Three days came and went unnoticed, and before we knew it, it was the night before our first live show. We went on rehearsals all week, constantly working on our vocals and our stage presence, and I must say, we were good. Now that I was more comfortable with the boys, it was easier for me to loosen up and give everything I've got, partially not wanting to let them down. Our first live show meant that we could either kill it, or that we can mess up so bad that we could go straight home, and we definitely preferred to work our asses off but kill it.

We were in Louis and Harry's room, all of us splattered around the room, me laying on the bed with Niall next to me, Harry and Zayn laying on the floor and Louis and Liam sitting with their backs pressed against the wall, talking about everything our mind could come up with, except tommorow. We were trying to suppress our nerves, and distract ourselves from the knowledge that the upcoming day was going to be one of our most important ones on the show, and it worked for one hour or two, but after all of us were at the verge of bursting out with nerves, we decided to drop the act and give comfort to each other.

"We're going to kill it, guys, we just have to be calm." I said, talking to them, but trying to convince myself. Like usual, me and Niall were the most anxious, or at least we showed it the most. Louis was trying to hide it with making more jokes than usual, Harry was acting like his goofy and confident self but slightly more suspicious, Zayn was more quiet than usual, but didn't show his nerves, and Liam was the most collected out of all of us, but I could still sense that he was nervous.

"Yeah, we worked really hard this week, there is no way we can mess it up." Liam said, but Niall quickly responded.

"Don't say a big word, mate, I'm nervous as heck and the "aaahh" I'm supposed to do all throughout the song will come out more as screeching than singing, believe me." He said, and we all laughed, except him, clearly not joking. Our laughter died after a few seconds, and silence came over us, but I quickly started rambling again, not wanting to be in my thoughts for too long.

"How far do you think we'll go in the show?" The boys were silent for a moment, thinking what should they respond. I personally thought that we had potential for the final, but in the history of the U.K. X Factor a group had never been on a final, so what was left for us? We were kids, well, except for Louis, who was 18, but the rest of us were 15, 16, and 17. We were inexperienced, young, not that mature, and going to the final would have been a miracle, no matter if we were talented or not.

"Um... I think we can reach the finals, I really do." Harry said while nodding his head. He was always positive and a dreamer, so in his mind the possibilities were always in the front. Harry never said anything along the lines of "we can't do this" or "we're never going to do it", so I really appreciated that there was a person in our X Factor experience who could always push us forward when we are feeling down and unable to continue fighting.

"I think so, too." Louis said and smiled a little. He was also very possitive, really similar to Harry, but he was not that santimental like him. Louis was more on the careless side, not giving everything that much of a thought, while Harry was a very deep person, who, even at 16, was very reasonable of everything.

"I think that we can win if we work hard enough." Niall said. He was more of a possitive dreamer without thinking on the realistic side. I found it really cute, he was always the one with the goals set high, even when we watched our auditions together when they aired them the previous day, I noticed that Niall said something along the lines of "I want to sell arenas, make albums and work with some of the best artists in the world" and it was really nice that he had dreams this big.

"Even if we don't reach the finals, I don't think we will leave in the early stages." Zayn said, and I nodded. We were both on the more realistic side, not wanting to set our goals too high and be sad and dissapointed if something goes wrong. Of course, we were positive about everything, but we were prepared for the bad, too.

"I think so, too. I want us to reach the finals, and I know that we will give everything we've got, but even if we don't I will still be super proud of us." Liam responded. He was our rock, really. He was my older brother that I could reach out to every time I felt like I couldn't do it, and he was also the one who experienced X Factor two times, and he knew exactly what it felt like to go home before you even had the chance to prove yourself, and me and the rest of the boys had respect for Liam and his strong will to come back after two years.

"We can do it, guys, no matter how hard it's going to be." I said and the boys all muttered "yeah" or "of course". We continued talking, some things about tommorow, and rest of it was all jokes and small talk, and before I knew it my eyes started to get droopy. I was just dozing off when I heard Louis talking.

