"Huh? Oh..." You flinched a bit, quickly putting together a smile. "Maybe I'm imagining it. I just thought you looked a bit upset all of a sudden..."

"Yeah. You're imagining it."

He turned away from you without another word, listlessly clicking through the tabs open on his computer. The atmosphere was undeniably tense. Normally, you didn't have any problems making conversation with him, but now it was almost like you'd completely forgotten how to speak.

What was the problem? Did Ryu coming over here really make him that uncomfortable? You could sort of understand why that might be the case, but still... it seemed a bit unfair to blame you for it.

With your spirits now abysmally low, you turned back to your own desk and tried to focus on finishing up your work. Yuki didn't speak to you for the rest of your shift.

...

What a shitty day.

Yuki slammed the door to his apartment shut, all but kicking his shoes against the wall. What had started off promising had quickly gone downhill. No matter how hard he tried to keep from replaying the events of earlier in his mind, they just wouldn't go away. It left a bad taste in his mouth. Made him feel as if there was some uncomfortable, foreign object lodged in his throat.

He threw off his jacket and instinctively made for the collection of pills scattered across one of the side tables. He popped several of them at once, didn't even wait to fill up a glass with water. They didn't go down as easily as he would've liked, but somehow it was still less unpleasant than how he'd felt all throughout the latter portion of the day.

Weary, he fell to the couch and waited for the light, fluttery sensation to kick in. He craved that feeling of total disconnect from his body. All the pain and frustration that just kept eating away at him.

But he should've known better than to drug himself out when he wasn't in his right mind. The high that followed was tumultuous and unstable. Instead of lifting him off the ground, he felt like he was being sucked right down into the floor. He was spiraling, a victim of his own cowardice and dark, twisted thoughts.

His breathing started to get frantic, uneven. The memories from earlier, of Ryu holding you close and kissing you without abandon kept coming back even more frequently than before. It was as if the two of you were right there in the room with him, flirting shamelessly all the while laughing at his expense.

"Stop... stop it," he rasped, clawing hopelessly at the air. "I don't want to see it anymore. I-I said I don't want to see it anymore...!"

But the images just wouldn't disappear. Even when he closed his eyes, you were still there with a lustful, inviting expression on your face, outright relishing the sensation of Ryu's lips tracing over your cheeks. Yuki watched in horror as Ryu snaked both his arms around the front of your waist and began unbuttoning your shirt. His lips ventured away from your face, now opting to trail all the way down your bare shoulders, tongue swiping across the exposed skin.

Nauseous beyond belief, Yuki staggered to the bathroom and spewed the contents of his stomach out into the toilet bowl. He kept hearing your voice in his ears, over and over again. You were now giggling as Ryu ran his hands over every inch of your body. Your clothes dropped to the ground and you wantonly kissed along his jaw, eyes heavy with lust.

"I want you, Ryu."

Yuki keeled forward again, but he had nothing left to throw up. Instead, he cried out, tears slipping down his cheeks and mixing with all the waste that he'd purged.

"Not again," he sobbed. "Why is this happening again?"

His head was pounding relentlessly, and for a while, all he could do was lay on the cold, tiled floor of the bathroom, sniffling and whimpering like a pitiful fool. This wasn't working. It wasn't enough to make him forget. He needed to forget.

Eventually, some of the strength seeped back into his limbs, and he managed to make his way back over to the living room.

He fumbled with his phone and dialed one of the numbers, waiting for the tell-tale click on the other end.

A muffled voice picked up before long. "Hello?"

"I need stronger drugs," Yuki gritted out. "The ones you gave me aren't working anymore."