Padmé's POV
"(y/n)!" I screamed as I reached over the railing and held onto her ankle. I was halfway over the railing and I was struggling. If I was one second later I wouldn't have caught her in time.

Satine was right next to me and she helped me pull myself back over the railing while gripping (y/n)'s other ankle. We both pulled with all the strength we had to pull her back over. As soon as her torso came into view I gripped onto her clothing and pulled even harder causing her to come forward and I pulled her into a hug when she was finally safe. Satine was standing to the side of us, out of breathe.

She was crying uncontrollably into my shoulder. It was worse than her first night here like she was letting out all the pain she had been holding in, "I'm so sorry." She continued to cry and I hugged her tightly, I could smell the alcohol on her and I made it a point to put the wine somewhere where she wouldn't find it.

She just tried to kill herself, I didn't think it would come to this. How can he expect me to keep it a secret when it was putting her life in danger? I wanted to tell her, I know I should but if I did decide to tell her, it definitely wouldn't be right now while she's severely intoxicated. "Don't apologize it's okay." I rubbed her back gently.

"I think I'm gonna be sick." She choked out as she pulled away from me and just as she said, she turned her head to the side and started to throw up the wine. Both Satine and I moved out of the way and I held her hair out of her face as she bent over and released the contents of her stomach onto the balcony floor.

"I'll wake up 3PO to clean this." Satine went into the kitchen where my droid slept.

She finally stopped throwing up and I helped her stand to take her to the shower. "Come on, you need to get cleaned up and I'll give you a new pair of pajamas." She didn't argue with me and let me lead her into my bathroom where I undressed her and put her in the shower.

She didn't stand, instead she immediately sat on the floor and let the water run down her. I wanted to give her privacy but after what just happened. I couldn't, I didn't trust her with herself anymore. Satine walked in and she took the vomit covered clothes and brought in a new pair, "Thank you," I told her and she nodded. She looked to (y/n) who was staring dead at a wall, emotionless.

"I'll be in the living room, I think it's best I sleep
there for night, just in case." She half-smiled before walking off to the living room. It was smart, that way if (y/n) sneaks out there again Satine will be there to watch over her.

"Hey I'm sure you're clean now, do you want to get out?" I bent down next to her, she hardly moved but the water had cleaned all the extra vomit off of her face and she didn't reek of alcohol anymore.

Her eyes slowly found mine and she nodded. I sighed, I hope she wasn't going back to her silent state. That would be a step backwards.

I grabbed the towel and wrapped it around her and helped her stand to her feet. I took her to my room with the pajamas in hand. I was about to help her put them on when she stopped me, "I can do it." She grabbed the clothes from me and went to the corner where she dressed herself.

She crawled onto the bed and got under the covers without saying anything else. I got in next to her and I knew I wasn't gonna get any sleep tonight. I was too afraid now. So I laid there and stared up at the ceiling wondering what the hell I was gonna do.

(y/n)'s POV
Throwing up took away the nauseating feeling but everything was still spinning. I laid on my side and stared at the wall and I had my eyes stay fixated on the designs. Focusing on one thing helped my head to no longer feel like it was spinning.

I hate you for leaving me behind. I knew I should have stayed on that ship with him. I knew we never should have split up. I knew it was a trap. I hated him for making me live in a galaxy without him.

After a few minutes of letting my thoughts run uncontrollably I felt the sleepiness that came with alcohol and I allowed my eyes to close slowly so I could drift into sleep.

I'm sorry. I heard his voice. I knew it wasn't really him. I was used to hearing his voice in my dreams but I cherished it anyway.

Anakin's POV
I hate you for leaving me behind.

My eyes shot open and I sat up from the bed I was in. I heard her voice. It was the most beautiful sound in the galaxy. I hadn't heard it in weeks and it felt so good to hear it that I almost cried.

But then my mind started to register the words.

She said she hated me. It hurt to hear but I couldnt blame her for the grief she was feeling right now.

I'm sorry. I told her and I knew I shouldn't have. I risked her knowing I was alive. But a part of me didn't care, I wanted her to know how sorry I am for doing this to her.

(y/n)'s POV
"It's worse than I thought it would be and we really could have used you." I woke up to the sound of Padmé's voice coming from the living. She sounded upset with whoever she was speaking to.

"I'm sorry Padme but I couldn't be here, I couldn't look her in the eyes." The other voice spoke and I recognized it. It was someone I've been wanting to see but for some reason they haven't been around.

I immediately stood up and walked out of the room to see Padme, Satine, and "Ahsoka." I spoke her name and she turned around when she heard my voice.

"(y/n) how are you?" She asked as she walked towards me. A part of me was angry for her for not being around when I needed her. I was told she was on missions but I'm not so sure about that and she wasn't even at the funeral.

"I've been better." I mumbled with my arms crossed I still had that aching feeling in my chest but I was starting to get used to it, "Where have you been?"

