Tuesday, February 8, 1966

☆ﾐ ROSE

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   I'M AROUND 5 weeks into my pregnancy approximately 6 weeks meaning I will be close to being 2 months pregnant. I've been feeling the exact same since I've found out. I've been debating over my options which have been awfully hard. Hazel has been leaning towards wanting me to keep the baby but she doesn't get that this is overwhelming than what she thinks. I haven't told anyone other than Hazel and wasn't intending to tell anyone else. At school, Cherry has recognized my change of mood but hasn't questioned it. And recently, I haven't been going around the Curtis House and made Hazel lie and say I was busy studying which they believed since it was around the times of my exams.

I had simply dropped and picked up Hazel at their house and that's about it. I felt miserable not being able to be close to the gang but I couldn't see Dal or anyone else without wanting to cry or yell out the truth.

"Come on Rose you shouldn't get an abortion aren't those dangerous? Look what about adoption I know it will be rather hard carrying a baby for nine months but please we can find a nice family for it." she begged as I was currently driving her over to the Curtis house. I had mentioned abortion to her which had been heavy on my mind. I know it was risky and I can get in huge trouble if anyone found out but I can't carry a baby I'm only 16 especially Dallas Winston's baby.

"You don't fully understand Hazel! This is Dallas Winston's child we're speaking about. I can't keep it I can't raise a baby alone. And adoption I would get to attached Hazel!" I shouted out as we had ultimately arrived in front of the house. She appeared to be stunned since I've never gotten that angry or loud with her. I didn't mean to but right now I was going through the hardest time of my life. This choice whatever one I decided to do would not be easy and I knew it.

"I'm so sorry Hazel. I'm just so stressed about this and I didn't mean to snap at you." I whispered to her as she opened the car door to head outside.

"I understand that Rose but what you're doing is wrong. Eventually, you should tell Dal. He deserves to know regardless of what choice you decide to make. I'll support you whatever decision you make but right now you're not really being reasonable so bye Rose. Pick me up at the same time savvy." she slammed the door and walked to the doorway where Dal opened the door. I hadn't seen or spoke to him after that day we conceded to remain friends. I knew Rose was correct but I couldn't handle it. I saw Dal waved at me a little as he smoked a weed. I anxiously waved back before driving off. If I can't even look at him or wave at him there's no way I could tell him. As I drove home I had at last reached the decision I wanted most which I know would be very rough but it was the acceptable choice for me and others.

Hazel's POV

I walked into the house to see the gang amused to see me. I was happy to see them but after the entire discussion with my sister Rose I was worried. I was still appalled that she was pregnant it was something that was absolutely shocking and life-changing to say the least. Typically Rose was the cautious one and her being so reckless that night with Dal was startling. I knew it wasn't just her fault seeing that Dal had done the same but it was uncommon for Rose being so rebellious since she was a soc' with a greatly known rep and cared for it a lot.

"Hey, Hazel are you okay?" Johnny asked as I sat next to him on the couch as the gang all lounged around and watched some movie playing on the television. I hadn't been my normal self since I was too involved worrying about Rose and remarkably Johnny had seen this.

"I don't think I should say. It really isn't my place to do so." I was trembling contemplating my sister's pregnancy. I don't want to spill her secret but I was scared for her. Johnny draped his arms around me helping me chill down a bit.

"Come on Hazel. We can talk about it in private." he shyly suggested I nodded my head before he grabbed my hand and pulled me to Ponyboy and Soda's room. On our way there the gang started cheering us on thinking we were going inside the room for other purposes. That made me giggle a little causing Johnny to smile seeing me fairly better.

"So what is it?" He asked which made me become apprehensive once again. I didn't want to make her feel as she couldn't trust me but I'd chose to go on and say it.

"Rose is... Pregnant." his eyes widened hearing me announce this.

"By who? Was it Randy's b- because we can tell the gang to jump him. Is it Soda's you did say they would make a great couple." he kept rambling on which slightly aggravated me.

"No, Johnny! It's Dally's!" I shouted hoping the others didn't hear which I disputed since the television's volume was turned up high. Johnny was surprised hearing me say this which was my reaction too when Rose had confessed this. Nobody would think they would ever do such a thing with one another.

"I- I got to tell Dal! He has to know about this Hazel." he was about to walk out back to the living room but I rapidly pulled his shoulder.

"No, you can't Johnny! Please we can't I already told you and I don't know. She's thinking about an abortion which I'm very afraid about. I don't want the procedure going bad and her ending up hurt or worse even... dead." he looked guilty and apologized and hugged promising he wouldn't tell Dal.

"But please Hazel I think it's decent if we tell Darry. Hear me out he's the oldest and might know-how to persuade Rose to think more about her decision." I hesitated thinking about  Johnny's advice. He lit up a cigarette and handed me one which I accepted. Johnny and I have been smoking together when we were stressed and right now we unquestionably were.

"Alright but again you have to assure that you won't say anything to anybody else especially  Dal." he agreed with my terms and we hurried and knocked on Darry's door. He opened the door looking perplexed on why we were knocking on his door instead of watching the movie with the others.

"Can we please talk to you about something?"  Johnny asked which made Darry look even more confused but he nodded his head and let us in. We sat down on the bed as he stood to wait for us to say what we wanted to say.

"Rose is pregnant by Dally." Johnny spit out automatically. I glanced over at him and he whispered "what?". I didn't want this conversation to begin like this but it had so I peeked over at Darry who was astonished and was pacing around his room.

"Are you sure?" he responded I nodded my head and he sighed. I knew he cared very much for both Dal and Rose and this was very shocking for him.

"She was puking so I told her to go get checked out and we found out she's about a month into her pregnancy. And Rose would never lie about Dal being the father she would never." I revealed him which again made him nod his head slowly.

"Well, what is she going to do with the baby?" he inquired which made me swallow the large gulp in my throat. Johnny must have known that I was anxious and placed his hand on top of mine comforting me.

"I think she's having an abortion. I really want to encourage her to give it up for adoption or possibly even keep it so please Darry call her and try and convince her anything to help her." I cried out as my tears fell out. I wanted my sister to stay safe and not hurt by the procedure or to get in trouble. I knew she was going through a difficult time but I wanted to help her.

"I promise I will Hazel. I'll figure something out." Johnny and Darry both hugged me which helped me calm down. I truly hope this will convince her because if he doesn't then I don't know what will.