𝐉𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐲 𝐀𝐭 𝐈𝐭𝐬 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭

❣︎

𝚌 𝚑 𝚊 𝚙 𝚝 𝚎 𝚛 𝚝 𝚠 𝚎 𝚗 𝚝 𝚢 𝚏 𝚒 𝚟 𝚎

𓁹ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒𓁹

It's Sakusa, you thought and hid behind a mannequin.

You were about to buy new clothes after completely settling in your apartment and also your life here in Tokyo. It was Saturday and you've had a pretty tough week of adjusting to everything. But after being inside the shop for no more than 10 minutes, you caught a glimpse of a black haired person with a huge and tall build. A mask was covering half of his face and he's wearing a hoodie.

That man was someone you knew all too well.

It's been nearly 3 weeks since you have stepped foot in Tokyo. And around that time was when you decided to not chase Sakusa back.

So seeing him here came as a huge shock. You expected to run into him later but not this soon. You weren't prepared. Avoiding wasn't what you planned to do when you see him but this was just too soon and too sudden that your response was too hide.

Luckily, by the mannequin was an array of clothes and you moved to the side, out of the shadows of the mannequin and acted as if you were shopping for clothes.

You were and you will but not right now since you're still on high alert.

Just a glance. You wanted just one quick glance. It wouldn't hurt, right?

It did.

He was there, right before your eyes. But you can't even take a step forward.

You sighed, you expected you'll be feeling numb, but at the same time, stings all over if you ever see him. He was your first in almost everything. You loved him.

Running and hugging him came up in your mind, but that sounds silly since what you had had long ended.

You have a jacket on but it suddenly grew colder and you found yourself hugging yourself.

Nights were spent crying after you decided not to want to see him again. Every five of your being refused to let him go. But even if you do see him like how you were now, what would you even do?

You don't know how much but you knew you had an effect on him. He has a stable life now, wouldn't you just disrupt it if you appear?

A week passed after that and today was once again, Saturday.

Sugawara Koushi will be visiting today. He said he wanted to explore Tokyo and use you as a guide. He was now a teacher and you weren't really surprised with his decision.

He said he'd come at around noon and you waited patiently for your older cousin to arrive. You sat on your couch and waited while watching some random show.

The doorbell finally tung and you stood as quickly as you could.

But when you opened the door, it wasn't your light gray haired cousin. It was a wavy haired man that was taller than Koushi.

"Kiyoomi," you whispered.

His mask covered half of his face, as usual, but his eyes were just as intense as ever. He looked like he wanted to ask questions but he was too confused as to how to start.

A memory of Komori telling you that he questions a first year that he barely knew repeatedly on that training camp surfaced in your mind. If Kiyoomi wanted to know something, he will. Remembering this, you readied yourself for what comes after.

Silence. Silence was what came after you calling him.

He grew taller, not by much but you noticed it. His hair was a bit shorter than before and he were more intimidating now, especially with his large build.

"Sakura," you faintly hear him say. It sounded like he wasn't even planning on actually saying it.

The hoodie he wore was black and his hands were slid inside its pockets.

"Sakura!" A more cheery voice interrupted.

Koushi was standing next to him and he looked quite nervous. You wanted to know what happened and you were about to ask before he smiled and said, "Why don't we go inside first?"

You wanted answers but it wouldn't be appropriate for you all to stand out in the hallway.

You cleared your throat and sighed.

"Please, come inside."

They did but Sakusa stood in the middle of the living room and Koushi ran off.

"You can sit anywhere you like," you offered.

He pulled his mask down, "I won't. Who knows who's been sitting here? You may have even acquired some habits that I would prefer to stay away from."

It was the first time you heard him talk that long in years. You love his voice and you mentioned it to him so many times before.

Hearing it again sent shivers down your spine.

"I'd like to think I didn't." Your voice was calm, as if you weren't shaken up. His rude comments doesn't affect you anyway.

He didn't reply and just stared at you. You stared back. It was so tense and awkward.

"How's Komori?" You looked away from his and stared at a random thing in the apartment.

He scoffed, "You're asking about another man when you haven't even asked me how I am?"

Your eyes grew wide and you quickly asked, "How are you then?"

"Good," he replied.

You wanted to yell at him.

You didn't have to because Koushi stormed in and yelled, "Watching you two is painful!"

"Kou-kun, were you eavesdropping!?"

"Was there anything to eavesdrop on?" he retorted back.

That silenced you.

"You two must have a lot to say to each other but you wouldn't know anything if you'll just stand and stare and then look away at each other!"

Oh, he had a tough week at school, you remembered.

"Kou-kun, okay, calm down."

He grunted and walked away.

You were about to run off to him but he stopped you with a question.

"How are you?"

You turned back to him and you calmed down. You smiled and replied, "I'm fine."

Unlike him, you were not passive aggressive.

Your smile actually calmed him down too. It didn't look like it but he was nervous. What will happen if you two meet were just full of possibilities that it just made more nervous.

"The cleaning habits you taught me are still how I clean things, you can trust me."

He sighed and looked down on the couch. He stared at it for a couple of short moments before sitting down. You sat down in front of him shortly after.

"You won weeks ago, didn't you? Congratulations!"

"Thanks, how'd you know?"

"Oh, it was playing in the cafe I was at. You have more fans now, you know?"

He just went silent after that.

"How long have you been here?" he asked after debating if he will.

"A month."

He closed his eyes after your answer. It was an act of calming himself down. You have been here a month. He could have been with you for a month already. He felt regret.

"How did you find me?" you asked and eagerly waited for an answer.

"I went to Miyagi."

Your mouth slightly opened and you raised you hands slowly to cover it, an act of someone who was really surprised. How can he go to Miyagi to find you?

"Were you looking for me?"

"Of course, Sakura, what else did you think I was going to do there? Your cousin helped me."

You mouth closed and your hands dropped down to your lap. You clutched your shirt and your toes curled as you stopped yourself from crying.

It finally completely dawned on you. He was here. He was looking for you. The man you desperately longed for in years is now here. And it looked like he also longed for you. You finally let out the emotions you didn't even know you were holding back and you cried.

Kiyoomi leaned back and covered his face. This was too much. He felt overwhelmed. You were right in front of him but there were a lot of invisible barriers that's keeping him away.

You can't imagine how he must have felt to learn that you were now here, where he was all the time.

"Sakura," he called and looked down, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.""