Glancing at the clock hung on the wall, each second that passed by increasing his anxiety by tenfold. Finally deciding to take matters into his own hands, he grabbed his phone from the table and called you, praying for you to pick up, but the only voice he was greeted with was the monotone dial tone, asking him to leave a message.

Growling, the feeling of uneasiness growing, he called the second best person, your best friend (BFF/N) who picked up almost immediately.

'Hello?' a tired, strained voice asked.

'(BFF/N)?' Mark asked, clutching at the phone like to was a lifeline. 'Have you heard from (Y/N)? She promised to call me but it's been a couple hours and she hasn't picked up any of my calls, all of it just goes straight to voicemail,' his worry causing him to panic slightly.

'I'm looking for her too,' (BFF/N)'s voice replied, worry tinged her voice. 'To be honest I don't know if she's told you yet, I mean I'm not sure if I should tell you if she hasn't even told you in the first place, it's not my secret to tell and,' she babbled on and on, Mark getting more irritated.

'Please just get to the point,' he said wearily.

'Well, you see... (Y/N) has had some um... suicidal tendencies before,' she said the last part so softly, Mark had to strain to hear what she was saying.

'What?' he shouted on the other side of the phone as he heard the words.

You heard her hesitate on the other side of the phone. 'I mean she actually did try once about 3 years ago? I came in time to stop her. It's all her mother really, she has to go through a lot of physical abuse, and she went through depression for a while, of course that was until you asked her out. I've never seen her so happy after you proposed to her, I was sort of hoping it had gone away but if she's quiet for more than a few hours I get worried again.' she said in all in one breath, making him realise exactly how dire the situation was.

'I'm going over now,' he said putting his phone on speaker and putting on the table as he hastily got dressed in a white T-shirt and sweatpants.

'W-What?' she shrieked, her voice exploding through the entire room. 'You are NOT going without me Mark Tuan,' she nearly screamed over the phone, Mark silently thanking himself for putting her on speaker. 'If you haven't noticed, (Y/N) is my best friend too so you better stay put till I get there,' she threatened before putting down the phone with a click.

Almost 2 minutes after she had put down the phone, he heard a ring on the doorbell. Shocked he sprinted downstairs and flung the door open to find (BFF/N) waiting impatiently.

'Took you long enough,' she muttered as both of you nearly sprinted to (Y/N)'s house.

'And how exactly did you manage to get to my house so fast?' he asked incredulously.

'(Y/N) and I have stalked you once or twice and we sort of figured a shortcut to your house from both of ours,' she said nonchalantly as if it was completely normal.

The sheer shock of the words would have caused Mark to stop in his footsteps but nothing else could surprise him anymore. Finally arriving at your house huffing and panting, both of them noticed that the usual black car which had always been parked in the driveway was gone.

'Oh shit,' (BFF/N) swore under her breath as her eyes flicked to the 2nd floor where she knew her best friend probably was.

'What?' Mark asked, worried as she marched straight up to the front door and wrenched it open.

'Rule number 1: (Y/N) always tries to do things especially ridiculous things when her mom is gone,' she explained as both of you climbed up the stairs. 'And,' she panted as she reached the locked door, which both of them managed to open bodily. 'She NEVER EVER leaves her bathroom light on at this hour,' she muttered as she ran to said bathroom where both of you could her the water running.

A scream pierced the night air as the short-brown haired girl and the boy find the body of a young teenage girl lying in the bathtub, body fully submerged, a strew of pills on the floor.

Shakily, the girl calls 911 as the boy carries out the body attempting to revive her. Both of them are in shock as they see your lifeless body carried away and speeded to the hospital.

Your POV

The last thing you could remember was taking the pills, then everything went black. You could remember thinking: 'It's done, it's finally over,'

Suddenly, your world was washed in bright light making you wince, wondering what had happened. Was this how the end was supposed to feel like? But you could hear the steady beep of a heart machine. Lifting your eyelids, blinking at the bright light, you were staring up at a blank white wall, LED lights shining brightly down on you.

'Well, if this is heaven I don't approve much of it,' your hoarse voice cracked.

'Well, if you're awake it's heaven for ME at least,' a deep voice said beside you, one which you recognized easily.

Struggling to turn to your left, you were hindered by so many IV lines and tubes which hooked you up to machines, keeping you alive.

'Well, I didn't know you would be in heaven?' you said almost incredulously facing his worn face.

'Haha very funny,' he retorted. 'You're not even IN heaven, you're in the hospital,' he said tiredly, rubbing his eyes.

'WHAT?' you nearly screamed. 'B-But the pills and the water and and,' you sputtered, trying to make sense of the world.

'Oh God speaking of that,' he groaned. 'NEVER EVER DO THAT (Y/N). Do you know how worried both (BFF/N) and I were?' he sighed, head in his hands. 'We were nearly too late,' he whispered to the floor. 'Just another 5 minutes and the paramedics said you would have-,' he choked off unable to continue. 'Why in the entire world did you do that?' he almost growled at you.

'I don't know,' you murmured. 'It's been in my mind for a while about 2 years ago, then you came into the picture and