fezco , ashtray and faye were at the store.

i decided not to go because one , i didn't want to listen to ashtray. and two , i just wanted to stay home.

so currently , i'm watching "the amazing spider-man" for the fourth time.

i wasn't that far into the movie when i heard a noise , making me whip my head around to see ashtray walking in the room.

"i thought you went with fez." i told him , turning back around to watch the movie.

ashtray always goes with fez.. like , ALWAYS.

"didn't feel like going today." he shrugged , sitting further down from me and watching the movie too.

he watched this once , when we were little. but not since then. unless he watched it on his own , which i highly doubt.

i smiled once peter ran into gwen at oscorp. i love gwen's voice.

ashtray turned to me , but i kept my eyes on the screen.

"did we watch this before?"

i nodded , glancing at him. "when you were 8." i'm a year younger than him , which is why i only him "you" and not "we."

he nodded , not saying much for awhile after that , so i didn't either.

but i rolled my eyes once uncle ben started calling out for peter , knowing what part was coming up.

ashtray moved over , getting more comfortable.
but also for closer to me.

we were only 43 minutes into the movie , but fezco and faye had went to the store almost three hours ago , opening late.

i held my breathe , watching uncle ben grab the guy who just stole from the cashier at the store , before a gunshot went off.

i shook my head , letting out that breathe i had been holding when peter walked over to uncle ben.

i turned my head to ashtray , going to start a conversation but i stopped. i never noticed ashtrays features before , how attractive he was.

wait , what the fuck?

i quickly turned my head back to the tv , shaking off the thought of me finding ashtray attractive.

but once i saw him turn to me from the corner of my eye , i turned back to him.

"what?" i asked , acting like i didn't just look at him.

"you look at me first." he squinted his eyes , looking at me like i was stupid.

i shrugged , knowing i did and he was right.

a little over an hour into the movie , i laid my head down , getting kinda tired. ashtray was still next to me , watching peter eat dinner with gwen.

i smiled , remembering something from when me and ashtray were little.

"remember when you were 9 , and you dropped a whole bowl of spaghetti on you?" i spoke up , laughing while doing so.

he turned his head , making eye contact with me.
"you remember that?"

i laughed again , "i wouldn't forget it. that's when we started arguing , you called me annoying."

he made a face , looking he was trying to hold back a smile. but only have a hum in response , neither of us looking away.

i looked down at his lips for a split second , before immediately looking back up at his eyes. kissing him would be wrong , and stupid.

i had almost forgot about the movie until i heard i loud bang , a football peter threw.

as i looked back over at ashtray i noticed he was closer than he was before , making me get nervous.

"when is fez gonna be home? do you know?" i asked a question i already knew the answer to , getting way to nervous while making eye contact with him.

he shrugged , "in like thirty minutes."

but that was a lie , he probably didn't know the time and was guessing. fez would be getting home anytime.

just as i was going to turn back to the tv and act like me and him weren't close enough to lean in , and kiss , he did just that.

grabbing the side of my face , closing the gap between us.

i didn't even hesitate , kissing him back.

but the kiss didn't even last more than five seconds , as soon as i heard the door start to open i put my hand on his chest to stop.

"yo." fezco greeted both of us , walking off to use the bathroom.

"what are y'all watching?" faye asked , sitting on the other couch.

"spider man." i answered , slowly scooting away from ashtray.

i didn't look over at ashtray , not even for a second.

that's so fucked up. miles thought i liked ashtray and i told him i didn't , but i just kissed him.

and fez. oh my god , his little rule. "nah.. i don't want nothin going on between you two." was his exact words four years ago. even if i was ten at the time , he stuck to that as time went on.

i let out a sigh , before standing up and heading to my room , closing the door behind me.

i'm not gonna lie to myself and say i regret it , i kissed him back. i wanted to.
it just.. i shouldn't have. i shouldn't have wanted to kiss him in the first place.

if it was any other person , i would've called the group chat , telling them we kissed. but they've been waiting so long for me to say the three words , "i kissed ashtray" that i didn't want to , also because i don't really want to tell anyone.

-

hours passes and no words were exchanged between me and ashtray , until my door slowly opened and he walked in.

first of all , why does he never fucking knock?

i looked up , putting my phone down.
"what?"

"why'd you walk out like that earlier?"

i shrugged , lying. i knew the exact reason why i walked out like that.

he came and sat next to me , which i don't think is the best idea. if we're going to talk about the kiss , fezco might hear. his room is right in front of mine.

"do you remember what fezco told us a couple years ago?" i asked , looking up.

he raised his eyebrows , "you're actually gonna listen to that?"

so he does remember.

"you're not?" i asked , talking low. fez wasn't very much of a deep sleeper , he could hear.

"no. he said that when i was ten , malani." he rolled his eyes.

"yeah , but he talked about it less than a year ago. he doesn't want it to happen." i replied.

i didn't want to go against fezco , it just seemed wrong to do. but of course , ashtray thinks differently.

"so what? pretend it didn't happened or some shit?" he squinted his eyes , seeming annoyed.

my lips formed a line , i didn't know what to say.

but i guess he took that as an answer , since he scoffed and walked off.

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