𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒘𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒈𝒐 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒕𝒐 𝒏𝒐𝒓𝒎𝒂𝒍, 𝒊𝒇 𝒊𝒕 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒂𝒔 

𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒃𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒐𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒈

⁂

Loud static filled her ears, on the other end of the phone.

Juliette swallowed heavily as she tried to force the lump in her throat down.

"Dad?" She asked again, for the third time since she rang the only number in her speed dial.

She closed her eyes, trying to remind herself that she created the anger and disappointment Charlie must be feeling.

"I'm... sorry I haven't called sooner." Even to her own ears it didn't sound genuine.

Her head fell back, thumping quietly against the headboard of her bed. She was taking a purposeful day off from the archives. Juliette figured this was a privilege she could take after the stress of the past couple of days.

The silence seemed to stretch forever before she heard a faint sigh from the other end.

"Jules," Charlie's voice was gruff, tired, and so unlike the man she'd grown up with. "It's been weeks. You didn't think I'd want to hear from you?"

Guilt gnawed at her chest. "I know. I just... things got complicated."

"Complicated?" His voice sharpened. "Your sister told me you two got into a fight. That you just up and left."

Juliette winced, remembering the lie she'd asked Bella to tell him. "It wasn't-"

"Abandoning your little sister? Jules, I just can't figure out what you were thinking." He sounded so deeply wounded, the pain in his voice etching into her ribs. "She didn't even get to see any of the universities there once you left."

On one hand she applauded her sister for maintaining their story, but the other wanted to catch a flight just to throttle Bella.

"It's not like that, Dad." Her own voice came out in a croak. "I just needed space to figure things out."

"Space." His disappointment was so thick it felt as if he were standing before her. "From your family."

Her fingers clenched around the phone, the plastic frame creaking. "I didn't mean for it to sound like that. I just didn't want you to worry."

"Well, it's a little late for that, don't you think?"

The quiet that followed was smothering. She knew it wouldn't be an easy conversation, especially with how long she had put it off, but hearing the hurt in his voice made it unbearable. He had always been her rock, the one steady presence in her life, and she had ruined it.

There had always been one thing both Swans knew for certain, Charlie had Juliette and Juliette had Charlie. Neither one would ever abandon the other after the hurt inflicted by her mother.

Her greatest fear in life was ending up just like Renee.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, voice cracking at the end. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

The line was quiet for a beat, only the sound of Charlie's breathing breaking the silence. When he spoke again, his voice was low, tired.

"I know you didn't Juliette, but you did."

She blinked rapidly, the sting of tears she'd been holding back finally welling up in her eyes. Her father wasn't one for long speeches or drawn out emotions, but when he spoke like that to her, it cut deeper than anything else.

"I was scared," she confessed, barely above a whisper.

Charlie let out another sigh, but there was a softness to it this time, as if he understood, even if he didn't agree. "You don't run from things when they get tough. That's not how I raised you."

"I know." Her throat felt tight, the guilt squeezing her esophagus. "I'm sorry."

There was another pause.

"Where are you now?" He asked, his tone gentler.

Juliette hesitated, fear for his safety flaring. "I'm still... figuring things out."

She tried to avoid specifics, not able to lie to him again.

"You're not in California, are you?"

She froze, heartbeat thudding in her ears. She knew she couldn't tell him the truth, not with so many ears possibly listening.

Juliette's silence hung heavy over the line, each second that passed felt like an eternity. She bit her lip, trying to find words that wouldn't betray or drag her father further into the mess she was ensnared in.

"Jules," His voice cracked, betraying his own worry. "You can- you can tell me if something's wrong."

She exhaled slowly, her mind racing. How could she tell him the truth? The kings, the supposed bond, it was too dangerous for him to know. But lying to her dad, it felt like cutting away a part of herself. There was only so much humanity she knew she could hold onto in the castle.

"I'm safe, Dad." She said finally. It wasn't entirely a lie, not physically anyway. "I promise."

She heard him take a deep breath in. "You don't sound like it, sweetheart."

He could always see through her, even miles away and over the phone.

"It's complicated," Her voice shook. "But I swear, I'll be okay."

