Tony sighed staring at Clay in front of what looked to be an abandoned building. "I'm telling you we didn't find him at the first spot so we should stop looking. If we find him he's gonna be messed up and he's just going to hurt Maddie and himself." Tony wanted no part in this, he could see Maddie was getting better bringing Justin back? There was no telling how that would effect her healing process. Clay rolled his eyes and walked into the building without saying a word and Tony sighed before quickly following him trying to convince himself that this could help Maddie more than hurt her.

"Incentive, we have to offer money. Give me some money and I'll pay you back." Rolling his eyes Tony pulls out a ten and hands it to Clay as he turns around and asks a girl if she'd seen him there, when she stands but only says maybe he offers her the money making her quickly grab it and tell them where to go.

"There he is!" Clay says pointing when he sees his jacket. "Justin!" Tony says as he quickly walks across the skate park to him. "Yo Foley!" Sighing when they see it wasn't him they start questioning. "Where'd you get that jacket?"

"What?"

"You heard him man, the jacket. Where'd you get it?" Tony asks backing Clay up. "Goodwill. The fuck is it to you?" The guy asks annoyed making Tony walk forward. "Don't fuck with me man."

"Yeah, okay, Tiny." The guy teases but instantly regrets it when Tony shoves him to the ground making him roll across the concrete. Tony quickly pushes Clay back and throws the guy back to the ground when he attempts to tackle Tony. Tony then quickly grabs him and throws him against the wall. "Who the fuck do you think you are?" He asks and Clay being nervous shouts for him to stop. "Waste my time and I will fucking end you, understand?" Tony asks his voice on edge. Clay quickly grips onto Tony's jacket trying to get him off but it doesn't work. "Where is he?" He asks pressing even more into the other guys face.

"He was sparing change on BART a couple weeks back."

"When's the last time you saw him?"

"Yesterday, in Chinatown." Tony quickly throws a punch so hard that it makes the guy crash into the ground. "That's our friend that fucking belongs to." Tony shouts pulling Justin's jacket off the boys body.

"Tony come on." Clay says nervous and this time Tony listens and they quickly walk out. "Where did that come from?" Clay asks.

"Take the jacket." Tony says before they go back into his car and they make their way to Chinatown to hopefully find Justin.

"Wait. Wait, wait. I think that's him." Clay says looking out the window a dirty looking Justin slouched against the wall. "Justin." Clay says as he starts to get out of the car only for Justin to quickly grab his things and make a run for it. "Wait! Justin! God damn it." Clay curses and starts running after him. Clay quickly gained on him and tackled Justin to the ground, but a man comes out complaining about kids being near his business making both Clay and Justin run the other way.

"Justin! Justin!" Clay shouts but when Justin continues to try and run Clay resorts to all he can think of. "Maddie wants you back!" Clay shouts making Justin stop though he continues to bounce. "Fuck you."

"No, she does. I just talked to her yesterday!" Clay asks and Justin shakes his head. "She wants me gone! Her and Jessica both decided that!"

"No she doesn't! She wants you to come back! She never wanted you to leave and Jessica only thought you'd leave her alone." Clay pants while arguing with the dust and dirt covered boy. Justin just stands there but they both turn when they hear sirens.

"I will leave both of you if you don't get in my fucking car now!" Tony shouts from behind the bars on a fence making both boys run and jump into the red mustang.

Justin sits in silence at a stop next to a store listening to Clay talk to the answering michine of Skye. "In my experience a girl who doesn't call you back is a girl who doesn't wanna talk to you." Justine says picking at his nails making Clay scoff and turn to face him. "Really? You're gonna tell me about your experience?" Clay asks sarcastically.

"Look, all I'm saying is that Skye Miller is a piece of work. She's fucked up. And trust me when you find a girl who is fucked up it takes a lot of time to help heal her." Justin says biting his nails. "Maybe you got there too late."

"I think you should stop talking, like, for the foreseeable future."

"Good. You're alive." Tony says walking out of the store before throwing Justin a water bottle. Justin stares at him and Tony sighs. "Drink." He says watching Justin who quickly gulps the water down. "You're welcome." Clay says annoyed at how Tony was handling him so well. "You'll feel much better after a meal." Tony says but yet Clay has to butt in again. "And a shower."

