chapter nine:

opening up

~💚~

the spot billie had mentioned was a small, tucked-away vegan diner on the outskirts of town. it was quiet, unassuming, and best of all—free from prying eyes. the kind of place where nobody cared who you were, where the only thing that mattered was what you ordered off the menu.

madigan sat across from billie in a booth by the window, absentmindedly playing with the rim of her glass of water. she could feel the lingering tension between them, the unspoken weight of everything that had happened at the lake hanging in the air. it wasn't uncomfortable, exactly, but it was charged, like the moment between a match being struck and the fire igniting.

billie was relaxed, though, leaning back in her seat with a faint smile tugging at her lips as she watched madigan. there was something about the way madigan looked when she didn't realize she was being watched—so unguarded, so unaware of just how effortlessly magnetic she was. billie's gaze trailed over her, from the way her hair fell messily over her shoulders to the way her fingers fidgeted with her glass. she was cute without even trying, and that made her even harder to look away from.

"you keep playing with that glass like it owes you money," billie teased, her grin widening as she leaned forward slightly, resting her elbows on the table.

madigan looked up, startled out of her thoughts. she rolled her eyes, but there was a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "shut up. i'm just thinking."

"thinking about what?" billie asked, her tone playful but curious.

madigan hesitated for a moment, glancing out the window before meeting billie's gaze again. "just... everything, i guess. this whole thing. hanging out with you. it's been... weird."

billie raised an eyebrow, still smiling. "weird how?"

madigan sighed, running a hand through her hair as she leaned back in her seat. "weird because... i'm not used to this. any of it. i've always kind of kept to myself, you know? i don't really do the whole 'friendship' thing very well. let alone with someone like you."

billie's smile softened, a flicker of understanding crossing her face. "someone like me?"

"you know what i mean," madigan muttered, looking a little sheepish. "you're *billie eilish*. the whole world knows you, and i'm just... me. it's fucking strange to be hanging out with someone like you and getting dragged into all this attention. i've never been that person. i've always been more of a 'stay in the background' kind of girl."

billie tilted her head, watching her carefully. she could tell madigan was opening up, revealing parts of herself she wasn't used to sharing. and as much as billie wanted to keep the mood light, she knew this was important.

"i get that," billie said softly, her voice losing some of its playful edge. "i know it's a lot. i didn't mean to drag you into all this shit. i mean, i know it comes with being around me, but... i guess i didn't think about how much it would affect you."

madigan shook her head quickly. "it's not your fault, billie. i just... i don't know how to handle it. i've always been the kind of person who flies under the radar. i like being invisible. it's easier that way."

billie frowned, leaning forward again, her gaze more intense now. "why would you wanna be invisible? you're fucking amazing, madigan. you're smart, you're funny, and you've got this whole 'i don't give a fuck' vibe that's kind of... hot, honestly."

madigan's cheeks flushed at that, and she quickly looked away, biting her lip to suppress a smile. "jesus, billie," she muttered, though there was no real annoyance in her tone.

billie smirked, enjoying the way madigan reacted to her flirting. she couldn't help it. there was something about madigan that made her want to push those boundaries, to see how far she could go before madigan snapped back. but there was also something deeper—something that made her want to know more, to dig beneath the surface and see what made madigan tick.

"i'm serious, though," billie continued, her tone softening again. "i get it. i mean, i *used* to be kind of invisible, too. before everything blew up. i kept to myself, didn't really let people in. then all this shit happened, and suddenly, i was the center of the fucking world. and it's exhausting. half the time, i don't even know who i am anymore because everyone's got an opinion about who i should be."

madigan looked at her, surprised by the vulnerability in billie's voice. she hadn't expected that. billie always seemed so confident, so sure of herself. but hearing her talk about the weight of fame, the pressure, made her realize how much billie was carrying.

"i don't know how you do it," madigan admitted quietly. "it's like... everyone wants a piece of you. how do you even find space to just be yourself?"

billie let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. "honestly? sometimes i don't. sometimes it feels like there's no 'me' left. it's just this version of me that everyone else created. the 'billie eilish' everyone expects, you know? the music, the image, the fucking expectations—it's a lot. and sometimes i wanna just... disappear."

madigan's heart clenched at that. she hadn't expected billie to open up like this, to reveal how much of a toll fame was taking on her. it made her see billie in a different light—not just as this larger-than-life figure, but as a person who was struggling, just like everyone else.

"that's fucked up," madigan said softly, her voice filled with a mixture of sympathy and frustration. "you should be able to just... live. without all that noise."

billie smiled sadly, her eyes flicking down to her plate before meeting madigan's gaze again. "yeah, well, that's not how it works. not for me, anyway."

madigan was quiet for a moment, taking in everything billie had said. she didn't know what to say, didn't know how to fix it, but she felt a surge of protectiveness rise up in her. she didn't want billie to feel like this. she didn't want her to feel trapped by the world's expectations.

billie noticed the shift in madigan's expression, the way her brow furrowed slightly, the concern in her eyes. it made something in billie's chest tighten, a strange warmth spreading through her. she reached across the table, her fingers brushing lightly against madigan's hand.

"you know, i like hanging out with you because you don't treat me like that," billie said quietly. "you don't see me as this... thing. you see me as a person. and that's rare."

madigan's breath caught for a moment at the feel of billie's fingers against hers. it was such a simple gesture, but it sent a jolt through her, like her skin was suddenly hyper-aware of every point of contact. she looked up, meeting billie's gaze, and for a moment, the world around them seemed to fade away.

"i don't really give a shit about the 'famous' part," madigan said, her voice steady but laced with something deeper. "i care about the person sitting in front of me. the real you."

billie's heart skipped at that, her eyes searching madigan's face. she could feel the tension between them growing again, the pull that had been there from the start, but it felt different now. stronger. more real.

"i'm glad," billie whispered, her thumb tracing a small circle on the back of madigan's hand. "because the real me is pretty fucking into you."

madigan's breath hitched, her pulse quickening at billie's words. there was no mistaking the intensity in billie's gaze, the way her eyes darkened with something more than just casual attraction. it was raw, real, and madigan felt it too—this undeniable connection that was growing between them, pulling them closer with every passing second.

madigan swallowed hard, trying to keep her voice steady. "yeah?"

billie grinned, her eyes sparkling with mischief as she leaned in slightly, her voice dropping to a low, almost teasing tone. "yeah. you didn't notice?"

madigan's lips twitched into a small smile, her heart pounding in her chest. "maybe i noticed a little."

billie's grin widened, but there was something softer in her eyes now, something more vulnerable. "good. 'cause i'm not exactly subtle."

madigan laughed softly, her tension easing slightly as she looked at billie, really looked at her. she wasn't just some celebrity. she was someone who was real, flawed, and navigating life just like anyone else. and in that moment, madigan realized that maybe they weren't so different after all.

they finished their meal in comfortable silence, the unspoken connection between them lingering in the air, palpable but unpressured. when they finally left the diner and headed back to the car, madigan couldn't shake the feeling that something had shifted between them. something real.

and as billie pulled out onto the road, the sun setting behind them, madigan couldn't help but glance over at her, her heart fluttering in a way she hadn't expected.

she didn't know what was happening between them, but whatever it was, it was pulling her in, deeper and deeper, and she was ready to see where it led.