"Complicated?" He echoed, voice rising. "Complicated how? What's going on?"

She could hear the desperation in his voice, the need to protect her, and it shattered her.

"Just... trust me. Please." She begged, voice shaking. "I can't explain right now, but I will."

Charlie sounded strained as he spoke. "I've always trusted you, kid. Just... don't make me regret it."

The lie poured out of her faster than she could keep it in. "I was in California, but I've been offered a once in a lifetime undergrad apprenticeship in Europe."

The tone of the calls shifted just as fast as her heart thudding.

"Well, Jules, that's amazing!" He sounded so proud it made her jaw clench. "Why didn't you just tell me that?"

Her mouth felt dry and tongue heavy with deceit. "I should have told you sooner, I was just afraid maybe you'd... you'd talk me out of it."

"Why would I do that?" Her dad sounded hurt again, wounded by her lack of faith in him. "Sure I don't wantyou to be so far away from me, but kiddo, you could have kept me in the loop."

Charlie sounded deeply relieved, so much so that it made her want to weep again. He let out a small laugh, one that sounded almost hysterical.

"You know, for a second there, I was afraid you would say you're hiding out in Seattle." Charlie confessed, the same feverish relief in his tone.

Juliette's eyebrows scrunched in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Her dad sighed, sounding weary again. "Tons of missing people, most college kids just like you. I sent your photo down to the P.D. there just in case..."

A harsh wince fell on her face. Another reason why she was the worst daughter ever, and that was with Bella dating a vampire.

"I promise I have no plans of going to Seattle anytime soon." That and she wasn't allowed out of the castle, let alone the country.

Charlie's relieved chuckle only deepened the pit in Juliette's stomach.

"Well, that's good to hear," he said, voice light. "It's been a mess up there. Don't want you mixed up in any of it."

She swallowed hard. The irony wasn't lost on her. Her father was worrying about missing people while she was trapped in the middle of something far more dangerous.

"Promise me you'll keep in touch, okay?" He sounded hesitant, as if bracing himself to hear another stretch of silence from her end.

"I will," she hoped he couldn't hear the cracks in her voice. "I promise."

Another laugh from Charlie, this one softer, warmer. "Good. You're always welcome back home, you know."

Home.

The world felt like a punch to her gut. She wanted nothing more than anything in the world than to go back to Forks and pretend none of this ever happened. But she couldn't. Not with everything now tied to her very existence.

"I know," she whispered. "I love you, Dad."

"I love you too, kiddo." He replied, breaking her heart all over again.

When the call finally ended, Juliette let the phone slip from her hand and fall somewhere in the tangle of blankets on her bed. The room felt even colder as guilt ate away at her skin.

Juliette sighed, a loud noise this time pulled out of her lungs. A headache was forming as she blindly ran a hand around the blankets to look for her phone. Once in her hands, she scrolled down a list of contacts.

Finally, towards the bottom due to the alphabetizing, she found it.

Sister by Blood, not by Choice

Bella's contact.

Her lips twisted to one side as she debated changing the name, as it had been that ever since she got her first phone in high school. After a brief pause, she resolved that she would rename it later.

The phone rang twice before Bella answered, much to Juliette's relief. Any longer and the anxiety would have had her wanting to throw up.

"Juliette!" Bella exclaimed, she sounded out of breath.

"Hey Bella," Juliette smiled slightly, as if the other girl could see her.

In the background of the call, she heard a door close.

"It's so good to hear your voice." Her sister told her, sounding genuine.

The older Swan laughed slightly. "Bet you never thought you'd say that to me."

They shared a tense and awkward laugh.

Bella sounded hesitant once she spoke again. "How-er, how have you been?"

Juliette slowly blinked, staring ahead at the fireplace. She let the silence speak for itself.

"Right, sorry, bad question." Bella at least sounded sheepish. "Alice has been checking in on you for me, she wouldn't elaborate but she said to tell you she's sorry."

"I don't think I can forgive Alice, at least not right now." She said, not able to hold back the bite in her voice. "Anyways, I was calling because I need some expert vampire advice."

Bella responded fast, sounding confused. "Oh? I could pass you over to Edward, or better yet Carlisle."

