squid squad

2 members are active

ice bear
changmin

panda
chanhee

panda
we need to talk

ice bear
obviously

ice bear
what did younghoon tell you?

panda
he told me to make a choice

ice bear
yeah same

ice bear
and fuck him for that

ice bear
why does he put so much pressure on us?? as if this is something one can decide over night

panda
dont curse him out

ice bear
why not? after all, hes really annoying and impatient

panda
chanhee, this has been going on for ages now

panda
to be fair, we really had a lot of time to actually think about it. we both knew he liked us two, we were simply in denial and that is our own fault

ice bear
if i was able to, i would just disappear instead of picking

panda
i feel you

ice bear
i dont wanna lose younghoon, but i doubt this is gonna work out

panda
you got a point

panda
whats your answer though? i mean, you cant just not make a choice and leave

ice bear
i care about younghoon a lot

panda
me too

ice bear
but i really dont know about this

ice bear
younghoon seems so selfish

panda
no he does not

ice bear
yes he does, he isnt considering our feelings at all and only acts for himself by doing this

panda
what else is he supposed to do if he likes two people at the same time who dislike each other but like him both?

panda
i think what younghoon is doing is just desperately pushing answers out of us so he can finally settle

ice bear
oh so we dont need to settle or..??

panda
it must be stressful liking two people who arent up for what he is up for

panda
so i understand his point of view and personally think that he has every right to get an answer out of us

ice bear
its not enough time to think about something like this though

ice bear
this isnt "which color do u want ur iphone to be?" this is something very challenging to deal with

panda
we dont have much time chanhee

ice bear
fuck no, dont you dare start with the same bullshit as younghoon now

panda
face reality

ice bear
not now

panda
you have to

ice bear
stop pressuring me oh my god

panda
you act like i didnt have to make a choice, even while going through bad times???

panda
seriously, instead of complaining, how about you sit down for a second and ACTUALLY THINK ABOUT IT?

panda
i bet you didnt think it through even once

panda
of course its equal to torture having to make a choice, but just go and get it done with

ice bear
seriously fuck you

panda
grow up.

ice bear
i just dont know what to do, why is it that hard to understand?

panda
i didnt know either

panda
until i realized that younghoon always tried his best and put in so much effort to make us get along in some way and we were the ones ruining it all the time

ice bear
how is having your own emotions ruining it??

panda
its not that

panda
we never showed him any gratefulness

panda
like yes, he was super dense about it, but in hindsight he did it because he loves us

ice bear
i just dont know

ice bear
but you seem to have made your choice already

panda
yeah

panda
i think i will agree to trying it out

panda
after all, younghoon is extremely caring and loving. he would make sure that we are more than comfortable at all times, just like he would make us happy

panda
i know that he doesnt have any intentions i disagree with in any way, despite not being interested in you

panda
he has done much for me, so i can return this favor once

ice bear
you make it seem like going after my own needs is selfish

panda
you called younghoon selfish for going after his own needs

ice bear
younghoons needs affect two other people

panda
well, thats your opinion i guess

panda
you seriously need to understand that your choice is very powerful right now

panda
this puts you under a lot of pressure, i understand, but its the truth

panda
there is no inbetween, your choice will either destroy our bond or challenge it

ice bear
changmin i came here for advice on what to pick

ice bear
and also a discussion

ice bear
but youre not making it any easier for me

panda
i know

panda
i had to realize that i would never be able to make a choice if i stayed the way i was before, which btw was exactly how youre like rn

panda
let me help you then

ice bear
fine

panda
what do you want?

ice bear
i want to be with younghoon

panda
what does younghoon want?

ice bear
he wants to be with both of us

panda
what are his expectations of us?

ice bear
he expects us to be able to come to terms with the fact that he wants to have separate romantic bonds with the two of us

panda
what is younghoons wish for the future?

ice bear
probably that the two of us get along well so that we can develop further i guess??

panda
what is stopping you from getting what you want?

ice bear
you

panda
why do you think im interfering?

ice bear
because you like younghoon and younghoon likes you back

panda
what do you wish for younghoon?

