Chapter 17

After cleaning up, I changed into a new outfit lucky that Joshua had managed to get me some new stuff, despite the fact that it was the same outfit in different colours: men. It beat repeating clothes and so I could not complain.

As I headed down the stairs, I took in how the house looked and the obvious attention to detail.

One thing was clear: wolves and vampires certainly took their sweet time when it came to organising their homes.

When I entered the sitting room where I had sat with Luc last night, there were guests.

They all looked up at me when I set foot in their midst. Ok, that was creepily weird. It's like they were just waiting for the exact moment I would show up.

The guests comprised of a woman and two other men of whom one looked quite young. They didn't look like Joshua or anything, so I guessed they just had to be some other vampires.

The woman quickly got up and started coming towards me before she suddenly stopped. That was strange, but I had seen and done stranger things still.

"Rhyllie is that you?" She asked her voice breaking off at the end.

"Should I know you or something?" I asked before turning to look at Joshua.

"Doesn't she remind you of someone?" He asked, but I didn't know.

I looked keenly at the woman who also had extremely long black hair, was a bit chubby, and had green cat-like eyes. Her eyes... My breath caught. This woman was my real mother!

I didn't know what to say. What do you say to a woman who gave birth to you but hadn't met a day in your life? I wasn't angry or anything, I mean I grew up having a mother until she'd died and she was the only mother I had known. This other woman, I didn't know her and even if she is my biological mother, I didn't think it would make a major difference in my life at this point. Maybe it would just be good to know I had a mother.

"You're a woman, and so beautiful!" She said coming closer to me and taking my face in her hands. "I never wanted to give you away." She said, a single black teardrop rolling down her cheek.

"I didn't grow up suffering or anything like that. I had a family and they loved me," I said.

"I loved you too. I loved you from the moment I knew I was going to have you. You were mine. The only thing I regret was not being able to be a mother to you, be there for all the milestones in your life. Help with boys, and dances: everything you could have needed."

"I never went to the dances and I never had a boyfriend. You didn't miss out on much except maybe teaching me how to apply Goth make-up, because by then, my other mom had already died. I didn't have this Cinderella life and I never learnt to bake cookies or anything because I just wasn't normal!" I never thought about it often, but I hated that I never really was my mom's daughter. I never learnt to bake although she had a bakery and I never felt like doing all those girl things with her, and then she was dead.

I didn't want to have another mother and I didn't want anything at that moment. I ran outside and kept running as far as my legs could take me.

I finally stopped at a deserted place where there were orange leaves that had fallen from the tree and collapsed.

My life was a circus. I hadn't gotten over one thing before something else was thrown at me. What was next?

"That wasn't the reaction I expected, but then again you always react to things in your own way," Joshua said squatting next to me. "Your mother's been through a lot Rhyllie. She needs to feel that you love her, that you can give her a chance. Why won't you do that?" He asked.

I didn't want to be a bad daughter a second time around. "Do you ever feel like you are going to be a disappointment or that you are going to hate yourself again for something?" I asked him back.

"I can't say that I know how it feels, but I have made some mistakes in my life that I could never go back in time and correct."

"What exactly?" I asked looking at a dead leaf. Its life was over.

"I let the wolves massacre my family," he said bitterly almost like he was remembering it.

"But they were also vampires, they could defend themselves."

"That's just the thing, it was my duty to defend them and I failed. Attacks from the wolves were always a possibility. I was young and I still hadn't realised how long forever truly was. It was my turn to keep watch for the wolves. But like so many times before, I went into town and left our home unprotected. I never thought that today would be the day the wolves strike. They hadn't attacked us in a long time that I didn't even have a guard to let down," he said pausing to catch a breath.

"When I came back, I knew something was wrong. I had a feeling that I had done it this time. When I ran into the house, everything was thrown about, no one responded when I called out. I went to the backrooms where the bedrooms were. I could smell blood even before I reached the last corridor. They'd come in surprise and judging by the damage, they had come in their numbers. They'd ripped them apart without even putting up a fight and left. That's what I'd had to live with; knowing I can't go back and save them. Knowing I let my sister die. You have a chance to know your mother, don't screw it up," he said rising up and walking past me into the woods.

I watched him go, not knowing what I could actually say to make him feel better or tell him that it was destiny that saved him but couldn't spare his family.