"Where the fuck am I?"

"You really can't finish without a sentence without cursing, do you?"

"Yow, I find it so funny when hyung woke up and started cursing! like, bro, he's back! But his cursing is also back! I can't anymore."

"Atleast we didn't messed up his brain or something, but, I wish we could have made him forget cussing. You know it's bad for the kids.."

"Can someone between you three fucking idiots just explain what's going on? I'm having a headache from seeing your bullshit scattering with my own eyes."

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You are at his room, sitting on the bed as you fold your newly dried clothes. You also brought the kids inside since no one can watch over them downstairs. You actually can trust Dopyo when he's alone but you can never rely Daisy because, who knows what will your daughter do without any supervision.

If she can do disruptive things within your own eyes, what more if no one was looking after her?

Your eyes then trailed onto Daisy who is sitting on the right part of the bed, playing with her little fingers to escape from boredom. You tried reading her mind, no sign of thoughts shown. Daisy then raised her head and smirk. She slowly went down on the tall bed and roam around the room, you let her do what she wants and went back on folding your clothes.

In the middle of folding, your mind suddenly though of him. You froze and stare blankly, mind being preoccupied on the memories of Doyoung. There are days you unconsciously think about him, most likely because you miss him a lot.  You sharply sigh, you really wished he'll go back but you really don't want to put your hopes high, maybe somethings weren't destined to go back to you.

"Mommy, who is this guy?" you went back to reality when Daisy asked you, your head shifted to her, she was sitting on a chair and was looking at the white desk,  eyes looking the grid wall photo frame that is placed in front of her. You stood up and walked towards her seat, head looking down, you halt when you see Daisy holding a polaroid film, it was a photo of you and Doyoung from the date you two have on a park. You remembered it clearly, you let out a weak smile. "Mommy who's this, you two look happy here."  she commented, observing the photo. She never saw you that happy, the photo was beyond explainable how happy you were, back then.

 You have no words or have the audacity to tell her about him. You never have the guts to tell the things about him, it's not that you're being selfish, no, you love your kids. It's just that you don't want them to know that their father isn't alive anymore, you don't want them to feel sad that they will never get to meet and know him ever. That's why, you never told them about him ever since. You weren't ready to tell the twins about Doyoung yet and will never will be. 

You shake your head when she called you again, eyes glistering in such curiosity and innocence. You weren't ready nor wanted to talk about it, thus making you ask for the photo and placing it back to the grid, where Doyoung placed it. Daisy wanted to grab it but you carried her away from the desk. "Baby, let's not talk about that photo, okay?" you smiled at her, Daisy being confused and kept asking why. "It's better that you stay away from the table, got that sweetie?" you asked Daisy, who is really dazed as you place her down the bed, but nonetheless, she nodded quietly.

You distracted yourself from the thought of him as you finish folding the clothes and put them into their respective cabinet. You were trying to compose yourself as you wished you won't breakdown on the twins. You kept convincing that you're fine and you already moved on, even if it feels so wrong, you kept repeating it to your mind, telling yourself that he will never come back again and you're fine with it.

But who are you kidding, you keep finding yourself lies..

"Mom?" you hummed, carefully putting down your shirts on the column before you close the door and face Dopyo. You sat down beside him, your hands reaching as you as you hold them softly, gently squeezing the little hand. "The shirt seems new." he commented, innocently.

"What do you mean?" you blink your eyes and looked down, a gasp realizing that you wore Doyoung's shirt. Another habit you unconsciously have when you miss him and the feeling of him with you. You're really messed up this following days as you reminisce your late boyfriend.

"I never see you wear that, mommy." Dopyo said, in a matter of fact. He move himself forward, towards you. "And it doesn't smell like you." he pointed out, nose sniffing the foreign scent.

You were astonished at how Dopyo was being observant about you, making you caressed his soft curls. You've heard from Ten (it was really shocking that Ten has been reading facts from babies and kids, when it's not him to do that at all) that your kid can distinguish what you wear and mostly, memorized their scent. It was pretty amazing that he can differentiate your smell towards other people. But you frowned, guess your kids caught you on wearing their father's shirt and missing him.

"How about we went downstairs since mommy needs to do the laundry." you suggested, steering the topic instantly. You see how dazed the twins are on your weird behavior but you scoop the two and carried them, you notice the kids gained weight again. "Oh you two are growing up too fast, maybe later on mommy can't carry you two anymore." you coo, frowning. You heard a loud laugh from the two from your remark, making you laugh too.

You carried the two and you even think that maybe this will be the last time you're going to carry them together. They're growing rapidly and you really can feel any moment you'll drop them but you keep yourself strong and manage to put them at the couch safely and not making an accident. You should stop carrying them together even it breaks your heart, they're just growing too fast and it's making you feel emotional. It feels like yesterday that the two are too fragile to be touch but now, look at them, a few days left and they'll officially be students.

You instructed the twins to stay at the living room and watch tv while you do your laundry. You gave them some biscuits to eat and two plastic cups of milk. You even told a specific reminder for Daisy to not go anywhere and stay put, your daughter nodding and assuring you she'll behave this time. You told the kids to not go near the tv for the sake of their eyesight and remind them that if they need anything, let them call you if ever.

