twenty three : erased

      ELAINE SILENTLY SAT IN THE CHAIR IN FRONT OF THE HOLOGRAM, WATCHING AS THE NUMBERS OF PEOPLE WHO WERE ERASED KEPT CLIMBING. Her eyes lingered on Bucky's picture as it kept its spot next to the counter. The Avengers Compound was quiet and dark, seeing as it was nighttime outside.

Everyone was either sleeping, pretending to sleep, trying to sleep, or just in their rooms. Elaine watched as the counter was rapidly rising, and she rubbed her sore eyes with the palm of her hand. She was barely watching the counter, just focusing on the image of Bucky Barnes.

She finally stood and began walking to the kitchen to make another cup of coffee. Her brain wasn't functioning how she wanted it to, even though she had been staring at a still image all night. In a mirror's reflection, she saw the gun Bucky held almost one month ago, and instead of speaking, or maybe even crying, her face contorted into anger.

      She smashed the mirror with her hand, accidentally slicing her palm from the glass shards. When she pulled her hand back, she watched as the droplets of her crimson blood began falling into the sink. It was like they were moving in slow motion, the cut in her palm gushing out her blood.

      Her vision suddenly blurred, and she could only remember a piece of her past she cherished every day, only now it pained her to see the memory.

WAKANDA — AFTER BUCKY'S WINTER SOLDIER PROGRAM REMOVAL

      The gyms in Wakanda were unique. They were padded in the necessary spots, with no mirrors, and many, many weapons. Elaine continued to punch the punching bag with her clenched fists, not stopping like she should.

      From the sidelines, Shuri stood by, watching the red headed woman loose control of her emotions once again. "You are doing it again."

      Elaine could hear the words being drawn out of Shuri's mouth in boredom — Shuri hated watching Elaine learn control, she thought it was boring. Elaine stopped punching, turning her body glowing with sweat to the right to face the Princess.

      "Well, what do you want me to do? Pretend the punching bag is a kitten and pet it until it goes meow?" Elaine snapped, throwing her arms out to her sides.

      Shuri actually smiled at the harsh words, hopping from her spot on the sidelines and walking to stand in front of Elaine. "Try this," Shuri handed Elaine a knife, one with a blue tinge in it when shone in the right light. "it's made of vibranium — obviously — and just press the button!"

      Elaine was confused at the excitement radiating from the woman, and she decided to press the black button on the bottom of the grip. It suddenly turned into a double-bladed knife, and now Elaine was interested.

      "What is this?" Elaine breathed out in astonishment from another one of Shuri's odd inventions.

      "Just wait until you feel it, and the knife will lead you!" Shuri explained before rushing out of the training facility, probably for her own safety. "Sorry, don't want you to kill me!"

      When the door closed, Elaine's body began moving in sync with how she thought the knife would want for her to go. It was strange, a simple object leading her whole body to do skilled moves.

      Without her knowledge, Bucky had been leaning on the doorway with his vibranium arm, just a test arm for the scientists to improve daily. He watched her with such intensity, he was slightly confused with how she didn't feel his gaze on her.

      She suddenly stepped on a padded mat that had been accidentally folded up, causing her to loose her grip on the knife and for it to slip from her grasp. Without thinking, she began to retract her hand, but the knife was heading to her own body. In a quick decision, she grabbed one of the blades of the knife mere inches from her abdomen, causing a burning pain to spear through her hand.

      She hissed in pain as she fully dropped the knife to the ground, bringing her crimson stained hand to her chest. Her fingers had droplets of blood dripping off them, and she barely heard the hurried footsteps walking to her.

      A warm hand grasped her injured one's wrist, and looking up, she saw the warm, steel blue eyes of Bucky Barnes. He carefully brought her hand in front of his face after dropping eye contact, inspecting the deep wound.

      "I told Shuri she shouldn't have given you the knife." Bucky muttered under his breath before locking eyes with her again. "Are you okay?"

      Ignoring the tingling pain in her hand, she forced a smile and pushed a lie past her lips. "Yeah, I'm— I'm fine. I-I'll heal." Elaine had no idea why she was stuttering, or why her face felt like someone was holding it to a fireplace.

      Bucky didn't drop his hand, keeping his eyes trained on hers, only she kept avoiding eye contact, slightly afraid of the new feeling bubbling within her. "You should clean this up."

      Elaine meekly nodded, clearing her throat and gently pulling her hand from his. Immediately, the loss of touch made a pit form in her stomach, but she didn't dwell on it for too long, sending Bucky another smile. "Thanks," She turned and walked out, running her noninjured hand through her hair as she looked ahead, only to see Okoye and Shuri standing there.

      "You and Bucky?" Shuri shrieked in excitement.

      "Oh, God."

PRESENT TIME

      When she finally snapped out of her memory, she noticed the broken glass on the counter was shaking. She quickly rinsed her bloodied hand, clenching her teeth as the water burned the wound. Grabbing some gauze and a hand wrap, she covered the open cut on her hand. She turned around, the coffee long forgotten as she stashed Bucky's gun in her closet.

      Running back to the first floor of the compound, she met up with Natasha, who had dark circles under her eyes. Elaine assumed she looked similar, seeing as she barely was able to sleep without the plague of nightmares.

"What the hell was that?" Elaine asked. She held a small part of hope inside her, wanting to know if anyone who went to space survived — mainly Tony.

Natasha shook her head, silently saying she had no clue as they continued their run outside, bumping into Steve and every other Avenger that was awake and residing in the compound.

The black sky contrasted with the bright green grass, illuminated by the garden lights as a glowing figure lowered a huge spaceship onto the grass, ultimately crushing it.

      Pepper was in front, pure hope gleaming in her eyes as everyone was scattered and waiting for the doors of the spaceship to open. When the stairs lowered, Tony Stark and Nebula stepped out.

      Tony looked weak, sick. Steve immediately rushed over to help his friend.

      "Couldn't stop him." Tony whispered, referring to Thanos.

      "Neither could I." Steve told the billionaire, who paused in their walking.

      "Hang on." Tony tiled his head slightly in grief. "I lost the kid."

      Steve remembered Tony wasn't there to see their fight in Wakanda. "Tony, we lost."

      "Is, uh.." He trailed off, but Pepper immediately came into his view. When the couple hugged and shared their relived moment, Elaine bit her cheek to prevent from crying. Why couldn't she have that? Why did she lose everyone?

      When everyone went back inside, Elaine couldn't move. She didn't want to breathe. She never wanted to be in this position; in a world where Wanda, Pietro, Vision, and Bucky were gone. For the first time in a long time, she was alone.

      She had never felt anything like it. Her throat was dry, her skin was ice cold to the touch, her eyes wouldn't stop producing tears, and yet, she hadn't screamed.

      There was nothing left inside of her. There was nothing to scream for.

      "Elaine!" Natasha's voice didn't make her turn around, but she turned her head so the redhead could see her side profile. "Are you coming?"

      Wordlessly, she turned around and walked back to the inside of the compound, letting out a trapped breath of air before continuing to the others.