THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY
fractured || five hargreeves x reader

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX: YOU'RE ASKING ME TO BABYSIT

Written By: peachyhxlland

°•.☆.•°

The Hargreeves siblings, along with Reginald Hargreeves, were standing on Gene and Jean's property and saw the bloody massacre aftermath. Bodies were strewn everywhere, some dismembered, others barely recognizable, while CIA agents swarmed the scene, along with Reginald's private team of investigators. Five was busy talking to one of his co-workers, pointing to scattered evidence, while the rest of the family gathered nearby, trying to piece together the brutal scene.

"Okay, Ben is an asshole. I'll give you that," Allison remarked. "But a mass murderer?" She scanned the carnage as if hoping to find something that would explain what had happened.

Lila walked around as she looked down at the dead bodies around. "Turned everyone into haggis." She bent down and picked up a dismembered arm as she pointed to the umbrella tattoo inked on its forearm. "And they have terrible taste in tattoos," she quipped, waving the arm as if it were some grotesque toy

"Some next-level psycho shit," Diego muttered, shaking his head as he surveyed the massacre.

"This could have been a rescue mission," Viktor countered, his voice tinged with hope as he scanned the barn in the distance, its doors hanging loosely on their hinges as if someone had forcefully pried them open.

"More likely a massacre by two individuals who are growing increasingly violent by the minute," Reginald said coldly, dismissing Viktor's hopeful conjecture.

Viktor glared at Reginald, his jaw tightening. "You don't know that." He shot back defiantly, his frustration bubbling to the surface.

Luther, who had been silent, suddenly spoke up. "Hey, have any of you ever thought that maybe (Y/n) has something to do with all this?" He glanced around, his eyes heavy with concern. "She was kidnapped with Jennifer too, y'know."

Viktor smirked at Reginald, a smug look crossing his face. "I think my rescue mission theory sounds a lot better now, huh, Reg?"

"So, if it was a rescue mission, that could mean Ben has both Jennifer and (Y/n)." Allison replied.

Five returned back to his family to deliver some information. "Alright, so my guys tell me that this whole farm actually belongs to those two lunatics who ambushed us at New Grumpson⸺Gene and Jean Thibedeau."

"Well, maybe Ben killed them too," Luther told Five while Allison crouched down and grabbed a stick, poking one of the corpses near her.

"Not likely," Five countered, glancing over his shoulder. "Forensics found fresh tracks leading out of the barn. So, my guess is they escaped."

"They couldn't have gotten far," Allison muttered, her eyes fixed on the body beneath her. She tilted her head, studying the corpse with eerie precision. "Judging by the signs of rigor mortis, I'd say the time of death was... six, maybe seven hours ago."

Diego shot her a puzzled look, crossing his arms. "How do you know that?" He asked, his voice lacing with disbelief.

Allison turned to look at Diego. "Wichita, PD. Thursday nights at 9/8 Central."

Diego and Viktor stared at Allison in disbelief and bewilderment while Reginald walked away. "Ready the car." He told one of his men, his tone impatient, his thoughts clearly elsewhere. Viktor rolled his eyes but hurried after him, not wanting to let Reginald slip away unnoticed.

Allison took a deep breath. "I gotta make a call," She said before walking away as well to find a phone booth nearby.

Five walked away from his family, his sharp eyes scanning the grim landscape for more clues. The chaos left behind was unmistakable, but something still didn't sit right with him. As he moved farther from the group, Lila glanced toward her husband, Diego, who was deep in conversation with Luther; both of them focused on the sprawled bodies around them. Seeing her chance, Lila slipped away, her footsteps quiet as she followed Five.

She caught up to him, her fingers wrapping around his arm. "You thinking what I'm thinking?" Lila asked, a glint of mischief already in her eyes.

Five, not even bothering to turn fully, cocked an eyebrow. "Rarely, with that mind of yours."

Lila rolled her eyes but didn't let his usual sarcasm deter her. "There might be a way to stop all of this," she said, her voice low but urgent.

Five, already sensing where this was going, pulled his arm away from her grasp, shaking his head. "The answer is no."

Lila frowned as both of them stopped walking. "Hey, you didn't even let me ask the question."

"I know I'm gonna hate it. Why waste the oxygen?"

Lila ignored his cynicism, leaning in slightly as she spoke. "Why don't we use the little time choo-choo, go back in time, and stop the coming Armageddon?"

Five stared at her, his face completely devoid of enthusiasm. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. How would that even work?" His voice was flat, unimpressed.

