𝗂𝗌𝗅𝖺 𝗉𝗈𝗏

𝗂𝗌𝗅𝖺'𝗌 𝗁𝗈𝗍𝖾𝗅 𝗋𝗈𝗈𝗆

october 6, 2024

9:50 am

as i kept replaying the memory in my mind, unable to shake it off, my phone suddenly buzzed, pulling me back to the present. i reached for it, glancing at the screen—tucker.

"hey," he said, his voice familiar, comforting.

"hey," i replied, a smile tugging at my lips.

"i was wondering if you'd like to grab a coffee?" he asked.

"yes!" i answered, maybe a little too eagerly.

he chuckled. "great. whenever you're ready, just come to the living room. i'm already here."

i rolled my eyes, laughing. "you idiot, you could've just come to my room."

"that's what i told him," ky chimed in, suddenly joining the conversation.

i shook my head, laughing again. of course, ky was with him.

"alright, i'll be out in a second," i said before hanging up, my heart feeling lighter than it had just moments ago.

i tossed my phone onto the bed and got up, stretching for a moment before heading to my closet. my fingers skimmed over the hangers until i grabbed a simple white baby tee and my favorite pair of jeans—comfortable but flattering. i slipped them on quickly, not wanting to keep tucker waiting, then reached for my red spezial sneakers. they were a little worn out, but i loved them that way.

after tying my laces, i gave myself a quick once-over in the mirror. my hair was slightly messy, but i didn't mind. tucker had seen me in worse states. grabbing my phone, i took a deep breath before stepping out of my room, already feeling a little more awake.

as i walked out of my room, i could already hear their voices from the living room. tucker's laughter mixed with ky's playful teasing, an easy, familiar sound that made my chest feel warm.

"finally," ky said dramatically when he saw me, leaning back against the couch with a smirk. "we were starting to think you fell asleep again."

"oh, shut up," i said, rolling my eyes as i walked over to them.

tucker stood up, his eyes flickering over me for a second before he grinned. "ready?"

"yeah, let's go," i said, already heading for the door.

"hey, what about me?" ky called out.

i turned back with a smirk. "you're not invited."

he put a hand to his chest like i'd just wounded him. "wow. betrayal."

tucker laughed, shaking his head. "you can survive without us for an hour."

ky sighed dramatically but waved us off. "fine, go. but if you don't bring me back something, i'm disowning both of you."

i laughed, bumping my shoulder into tucker's as we stepped outside. the air was crisp, the kind of morning that made a hot coffee sound even better. as we walked, i glanced at him, suddenly feeling grateful for moments like this—easy, simple, and just ours.

as we stepped outside, the crisp morning air wrapped around us, waking me up a little more. we walked side by side, our steps falling into an easy rhythm, and for a moment, everything just felt... light.

it wasn't until i glanced down at my outfit that i noticed it—white baby tee, jeans, red spezial sneakers. then i looked over at tucker. white tee, jeans, and his own pair of red sneakers.

i stopped mid-step, turning to him with a smirk. "are we seriously matching right now?"

tucker looked down at himself, then at me, before grinning. "damn. guess we are."

"this is so embarrassing," i said dramatically, even though a small part of me found it kind of cute.

"nah," he said, bumping his shoulder into mine. "it just proves we've got that 'effortlessly cool couple' thing going on."

i rolled my eyes, but i couldn't fight the smile tugging at my lips. "whatever you say, tucker."

he laughed, his hand brushing against mine as we walked. and just like that, the morning felt a little warmer.

we kept walking, the crisp morning air mixing with the warmth of the sun peeking through the buildings. the streets weren't too busy yet, just a few people passing by, lost in their own worlds. but mine felt focused on one thing—tucker.

i felt it before i saw it. the way his hand kept brushing against mine, barely there, but enough to make me notice. at first, i thought it was just by chance, but then it happened again. and again.

i glanced at him from the corner of my eye. his gaze was forward, casual, like he wasn't doing anything at all. but his fingers twitched slightly, hesitant, like he was trying to decide whether or not to just go for it.

so i made the decision for him.

i let my hand relax, fingers slightly open, making it easy for him. he took the invitation almost immediately, his pinky hooking onto mine before his hand fully intertwined with mine. his palm was warm, his grip firm but easy, like he'd been waiting for this.

i bit my lip to hide my smile, looking down at our hands for a second before glancing up at him. "so, was this your plan all along?"

he finally turned to me, a teasing grin playing on his lips. "maybe."

i shook my head, laughing softly. "so smooth, tucker."

