30 | ᴛʜɪʀᴅ ᴘᴇʀꜱᴏɴ

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The last chapter before epilogue.

Enjoy :)

Alya shivered, the chilly wind had her teeth clattering. But, she couldn't care less. She ran as fast as she could, her feet worked on their own. She felt numb, both inside and out.

Alya stopped in front of Zayd's apartment, she hadn't realized she was crying again. She wiped her tears and took deep breaths before making her way inside.

Her feet came to a halt when her gaze fell on a shadowy figure. The cigarette smoke had her coughing, she made her way to the familiar figure. Her hands were shaking as she walked to him. It wasn't because of the cold.

The moonlight falling on Zayd only made Alya's heart clench. He looked so painfully handsome but what lied underneath was more precious to her. How she had wished it was her who mended the heart of the broken boy before her.

The irony though, she ended up breaking him further.

"I thought you had stopped smoking." Her voice was chilling, so foreign to him that he had to look at her for more than a second to believe that it was her.

What was she doing here? He thought. Hope was starting to light inside him.

"I had. Until I had a reason," his voice was just as chilling. Cold. Hard. They spoke as if they were strangers. The air was thick, suffocating. Chilly.

They stood there side by side, looking at the stars. The stars held many memories, a tear rolled down Alya's eyes but she had sobbed so much that day, she didn't even feel it sliding down her cheeks. Thanks to the darkness, Zayd didn't see it.

"There's.. there's something I have to tell you."

"Speak."

Alya took a shaky breath, she turned her gaze from the stars to him. His cigarette was still lit, lazily held in his hand while he looked at the stars.

He had a feeling that something was wrong.  He turned his head and met her eyes. Fuck, he said to himself. He couldn't look away. He hadn't realized how much he had missed her until then.

The moonlight wasn't as bright, he didn't notice her puffy swollen eyes.

"Speak," he repeated, this time softly.

"Stop wasting my time, speak or leav-"

"I love you."

A few moments passed before his heart jumped in joy, a smile broke out on his face. Did that mean they could be together again? Had she changed her mind? He felt his heart beating in ecstasy, he pulled her to him. The feeling of her in his arms wiped whatever depressing thoughts he was having not minutes ago.

He would treat her like the treasure she was, he promised to himself. He promised fo himself that he would make it up for what he had done in the past. He promised to love her with all he had. He promised to love her more than he loved the stars.

He pressed his lips to her forehead.

Alya bit her lips and swallowed the sob building in her chest. How was she going to tell him that she was leaving him? She had never seen him as happy.

"I-I love you. I'm so sorry Zayd, I- I'm sorry- I- mmhm," she moaned in his mouth. Zayd pushed her to the nearest wall as he kissed her furiously, brutally. It wasn't gentle in any way, it was punishing. How dare she tell him she wouldn't be his, he was reminded of the small letter she had sent to him.

How dare she say he deserved much better when she was better than anyone could ever be, he kissed her hard. So hard that Alya's stomach formed knots as she moaned in pleasure. She didn't mind the taste of cigarettes. One of his hand had secured both of her wrists in a firm grip that was raised above her head, his mouth invading hers, showing how he felt about her.

Showing how much he loved her.


They broke apart when she pushed him away, the stars were shining brighter than before. Zayd rested his forehead over his little strawberry's, he was sure that she was blushing. But why did she push him away? He didn't get it.

His little strawberry was back, he again smiled the biggest grin he ever had.

"I love you," he whispered in her ear before kissing her in the forehead again.

"D-don't," Alya started sobbing softly, her cries so soft but so painful, it tugged at his heartstrings. And here I go, again sinning, Alya thought to herself. It made her feel guilty.

Confusion swirled in his chest, dread chilled his bones when he says the never-ending stream of tears.

"I'm leaving, Zayd. I'm leaving," she whimpered.

Zayd froze.

"What?" His voice was alien to both their ears.

"W-we're moving out."

Silence. Long cold silence.

"Where?"

"M-my home country."

"Will you return-" "I don't know."


Zayd jumped away. As if she was fire and had burnt him. He chuckled loudly, it sounded psychotic. His hands tugged on his hair so hard that he would end up pulling his hair out if he kept doing that. He couldn't control the fire that burnt in his chest but that grief, that grief he had felt when his father had died- it overpowered everything.

He didn't want to look at her. Because he knew, he knew he would break. He would break in front of her and she wouldn't pick up the fucking pieces.

She was leaving.

He took some steps back before turning around.

"Zayd, I'm sorry. I love you, please don't do this. I don't want to leave knowing you're angry with me. Zayd.. please," Alya sobbed, she was shaking as the sobs got louder. She couldn't do this, she wanted to pull her heart out. It was hurting so much.

"Please," she whispered. Perhaps, it is for good, she thought to herself, a sinner like myself deserves worse.

He starts walking away. In the cold of night, she was left alone in the front of his apartment. She watched his retreating back until he disappeared inside his apartment.

He left.

"I'm sorry," she whispered to herself.

Zayd rushed to his room, his eyes started to prick.

What had he expected, after all, that's what his loved ones had ever done to him. It wasn't new.

How could he live without her, though? He didn't understand. Her green eyes, he had dreamt of them every single fucking night. Her smile, so fucking beautiful it could light the whole world. The wild things she said that made his heart beat faster. The headscarf she wore that made her look so fucking cute that he wanted to kiss all over her face and keep her to himself. The way she blushed when he whispered things in her ear. He was supposed to be his. His little strawberry.

She was supposed to be his.

He entered his room. Leo greeted him with a 'meow'. Memories came rushing back to him. A sad smile adorned his lips. He took his phone out and looked at the wallpaper.

He looked at the picture he had secretly taken.

She would never be his.

He went to his window and looked outside.  He looked at the dark figure walking away.

A tear rolled down his cheek.


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