I was so cold, even as the demon wrapped his soft arms around my shoulders and brought me in for a kind hug, one I, at first, attempted to pull away from, but when his grip never once faltered, I slowly gave in, my lips releasing a small sigh as the pale haired demon stroked through my locks as if I were a small porcelain doll, do delicate, so smooth.

Rui was his name. He was the one who would constantly drop by, only ever watching me suffer infinite pain before disappearing into thin air, not even leaving a hair off his head to go on. It was only until a few days ago that I recovered faster than I ever had and managed to catch up with the demon, all before I demanded his name, to which he gave without compliance. 

And now, that takes us to this moment, his cold arms wrapped around my frame as he lay his forehead against the top of my skull, his eyes closed, while mine wide open. It all started when he asked about how I got here, a half demon wasn't something you saw everyday, after all. And I simply replied with the fact I was taken here with my family, who got separated from me as soon as we got here, the full truth, but leaving the full details out. It was simple, it didn't need anymore. There was no point.

However, to the demon, there was. He took me in his arms without hesitance, stroking through my hair, not even wanting my arms to circle around him. He just wanted me to feel some sort of warmth, even though his body felt so cold.

"I've always wanted a family." He began, speaking into my hair as my eyes held a small glare. I had almost no link to this thing we call comfort for years on end, I had practically forgotten everything about what it even meant, and so, for this demon, who I only met a few days ago, to wrap me in an embrace and hold me, just as my mother did, I didn't know how to truly feel. 

I shook my head, holding in a scoff. "And?" I questioned, my voice harsh as he lowered us to the ground and held my head on his shoulder. I didn't trust this demon, to say the least, I needed to know more about him, I needed to understand him better before I could fully understand his motives. I wasn't simply going to give in to his empathy, that would show weakness. 

I can't be weak. Not anymore. 

He sighed, his pale fingers toying through a single lock before letting it slip from his grasp. "And so, I know how it feels to desire such emotions many share with them. To not understand the strange love of an older sibling, to not hold your younger sibling in your arms as they cry, to not feel the comfort of your mother or father, I do sympathise with you." My teeth grit in anger, my brows furrowing in dissatisfaction.

Did he think I was weak? Did he truly believe I needed the comfort of another, no less a family member, who may as well all be dead by now, did he really think I was so weak minded as to believe his sputtered lies and deceitful words? How dare he. I'm not weak.

I shook my head, pushing against his chest to free myself from his grasp, though his arms never left my shoulders. "How dare you lump me in with vermin such as you. I am not weak, like you think I am. It's ruinous to believe I am to begin with. Who do you think you're talking-" 

All the demon did was shake his head, silencing me with a finger to my lips. "I do not believe that at all. There is a reason you were chosen by that man, and so I do not doubt you. I just wish to empathise with you, to help you understand we could be one in the same." His voice was calm, completely unthreatened by my sudden outburst, nor the slitted pupils, which had remained the same throughout my time here.

My lips parted, my eyes widening in, what I could only assume was, annoyance and disgrace. "How dare you think we are the same. We couldn't be less alike." I scoffed, pushing myself away from him before I stood to my feet, my eyes reflecting the dim and warm light of the fortress around me. "Go away, before I kill you." I turned my head over my shoulder, scowling at the boy behind me, while all he did was watch.

He sighed, standing to his feet, bowing his body, and disappearing into thin air, just as he always did. I never fully understood that demon, and I probably never would, no matter how hard I tried, but no matter how much I denied it it my head at the time, his hug was warm. It lite something inside of me which I didn't think would ever be lit again, and yet he did it with a simple action.

I hated it. I hated feeling emotions, especially good ones, it only brings me closer to that man. You see, it was only a few months ago, did akaza finally announce a fact to me, I should've known from the start. Muzan can read all demons mind, even the upper moon one, but since I am only half demon, he is limited to understanding me, however, there is one thing that he can read- or feel- that can help him grasp my thoughts. My feelings.