"hey, it worked, didn't it?" he said, giving my hand a light squeeze.

i didn't answer, just let my thumb brush against his as we kept walking. the café was only a block away, but suddenly, i wished the walk was longer.

we reached the café, the scent of fresh coffee and pastries drifting out as tucker pulled the door open for me. i stepped inside, the warmth immediately sinking into my skin, making me realize just how cold my fingers had gotten despite the comfort of tucker's hand.

"find us a seat, i'll order," he said, finally letting go.

i hesitated for a second, my hand feeling weirdly empty now, but i nodded. "okay, just don't mess up my order."

he rolled his eyes. "please, i could order for you in my sleep."

i smirked but didn't argue, making my way to a small table by the window. shrugging off my jacket, i sat down, watching as tucker stood in line, his hands in his pockets, rocking back slightly on his heels. he glanced over his shoulder at me once, and when our eyes met, he sent me a small smile—just enough to make my stomach do something stupid.

i sighed, leaning back in my seat. it was unfair how easy this felt with him, how effortless.

a few minutes later, he walked over with two cups in hand, sliding one toward me as he sat down. "for you," he said, setting down his own drink.

"thanks." i wrapped my hands around the cup, letting the warmth seep into my fingers.

he took a sip of his coffee before leaning forward slightly, elbows resting on the table. "so, what's up? you seem... i don't know. in your head."

i blinked at him. "i do?"

he gave me a look. "yeah. what's going on in that overthinking brain of yours?"

i exhaled a small laugh, shaking my head. "just... stuff."

"stuff," he repeated, amused. "deep, emotional stuff or stupid, meaningless stuff?"

"both," i admitted, taking a sip of my coffee.

he grinned like he already knew the answer. "lucky for you, i'm great at listening to both."

i smiled, twirling the cup in my hands. "good. because i think you just signed up for a long conversation."

he smirked, leaning back in his chair. "i figured. lucky for you, i don't mind."

as we settled into our conversation, the air between us felt different—comfortable, but charged with an unspoken understanding. it wasn't like we were a couple. not yet, at least. but there was something undeniably there between us.

tucker leaned back in his chair, his eyes flickering between my face and his coffee cup. "you know, if someone had told me last week that i'd be sitting here with you, talking about us like this..." he trailed off, a little grin playing on his lips.

i raised an eyebrow, not quite sure where he was going with this. "what do you mean, 'like this'?"

"like... whatever this is," he said, gesturing vaguely between us. "we're not a couple, obviously, but..."

"but?" i prompted, suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious.

"but we're definitely not just friends either, right?" he said, his voice low and casual, like he was just trying to figure it out himself.

i shifted in my seat, taking a moment before responding. "i don't know. it's weird. i feel like we're somewhere between everything and nothing at the same time."

he nodded, his gaze softening. "yeah. i get that. it's like... we're not together, but we're not just friends anymore either."

i let out a small laugh, shaking my head. "that's a terrible way to describe it."

he grinned. "well, i'm not the best with words, you know that by now."

"true," i agreed, smirking. "but i get what you mean. it's like, we kissed last night, and now i can't stop thinking about it. but it's not like we've talked about what it means. it's just... hanging there."

he leaned forward, eyes locked on mine. "yeah. and i'm kind of okay with that. but also... kinda not. because i don't want to be stuck in this weird in-between place forever."

i felt my chest tighten slightly, the vulnerability in his words hitting me harder than i expected. "me neither."

"so, what do we do about it?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

i swallowed, unsure of how to answer. it was all so messy, too much in the air to really make sense of. but in that moment, i wanted to say something—anything—that would make it feel a little less confusing.

"i don't know," i admitted, a small smile tugging at my lips. "but i think it's better than not knowing at all."

tucker's grin spread, and there was something in his eyes—relief, maybe, or maybe it was hope. "yeah, i think you're right."

he reached across the table, brushing his fingers against mine again. it wasn't a question this time, just a quiet confirmation that we were both in this—whatever this was.

"so, we're just... figuring it out?" i asked softly, not really expecting an answer.

"yeah," he said with a shrug. "no rush. we've got time."

i nodded, my heart thumping in my chest, but this time, it didn't feel like an unknown. it felt like a promise.

as we finished our drinks, the last sip of coffee warming me from the inside, tucker stood up, stretching his arms above his head. "ready to head out?" he asked, his voice casual but with a hint of excitement, like he knew we had plans for the rest of the day.

"yeah," i said, standing up and grabbing my jacket. "let's go."

we walked toward the door, and just as we were about to step outside, a voice called out from behind us.