Juliette remembered the doctor very well. The Cullens had moved to Forks during Juliette's senior year of high school. While she never had any direct interaction with him, she'd see him sometimes when he was dropping off his freshmen and sophomore foster kids.

Looking back now, she felt even dumber for never noticing something was wrong with the Cullens. Even glasses and ill fitted clothing barely covered up that all of the kids were attractive and more mature appearing physically.

"Is Dr. Cullen like their, I dunno, leader?" A blush lit her cheeks as she asked.

She had picked up the closest thing she could find to vampire lore in the library, though it was more of a cheesy romantic vampire literature than it was factual.

"Leader?" Bella echoed with a laugh. "No, no, well, kind of? He's the coven head, though he's more like their father figure."

"That's... sweet," she struggled to find the right word. "Maybe he could help me with some questions I have."

On the other end it sounded like something was brushing against the mic. She wondered if Bella was nodding her head.

"Sure, yeah, he's home now if you want." Bella told her, the sound of footfalls in the back of the audio.

Her sister's behavior brought the strangest feeling of fondness, something she didn't often associate with Bella.

Juliette didn't reply, listening to the clatter she assumed was Bella moving around in the Cullen house.

"You wanted to speak with me, Juliette?" Carlisle, she assumed.

His voice was light, masculine, and almost British but not quite.

Juliette hesitated for a moment, gathering herself as uncertainty gripped her.

"Yes, hi, Dr. Cullen." She winced at how formal she sounded.

"Please, call me Carlisle," he said warmly. "I understand you have some questions?"

"Yeah," she began, biting her lip. This was it. "I'm... trying to understand some things, and I thought maybe you could help."

"Of course," Carlisle's tone was reassuring, in the sort of fatherly way her own dad had. "What's on your mind?"

She took a deep breath, staring at the flicker of the flames in the fireplace as she spoke.

"Do vampires have... soulmates? Mates?" She wasn't sure what to call it.

The word felt heavy on her tongue, absurd. She braced herself for laughter or a dismissal, but there was only a thoughtful silence on the other end.

"Well, some who have found them would say so, yes." He finally answered. "The bond between mates is something akin to what humans might describe as soulmates."

Juliette's pulse quickened. "So it's real? Like an actual bond that exists?"

"Yes," Carlisle confirmed gently. "It's rare due to the ages of some vampires, but when it happens, it's thought to transcend time and circumstance."

"It can be overwhelming, even for vampires." He continued.

The conversations with Marcus and Aro replayed in her mind. Caius's harsh words echoed too, his resentment and frustration starting to make a twisted sort of sense.

"And if... one of them was human?" She asked, voice almost a whisper as if afraid to even say the words.

"A human and a vampire being bonded is exceptionally rare." Carlisle admitted. "Given the nature of our kind, there's only a few known instances of them meeting prior to both turning. The vampire would feel an intense protective urge, sometimes to the point of obsession."

Juliette swallowed, a bitter laugh escaping her.

"If you're struggling, Juliette," he told her softly. "you're not alone. There are those who can help, who understand what you're going through. Esme and myself, for example."

"Thanks, I... really appreciate it."

"Of course," he replied. "And please, take care of yourself."

She nodded, even though he couldn't see her. "I will. Thanks again, Dr. Cullen."

She hung up, not willing to risk talking to Bella again yet.

Soulmates.

A bond.

A part of her was even comforted to know she wasn't the first human to go through this. She regretted not asking if it was Mrs. Cullen or Dr. Cullen who was the human when they met. Maybe selfishly, she wished it to be Esme, just to hear it from another woman's perspective.

After all, there wasn't exactly any source material for being magically tied to an incredibly attractive volatile vampire.

She sighed deeply, feeling some of the tension in her chest start to ease. The idea of speaking to someone who went through it seemed more tempting than ever.

Juliette wanted to bombard them with questions now, but her own fear of answers held her back. She wondered if all vampires were prone to anger as Caius was, or if they held such a profound level of remorse in them as Marcus, or were as manic as Aro seemed.