Muzan, when chosen to, could feel everything I am experiencing in that moment in time. Sadness. Anger. Fear. Happiness. Love. Anything. He could feel it whenever he wanted. And I didn't like that. Not at all.

He had leverage over me now. He could understand me to a T if I felt any solid emotion worth paying attention to. He was close to me, and I wanted to get as far away from him as possible. It was in a split second decision I decided that I would no longer feel anything good, that when he felt me, he would only feel anger. The most purest of rage anyone could ever feel. 

I grew angrier over the weeks, slowly becoming worse and worse on purpose until he refused to want to feel what I was feeling at any moment. I wanted him to feel the same rage that I held after my mother's passing, after he took me here, separated me from what was left of my family, caused me more pain than ever imaginable. 

I wanted to feel all of it. 

Every. 

Last. 

Drop.

"Oi." A voice spoke out, allowing me to snap my head towards the sound, to where my pupils came in contact with ones of a yellow hue. "Who were you talking to just now?" Akaza inquired, his body perched on a ledge a few metres above me, but high enough so that he had to choir until I could clearly hear his words. 

My eyes narrowed, almost morphing my features into a scowl. "Just a lower moon. Thinks he could relate to me. Damned idiot." I didn't want to say those words, truly, I thought it was sweet, that he was truly trying to help in some way, but my urge for revenge was too great, and I was soon reminded of the pure suffocating feeling I felt as I watched my mother's blood slither around the dirtied ground, which was once pure in colour. 

I was soon reminded I had nothing left, and this was the only way of satisfying myself with the thirst of revenge.

He hummed, closing his eyes before he appeared right in front of me, his back facing my sights as he kept his gaze forward. "You need to get back to training. Remember what I told you what that man wants?" Ah yes, what Muzan told his upper moons of what he expected of us in four years time. He wanted each of us half demons to be able to have the strength comparable to an upper moon, if not, a powerful lower moon.

He wanted each of us to act as a bodyguard of sorts, to make sure we followed each and every one of his commands without complaint, and to ensure we did it with utmost respect, to which he was convinced he deserved. How delusional.

But back to the point, if we didn't meet up to those standards, he wouldn't kill us, no. But he would imprison us, torture us, come close to killing us, but leaving us to rot alive, until we agreed, and if we still didn't, he would just do the same to us for the next hundred years. For we are also cursed with an unnatural life span. 

I shook my head, closing my eyes and releasing a small sigh, letting my facade slip for a moment before it returned almost immediately. "I guess you're right." I scoffed, running a hand through my hair before walking to the edge of the platform.

With a single step, I feel through the darkness, allowing the darkness to consume me.

༶•┈┈⛧┈♛ ♛┈⛧┈┈•༶

"You called, master?"

It was my voice that tore through the calm silence.

Everything, but the wonderful chirps of the birds and the hums of the day, was filled with a prestigious silence that was held above everything else around us. It was so calm, so comforting to be in.

That was one of my favourite things about being here. Everything was calm. Everything was so peaceful, even the gods above would envy my finalised serenity I waited ever so long for. It was well deserved, in my opinion. I mean, it's not everyday you experience what I did over the course of years I couldn't count. I didn't even know if this was my true age.

The room was decorated with the finest walls and shoji panels to decorate the ground beneath our feet. Plants and cushions of all sorts decorated the calm room, whose doors were wide open, exposing the greatness of the gardens outside.

Soft willows draping their limbs over the pond, the bamboo stick thumping back and forth against a stone slab as streams of water slithered through it's circled green interior, the cherry blossoms that somehow seemed to bloom all throughout the year, their petals slipping through the air before gracefully sliding to the ground, the koi who made small splashes every few seconds, the red bridge that ran over the pond and reached the others side, it's colours contrasting the gardens in a way it looked as though it was perfectly placed.

It truly was a beautiful home.