"Fuck you." Justin says upset with an eye roll.

Sighing Tony intergets, yet again. "Is your mom still living in the same place?" Tony asks since he knew the apartment because he used to pick up Maddie some times. "Shit, I can't go back there." Justin says looking up making Clay frown. "What? Why?"

"I took some money from her boyfriend before I left. If he finds out I'm there, he'll kill me."

"So what the fuck do we do with him now?" Tony asks upset, he'd spent his whole day chasing after someone he wasn't sure would help anything and now he had no place to stay?

Maddie sighs while driving through the street, she had gotten an early text from Clay saying that he would most likely be late to school, considering Maddie knew the way and she needed her notes for bonus on a test she was most likely going to fail she made her way to Clay's house. When Maddie makes to Clay's place she realizes his parents were gone and quickly runs inside and makes a B-line for his bedroom.

"Do you think Maddie would want to see you like this?" Maddie hears Clay ask through the walls. She scrunches up her eyes and knocks on the door. "Clay? Hey, it's me. I don't want to bother you but I need my notes for the test today." Maddie says standing outside waiting for Clay to open the door. After some whispers and some moving Clay finally opens the door but only enough to show his face and hand her the notes.

"Uhm, thanks. Who's in here with you?" Maddie asks grabbing the notes and shoving them into her bag. "What? Nobody." Clay quickly defends himself making Maddie chuckle.

"I heard you say something about me not wanting to see them, who is it? Listen I know it's not Skye because she left but I'm not gonna judge you if you're moving on quickly." Maddie says with an understanding smile.

Clay chuckles and quickly goes with the lie knowing he'd have nothing better to say. "Thanks Maddie, but I can't tell you because it has to stay a secret." Maddie nods and tells him good-bye before quickly leaving to her car.

Clay turns back around with a sigh but see's Justin looking through the window. "Dude! What are you doing get down!" Clay says tackling the boy to the ground. "I just wanted to see her." Justin defends himself with teary eyes, he hadn't even gotten a letter in five months, sure she had every right but it didn't mean it hurt him any less. "Well you can see her when you're clean." Clay says and Justin looks down nodding slightly.

Making his way through the hall Clay quickly finds the curly haired girl. "Jess! Jessica!" Clay shouts running to Jessica. "Yes?" Jessica asks closing her locker, she had just spoken with the school about her assault and the person trying to silence her and she wasn't in the mood to talk to someone who didn't want to learn what she'd been through but still wanted her to out it to the whole world. "We have Justin." He wasn't sure if he should talk to Maddie or Jess first, or if it even involved Jess but Tony said not to talk to Maddie until he was clean.

"What-why are you telling me?" Jessica asks, she wanted nothing to do with Justin. Sure she felt guilty at times but in her mind Maddie was safer because she told Justin to leave. "Because he's gonna get better and we're gonna take him to the Bakers' lawyer. He can back up Hannah's story." Jessica's eyebrows furrow. "It's not Hannah's story, and it's not his story. It's mine. And none of you have a right to keep trying to bring it out."

"Jess. Jess. Listen to me." Clay says while looking around. "Justin wants to help Jess. And if nothing else Bryce did something to Maddie and he can-" Justin looks around and whispers to Clay. "Shut up Clay. That's not right of you to bring up. Hell, have you even talked to Maddie about it? She doesn't want to bring it up let alone in court nor does she want Justin to be brought into it. And you claim to be a friend of her's do you realize what bringing Justin back after five months is gonna do to her? No, you don't. Because you don't care." Jessica says upset because leaving quickly when hearing Zach and Bryce approach from behind them.

"Hey, Mads there you are." Zach says looking at his sister who just ran up and tucked herself under Monty's arm. "Yeah, I had to get my notes from Clay." Maddie explains as Zach goes back to his conversation with Scott about his history class test. "Why don't you ask your boyfriend for help with history?" Monty asks making Maddie chuckle lightly at the small joke until he takes it too far for Maddie's liking. "Oh, wait. He's brain damaged." He says laughing and Maddie moves slightly away from him and closer to Scott who also seemed uncomfortable with that type of joke.

"Monty, that's not something to joke about." Maddie says rolling her eyes while crossing her arms. and Zach complains about possibly dropping to a C.