"Cara, I know that you're sleepy, but I don't want to sleep on the floor, love." I groaned, and rolled on my stomach lifelessly. I hated when someone interrupted my sleep. That was one of my biggest pet peeves, and since I met the boys, I haven't slept normal like before. Some were breaking stuff, others were waking me up because I have to go somewhere, and then there were people who woke me up from my peaceful afternoon sleep that I pretty much deserved after numerous interrupts the previous days, just because they didn't know where the packs with jelly worms were (I won't say names, but they start with N and H).

"Can't you go sleep in my room, love?" I asked in a sleepy voice, mocking his favorite word to call everyone. I heard him sighing, muttering something to Harry, who preffered to not say anything to me while sleeping, because he has faced my moody self after ruined sleep, and he saw that the situation was not beautiful. Louis probably didn't care, so he was the one who decided to shoo me back to my room. Well, they had to either sleep in my room, or carry me back, I won't let them ruin my sleep for the hundredth time this week.

As I supposed, I felt my body getting pulled up firstly from my back and arms by one of the two boys, and then my legs by the other one. I opened one of my eyes to see that Harry held my legs, and he was telling Louis where to step so he won't fall on his butt. I actually didn't mind to get up and walk to my bedroom myself, but I decided to get them back for all these times they interrupted my sleep for the most stupid and annoying reasons. I heard a door getting kicked open, and the next thing I felt was my back against the mattress of my bed. I was already showered and in my pajamas, so I didn't have to worry about that. I opened my eyes and stretched, smiling sweetly at the boys, barely opening my eyes.

"Thank you, boys, for giving me the reward I deserve after you woke me up at least 10 times this week for the most dumb reasons. Now I wish you good night..." By the end of my heart wrenching speech for me, I was speaking in almost unintelligible from sleepiness voice, and after a few seconds all I saw was darkness.

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The next morning I got woken up by Zayn and Niall shaking me quickly, whisper yelling some words I couldn't fully absorb because of the sudden stop of relaxation.

"Cara, Cara, Cara, Cara-" Niall was quickly rambling while Zayn was shaking me quickly. I groaned and didn't open my eyes just yet, not wanting to get up.

"C'mon, wake up, we have to make breakfast!" Zayn said and after his sentence I opened one eye.

"Did you really have to wake me up because of a breakfast you can make without me?" I said angry and sleepy at the same time, slowly pulling the soft, loving blanket away from me. I got up and shooed Zayn and Niall away from my bed, getting angry right at my rise. Why did they always have to wake me up like this? Didn't they know how to make breakfast, didn't they know how to swipe away the mess they made, didn't they know how to search for something more than a few seconds instead of waking me up to find it in the most harsh way?! I really felt like their mother, I was constantly running after them to clean, or cook, or scold them for the dumb shit they did, and it seemed like they were forgetting that I was a kid, too, and being the only girl didn't mean that I had to run after them and pretend that I enjoyed cooking and cleaning. I wanted to have fun too, but it seemed like I wasn't going to, at least for now, because someone had to keep an eye on the chaos along with Liam.

"Well, me and Louis tried to make scrambled eggs already, but-" Niall began to say, and I instantly brought my hand up, stopping him before he continued with a sentence I preffered not to hear.

"I don't want to hear it, if it was you and Louis then it's already done and irreparable." I sighed and brushed my hair. I quickly made my way down to the kitchen, Zayn and Niall following behind me. It smelled like a mix of something burnt and bacon, and when I walked in the kitchen I saw Liam cooking bacon on the pan, and in a pan next to him was a pile of burnt scrambled eggs, that I knew were a creation from Niall and Louis. When Liam saw that I was at the doorway he gave me a hopeless look, signaling that he was done with everyone's shit. I shook my head and walked over to help him, opening the fridge to see that the burnt eggs were our last. I took a deep breath, trying to stay calm, and opened one of the kabinets and pulled out the bread, along with the peanut butter and raspberry jam, making up what we're going to eat while moving.