You watched the twins for two minutes, making sure that they aren't going to do anything that can harm themselves. Once you see the two being good kids, you finally went off towards the laundry room and wash your kids' clothes. Sitting down on a small chair as you space out. You really didn't expect your eldest on being curious and getting the picture, you really didn't that it will happen ever. You hid your face o your palms, groaning. You should reconsider yourself on thinking ways on handling their questions about him.

It's not like you can keep Doyoung's true identity to them forever, your kids are smart, they know stuff than you expected them to know off.

You looked down on your knees and sighed, you just miss him badly. It was hard to even attempt to forget about him, the kids share his genes, the photos you have with him, you're literally staying on his room to sleep, his stuff that wasn't touched nor move into another place and you randomly having a dream with him at most nights. "How can I move on when literally I'm the one who's stopping myself on trying?" you scoffed, a timid smile plaster as you shut your eyes. The past haunting your mind and torturing you with unbearable pain. You could have get a place away from here, you can remove his things and hid the pictures, but you can't.

You just want a peace of mind for once, is that too much to ask?

You jumped in fright when you heard the timer of the washing machine buzz, making your senses heightened. You exhaled at relief and turn the timer for another nine minutes and proceed on sitting down again.  You notice the two giggling loudly but you can't hear the tv being on now. You squint your eyes, wanting to check on the kids but let out a smile when you heard them.

"Grandpa Moon!"

You smiled and decided to exit the laundry room, only to see your kids hugging Taeil. The vampire let out a chuckle and stroke the kids' hair. He really missed the kids and since he have time today, he decided to drop by. You towards the man, waving your hand and letting out a scoff, he really loves spoiling the kids a lot. "You shouldn't have bought them toys, they still have a lot." you mumbled in concern. You just dislike the idea of the twins getting spoiled.

"Oh c'mmon y/n," Taeil rolled his eyes, squatting down as he feels delighted the the twins liked the toys he bought, opening them and playing in front of the both of you. "I rarely visit and what's bad on spoiling my grandkids?" he asked, a smirk showed as he observes the two, cheekily smiling when the two were surprised that plushie he gave made a loud squeak.

"You suddenly have free time, that's really shocking." you commented, making Taeil halt and stand up, brows creased at you. You were staring at him sharply, still have grudges on the times he can't visit but you didn't want to make it obvious. You really don't want to be petty since your kids are in front of you. You just had to let go the anger and forget about it. It wasn't his fault that he's always busy. You then remembered what Jaehyun noticed on the previous day. "Dad, your son told me that you've been acting weird lately." you scoffed, making Taeil freeze at his place. He didn't expect you to ask about that.

You've been playing Johnny's response on repeat, you not believing the male at all as much as you wanted to. You feel like he's lying at you. Of course, he's Taeil's assistant, he know the man from head to toe. And you know how loyal the tall male is on his master and would even lie if needed. You just wanted to know whatever they are hiding from you.

"Me? weird?when?" he asked, giving you a confused look. He didn't know whatever you're talking about and you can feel his act clearly. "I wasn't even that weird okay." he defended himself,  face grimacing at you.

"And besides," he cleared his throat, eyes staring at you serious. You tried reading his mind but you mentally cursed, he was unreadable. "If someone between the two of us is weird, it's Jae, I mean that guy is weirded than I could ever be. He's just making you worried at non sense y/n, you shouldn't trust Jaehyun on those accusations."

"He isn't accusing you, he just notice it, alright?" you answered, your voice raised unintentionally. Your eyes saw the kids getting  frightened. You mumbled a sorry and told them to continue playing before your eyes went back to him, a brow raised at him. "Just quit the lies and tell me." you whispered, angrily.

"Tell you what?"

"Stop with the innocence, just tell me the truth." you begged, whisper shouting at him, your pupils being dilated as you weren't liking the situation you put himself too. You don't get it as to why he denying things that you're just asking nicely at.

"I really don't know what you're talking about y/n." Taeil said, now a tint of nervousness on his voice. You smirked at him and asked for the last time, hoping he did tell whatever he's doing. But, he didn't instead, his phone beep. "Guess I'll be going back now, sorry." he scratched his nape.

"Already?" the twins whined, you noticing that they've been eavesdropping since then and not really playing.

"Aw, don't be sad. Grandpa Moon will go back soon, he promise." he assured the kids, making you scoff. He couldn't have raise the twins' hopes up since you know it will take months for him to visit, or even a year. "Just be good kids to your mom, okay?" he pecked a kiss on the two's cheeks and smiled widely.

"We will!"

The kids bid goodbye on the man and you did the same, faking a smile and still mad at him. He instanly disappear making you hissed at the conversation you have with him. It was obvious that he is lying and was caught red handed but why can't he just admit it? he just need to say what he's been doing. It was a simple question but why did he have to make it complicated?

And most likely, why is he keeping it from you and Jaehyun? what is he really up to?

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c'mmon taeil, tell y/n the truth already. we need justice here ;//