"Just use the dad card, he'll let you slide."

"It's not a card man." Zach says upset and Bryce turns slightly stopping. "No, I know. Fuck, sorry, brother." He says clasping his hand on Zach shoulder trying to show him that he meant no harm before he turns to the other Dempsey in their mix. "Maddie, I didn't mean anything by it." He says and she nods slightly as Monty wraps his arm around her. "I know." She fakes a smile making him turn around, she was getting good at faking smiles around him.

Maddie turns off. "We'll see ya Maddie." The boys and Chloe wave her off as she enters her class ready to start her test.

Towards the end of the day Clay cornered Tony. "What the fuck Tony. You didn't tell me about Sherri?" He asks and Tony sighs while fixing his bag. "That's because I knew you'd say no. I can't be part of this anymore alright? It's fucking dangerous and I'm still on probation."

Clay furrows his brows before speaking again. "Since when do you care? You said it was no big deal." Tony slams his locker in frusteration. "That's when I thought this case would settle and I wouldn't be helping detox a junkie so he could." Clay sighs shaking his head.

"Jess doesn't want him to testify. She doesn't want it told." Tony sighs. "If that's what she wants then that's fair more than enough people already know and she never told anyone." Tony was upset, he was mature, almost an adult yet for the past year Clay had constantly been pulling him into stuff that could really hurt him as well as his family.

"Yeah? Well what about Maddie?" Clay asks and Tony moves his bag. "I told you what Maddie wants. She doesn't even want to talk about him, that's how bad she's hurt by him leaving, but you know what will hurt worse? Bringing in a junkie who wants nothing more than to go get high and leave again." Tony says before stomping off, he cared for Maddie and wasn't sure what the best thing was but he didn't think bringing Justin back was it.

Sherri sighs for the umpteenth time in a row. Justin wasn't cooperating very well and she was going to have to start using the Maddie card to get him too. "Take this." She says and he shakes his head while wrapping himself in a blanket. "Do you want to see Maddie and redeem yourself so you can be together again?" Sherri asks upset and sighs when he nods. "Okay then stop being such a little bitch and get yourself better." She says holding out the small bottle for him to take which he does. "You're welcome." She says rolling his eyes.

Maddie sighs sitting at her desk, she felt like everyone was avoiding her when just yesterday everyone was being so kind. All the guys ignored her the rest of the day, which wasn't so bad, but Sherri didn't text her back and Jess refused to answer her calls. Clay fled the room everytime Maddie entered and Zach didn't even talk to her, she felt more alone than she had in awhile. So she did what she always did. She wrote, specifically she wrote to Justin.

"Hey, Justin, It's me again. I know you'll never see these but I wonder how you're doing. I wonder if you've thought of me, if you've regretted leaving. But I doubt you have, if you did you would have came back to me. I keep a playlist for you now. I have one song repeated three time in there with the lyrics 'if you love someone let them go' and I always think about you. I hope you're doing well, that you've found some place to sleep, that you still have some clothes and you have food in your stomach and that you haven't decided to go to any prostitutes or hookers or maybe even a girlfriend. I mean I suppose I can't hate you if you have because I guess in a way I'm the one that told you to leave, but we also never broke up. I hope no one has hurt you and I hope that you haven't broken yourself down. I also hope that I will once again see you. But I know I won't, I know you're gone. And I hate you. I hate you because you left without telling me, you left with a hug or a kiss, and you broke my heart. You hurt me and I hate you for it because when your name is mentioned around me I can't breathe. But I also hate myself because I still dream of you and every time I see you I get butterflies." Sighing she signs her name on the bottom, sticks it in an envelope, writes the date and sticks it with the other in a locker drawer before crawling under the covers on her bed, and going to sleep.

~~~Authors Note~~~

Hey guys! I hope you're liking this book so far, I have a lot of ideas but there's also a few things that I'm still questioning, as we get closer I will address my concerns with you all! Thank you for reading and voting it means a lot!
Also for some reason the gifs aren't working right now. If I save them and put them in like I normally do it's just a picture and if I copy and paste it doesn't load, so when the gifs work again I'll come back and put new ones in but until then I guess I'm out.

{5.3.20}