Then after bringing the plates down I started spreading peanut butter and jam on the bread, putting them all on the plates and Liam put the bacon there too, Zayn decided to join us and poured apple juice in six glasses, and called out for Niall and Louis to help bring the plates and glasses to the table, while me and Liam stayed in the kitchen to clean the mess Niall and Louis created.

"Why do Niall and Louis always have to do something stupid, I'm starting to think that they just like to make me angry!" I said frustrated, while throwing away the burnt eggs in the trash can. Liam laughed a little.

"They just like to have fun and make a mess like little kids." He said and I nodded. It was partially that, yeah, but I was sure the other part was because they liked to see me angry, probably because I looked ridiculous when I was mad. When we were done cleaning up, we sat on the table to eat, and I noticed that Harry was missing.

"Where's Harry?" I asked while looking around the first floor.

"He's taking a shower." Louis said while biting on his sandwich. Then there was a sound of stairs cracking and when we looked up we saw Harry walking down the stairs with wet hair. He sat on the empty chair next to Louis, after muttering a "good morning, band", and bit on his bacon, seeming a little nervous for today. In all the distraction since waking up I almost forgot about how our first live performance was literally tonight. I quickly started to tense up, tapping my foot quickly on the ground, making sound that clearly bothered Louis, because I felt him kicking my foot under the table. I glared at him, while he stuck out his tongue at me, and I snorted a little.

I noticed that the rest of the boys got pretty silent, too, and the tension in the room just made me even more anxious, so I decided to cut the tension.

"I want to make a petition about not letting Niall and Louis near the kitchen anymore. Everyone who agrees with me, raise your hand!" I joked, raising my hand. Liam, Zayn and Harry raised their hands too, smiling, and Louis and Niall rolled their eyes, laughing a little bit.

"It's for the better, boys." Zayn said, sipping on his juice.

"True." Harry said and Liam nodded.

Louis gasped dramatically and put his hand on his heart.

"How dare our closest friends betray us like that, I can't believe it!" He said in a dramatic voice.

"And you, I can't believe you are the initiator of this, I thought that we were friends!" Niall joined, speaking dramatically too, and all of us laughed, the tension and the worries gone for a little bit, but not for too long, because right after we finished breakfast and Zayn and Liam were putting the dishes away (Louis and Niall insisted to help again, but me, Harry, Zayn and Liam quickly dismissed them), Liam's phone rang, and he told us that it was Simon.

Simon called us pretty much everyday, to tell us when the bus is going to pick us up for rehearsals, or to inform us something new about the first live show. He called Liam and Zayn the most, but he sometimes called me too, and everytime he called, all of us thought we screwed up about something, but in the end it was turning out that he was calling to say "The bus is going to pick you up in one hour, don't make the driver wait!" and that was it.

Liam picked up the phone, and after literally five seconds he said "okay, bye." and hung up.

"The bus is coming in two hours, guys..." He said a little nervous, looking at us. We nodded and I took a deep breath, trying to calm down, and I felt my stomach twisting.

I was still in my pajamas and I haven't brushed my teeth yet, so I went upstairs and brushed my teeth and washed away the sleepiness from my face, but even the cold water didn't help the puffiness around my eyes. I heard a knock on the door, and I rolled my eyes, opening the door with the toothbrush still in my mouth. It was Niall, and he smiled sweetly at me and waved his hand, gesturing me to go away from the bathroom. I squinted my eyes at him and tried telling him "you go away!" but it only resulted in me making unintelligible sounds. He laughed and closed the door, giving up on trying to shoo me away.

When I was ready, I opened the door to see Niall jumping up and down, probably waiting to have a wee, and when he saw that I was opening the door he quickly jolted forward, causing me to screech a little and jump out of the way. I heard him yelling "sorry!" from inside the bathroom, and I shook my head and walked back to my room. The thing I didn't like about the house was that we had only one bathroom for six people, and the toilet was inside of it, and most of the time when one of us wanted to go to the toilet and someone was showering or brushing his teeth, we either had to wait, or go outside in the tiny backyard to do our thing (of course, only the boys did it, but I almost did it once too).