Lila smirked. "Well, we travel back to the original Jennifer incident. Stop your Ben from ever touching that Jen."

Five was once again not amused nor excited with Lila's plan. "Lila, if you recall, we almost got our heads blown off. Plus, it would never work without a briefcase."

Lila waved his concerns off with a dismissive gesture. "Stop being such a baby. It's worth a shot. Clearly, the rules are different this time. Maybe we don't even need a briefcase." Lila watched Five think about what she said. "You must have those powers for a reason, right?" Lila asked. "Let's use it." She grinned.

Five stared at her for a long moment, his mind turning over her words, but his thoughts drifted. "Lila, you know I still have to find (Y/n). I can't just... leave." His gaze flickered across the gruesome scene around them, and his voice softened just slightly. "It's a relief she's not one of these bodies..."

Lila softened at the mention of (Y/n), her expression growing less mischievous and more empathetic. She took his hand, giving it a light squeeze, her eyes searching his. "We'll be quick, I promise. Look, during our little time travel escapade, we can also figure out where she is. We might even find her before anything happens."

Five sighed, his frustration melting into reluctant acceptance. "Alright, fine. I'm doing this because you're my sister-in-law, and you owe me one⸺big time." He shot her a look, his tone serious. "First sign of trouble, we come back."

Lila's face lit up with a triumphant smile, but before she could respond, her eyes flicked to the side, noticing Diego heading their way. "We do have one problem, though."

Five followed her gaze and saw his brother approaching, his brows knitted in suspicion. "I don't suppose we can explain any of this to him," Five muttered under his breath.

"He's like a sponge that can't take any more water."

Five smirked, a rare bit of amusement flashing in his eyes. "Well, that's your problem to deal with." He straightened, looking around for an escape. His eyes landed on Ethan, one of his co-workers, standing near the barn, still gathering evidence. "I'm gonna go have a chat with my co-worker over there," Five said, already taking a step away. "Come find me after you're done dealing with him."

Lila huffed, watching him walk away before turning to face her husband. She plastered on a bright smile, preparing for whatever interrogation Diego was about to give her.

Five made his way toward Ethan, who was standing near the barn, scribbling notes on his notepad with a focused expression. "Hey." He greeted, his voice low but sharp, pulling Ethan's attention away from his work.

Ethan glanced up, a casual smile forming on his face. "Hey, to you too. Do you know there's a woman who's been insisting on talking to you?"

Five furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "What? Who?"

Ethan chuckled, still jotting down notes but clearly amused by the situation. "Yeah, she was real persistent. Said you'd know where her best friend is. I don't even know how she knows who you are, let alone where you work, but she's been looking for you for a while now."

Five's expression darkened as the realization hit him. He let out a tired sigh, pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose. "Danielle," he muttered under his breath.

Ethan perked his head up in surprise. "Yeah! That's her name. I thought she was your girlfriend at first, but then I saw a picture of you and another girl hanging in your office."

Five turned to give Ethan a slight glare, his voice hardening. "And why, pray tell, are you exactly looking at my personal stuff?"

Ethan raised his hands in mock defense, his smile faltering a bit. "Oh... it was actually right there, hanging on your office wall. Kinda hard to miss," he said, a nervous laugh escaping him.

Five shook his head in annoyance, muttering something to himself. He paused for a moment, weighing his next words. He could picture Danielle's face, her desperation to find you⸺the promises he had made to her. After a deep breath, he looked back at Ethan. "If she comes around again, tell her... her best friend is..." Five trailed off, hesitating. He knew saying you were missing would only send Danielle into a spiral of panic. He clenched his jaw, thinking better of it. "Never mind," he muttered, waving it off. "I'll handle it."

Just as Five turned to walk away, Ethan called after him. "Oh, hey! There's something else you should know," he said, his voice taking on a more serious tone. "We passed by a burning vehicle earlier. Could be the one the suspects used. We found blood at the scene... but no bodies. They're missing."

Five's eyes snapped back to Ethan, his demeanor shifting instantly. "Who's investigating it now?"

"A few of our agents were sent to check it out. They'll update us if it's connected to what we're dealing with here," Ethan explained, though there was a hint of uncertainty in his voice. "It's tricky though. The CCTV near the site was destroyed, and we still need to figure out how to recover any footage. We're working on it."

Five nodded, processing the information. "Keep me posted," He said, his mind already racing through possible scenarios. As he was about to walk away, Five paused and turned back to Ethan. "Oh, and one more thing. Can you let me know if there are any updates on (Y/n) Russell?"