ice bear
to be happy, always

panda
what would make younghoon happy?

ice bear
being together with both of us

panda
what makes you happy, regarding younghoon?

ice bear
if he does well in life

panda
dont you want him to be happy then?

ice bear
youre manipulating the answers out of me

panda
yeah i know

ice bear
stop being so selfish. youre trying to convince me just so that you can live your best life with younghoon while discarding me after a while

ice bear
my happiness isnt younghoons happiness and neither is his happiness mine

panda
you make no sense

ice bear
i do

ice bear
im not talking about happiness as a feeling, but about the cause of our happiness

panda
im gonna get a headache

ice bear
i dont want to lose younghoon

panda
you know what the only option would be then

ice bear
changmin, just because you want to have something intimate with younghoon doesnt give you the right to pressure me to agree

ice bear
youre not helping me make a choice

panda
chanhee i dont think that you grasp what younghoons idea is

panda
not only will him and i have an intimate bond, but you two will too

panda
i know the concept of sharing a romantic partner is just odd and that its really unfamiliar

panda
and that feeling of unfamiliarity is probably what scares you away

panda
i felt the same thing, until i decided to sit down and actually brainstorm ideas and then do research afterwards to find out how everything works

panda
if you agree, we will either fall apart slowly or we can learn to build something new using our many imperfections as a fundamental

panda
all of this isnt one inevitable, set choice

panda
there are many ways of experimenting with this, after all, it would be something new for all three of us

panda
what i think would make us unique are the many possibilities and the freedom monoarmorous people dont have

panda
and again, younghoon is a good guy. he wants no harm and would learn how to accept it, if any of us ever decide to drop out of it

panda
im sorry for pressuring you earlier, you were right. i was being selfish because i really want to keep my relationship with younghoon, but so do you, right?

panda
i just want to stop with the rivalry, im so sick of it

panda
if we communicate constantly and are open about our thoughts and feelings, we could give it a shot and see if its really as bad as we keep making it out to be

panda
if it makes you feel more comfortable, we can establish rules too!

panda
i just dont want to give this up without trying

panda
please?

ice bear
fuck

ice bear
see, if you say it like this everything is ten thousand times easier you moron

ice bear
i guess you are right in some way...

ice bear
if we really do agree to this then

ice bear
i have a few conditions

panda
really??? youd agree????

ice bear
shut up dont interrupt my thought process

panda
yes yes sorry!

ice bear
i would want to take things very very VERY slowly

ice bear
i still dont like you too much and i cant just switch my feelings towards you like turning the lights on or off

ice bear
i dont want to see any of your and younghoons romance bullshit before you grow on me

ice bear
once i find you decent enough, i still want to take it slow

ice bear
i need to feel comfortable first and im warning you that it could take YEARS for me to get used to this

ice bear
this is all i have to say. idc what you think about this and idc if any of you even agree with my conditions, goodbye.

ice bear is offline!

1 member is active

panda
eh

panda
a start, i guess

🌺

hi like i promised, heres a summary of my new book which ill probably release in like five days or something <3

[insert title i havent decided yet] is a juyeon x jaehyun centered gang au with some sideships included. with themes like violence or rather sexual contents, it is a more mature story i wanted to challenge myself with.

it all starts when ex-police officer lee juyeon gets released out of prison after a bit longer than a year, imprisoned because he pointed his gun at his deputy chief kim younghoon.

shortly after his release, he walks into the bar owned by a well-respected member of one of seoul's most powerful gangs, lead by lee sangyeon. sipping on his drink while sitting at the counter, juyeon notices sangyeon's most prized posession, lee jaehyun, midst a conflict.

the younger decides to step in and involve himself in the fight to help jaehyun out, which he successfully manages to do so. not much longer after, he leaves. however, this incident sticks with jaehyun, who is now looking out for juyeon in hopes to come across the other another time, as the younger piqued his interest quite a bit.

their intentions are somewhat similar, yet juyeon is seeking something completely different. what will happen if the two cross paths, in a way that is far more impactful and unpredictable for both?

yeah lol idk, i hope it sounds interesting enough HAJSK-