I opened my wardrobe, thinking what should I wear. I loved clothes, and I loved experimenting with them, but in my everyday lifestyle I never wore skirts, or tiny tank tops like the girls my age, not because I didn't like them, but because I looked like a tree and everyone stared at my legs that looked like sticks shoved up my non existent ass, and I felt super uncomfortable. I went through a faze where I wore these things, and I really liked that I wore trendy clothes like the rest of the girls in my school, but I only got weird stares, and since then I never wore a skirt or a tank top again. I could proudly say that I had a healthy ammount of self-irony because of how many times I've been told to eat a cheeseburger, but that didn't mean that I wasn't hurt from it all, because it left a pretty decent wound in my mentality from a young age, that I still couldn't entirely heal. I pulled out a white knitted jumper, low rise dark blue jeans, and a platted white, brown and red scarf and quickly put them on. I didn't put make up on, because Simon told us that there are make up artists and stylists, and that they will do my make up and will style me and the boys, along with the other contestants.

Then I opened the drawer next to my bed, and pulled out the box with my goodluck earrings from grandma, and put them on, before walking downstairs to wait for the boys. Only Zayn was there, on the couch, watching TV on the tiny television, and when he heard that someone was approaching he turned around to see who it was.

"Wow, you're ready before the boys for the first time, congratulations!" He said sarcastically and gave me a little amused smile, and glued his eyes back to the TV. I rolled my eyes and sat on the armchair next to the couch, crossing my legs under me, the feeling of my guts twisting never stopping.

"I'm not in the mood for jokes, Zayn, I feel like I'm going to burst from nerves." I said quietly with a sigh and closed my eyes, trying to breath deeply.

"I'm nervous too, we all are... You don't have to worry about screwing up, you are singing the chorus, but I have a fucking solo part and I can't even start singing on time..." Zayn started but I quickly cut him off.

"You're going to do amazing, Zayn, you practiced a lot, you did it carelessly the last few rehearsals, don't worry about it." I said to him in a reassuring tone, trying to calm him down. He shook his head and stayed silent for a few moments. Then we heard steps behind us and when we turned around we saw Louis and Harry making their way down towards us with little frowns on their faces, seemingly nervous. Harry sat on the arm of armchair I was sitting on, while Louis made his way in the kitchen.

"Get away from the kitchen, Louis!" I yelled at him, and he yelled something back that I didn't quite hear, and walked out of the kitchen with a water bottle in his hands. "Quite surprising that you didn't shatter something."

"You're going to remind me for a long time, aren't ya?" Louis said while rolling his eyes and plopping himself next to Zayn.

"As long as I'm going to see you, love." I said sweetly to him with a smug smile, and the sentence I spoke got me thinking. What is going to happen after X Factor? Will we see each other again? I only knew them for a month or so, and I already got attached to them, and after X Factor was over I couldn't imagine what was going to be like without the boys running around, making me laugh, annoying me, making mess all around the house, making jokes and over all being with them in one house 24/7.

We waited for Niall and Liam to come downstairs, too, and when they got there, we had around ten or fifteen minutes left until the bus arrived. My hands were shaking, my thoughts were all over the place, and all I could think about was "What if I screw up and the boys get mad at me?". I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't even realize when these ten minutes passed until I heard a honk outside. I quickly looked at the boys, to find them looking at each other frantically, and we all quickly stood up and grabbed our jackets and put on our shoes the fastest way possible. We walked outside, I locked the door, and we all ran inside the bus, because it was super windy outside. We said hello to the driver, and sat down. This time I was next to Zayn, Harry and Louis were beside us and Liam and Niall were behind Harry and Louis.

"Are you nervous, guys?" The driver asked us.

"A little bit." I said back,