the first thing i notice when i wake up is the warmth.

it's everywhere—wrapped around my waist, pressing against my back, tangled between my fingers. it's slow and steady, the kind that makes you want to sink deeper into sleep, let the world outside stay frozen while you stay here, tucked away in something safe.

and then i remember why i feel so warm.

ellie.

my breath catches as my mind fully wakes up, the weight of her arm draped across my waist suddenly so much more real. she's curled up against me, forehead resting against the back of my shoulder, her body slack with sleep. i can feel the soft rise and fall of her breathing, the way she instinctively tightens her hold on me even in unconsciousness, like some part of her knows i'm here and doesn't want to let go.

and fuck—this is real.

the realization hits me all at once, spreading through my chest like the first sip of something warm on a cold morning. ellie is my girlfriend. last night wasn't some dream.

the thought alone makes me grin like an idiot.

i don't move right away. i should—I should get up before someone (joel) barges in and finds us tangled together like this but i don't want to. not yet. instead, i let myself sink into it, just for a second longer. i let myself memorize the way she feels against me, how soft she is when she's asleep, how peaceful she looks when she isn't glaring or smirking or rolling her eyes at me.

and then, because i'm weak, i reach down and brush my fingers against hers, lightly tracing the scarred knuckles resting against my stomach.

ellie stirs.

i freeze.

she lets out a low, sleepy groan, her nose scrunching up against my shoulder as she shifts. for a split second, i think she's going to roll away and wake up properly, but instead, she just sighs and buries her face against me like she's trying to escape the sunlight creeping in through the window.

then, muffled against my back, she grumbles, "s'too early."

i bite my lip to keep from laughing.

she's so fucking cute.

"you don't even know what time it is." my voice is quiet, careful not to break the stillness.

ellie groans again, a lazy, almost content sound. "don't care. 'm comfortable."

my heart does something weird in my chest. i feel her shift again, and then—oh.

oh.

she nuzzles closer.

i go completely still.

my brain, once again, short circuits.

this is dangerous. my face is already burning, and if i don't get up now, i'll probably melt into the mattress and never recover.

but before i can force myself to move, ellie lets out another sleepy sigh and mutters, "merry fucking christmas to me."

and i—i lose it.

a laugh bubbles out of me before i can stop it, shaking us both. ellie finally cracks an eye open, blinking blearily at me like she can't figure out why i'm laughing, her face still half buried against my shoulder.

"what?" her voice is hoarse with sleep.

i shake my head, still grinning. "nothing. you're just—" adorable? unfairly cute? dangerously attractive even when you're barely awake? "—ridiculous."

ellie huffs, squeezing me once before finally rolling onto her back. she scrubs a hand over her face and lets out a huge yawn, her shirt riding up slightly as she stretches. i force myself to look away before my brain can betray me again.

when i glance back, ellie is watching me, eyes still heavy with sleep but holding something softer underneath. something quiet. something that makes my stomach flip.

"morning," she murmurs, voice lower than usual.

"morning," i say back, barely above a whisper.

for a moment, neither of us move.

and then—

a loud bang echoes from downstairs, followed by a familiar voice shouting: "ellie, leilani! get up, we're eatin' breakfast before it gets cold!"

joel.

ellie groans in agony, throwing her arm over her face. "fucking hell."

i laugh, slipping out of bed before he can come up and drag us out himself. we are so bad at keeping secrets.

the smell of coffee and eggs fills the house, warm and familiar. joel is already at the table, sipping his coffee like he didn't just yell up the stairs, a plate of food in front of him. he glances up when we step into the kitchen, eyes flicking between us.

and then—he squints.

i freeze.

ellie does too, stiffening beside me like a guilty child caught sneaking candy.

joel raises a brow. "'bout time you two got up."

ellie clears her throat. "yeah. uh. we were—sleeping."

wow. great start.

joel doesn't say anything at first, just looks between us again, his eyes narrowing slightly. then he nods toward the table. "sit."