"Yes, I did, didn't I?" Kagaya managed to speak out, his body facing the gardens, allowing his form to become engulfed in the kind breeze, his locks guided by the calm, refreshing, winds. He was decorated in his usual attire as he sat on his futon, Amane in the corner of the room, pouring a glass of water from a jug, which sat on a desk in the corner of the room.

I nodded, taking my staff out of its sheath before laying the spear against the wall beside the door. "May I ask what brought you to call me over?" I inquired, releasing a small sigh as I made my way towards the sitting man, inhaling the fresh breeze of the gardens, my feet thudding against the floor. I released a small huff as I lowered myself to my knees and rested my hands on my lap comfortably.

The warm light reflected into our eyes, the reflections of the pond and the trees sparking through his empty pupils and my full (e/c) eyes, our hair blowing with the gentle gust as Amane placed down the jug and held the cup of water in the palms of her hand delicately, her reflection cast into the liquid.

The man only nodded, turning his head towards my direction, a smile plastered on his features. "I called you here because I need your advice on something." He was simple, closing his blind eyes as he inhaled the fresh aroma radiated off the plants around us.

I tilted my head, blinking to turn my face towards where he sat, gazing into his dulled eyes that once held so much life. I used to stare into his eyes all the time before the curse spread. They were so calming, so utterly beautiful that it always managed to take my breath away when I looked into them. "And what would that be, if you don't mind me questioning you?"

I did pity the man. Raised from birth just to fulfil a role until his early death. A curse eating away at his body until his final breath, ensuring a life of pain and unfortune towards himself when all he does is help others. Maybe in another life he could fulfil all his dreams, see all the wonders of the world, live a long and full life filled with nothing but joy and happiness, because, honestly, that was all this man ever truly deserved.

He shook his head turning back to the wonderful gardens ahead of the both of us as Amane took her rightful place at his side, the cup still in her delicate and smooth hands. "Of Course. I don't mind." He smiled, a hint of sadness hidden behind it. It was a shame I couldn't read his eyes anymore. "I brought you here because I would like to discuss the situation of Tanjiro and Nezuko."

I blinked, my stoic features as calm as ever, even as I turned my face back to the gardens as a flock of ravens swept by the opened doors, a singular one of their feathers slipping down to land on the entrance, only a few metres away from where we all sat. It was as though Kagaya stared at the feather longingly, even though he couldn't even see its patterns and fluff. "Why do you want to hear my opinion?" I inquired, my eyes watching as the water rippled beneath a small leaf that had only just wilted from it's tree.

"Why wouldn't I wish to hear your opinion?" He inquired, Amane silent beside him. "If anything yours is the most important out of everyone else's." He explained kindly, lifting his frail hand for me to take, which I slowly and gently took.

He always did this since his sight got lost in the sand of time. It was his little way of showing he was listening, and if he could, he would be watching, too. It was reassuring, in a way. It showed he truly cared, that he understood what I was saying, and if I ever struggled to respond, he would be comforting me in a way even I couldn't describe how it worked.

"I see." I spoke, his thumb rubbing small circles on the back of my hand. "Well, if I were to say anything about them, they seem kind. Kinder than most people, even the girl. I can't guarantee we can trust them, but, that doesn't mean I won't be willing to give them a chance..." I paused, taking a breath before I spoke out once again. "Just like you did with me."

Kagaya hummed, moving to lay his other palm atop of my hand, sandwiching it with his warm touch. "I thought that would be the case." His smile widened, his eyes soft, even though they weren't fully visible to read. "In that case, I guess that means you wouldn't mind spending some more time with them, right?" He tilted his head looking up at me and into my eyes as though he could fully see once again.

I blinked, my brow raising, almost hesitant to understand what he meant by that. "May I ask what you mean?" I inquired, Amane turning to meet my eyes on the other side of the male. She simply gave me a slight smile, nodding to my form before she placed the cup beside her and turned back to watch the gardens.