She looked down to the floor and was silent for a moment, "I'm sorry I haven't been around, I didn't handle the news very well and threw myself into work. I needed to keep myself distracted." She confessed looking back into my eyes.

I wanted to stay mad but I did my best to remember that even though I lost a husband and a mentor, she lost her master, someone she saw as a brother. And Obi-Wan who she was also close with. "Well I'm glad you're here now." I pulled her into a hug and she hugged me tightly back.

We both walked over and sat on the couch with the other two. "How are you feeling this morning (y/n)?" Satine asked as she passed me a cup of coffee.

"Regretful." I admitted as I grabbed the coffee from her. I remembered my drunken state. I remembered almost killing myself and them saving me. I felt like shit for putting them through that. Which is why today I decided I wasn't going to wallow in my sadness. I was going to try and get out and do something.  "I'm so sorry again, I was out of my mind." I sighed sadly.

"You're grieving, you have nothing to apologize for, but let's keep off the wine and I'm locking the balcony doors at night." She shrugged as she took a sip of her coffee.

I was lucky to have these girls in front of me. I lost so much but I still had this and I couldn't lose sight of that. I needed to try and accept that he was gone. It was so hard and the thought of forgetting him and moving forward was enough to make me want to have another breakdown but I held it in.

Padmé's doorbell rang and she sighed, "If it's that damn Mace again I'm going throw HIM off the balcony." She stood up and walked towards the door and I allowed myself to smile at her comment, I feel like that was my first time smiling in weeks."Chancellor Palpatine, what brings you here?" I perked my head up at the sound of the chancellors name. I heard a muffled sound, most likely him speaking but I couldn't make it out. "Hold on."

She walked back in an looked directly at me, "He wants to talk to you, is that okay?"

I nodded as I stood up, "Yeah that's okay." I walked to the door and the chancellor was standing at the doorway.

He smiled when he saw me, "Hello dear, I would have come to see how you were sooner but I figured I would give you time. I hope I'm not intruding."

I shook my head, "Of course not Chancellor, it's a pleasure to see you." I half-smiled back to him.

"Walk with me? I have some news, that believe you would be interested in." He held his arm out for me to take and I accepted it, closing the door to Padmé's apartment behind me.

We walked down the hallway of the Senate building side by side, "So what is this news?" I questioned with curiosity.

"Well I have some sources who have told me the current location of General Grievous." He began and my head snapped to the side so I could look at him, my blood boiling at the name of the one who took my world from me, "Anakin was special to me, like a son even. I want revenge for what happened to him and Im sure you do too... since you were his wife." His eyes slowly looked to me when he said that last part.

My eyes widened in surprise , "How-"

"Anakin told me of course," He cut me off and stopped walking so we were standing in the hallway facing each other, "He trusted me, so you know you can trust me." Anakin never told me that he told the Chancellor of our marriage. I feel like that's something he would have mentioned. But then again, how could he possibly know if not told by Anakin. I also knew he had a good relationship with the Chancellor so it wasn't hard to believe.

"Where is General Grievous?" I asked anxiously, I needed to find him. I was going to end him once and for all. I hated him for what he did. I knew I shouldn't be feeling all this anger and all this hate. But I couldn't help it, I lost my husband because of this disgusting being.

He smiled, "Ryloth."

Then that's where I'll be going, "Thank you Chancellor." I felt bad ending the conversation here but now that I knew where he was I needed to go now. I couldn't risk wasting time and have Grievous move somewhere else.

"Of course (y/n) and please do be careful, you're the only piece of Anakin I have left. I'd hate to lose you too." He placed a hand on my arm and squeezed it with a smile.

"I'll be fine. I'll come see you once Ive returned." I assured him and took off back to Padmé's apartment.

I burst through the door and they all looked to me confused, "I have to go somewhere." I wasn't going to tell them where I was going or what I was doing. I knew they wouldn't approve.

"No you're not you can't be alone right now." Padme tried to argue with me. I didn't blame her, just last night a was a suicidal mess. But today I had an opportunity for revenge.

"It's  something I need to do. Please trust me." I pleaded to her and the other two were looking between her and I waiting for her to speak.

"You'll be back by tonight?" She sighed in defeat.

"Yeah or tomorrow morning, one or the other." I shrugged as I walked to her room to put on a change of clothes. I was in day clothes that she leant me and I needed to be in something more agile.

I could hear her coming into the room behind and she watched my clip my weapons to my belt, "There's something you should know first." She spoke but I hardly listened I had my mind focused on one thing, Grievous. It's because of him that I had this hole inside of me.

"It'll have to wait I'm sorry." I rushed out of the room and left her apartment without another word.

Padmé's POV
I wonder what the Chancellor told her that made her leave so abruptly. Just last night I saved her from herself and now she was rushing off like she had a mission. I was worried that in her grieving mind that she wasn't make the right decisions. Which is exactly what Anakin wanted me to stop from happening.

(a/n Please let me know your thoughts, vote and comment! I love you all ♥️)