"hey, excuse me, are you role model?"

tucker turned around, a polite smile instantly on his face. "yeah, that's me."

the girl, probably in her late teens, hesitated for a second, her eyes widening as she looked at him. "oh my god, i love your music! can i take a picture with you?"

tucker grinned, always good-natured about stuff like this. "of course," he said, stepping closer to her.

she pulled out her phone, ready to snap the photo, but then her eyes shifted to me, and her smile grew even wider. "wait—are you isla?" she asked, her voice suddenly filled with excitement.

i blinked, caught off guard for a second. "uh, yeah. that's me."

the girl's face lit up, and she turned to tucker with a look of disbelief. "oh my god, i love you both! can we take a picture together?"

tucker's grin widened as he looked at me, a playful glint in his eyes. "guess we're a package deal now."

i laughed, stepping closer. "guess so," i said, still a little surprised by the sudden attention.

the girl took a few quick photos of us, her hands shaking slightly as she tried to capture the moment. "thank you so much!" she gushed. "you guys are honestly the best."

"no problem," tucker said with a wink, then turned to me. "looks like we just made someone's day."

"yeah, looks like it," i agreed, the whole thing feeling surreal but fun.

after the photo was done, the girl gave us one last excited wave and ran off, her phone held close to her chest like she couldn't believe what just happened.

"well, that was... unexpected," i said, smiling as we stepped back into the cool air outside.

"yeah, but it's kind of cool, don't you think?" tucker said, looking at me with that same grin. "we're a team now. whether we like it or not."

i smirked, raising an eyebrow. "a team, huh? i'm still not sure about that one."

he laughed, nudging me with his elbow. "you'll get used to it."

as we continued walking, the weird, sweet moment still lingering between us, i couldn't help but feel like things were slowly starting to click. we might not have a clear label for what we were, but for now, that was okay. we were figuring it out. together.

as we approached the hotel, it suddenly hit me, and i couldn't help but laugh at myself. "we forgot ky's coffee," i said, shaking my head.

tucker's face fell for a second, but then he started laughing too. "fuck, you're right. i totally spaced. being with you, i just get distracted."

i raised an eyebrow, pretending to be surprised. "distracted by me? really?"

he looked over at me, his grin a little sheepish but still warm. "yeah, you help me forget everything going on in my head. it's nice," he said, stepping closer as if he couldn't help himself.

the weight of his words hit me, the warmth of them settling into my chest. i hadn't expected that kind of honesty. "i do, huh?" i said, my voice a little softer now, closer to a whisper.

he nodded, his gaze never leaving mine. "yeah. it's like... when i'm with you, nothing else matters. like i'm not thinking about anything else."

i felt my heart race a little, but instead of saying something, i just took another step closer, closer enough that i could feel his breath on my skin. "and this?" i asked, my voice barely audible as i tilted my face toward his. "can this distract you?"

i didn't wait for an answer before i leaned in, my lips brushing softly against his. the kiss was light at first, just a gentle touch, but there was something about it that made my chest tighten in a way i hadn't expected. the world around us seemed to disappear, and it was just him and me, standing in the quiet between our shared breath.

when we finally pulled away, his forehead rested against mine, his voice thick with emotion. "yeah, it distracts me. a lot," he murmured before his lips found mine again, this time with more urgency, more need. i could feel everything—his hands lightly gripping my shoulders, my heart pounding, my whole body alive with every brush of his lips against mine.

it wasn't just a kiss anymore. it was everything—an answer to all the unspoken things hanging between us, an unspoken agreement that this was something worth exploring, worth holding onto. and for once, i didn't feel like i had to rush to figure it out. for now, i was just here, with him. and that was enough.

🦭

𝗁𝖾𝗒 𝖻𝗋𝗈𝗌𝗄𝗂𝗌, filler?? i don't know but we got another kiss so YAY

i went to renaissance fair yesterday with some friends (my friends = people in the same club i go lol) and it was so funn. i got henna and me and my other friend (who's also in the club) saw some cats and rats do tricks, it was so cute. but it was so hot and so windy, i almost fainted bru. ALSO NOT ME RANTING IN HERE but there's a dude i kinda have a crush from my club and he said he was going to the thingy but at the end he dipped like he didn't even go. like the universe is my number one opp. this is the second time we have an event/hangout and he doesn't go. does broski hates me? like i don't even talk to him bc i'm really bad at making conversation lol.

anyway here's a pic of the henna:

if you have any ideas, suggestions, or just things you'd love to see, drop them in the comments, bbgs!

sub, like and comment!!

enjoy!