we do. probably too fast. probably too awkwardly. but joel doesn't comment on it—he just takes another slow sip of his coffee like he's thinking.

ellie shovels food into her mouth aggressively, like if she eats fast enough, she can escape this situation. i take a more reasonable approach, but i can still feel the way joel's gaze lingers, like he's watching us.

and then, casually—too casually—he says, "so. you two gettin' along better these days?"

ellie chokes.

actually chokes.

she grabs her coffee and swallows it down, coughing into her fist. i don't dare look at her. if i do, i'll probably lose it.

joel, for his part, looks amused.

"what?" ellie finally manages, voice strained.

joel shrugs. "just sayin'. seems like things are... different. used to be at each other's throats. now you're sleepin' in all cozy."

ellie glares at him. "we weren't—" she stops, catching herself, then scowls down at her plate. "whatever."

joel hums, clearly enjoying himself. "uh-huh."

i finally find my voice, ignoring the warmth creeping up my neck. "we just... worked things out."

joel looks at me then, like he's trying to read me. like he already knows.

and honestly? he probably does.

but thankfully, he lets it drop, shaking his head with a small chuckle. "mmhm. sure. eat your food."

the rest of breakfast is relatively normal, but i know joel is onto us. ellie and i exchange subtle glances, silently agreeing to be more careful.

we are so fucked.

as breakfast continues, i can feel the tension slowly settling into something more normal—well, as normal as it gets when you're trying to pretend nothing is different when everything is. ellie stops aggressively inhaling her food and slows down, probably realizing joel isn't gonna interrogate us right now. joel mostly just smirks to himself between bites, clearly entertained by how bad we are at acting casual.

and then, just when i think we've made it through the conversation unscathed, joel wipes his mouth with a napkin and says, "you two are on patrol today."

ellie and i both glance at each other, then back at him.

"together?" ellie asks, like maybe she misheard.

joel nods. "yep. and i'm comin' with."

ellie groans immediately. "why?"

joel gives her a look like she should already know. "why d'you think?" he deadpans.

ellie leans back in her chair, crossing her arms. "you don't even like patrol."

"and you don't usually sleep in, but here we are." joel takes a slow sip of his coffee.

ellie sputters. i swear i can see actual steam coming out of her ears. i don't even try to fight the smile threatening to creep onto my face.

joel just sighs, standing up and stretching. "get ready. we leave in ten."

ellie groans again, slumping dramatically against the table as he walks away. when i nudge her foot under the table, she glares at me.

"don't."

"i didn't say anything."

"you were thinking it."

"what was i thinking?"

ellie squints at me like she knows exactly what i'm doing, but then she shakes her head, muttering, "stupid fuckin' breakfast," under her breath.

i laugh, finishing the last of my coffee before getting up. "come on, girlfriend," i tease, emphasizing the last word just to mess with her.

ellie groans again, dropping her head onto the table. "you're so annoying."

"you love it."

she grumbles something incoherent, but i'm pretty sure i hear a mumbled "yeah, yeah" before i head upstairs to get ready.

the crisp morning air bites at my cheeks as sage's hooves crunch softly against the snow. the world outside jackson is quiet—eerily so. the only sounds are the distant caws of crows, the occasional rustling of the wind, and the rhythmic clopping of our horses' hooves against the frozen ground. joel rides ahead, his posture straight, eyes scanning the horizon like a man who's seen too much to ever relax. ellie and i? we're trailing behind, just far enough to be out of earshot.

or at least, we think we are.

"if you fall off your horse one more time, i'm leaving you here," ellie teases under her breath, her lips twitching.

i roll my eyes. "it was one time. sage got spooked."

ellie smirks, adjusting her grip on shimmer's reins. "sure, princess. keep tellin' yourself that."

i shoot her a glare, but it's half-hearted. truthfully, it's been nice. easy, even. ever since last night, we've been... different. we still bicker, but there's something softer beneath it now. ellie will nudge my knee with hers as we ride side by side, and i'll pretend not to notice the way her fingers brush mine when she gestures while she talks. it's something.

joel, however, is less amused.

