☆UNEDITED☆

Published on 8th March 2021, 2:19 pm, IST

²⁷ To Be Loved

"I didn't know what it felt like to be loved or love someone."

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☆    TWO MONTHS. That's how long it had been since Rin had uttered the L- word to Sirius;

    And he had left her in the dark at the backyard without a single reply.

    Sirius regretted that move. He shouldn't have left her there; he should have said something.

    He just wasn't sure that the words were the same as her's.

    After that night, Sirius had avoided Rin to the best of his abilities.

    She had attempted to talk to him the first few times, but he skedaddled from her, running off whenever she approached him.

    He hated the heartbroken expression that came over Rin's features when he did this, but Sirius wasn't sure that he was ready to say those words back to her yet.

    Rin gave up trying to talk to him soon after.

    Sirius was pained as well.

    How do you know if you love someone?

    He hadn't experienced much of affection the first ten years of his life, that only changed when he met his best mates, his brothers at Hogwarts.

    He could wholeheartedly say that he loved them; he would die for any of them without question.

    But this- what he had with Rin- was romantic feelings.

    "Padfoot!" James called. "I'm going for Quidditch practice! Want to come along?"

    Sirius shook his head.

    He contemplated asking James for advice on what to do. James knew he loved Lily Evans.

    Sirius wanted to know how James realised that.

    But if he asked him, he might ask questions and, he might find out his secret.

    Sirius weighed the options.

    Reconciling with Rin was far more important to him than James finding out about Rin and him.

    "James!" Sirius called to him as he was exiting the dorm room.

    "Yeah, mate?"

    "How- Er, you love Lily, right?"

    "Yes?" James wondered where this was going.

    "How. . . how did you know you loved her?"

    James tensed and slowly walked to the bed where Sirius was sitting.

    "Why do you ask?"

    "I- I dunno," Sirius muttered, looking away. "Just tell me."

    "Well," James decided not to question his friend's motives. "I realised I loved her when I couldn't get her out of my head,"

    Sirius snorted.

    "No, quite literally, I mean. Whatever I was doing, all I could think about was 'Would Lily like what I'm doing?' 'Would Lily approve of this?' And things like that."

    "And whenever I look at her. . . " James got a dreamy look in his eyes. "It hurts when me when we're near each other, I can't hold her in my arms or kiss her. And it hurts when she's not near me, I just want to be near her forever."

    "Loving Lily," He continued. "Is also letting her go. She would never love me back, and it hurts like hell, but I'm willing to do whatever makes her happy, even if it's with another man, and I'll bear the pain, just if it means seeing her be happy."

    Sirius stared at the boy in surprise and brought a full force hug on him, James toppling of the bed at the force.

    "Whoa, mate!" James laughed. "Let me go! I have Quidditch practice in ten minutes!"

    Sirius laughed and let go, and stood up as soon as James left.

    He had to talk to Rin.

    He picked up the marauders' map and muttered the magical words, jabbing it with his wand.

    His eyes searched for Nesrin's name and dashed out of the dorm room and out of the portrait hole as soon as he saw the footprint patterns trailing after Nesrin's name around a hallway.

    Nesrin was walking through the hallways of Hogwarts, just having submitted her potions essay to Professor Slughorn.

    When someone pulled her into an empty classroom.

    "Rin," Sirius said apprehensively.

    "Sirius," Rin tugged her hand away from Sirius' grasp. "So you're talking to me, now?"

    "I'm sorry," Sirius sighed.

    "For what? For dating me?"

    "No! I'm here to say that-"

    "You don't love me back? Kind of figured that out-"

    Sirius interrupted her by slamming her into a wall, pulling her into a passionate kiss.

    "I do." He whispered against her lips, caressing her cheek. "I do love you back. I was just . . . shocked when you told me that. I- I've never had someone say to me, and. . . I panicked and left. I didn't know what it felt like to be loved or love someone. But James helped me by telling me how he knew he loved Lily-"

    "James?" Rin snorted. "James helped you?"

    Sirius grinned and resumed kissing her. "It was a pretty heartfelt moment."

    "Don't tell anyone," Rin wrapped her arm's around Sirius' neck and dragged him to a desk. "But I think Lily is starting to have feelings for James too!"

    "Really!"

    "Yeah! You should've seen her when I told her that James was the head boy with her! She was all like 'Ooh, that means that we'll have to spend a lot of time together to plan meetings and schedule stuff! How lovely!'"

   Sirius laughed, draping an arm around Rin.

"You know, Sirius," Rin mumbled, nuzzling into his embrace.

    "Yeah?"

    "I kind of miss you giving me pick-up lines with roses. It's been a while since I've heard any, it feels like you've stopped being romantic!"

    "Oh?" Sirius slipped out of the embrace and held up his wand and pointed it at a book.

    "Orchedious!"

    Sirius smirked and picked up the flower bouquet, previously a book, and handed it to Rin.

    "Here you go, love."

    Rin giggled and received the bouquet, bringing up to her nose.

    "Hey, Rin,"

    "Hm?"

   "Are you a camera?" He whispered, getting closer to her.

   ". . .No?"

    "Because every time I look at you, I smile."

    They locked their lips in a passionate embrace.

    "If I had a galleon for every time I thought of you, I'd have one galleon-"

    "What the-?"

    "Rin! Let me continue! Don't interrupt me!"

    "Fine!"

    "-I'd have one galleon because you never leave my mind."

    Rin kissed him again.

    "Mmph," He moaned, weaving a hand through her hair.

    "We should stop. . ." Rin mumbled

    "Do you want me to?"

    Rin made no reply but deepened the kiss.

    Neither made any move to stop, showing no signs of stopping any time soon.

    But they broke off in horror at the voice that interrupted them soon after.

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Sooooooo
My exams start this Friday (12th march) so I won't update for the next two weeks after that
This is my final exam and I am SO PUMPED to finish school!
And then I'll finish writing this book in a few days! And even get out the info for the sequel! (I have a bit of it planned out,  ut I haven't written anything down yet)
Anyways, I'll do one more update on the 13th, then it'll be 2 weeks later

Kathu

(Ps, HAPPY WOMENS DAY!!)