She felt a foreign maternal urge to call Bella again and ask her if Edward was treating her right, if he was nice to her. If he made Bella feel half of what Juliette was feeling, she'd find a way to kill him.

Juliette was also working under the assumption that being the human equivalent of the kings girlfriend gave her some sort of vampire-political immunity.

She felt amused imagining herself at the center of some vampire scandal, the controversial human causing havoc for vampires.

A short laugh left her, the sound causing her to slap a hand over her mouth. She would die of humiliation if any vampires in the area heard the sound while she was alone in her room.

As more relief settled over her, another thought struck her, bringing a surprising wave of warmth. She wasn't just feeling better, she actually felt good. For the first time in what felt like forever there wasn't a sharp pain in her chest.

As she settled further into her bed, the memory of her harsh words with Anna crept back into her mind. A twinge of guilt replaced the relief. Anna had been trying to help in her own way.

With a resolve she hadn't felt in days, Juliette stood up from her bed, slipping her shoes on as she moved toward the door. Trying to find Anna felt like the right thing to do, not only to apologize but to clear the air.

She left her room, her boots echoing softly in the quiet corridors of the castle.

Juliette found her in the book archives, her steps hesitant as she pushed the door open. The dim lighting and the scent of parchment provided a comfort she didn't expect. Her nerves were beginning to kick in.

She spotted Anna towards the back, busy at a shelf.

"Hey," Juliette started, unsure of how to even begin.

Anna didn't turn immediately, her movements deliberate as she continued her work.

When she finally spoke, her tone was tight, tense. "What are you doing here, Juliette? You don't have to be down here anymore."

Juliette flinched at the coldness, then frowned. "What do you mean?"

"One of the guards confronted me this morning," Anna turned then, eyes sharp with something that almost resembled resentment. "You've been relieved of your duties. No more archive work for you."

"I didn't ask for that, I didn't even know-"

"Special treatment." Anna's eyes lingered on the books as she shrugged. "Guess that's what happens when you're in good favor with the kings."

Juliette bit her lip, unsure of what to say. "I didn't come here to rub it in or anything. I came to apologize for what happened in the kitchen."

Anna's eyes softened from their glare, but the tension in her posture didn't ease.

"The others are going to be jealous," Anna tutted, waving a hand in the air. "Nicest accommodations, special treatment, no expectations."

The implication hit her like a punch to the gut.

Juliette swallowed the lump in her throat. "Do you not realize I'm basically held captive here? They threatened to kill my sister and I before settling on keeping me here."

Anna didn't say anything, but did at least have the decency to look a bit ashamed.

"I'm sorry you have a twin size bed, but it's the least they could do for me." Juliette spat, moving to the table they normally worked on. "Let me dust off this shit for you while we talk, just so you don't think I'm also lazy on top of everything else."

True to her words, Juliette picked up the tiny delicate cotton duster, running it over a dirty cover lightly. Her actions were soft, but the white knuckle grip reflected the anger in her voice.

"I know you don't know the full story," She continued, "but the only reason I'm here is to make sure that an agreement made between my sister and the kings is fulfilled."

She clenched her jaw, feeling a fire in her veins she lately only felt around the kings.

"I didn't sell my soul, or whatever it is you did just to work here." She spat the words out. "I'm just trying to survive at this point, and if that means working or not working when they tell me to, I do it."

Out loud, it sounded more pitiful than she wanted it to. Like she was a dog, following the command of her owners.

Anna's expression twitched at her words, but she kept her arms folded and eyes hard.

"Maybe I don't know everything," Anna finally said, voice edged with bitterness. "But you're not the only one surviving here."

Juliette paused, her grip growing even tighter on the duster.

"I get it, okay?" Anna continued, her tone softer. "You think it's any easier for me? We've all had to make sacrifices."

Juliette opened her mouth to respond, but Anna cut her off. "You didn't have to sell your soul? Maybe not, but you didn't have to fight to keep it either. You've got their protection, Juliette. The rest of us? We don't have that luxury."

She sat the duster down, her anger slowly giving way to guilt.

"I didn't ask for their protection," Juliette muttered, feeling defensive. "I didn't ask for any of it."

They shared an impassive silence. Juliette clenched