"you two gonna keep flirtin', or you actually gonna do your damn job?" he calls over his shoulder.

ellie almost chokes. "jesus, joel."

i feel my face heat up, but i refuse to give joel the satisfaction of seeing me flustered. i straighten in my saddle and clear my throat. "we're paying attention."

joel doesn't seem convinced. "mmhm. just keep your eyes open. don't need you two gettin' distracted."

ellie shoots me a look, one that practically screams can you believe this guy? but i barely acknowledge it.

because the thing is—i am paying attention. i have been, ever since i got back on this route. ever since we came near where we found those tracks.

tommy swore they hadn't seen anything else since that day. he told me i was probably being paranoid.

but the unease hasn't left.

there's something about the way the air feels out here. like the trees are holding their breath. like something is watching from beyond the treeline.

ellie nudges my arm. "you good?"

i blink, forcing myself to focus. she's frowning now, actually concerned.

"yeah," i say, but i don't quite believe it myself. "just... keeping my eyes open."

ellie doesn't push, but she doesn't look convinced either. joel, still ahead, doesn't say anything. but i know him well enough to know he's watching.

we ride in silence for a while, the only sound the steady rhythm of our horses' steps against the frost covered earth. jackson is far behind us now. out here, we're alone.

joel slows shimmer to a stop near a clearing, turning in his saddle. "we'll break here for a bit," he says, voice even but firm. "let the horses rest."

ellie and i exchange a glance but don't argue. we pull up beside him, dismounting. i run a hand down sage's neck, whispering quiet reassurances as she huffs out a breath, her ears twitching. ellie does the same with shimmer, though she's less gentle about it, giving the mare a solid pat on the shoulder before stepping closer to me.

"you sure you're okay?" she murmurs, low enough so joel won't hear.

i hesitate. i don't want to sound paranoid. but i also can't shake the tension gripping my spine.

before i can answer, joel suddenly stiffens.

his hand goes to the rifle strapped across his back, his body shifting just slightly—just enough to make my stomach drop. ellie notices too, immediately stepping closer to me, her fingers twitching near her own gun.

i follow joel's gaze.

at first, i don't see anything.

just trees, branches heavy with snow, the early morning light barely filtering through the overcast sky. nothing moves. no birds scatter. no signs of life, no clear threat.

but i swear—i swear—i see the faintest imprint in the snow just beyond the clearing.

not from an animal.

not from a horse.

a footprint.

a boot.

ellie sees it too. i feel her tense beside me, muscles coiled, ready.

joel shifts in his saddle, his voice eerily calm. too calm.

"we're not alone."

ellie doesn't hesitate. she steps in front of me, just slightly, just enough to make it clear—she's ready to fight.

but there's nothing to fight. nothing moves. the trees remain still. the wind barely stirs.

but that feeling—that suffocating feeling of being watched—

it lingers.

ellie glances at me. i know that look. she's thinking the same thing i am.

the tracks. the ones from the other day.

someone's been out here.

and they never left.

joel exhales slowly, then swings his rifle off his shoulder.

"mount up," he orders, voice low. "we're headin' back."

ellie hesitates. "shouldn't we—"

joel shoots her a sharp look. "back. now."

ellie swallows whatever argument she was about to make. she nods.

i don't move right away. my eyes stay fixed on the trees, on the untouched snow, on that single footprint just barely visible in the frost.

whoever was out here...

they're still watching.

i can feel it.

ellie reaches for my hand, squeezing it briefly before nudging me toward sage.

"come on, lei," she says, too quiet, too tense. "we're leaving."

i let her pull me away.

but as we ride back toward jackson, the unease never leaves me.

because i know this isn't over.