Ethan blinked, surprised. "She's missing?"

"The farm owners took her, but... now she's missing again. I need every clue, every scrap of information you can get me on her whereabouts."

Ethan frowned, tilting his head. "She's your case; why don't you handle it?"

Five's eyes flicked toward Lila and Diego, who were still deep in conversation, Diego's gestures indicating he was probably questioning Lila. Five sighed, a mixture of frustration and resignation washing over him. "Family matters," He said, his voice laced with irritation. "I'll be quick though. If you still can't find anything after I come back, I'll take it from there."

Ethan nodded. "Alright. I'll keep you in the loop."

Five gave a curt nod in response before turning away, his mind already spinning with the implications of the missing bodies, the burning vehicle, and⸺above all⸺your disappearance.

Five spotted his boss, Deputy Director Lance Ribbons, arriving at the scene, and made his way over to him with a quickened stride. "Sir," Five greeted, his voice steady and professional.

"Mr. Five." Lance Ribbons, Five's boss, greeted back. "I thought you said you had this situation under control."

Ribbons and Five walked side by side together, walking through the farm's blood-soaked ground, the remnants of the massacre still fresh around them. Five kept his expression neutral as they surveyed the aftermath. "The situation," he began, carefully choosing his words, "is proving more kinetic than anticipated."

Ribbons looked around, his eyes scanning the carnage. "No shit," He commented. "We have the Texas Tentacle Massacre out here." Ribbons stopped walking and stood in front of Five. "Okay, I need to know who's responsible for this bloodbath."

Five hesitated for a moment, his mind working quickly. He couldn't just blurt out that Ben⸺his brother⸺might be responsible. That would be a disaster. He needed to be smart about this. "Well, sir," he began, his voice measured, "I have a few leads, but before I can follow up, I'm going to need a favor."

Ribbons thought for a moment. "I'm listening."

Five turned slightly, glancing over his shoulder at Diego and Luther, who were both currently busy handling some dismembered limbs with the same enthusiasm children might have for toys. Diego was inspecting one of the severed arms like it was some kind of forensic puzzle, while Luther awkwardly tried to piece together the rest of the body parts, his massive hands making the task look comically absurd. Diego noticed Luther and immediately scolded him.

"Okay, you see those two idiots over there?" He asked his boss. "Those are my brothers. Now, they've kind of stepped all over the crime scene, asking dumb questions, getting in my way."

Ribbons followed Five's gaze and watched Diego scolding Luther for touching the dismembered limbs. Ribbons' brow furrowed as he took in the scene. Five continued, a trace of impatience creeping into his tone. "Do you mind taking 'em back to HQ? You know, show 'em around. Maybe let them hold some guns."

Ribbons' eyebrows raised in disbelief. He let out a disgruntled sigh. "You're asking me to babysit."

Five shrugged, unapologetic. "You want this case solved, don't you?"

Ribbons stared at Five, exhaling a long, frustrated sigh before shaking his head. "You owe me, Five," he muttered, clearly not thrilled with the idea but resigned to it nonetheless.

Five gave a quick nod, already turning to signal his brothers. "Diego! Luther!" he called out, waving them over with a sharp motion. "Come over here. I wanna introduce you to my boss, Deputy Director Lance Ribbons."

Luther and Diego approached Ribbons, whose eyes fixed them with a disapproving stare but offered a stiff handshake. Diego, ever the charmer, greeted him with a smirk and a quick introduction, while Luther gave an awkward, overly firm handshake that made Ribbons wince slightly.

Five, satisfied that his brothers were now occupied, took a step back and watched the interaction unfold with a small sense of relief. Beside him, Ethan appeared, holding a notepad, still processing the chaos around them. "I can't believe you actually managed to convince our boss to babysit your older brothers," Ethan said, his tone a mixture of disbelief and amusement.

Five shot Ethan a look, his expression flat but with a hint of amusement in his eyes. "They may look older, but I can assure you I'm older than them."

Ethan took it as a joke and chuckled.

Five nudged Ethan lightly on the arm. "Keep an eye on them, will you? Just... make sure they don't get into any more trouble."

Ethan frowned. "Wait a second⸺you're asking me to babysit them too?"

Five nodded, unfazed. "You're a champ, Ethan," he replied, patting his arm reassuringly before walking away, leaving his colleague standing there, bewildered.

Ethan stared after him in shock and disbelief, his voice rising as Five moved farther away. "I'm not your assistant, Five! Derek is!"