✧ min ho;

our table at matchado is completely covered—laptops open, scripts spread out, notebooks stacked on top of each other. my iced matcha is half-melted, condensation dripping onto the table, but i'm too focused to care.

i have a highlighter in my mouth, a pen in my hand, and my brain is split between writing down notes for our film and trying to ignore the fact that kitty is sitting way too close to me.

not that i mind.

she's scanning the class roster, finger trailing over the list of names. she's so focused that she doesn't even notice the way she's absentmindedly chewing on the end of her pen.

i smirk. "you're gonna break your teeth doing that."

she startles, blinking up at me. "huh?"

i nod toward her pen.

she pulls it away from her lips, narrowing her eyes at me. "i was not doing that."

"you were."

"was not."

i arch a brow.

she huffs. "whatever." she taps the screen of her laptop. "i'm trying to see who we should cast."

it was professor alex and i's idea for kitty to just be casted as the lead role for mia. there was no other choice. mia is charismatic, witty, passionate, and unpredictable.

we felt like no one else could be the character. besides kitty created her and i like to think she didn't even realize she wrote herself in the story.

i lean over slightly, glancing at the list. "so.. if you're playing mia, who's playing sebastian?"

kitty bites her lip. "well... we need people with actual acting skills."

"so not jin," i mutter.

kitty snickers. "definitely not jin."

i go back to writing notes in the margins of the script, twirling my pen between my fingers. kitty hums to herself, still scrolling. "what about dae?"

i pause. my grip on the pen tightens just a little.

kitty doesn't notice—she's too busy analyzing the list. "he's actually a really good actor."

i exhale through my nose, keeping my expression neutral. "you sure that's a good idea?"

kitty hesitates, and for a split second, she looks unsure. but then she shrugs. "he's professional enough to handle it."

i stay quiet, just nodding.

i hope she's right. because if we cast dae—if i have to watch him pretend to fall in love with kitty, even if it's just acting—i don't know how well i'll handle it.

"we still have to hold auditions," i say, stalling.

kitty tilts her head. "yeah, but—"

"so it's not automatically dae," i add quickly.

kitty purses her lips, looking thoughtful. "he is a singer and plays piano though."

i grip my pen a little tighter. yeah. i know.

dae being sebastian would make sense. he's a natural performer, and i know he'd kill the role. but i don't know if i can do that.

kitty keeps talking, oblivious to my inner turmoil. "what about my best friends in the film? i was thinking yuri and juliana."

i nod immediately. "that works. they'd be good."

kitty grins, typing it into the list. "okay, good. and for the dance numbers, we need choreographers."

she thinks for a second before snapping her fingers. "oh! what about Q and jin?"

i laugh. "jin? he's more hip-hop than jazz and contemporary."

"yeah but Q can do jazz and contemporary. plus i want it to be a little more modern and fresh," kitty explains. she smirks at me, "also... this gives them a chance to get to know each other and work together."

"yeah, okay," i mutter. "but if jin starts breakdancing in the middle of a jazz sequence, that's on you."

kitty rolls her eyes, still smiling. "noted."

i sit back, watching her finalize the cast list. things are slowly feeling normal between us again.

but the moment i see sebastian left blank on the screen, that uneasy feeling comes rushing back.

please let it be anyone but dae.

✧ kitty;

i spot dae before he sees me. he's standing near the entrance of a small clothing boutique on carnaby street, hands stuffed into his pockets, eyes flickering around like he's debating whether to stay or run.

he looks nervous.

i take a deep breath, reminding myself that i want this to go well. despite everything, dae has been a part of my life for as long as i can remember.

i walk up to him, offering a small smile. "hey."

his head snaps up, and his expression softens slightly. "hey."

the air between us is awkward, and i hate it.

i glance around, looking for something—anything—to make this feel normal again. my eyes land on a small japanese restaurant down the street, a cozy-looking place i passed on my way here.

"want to eat now??" i suggest. "i saw a japanese place a few minutes ago, and it looked really good."

dae nods quickly, relief flashing in his eyes. "yeah. yeah, that sounds good."

we start walking in silence, but i refuse to let the awkwardness settle in.

i glance at him, breaking the ice. "so... how have you been?"

dae exhales, his hands still stuffed in his pockets. "okay, i guess. just... kinda sad."

i bite the inside of my cheek. "i never wanted you and min ho to fight."

he looks at me then, his brows furrowing.

"i'm sorry for everything... i don't think i'm worth all this drama," i add, giving him a sheepish smile.

dae shakes his head. "you didn't do anything wrong."

his voice is quiet but firm, and for the first time since everything happened, i feel like we might actually be able to talk.

"i know i didn't do anything wrong," i say carefully. "but neither did min ho."

dae doesn't respond. he just keeps walking beside me, staring straight ahead.

i take a breath, steadying myself. "we can't control how we feel, dae. and you had no right to expect me not to like him and make me promise that i wouldn't."

he flinches slightly, but still doesn't say anything. i wait for him to argue, to push back the way he always does, but he just keeps walking.

silence settles between us as we reach the restaurant. we step inside, the warmth from the heaters instantly wrapping around us.

a hostess greets us, and within minutes, we're led to a small table near the window.

dae thanks her softly before sliding into his seat. i sit across from him, studying his face, trying to figure out what's going through his head.

it's hard to tell.

he's not glaring, not angry—not the way he was with min ho. but he's also not the easygoing dae i've known my whole life.

he's just... quiet.

finally, he exhales and looks up at me, his jaw tight, "i've liked you for a while now, kitty."

my breath catches.

"probably longer than i should have," he continues, his voice quieter now. "and it sucks seeing you fall so easily for someone else when i've been here this whole time."

my stomach turns upside down.

oh.

the weight of his words sits heavy on my chest. guilt creeps in, even though i know deep down this isn't something i can fix. i can't control how i feel. i can't change the way my heart works.

i swallow hard and look at him, my voice soft. "dae..."

he watches me, his expression unreadable, but his fingers are curled into fists on the table.

"i'm sorry," i whisper. his shoulders tense.

"i love you, i do," i say carefully. "and i care about you, but... not in that way."

dae flinches, just barely.

"you've always been a friend to me," i continue, my throat tightening. "and i'm so sorry if i ever made you feel like there was something more. i never wanted to hurt you."

his eyes flicker with something i can't quite place—hurt, disappointment, maybe even frustration.

for a second, i think he might get up and leave. but he doesn't. instead, he just nods, looking down at his hands.

and somehow, that feels even worse.

the weight of everything lingers between us, heavy and unspoken. i don't know what to say to make this better, and honestly, i don't think anything can right now.

so i do the only thing i can— i tell the truth.

"min ho was the one who wanted me to talk to you," i admit, my voice careful. "he told me before anything happens between us, i should try to fix things with you first."

dae's head lifts slightly, but he doesn't say anything.

"he didn't want us to lose our friendship over this," i continue. "and i don't either."

dae exhales, running a hand through his hair. "i just... i still need time. from him. from all of this."

i nod, swallowing down the sting in my chest. "i get it."

and i do. i know this isn't something he can just get over in a day. i know he needs space, and i know i have to respect that.

but it doesn't make this any easier.

for a brief moment, i consider telling him about me and min ho.

about what we admitted to each other.

but there's too much going on right now. dae just opened up to me about his feelings, and i know that if i tell him, it'll only make everything worse.

so i don't.

instead, i give him a small, tentative smile. "we'll figure this out."

dae doesn't smile back, but he nods.

i don't have the heart to break his again.