Yep, that's me! And yes, I still don't know to play soccer...

Oh, yeah, good times, also me! Oh, and um, there will be some time until I tell you about the boy in the gif...

Baby me on set for the first video of the band, still remember it as clear as a day when we filmed this video.

Another photograph of me, scene from our band's movie, you can see how happy I am to be back home.

Being put in a band of only boys at the age of fifteen was a very unexpected turn in my life, I can say, as well as four world tours, five studio albums, 242 awards, getting the public title "female rockstar of the century", broken engagement, three Victoria's Secret Fashion Shows (don't ask me how I managed to do that, I still have no idea), somewhat successful career in modeling, and being in the spotlight ever since I was sixteen and never coming back down. I would have never thought that this was going to be my life when I naively thought I was just moving away from home for two months and stepped on the stage of X Factor back in 2010, and well... you can say I never came back.

The biggest lesson I learned from all of this chaos is that you definitely have to expect the unexpected. Fame really is temporary, but the memories you get from it are going to stay with you for a lifetime, good or bad, and believe me, there is a good balance between good and bad in this world. I learned it the hard way.

I came across so many ups and downs, sexualizing, disrespect, false rumours, threats, just as much as tears from happiness, finding myself in what I do, learning to love unconditionally, forgiving, doing what I love and over all living my life how I wanted withou feeling guilty. A really good thought from a really close friend of mine stuck with me forever since the moment I heard it: "You should live your life the way that when you grow old you will be embarassed to tell your grandkids, but ecstatic to remember." I did exactly that, and even though I do feel a little embarrassed from all the stupid and truly embarrassing things I did back in the good old days, I think I'm ready to share what I experienced from all those years in the spotlight.

My name is Cara Maecee, and I will tell you every high and low point in my life, every moment I remember, starting from 23rd July, 2010, the absolute craziest day in my life.