He gave out a slight chuckle. Oh dear. Whenever that man chuckled, nothing good would come out of it. "Well, I was wondering if you may be able to watch over them." Before I could speak up about it, he continued. "That might mean you will be joining them on missions, but maybe you could just take care of them while they're here. Maybe try to get along and understand them better?"

I pursed my lips, my brows furrowing. "Kagaya, with all due respect, I doubt that role will be suited for me." I spoke out, my voice holding a hint of concern. "Not to mention, that would leave you unguarded-" I was interrupted as soon as the man gave my hand a comforting squeeze, his smile only widening warmly.

"I know no such person better suited for this role than you, (Y/N)." He began, taking a breath as he turned his head to look out into the gardens, not that he could look. "Not to mention, I believe it would be good for you. Amane says you haven't been getting enough rest lately." I turned to look at Amane, who only gave me a side glance and a small smile.

Damnit.

"But I-"

Without warning, the man moved our hands until my palm was held to his chest, holding it directly over his heart, to which I could feel the warm thump of his chest, his smile growing emotional, a sense of longing reflected into his features. "Do you feel that, (Y/N)?" He spoke out, leaving me to blink. "That is the beat of my heart, a heart that won't beat for much longer at this rate."

"Please don't say that-"

"I want you to keep theirs going." He interrupted, his hair falling over his features as he sighed, the rhythm of his heart growing slower, calmer. "That will be your new mission, from this point on." My lips parted. "You will continue to guard this home, you will continue to be a part of this family, but I want theirs to continue on until Muzan has been crushed. Train them. Train them as you see fit. Keep them alive." He paused, a bead of sweat running down the side of my face. "I'm asking you because you are the only one who can do it. You can relate to them like no hashira. You can understand them." He sighed, rubbing this thumb against the back of my hand as he held it to his chest. He looked into my eyes, his empty ones reflecting all of the wonderful light of the world even though it never really reached him fully.

"Take care of them. In the future, they will need you, and maybe, you will need them."

༶•┈┈⛧┈♛ ♛┈⛧┈┈•༶

I sighed, stepping out of the doors as I stared at the ground, my mind racing.

Take care of them? Make sure they survive? Train them?

The man must've gone mad.

The spear was once again glistening on my back as I closed the oji doors behind me, sighing in, what I could only describe as, annoyance and confusion. He couldn't surely think I was suited for this job? Me? The half demon all of the kakushi fear, the half demon some of the hashiras constantly have an eye on, the half demon who shouldn't be here, at all.

I was just lucky, that's all.

I shook my head, running a hand through my hair as I stepped off the podium and made my way down the path. Keep him company? Take care of him? How on earth am I supposed to do that? I'm not exactly the comforter type, at all.

But it was the final phrase that ran through my mind constantly, without halt. 'Take care of them. In the future, they will need you, and maybe, you will need them.'

What was that supposed to mean? I know I'm not supposed to question him, but really? I don't need anyone. I'm strong enough as it is. Does he doubt me? Does he think I'm outstaying my welcome of being a guard? Is he underestimating me-

"Oh! Hey (Y/N)-Chan! I thought I'd find you here!"

A voice tore me out of my silent ramble, and I glanced up, watching as a pair of green eyes ran over to me, waving her arm over her head as her braids bounced on her shoulders with each unwavering step.

When she was close enough, she skidded to a stop, halting in front of me, only to grip both my hands and hold them to her chest as she bounced, the biggest grin over her features, a small blush adorning her features. "There you are! We've been looking all over for you!" She cried, leaning her face closer to my own, our noses practically touching.

""We"? What do you mean by, "we"?" I inquired, my brows furrowing as she grinned wider, her eye reflecting all of the wonderful light of the day.

She chuckled, giving my palms a small squeeze before leaning away and nodding her head back to where the path led. "Who else other than our friends?" She inquired, taking a step back and